Five

 

 

istractions, it turned out, did come in the friend-approved variety.

I arrived to school at the last possible minute on Monday morning, kept my head down to avoid even running the risk of looking at Cole, made excuses I had to see Coach at recess but hid in the library, then kept to myself in class, feigning a headache when the girls asked what was wrong. Beat looked at me, puzzled, for a moment before she let it go.

When the bell rang for lunch, though, Rachel had me outside at our table before I could even begin to think of an excuse to go hide again. I ate quickly, hoping desperately that Beat would keep Rachel and Cassidy distracted when Mike and Declan weren’t doing the job.

Distractions, though, came from all sides.

“Rory!” I heard Jaime call, and I literally sighed aloud.

Beat shot me a sympathetic smile before I looked up.

Jaime was motioning for me to join him. I hopped off the table and walked over, wondering why he couldn’t just come to me.

“We missed you on Friday. I missed you on Friday.”

“Um, thanks, yeah sorry… I got caught up with…stuff…” I replied.

He took a step towards me and I mentally prepared for what I suspected was coming next. Why hadn’t I put a stop to it sooner?

“So, I was wondering what you had planned on Saturday?”

“Coaching, soccer, probably a shower… Depends on the mud content of the day,” I said, stressing the word ‘mud’, but he didn’t seem to notice.

“And, after?”

“Why? What were you thinking?”

He smiled. “I thought maybe we could get some food, maybe see a movie?”

“Uh, well, I have a family thing… Gran’s birthday,” I said quickly, lying through my teeth. “Sorry, will be a bummer to miss.”

“Ah well, maybe next weekend then?” he asked. I nodded and, before I could answer, he spoke. “Great, it’s a date.”

I was about to refute that statement when he kissed me full on the mouth. Now, it wasn’t like it was my first kiss or anything, but, in the past, I’d been a little more into the guy…or at least hinted I was, before he tried to stick his tongue down my throat.

After my moment of shock passed, I gently extricated myself, and turned around to walk back to my friends, or possibly home… I hadn’t decided quite at that point.

However, before I could form any kind of appropriate retaliation to Jaime, his hand was in mine. Not that I really noticed, because I was busy looking at Cole paused in the middle of crossing the courtyard. A flicker of shock passed over his face before his expression slammed into the unimpressed sarcasm I’d seen the first day of term. Although, that wasn’t the most impressive thing about his face; what struck me was the spectacular bruise around his left eye.

Before I’d finished pulling my hand from Jaime’s, Cole was gone.

“You okay?” Jaime asked as I managed to keep my hand out of his grasp.

“Yeah, sure,” I replied, sounding somewhat harsher than I’d probably intended.

I picked up my bag and swept into the building before anyone could stop me. Based on their looks, Rachel and Cassidy had known Jaime was going to ask me out. And, equally, they weren’t sure if he’d succeeded or not.

Well, Cole did say Jaime was telling people you were dating…

Maybe I needed to find a new date to the dance? Maybe, I could go stag? Did girls go stag? What was their equivalent? I doubted it was ‘go doe’…

I managed to avoid talking to Jaime about actual dating for almost the next two weeks. Although, we seemed to fall back into the weird pseudo-dating pattern. Again, it wasn’t that I didn’t like Jaime; he was fine. I enjoyed his company, we had similar interests, I found him very pleasing on the eyes, I flirted with him a little, and I liked that he showed interest in me. At least, I had until a few weeks ago, when Cole had invaded my brain.

Mind you, after Jaime’s little display in the courtyard, Cole was once again nothing but an annoying, sarcastic, flirtatious, slacker with nothing but his face to commend him. He bowed his head dramatically as he greeted me with “Hannibal”. Even when we had to split into our study pairs, he’d avoided every effort I’d made to engage with him; finally, I gave up and just did my own work.

So, by the end of Week 7, when Jaime asked me to go out with him on the Saturday night, I’d decided that Cole wasn’t worth my while. Jaime was actually interested, and I’d give him a proper shot. Because, I’d totally stuck to my plan of no distractions until now…

 

¢

 

“So, how did it go?” Cassidy giggled as she pulled another dress off the rack.

I sighed. “It wasn’t an unmitigated disaster.”

