Chapter 2
Joanna
I closed Bastian’s office doors behind me before letting out a shaky breath. It didn’t matter how many months I had worked here for him—I still felt that tingly nervousness in my stomach when I was around him. Any woman who came across Bastian Burke felt that fluttery sensation. I was sure of it. He was a walking Greek god of a man, from those bulging muscles that threatened to tear the seams of his shirts and pants to the brown hair with golden honey highlights. Not to mention those dreamy cerulean-colored eyes that were stormy and distant. Even a bit cold at times.
But I had felt those eyes leave fiery trails when Bastian looked at me. They had skimmed across my hips, breasts, and even my backside. I had felt it, even though a rational part of me told me it was my imagination running wild again. I’d had my fantasies about Bastian. Fantasies that left me wet and aching.
Like now, for instance. Moisture pooled between my thighs. I could feel it soaking through the fabric of my underwear.
I cleared my throat as I walked across the sprawling floor to sit down at my desk. Working for Burke Management was a dream come true in a shitty job market. I couldn’t complain about the nice paychecks, the generous benefits, and the paid vacation time. Salt Lake City was booming with jobs, but not the type of jobs that Burke Management provided.
My phone buzzed from inside my desk drawer. Just hearing it rattle against the wood made my stomach clench into dreadful knots, but I reached in to pull it out anyway. If I didn’t reply now, Sid would text me all day, every fifteen minutes, until he got the response he wanted. It was just better to answer it now instead of having my phone going off all day while I tried to concentrate on work.
When are u going to be home?
I texted back quickly. Five thirtyish. Gotta go. Boss doesn’t like it when we’re on our phones.
Coming to work every single day at Burke Management wasn’t just a blessing—it was a damn break from the mess my personal life was. Years ago, Sid had been the ideal boyfriend. He had been sweet, charming, and protective over everyone in his life. He attributed it to being a police detective. He’d seen the worse that anyone could imagine, and he dealt with crime all day long.
These days, though, his protectiveness had turned into something completely different. It was overbearing. Controlling. Suffocating. I had no idea how it was possible to break free of someone like Sid, who had connections everywhere I turned. I cared about him, though. It wasn’t always so bad. There were good times, really good times to remind me of the relationship we had started off with.
Fingers snapped in front of my face.
“Sabrina,” I said, clutching at my racing heart. “Don’t sneak up on me like that! Where did you come from?”
Sabrina leaned across my desk with a frown. She ran a searching gaze along my face, reading the emotions there. Her curly brown hair bounced as she took a seat in the chair across from me.
“I’ve been standing here for the past minute,” she said. “I called your name three times. You’re lucky it was me standing here and not Mr. Burke, because we all know how annoyed he gets at his employees being spacy.”
“Yeah. I’m grateful it was you.” I cleared my throat while smoothing out the wrinkles in my sweater. “Is there something you need over here?”
“Nothing in particular. I just wanted to see if you were interested in going to a concert after work on Friday night.”
I wrinkled my nose. “A concert?”
“Yes, a concert,” Sabrina said. “We haven’t had a girls’ night out in a long time. I can’t even remember the last time we went out for coffee even.”
“It’s been a while,” I conceded with a guilty smile. “It’s just been so busy with work and with everything going on at home.”
Sabrina’s red lips pulled into a deep frown. “What’s going on at home?”
“Nothing,” I said too quickly. “Why would you ask a question like that?”
“Because I get the feeling that your boyfriend doesn’t like it when we hang out. That’s why I asked the question.”
We were treading into a sensitive topic. Again. Sabrina was outspoken about everything she didn’t feel was right. One time, I had managed to convince Sid to let Sabrina come to the movies with us, and it had ended in a shit-storm of arguments. She didn’t like the way Sid had dictated everything about the night. Sid didn’t like Sabrina’s attitude. I had been stuck between them, trying to please both of them at the same time.
“He doesn’t care if we do,” I said, and Sabrina scoffed. I looked away and at the computer screen. “I’m serious. He doesn’t care that we do. It’s just been busy at home is all.”
“Okay,” she said in a disbelieving voice. “If that’s the case, then what do you say about Friday night?”
I chewed on my bottom lip nervously because I already knew what Sid would say. But I also knew what Sabrina would say. “I’m not sure, Sabrina. It’s a concert, and I know how Sid feels about me going out when he’s on duty.”
“Do you need permission from him to hang out with a friend?” Sabrina asked hotly. “I mean, seriously. Does he think he’s the king of Salt Lake City? You’re a free woman to do what you want. No man should be controlling what you do when you aren’t doing anything wrong in the first place.”
“He’s a police detective,” I replied defensively. “He’s just trying to protect me because he knows what happens at things like concerts. He investigates murders and rapes all the time, Sabrina. Forgive him for being a bit concerned.”
“You can’t shelter everybody from the real world. It’s not him being protective, Jo. He’s trying to control you because he doesn’t trust you out there alone without him.”
