I paused before opening the back door of my house. My only play here was to pretend I hadn’t seen any of his calls or messages. I turned off my phone and shoved it back into my purse. The back of my hand brushed against my engagement ring. I pulled out my two rings and slid them on. The diamond glinted in the sun, teasing me into thinking it was beautiful. But it wasn’t. It was hideous and so was everything it represented. I unlocked the door and prayed he was in a good mood.

He was pacing the floor. His cell phone was pressed to his ear and he was yelling into the receiver. His other hand was waving in the air frantically. When we locked eyes, we both froze.

Me in fear.

Him? I had no idea what was wrong with him. But something was definitely wrong. And I had a feeling that it actually had nothing to do with me.

The silence was unnerving. I wanted to turn around and run. I wanted to disappear into the woods and never be found. But I couldn’t move. “You’re home.” I plastered a smile on my face. “What a wonderful surprise.”

“Never mind. She’s home,” he said into the phone and tossed it onto the table.

In two steps he was right in front of me.

I closed my eyes, expecting the worst.

He wrapped his arms around me, leaving a trail of kisses from my jaw to my neck. “I thought something happened to you, babe.” He took a deep breath, like he was breathing in my scent in order to remember it for eternity. The thought was haunting.

I tried to step back, but he wouldn’t release me. “Why? Have you been home long?” The scent of him made me gag.

“Hours.” His arms wrapped tighter around me, suffocating me.

“I’m so sorry. I went for a walk. Why didn’t you call?”

He took a step back and ran his fingers through his hair. “I did call. I left dozens of voicemails and texts. I was so worried.”

“What? I would have heard it.” I pulled my phone out of my purse. “Oh, no.” I put my hand on my forehead. “It’s off. Something in my purse must have bumped the power button.”

His sigh was heavy. I was terrified he wouldn’t believe my lie.

He went to the fridge and opened up the freezer. “You have a twisted ankle. What on earth were you doing walking around for hours? Sit down, Adeline.”

“It’s a mild sprain. And I was growing restless. I needed exercise. It’s hard to be cooped up in here all day when I’m used to running in the mornings. I must have lost track of time.”

He pulled an ice pack out of the freezer. “Sit. Down.”

I sat down in one of the kitchen stairs and took my boots off. He watched me the whole time. Assessing me. Analyzing me.

“I drove around looking for you. I didn’t see you out walking.”

“I was walking in the woods.” It wasn’t a terrible lie. It’s not like he knew I was scared of the rustling of leaves in the wind. Or the shadows that lurked in the darkness.

“The woods.”

I watched his face as he let the thought settle. He believed me. I took a deep breath.

He placed the ice pack down on my ankle. “You missed your last appointment with Dr. Nash.” He didn’t look up at me. He kept his gaze on my ankle. Like he cared.

“You called my psychologist?” That was unacceptable. “We had a deal.”

“You were missing, Adeline.”

“I was hardly missing. I went for a walk. I needed fresh air.”

“Regardless, we had a deal too. You promised you’d go to your appointments. Fortunately, she has an opening in an hour.”

“I’m not going.”

“Why? Because you’re done taking your pills? You think you don’t have any problems? News flash, Adeline, you’re a mess. Who goes walking in the woods for hours on a sprained ankle? You’ve lost control.”

“I haven’t lost control. I needed fresh air. You can’t keep me in this house!” I was panting. He had pushed all my buttons. On purpose. I could tell because he looked happy by my outburst. Like I had just proven to him just how out of control I was. But I was completely in control. And all I could think about was the fact that he said I was done taking my pills. Had he looked for them? Did he really know that?

“It’s for your own safety. Look what happens when you leave.” He gestured to my ankle.

“It was an accident.”

“And I’m supposed to trust your word on that?”

“Yes. Trust me. I haven’t done anything wrong. Please.” I reached out to him, but he took a step back.

“Okay, I’ll trust you. In the spirit of mutual trust, how long have you been off your pills, Adeline?”

“I’m not. I’ve been taking them every day.” I didn’t know how to tell the truth anymore.

“Bullshit. You haven’t been going to your psychologist and there are no pill bottles in your drawer.”

“You’re not allowed to talk to my doctors.”

“I’m the one paying for them!” He stepped back up to me and put his hand on my shoulder. Right where he knew I was hurt. Right where he had hurt me. “How long have you been off your medicine?” His fingers dug into my bruises.

“I haven’t…”

His fingers dug in deeper.

“Seven days! I haven’t taken them for a week.”

He released his grip.

“I’m sorry. They were making me sick.” I was already blubbering. “I couldn’t think straight. I…” my voice trailed off as I watched him pull something out of his back pocket and set it on the table.

“And what’s your story about these?” He removed his hand.

My bottle of birth control tablets was sitting there, staring at me, mocking me. Why hadn’t I thrown them away? I didn’t need them anymore. It was a careless oversight. As was throwing out my other prescriptions. I should have kept the bottles. Of course he’d look. He had no respect for my privacy.

“They’re old,” I said.

“I called the pharmacy. It’s new enough for you to still have refills available.”

“No…” I let my voice trail off. What was the point in lying anymore? He had caught me. “You said you wanted kids. I can’t…” I was losing it. I was becoming the crazy person he thought I was. “I will not have your children.”

“Get dressed.”

“I am dressed.”

“You know what I mean. Something more appropriate.” He waved his hand dismissively.

He meant a dress. Like the gawkers wore. I would never be one of them. He couldn’t mold me into something I wasn’t meant to be.

“We’re leaving in ten minutes,” he added when I didn’t move. “And if you say one more word, I’ll make that phone call and we can put this conversation on hold for a few months.” He dumped my birth control pills in the trashcan.

He was trying to fire me up. He wanted to send me away again. But the joke was on him. I didn’t need those pills anymore. The shot I had gotten would prevent anything with his genes from growing inside of me.

I stood up, letting the ice fall from my ankle. He could go to hell. I’d tell my psychologist everything. He’d be in jail before dinner. He was fucking done. I was done holding onto his secrets. I was done protecting my past. Done. I didn’t care what happened to me. It was time to end him.