“What?” Cassidy’s face showed exactly what she thought of that as an answer.

“He was a gentleman, we talked, laughed. There was decent food, he paid for popcorn and…grape vines.”

“Oh!” Beat, Rachel and Cassidy all cringed, knowing perfectly well how much I despised them.

“Yeah,” I nodded, “but, other than that, it went well.”

“So, are you dating?”

“We went on a date…” I replied, running my hands over dresses but not really feeling into it. “I would hardly call that dating. If he impresses again, I’ll think about.” I huffed a laugh, pleasantly surprising myself when I realised I meant it.

With Cole out of my mind – for the most part…sort of…I could pretend… – I found the idea of dating Jaime more appealing than I had two days after being stood up.

“What colour are you going to pick?” Beat asked me.

I sighed. Most years, we would have picked a dress for the dance weeks earlier.

“God, I don’t know… What are you thinking?”

“Red,” she said without hesitation.

“Good. Nice, bold colour.”

“Think of it this way, if you pick something now, you both get Cass and Rach off your back and you don’t have to come shopping again!”

I laughed. “True.”

“How about green, to match your eyes?” she asked. She could obviously tell what I thought of that idea by my face. “All right, maybe not… How about pink?” Again, I made a face. “Blue then, blue like your favourite food! If Jaime knows what’s good for him, he’ll get you a corsage of blue vines.” We both laughed.

“Yeah, and I’ll have eaten it before we get in the car,” I replied.

“Come on, there must be something here.”

We rifled through the racks for what felt like hours, trying on so many different outfits. It was like a montage in a movie, complete with hysterical giggling. Finally, we all found the perfect dresses.

Cassidy’s was pink and a lot shorter than I would have chosen, but at least it covered everything for once. Rachel’s was black, clinging and floor-length with diamante detailing at her waist. Beat chose a red knee-length dress that was strapless. And, me… I found a midnight blue, floor-length, swishy, halter neck design that hid what needed hiding and flaunted what could be flaunted acceptably at a school function.

Next, of course were shoes. Cassidy, Rachel, and even Beat chose high-heeled monstrosities that made them tower above me and I knew would be off before the night had really begun – it was the same every year! I decided on a pair of ivory high-top Converse, knowing no one would see them and I’d be super comfortable all night. Plus, new converse!

I had just started to think we were done when we had to look for handbags, and jewellery, and make up. Then book a hair appointment all together for early on the Saturday afternoon.

Beat and I exchanged many weary glances, wondering why everything had to be new. I had plenty of nice necklaces and earrings that would go nicely with my dress. A bag, I had needed, much to my annoyance, so I got something small my phone would fit in.

God, if it was this bad for the Winter Dance, what were Spring Formal preparations going to be like?

Finally, I was allowed to head home with my purchases, getting out of the great milkshake consumption that occurred after Cassidy and Rachel shopped for hours.

“You sure you don’t want one? Even to go?” Cassidy asked, again.

“Thanks, no, Ben and I have a date with an ice cream van.” I smiled.

I hugged them each goodbye, thankful that my friends didn’t give me grief for spending so much time with my family.

The bus home was quiet and made good time, but, when I got in the door, Ben wasn’t home.

“He’s in the park with Matt, I think,” Dad said from behind his newspaper.

“Okay, I’ll go find them.”

“Oh, did you get a dress?” Mum called.

“I did; I’ll show you later.”

“Go hang it up before you go out.”

I muttered, but did as I was told, then headed out to find Ben and Matt. They were out on the grass, practising their soccer skills. Ben lobbed the ball to me when he saw me and I joined them for a bit until I realised I did actually hear music and wasn’t imagining it. I turned and saw Cole sitting on a bench at the edge of the grass. He was strumming a guitar, though I didn’t know the song, and I saw his lips moving as if he was singing.

“He comes out and practises while we do,” Matt explained.

Ben nodded. “He’s not bad.”

“I see that.” I figured now was as good a time as any to talk to him, so I left the boys to their practise and walked over to him.

Something made Cole stop and look up. Whether it was because he saw me coming over or not, he put the guitar down and assumed one of his annoying smirks. He pulled out a cigarette and had it lit before I sat down next to him.