A headache pounded behind my eyes. Pinching the bridge of my nose, I held up a hand when Sabrina opened her mouth to continue on.
“Fine,” I said. “Count me in.”
Sabrina narrowed her eyes at me. “Don’t back out either. I’m securing these tickets as soon as I get back to my desk.”
“I won’t back out. I promise.”
“I’m holding you to your promise,” Sabrina said, rising from her chair. “I’ll drop the tickets off to you later this afternoon once I get them printed out.”
“Sounds good.”
I let out a pent-up breath the second Sabrina walked back across the hallway to her office. It felt like it was getting more difficult to maintain this delicate balance between my job, my personal life, and my friendships. Nothing ever felt good enough anymore.
The doors to Bastian’s office were still closed when I glanced over my shoulder to check that he was still in his phone conference. That was the last thing I needed—for Bastian to come out when I had my phone in my hand. That was a sure way to get fired right on the spot. I texted Sid with a pounding heart.
Sabrina invited me to a concert this Friday. I’m going to go.
I set my phone down on my thigh because I knew Sid would respond within a minute. He always had his phone on him. Even on his days off, he was on call for the police department. My phone buzzed thirty seconds later.
Absolutely not. U aren’t going.
I swallowed the bulge in my throat. It’d be nice to go, Sid. I haven’t hung out with Sabrina in a long time. I need to do something fun.
Getting drunk at a concert is your idea of fun? I winced at that. What the fuck will happen if some guy hits on u?
I texted back. That won’t happen. I love you. I wouldn’t let it happen.
It doesn’t matter if you do or don’t love me. There are sick fuckers out there that I deal with every damn day. You aren’t going to the concert.
Tears filled my eyes as I stared down at my phone screen. I had known this would happen. It was like talking to a wall sometimes when it came to convincing Sid that I could handle myself on my own. I didn’t need a protector.
You’re going to be working that night, I texted quickly. What’s the problem with me going when you’re working? If something happened, you’d know about it right away.
Those three little dots on my phone screen were the worst, knowing he was typing back a response. I waited for it. I waited for the slew of words while a long minute stretched by.
His message came through. I’m trying to protect you from sick people. If you want a boyfriend by the end of this conversation, then you better not be going. I don’t care what the hell your friend tries to say about it. You’re staying home Friday night like the good girlfriend you are 95% of the time. End of the damn story.
“Motherfucker.”
The word slipped out like poison without me meaning to say it. I clapped a hand over my mouth, but it was too late. Bastian’s doors were open. He stood right alongside my desk, surprised. My cheeks flared hotly as he cocked an eyebrow at me curiously. Shit. Shit. Shit.
“Something wrong?” he inquired.
“N-no,” I stuttered out, hiding my phone beneath my desk. I could feel it vibrating like mad in my palm. “I’m sorry. Nothing is wrong. Everything is perfect.”
Bastian gave me a long and intense look with those icy eyes that left me squirming nervously on the edge of my chair. He didn’t move from the side of my desk. I let my phone drop inside my boot because I couldn’t pull the drawer out without Bastian seeing it. There were a few files in his hand, so I put my hand out to take them with the presumption he wanted them to be filed.
“Would you like me to file those for you, sir?” I asked politely. “I can do that for you—”
My hand knocked against the paper trays on the corner of my desk. Papers fluttered to the floor, along with a crash of plastic. Humiliation filled me as I rose quickly to my feet, but I stopped short when I realized Bastian’s eyes were focused on my breasts, not the papers and mess around his feet. My heart pounded to a different tune this time. There was no denying it. He was staring at me, and I loved it. My stomach fluttered in arousal as Bastian’s eyes flicked away to the floor.
I came around the desk hurriedly to gather the papers while Bastian crouched lithely to help. Our fingers brushed against one another’s when he handed me a stack. Electric sparks went up my arm at the brief touch, and my hands trembled as I rifled through the papers to organize them again.
“Joanna.”
The sound of my name coming out of those stern lips sent a shudder straight through my legs. I looked up to find that Bastian was a bit closer to me than expected. My heart leapt at his proximity. I could smell fresh cologne lingering on his skin, along with the clean, fresh scent of laundry soap.
“Yes?” I asked breathily. “I’m sorry. I’ll make sure everything gets put back together right and—”
“If you need anything,” Bastian said over me, firmly, “don’t hesitate to ask me. You can trust me with whatever is going on. There’s an open-door policy here in my office.”
I stared at him in surprise. Not once had Bastian extended any type of concern in my direction. He nodded briefly at me before continuing on his way down the hallway in the direction of the elevators. I let out a shaky breath while I organized those papers. My phone buzzed again in my boot. I reached down to pull it out and read Sid’s text messages.
Do you understand me, Joanna?
Answer me.
You better not be ignoring me.
I powered my phone down before tossing it into the desk drawer. I didn’t want to deal with Sid anymore throughout the day. I also didn’t want to focus on the way my stomach was fluttering from my exchange with Bastian. Rumors flew around the office about how he spent his free time with women. He had heartache written all over those commanding features.