“How was your date?” he asked.

“I’d ask how you knew, but I don’t really care,” I replied, dryly.

“So, it was the stuff of legend, then? All you’d hoped for and more. Love blossomed? Cherubs sung in the heavens?” he laughed.

“God, do you never get tired of hearing your own voice?”

“You seemed to like it a few weeks ago.”

And, I had. Spending the evening chatting with him had been what I would have considered a much better date than the one Jaime and I went on the night before, even though that one had been perfectly nice and normal.

“I liked you a few weeks ago.” I shrugged, then forced my face to remain neutral when I realised what my words might have implied.

Of course, the implication was not lost on him, evidenced by his chuckle.

“Please, don’t stop on my account,” I said, indicating the guitar.

“You like that, too?”

“I just wouldn’t dream of robbing you of the opportunity to hear your own voice.”

“Hung out with Jaime again today?”

“Dress shopping.”

“Jaime wears dresses?” he whooped.

“With the girls.” I rolled my eyes.

“Did you pick something lovely?”

“If you didn’t sound so sarcastic, I might think you cared.”

“Well, I’ll have to judge for myself on the night then, won’t I?”

I turned sharply. “You’re going?”

He blew out a puff of smoke, shrugging. “Kelly, what’s her name, Preston asked me. She seemed very determined, wouldn’t take no for an answer. Offered me…anything…” he finished suggestively. He leant his elbows on the back of the bench but winced slightly as though something hurt. I would have asked him if he was okay, but I was a little distracted.

Apart from the fact that I could imagine Kelly doing just that if she fancied him… I didn’t really want to picture Kelly and Cole up to…anything. I knew I had no right or reason to be upset they were going together, but I was a little bummed out.

Isn’t it good emotions listen to sense?

I stood up. “Good for you. I hope the two of you have a lovely night.”

He seemed to know exactly how to laugh and how to smile in the way that would both infuriate and attract me. “Oh, I bet we will.”

How could one guy look so damned attractive but so irritating at the same time? How could you honestly simultaneously want to kiss and pummel someone?

I glared at him. “Goodbye, Cole.”

“Goodbye, Hannibal.” His voice seemed to lose some of its sting, but I strode off without looking back and went back up to my room.

Ben didn’t seem to mind, or notice.

I could see them from my window; the two boys passing the ball back and forth, and Cole strumming his guitar on the bench. Seeing him from up here, there was something really lovely about him, his face soft and almost tender. I could almost forget he was a sarcastic jerk going to the Winter Dance with my mortal enemy.

I considered opening the window in case I could hear him sing, but it was too damn cold for that. I considered going back down to play soccer with the boys, but knew I’d feel stupid after I’d stormed off.

Instead, I spent the rest of my afternoon playing Mario Kart by myself. God, I am so cool!

 

¢

 

Our Pride and Prejudice assignments were not going well.

Cole was in one of his ridiculously annoying moods, saying anything and everything he knew would get a reaction out of me. I, stupidly, rose to the bait every time. If he didn’t infuriate me so much, I might have thought that our banter was some kind of intellectual flirting.

I huffed, putting down my pen. “If you put as much effort into your essays as you do in arguing with me, you’d get A’s!”

He smirked. “I’m just saying, Lizzy seems like an idiot. I mean, he’s supposed to be handsome, rich, smart. And, what does she do? Just assumes he’s a wanker?”

“There’s the prejudice for you. It’s Darcy who’s an idiot. He should just accept he likes her in the beginning and hang his family.”

“And there’s the pride,” he replied. “I can’t believe she flew off the handle like that when he finally admitted his feelings for her.”

I groaned. It was not the first time we’d had this conversation. I really should have known better, but I couldn’t stop myself arguing every time he opened his damned sexy mouth.

“Maybe if he hadn’t been such an arrogant prick and insulted her, she would have responded better. She even says so herself!”

“Tell me you didn’t spend the whole book just wanting them to get over themselves and be together?” he said, breaking the usual pattern.

“No, I didn’t.” I looked at him. “Why? Did you?”

“So, what if I did?” He shrugged.

At the look on his face, I burst into laughter and it wasn’t long before he was laughing too.

“Just admit you liked it,” I said.

He shook his head. “Never. Frankenstein, fine, not bad. But no, Austen doesn’t get me going. The mother, though, she’s not half bad.”

“Oh, Mister Fielding!” I said in perfect imitation of a BBC Mrs Bennet.

We fell into another fit of laughter.

It was times like these, the rare moments we connected in English, that I thought I saw something more in him. And, maybe there was something more in him? Maybe it was just all in my head? Maybe it just didn’t matter, because, overall, we weren’t compatible. All the other times seemed to back up that theory; the times I saw him in fights, not paying attention, or just being…delinquent.

I mean, the guy didn’t even seem to know if he liked me – I’d be very surprised to find out he liked anyone but himself and Matt. He certainly didn’t appear to try to do anything but annoy me.

Our laughs petered out and we looked at out books.

“But, seriously, Lizzy’s an idiot.”

“You’re an idiot,” I muttered.

He chuckled, “am I, now?”

I sighed, turning to him. “That’s the problem, Cole, you know you’re not. You’re probably smarter than everyone in our class, but you don’t bother doing anything with it. I like to think I’m smart, but-”

“‘I have always seen a great similarity in the turn of our minds’.” Cole smiled.

“Are you-? Seriously? That has to be one of the most obscure quotes in the whole book.” I couldn’t stop myself laughing again at the absurd enigma that was Cole Fielding.

“You remember it.”

“I’ve read that book a hundred times.”

Cole shrugged. “Are you suggesting I haven’t?”

“I’d be very surprised if you’d read it once, to be honest. Have you?”

He didn’t answer me, only smiled in that infuriatingly handsome way he had and started talking about our essay.

I watched him carefully. Maybe he had read the book, but I doubted it. He probably jumped on Google and tried to find obscure quotes to annoy me with. I could entirely imagine him putting that much effort into aggravating me and not his schoolwork.

 

¢

 

It was getting colder – if that was even possible – and I made the wonderful choice to go for a jog around the park because I legitimately had nothing better to do and way too much pent up energy. It’s a sad day when you have nothing better to do than jog in near freezing temperatures.

As I ran, I watched the little puffs of breath I exhaled – riveting stuff. I’d never really been a big jogger, sport kept me fit enough, and I was beginning to regret my decision to start now – I’d forgotten my music player and just remembered that I considered running along a path with no particular destination the most boring thing in the world.

I slowed as I came up to the big willow, memories of my talk with Cole fresh in my mind. I smiled as I thought about it; things were going all right with Jaime – although we still weren’t quite dating – so my frustration level with Cole had significantly diminished. I could look at the time as something nice without worrying anymore about what it had meant, why he hadn’t turned up the next day, or why his behaviour had reverted back ever since.

As though conjured from memory, Cole stepped onto the path ahead of me and we both stopped dead. My smile fell and I panicked when I saw another bruise on his face. Cole looked ready to bolt, but I’d crossed the distance between us in seconds and had my hand on his cheek.

He chuckled wryly. “At least your hand’s cold enough to be an ice pack.”

“Cole, what happened?” I asked, searching his face.

He leaned into my hand almost by instinct and sighed.

Somehow, I had the feeling he hadn’t just got into a fight with some other kid. I’d seen it happen at school – knew he got into fights out of school – but he’d walked away from those cocky, whether he’d seemed to win or lose. Now, he was hesitant, wary, tired.

I reached up and kissed his cheek gently as he’d done to me, keeping the contact as long as I thought I could get away with. I thought his arms were going around me, but he just pushed me away gently, his face a more arrogant smirk again.

“If I’d known a bruise would get you in my arms, I might have got one earlier.”

I crossed my arms as much in exasperation as against the cold. Cole was dressed much more suitably for the weather, his collar attractively turned up as usual. Not like me in my thin, long-sleeved t-shirt and shorts.

“It’s not the first bruise I’ve seen on you. What happened this time?”

“Some boys thought I was an easier target than I turned out to be.” He grinned, but it didn’t reach his eyes and even I could tell he only intended to rile me up.

Tired of his stupid games, I sighed. “That did not come from a fist fight. You don’t want to tell me fine. Bye.”

I turned to leave but he spoke again.

“How the hell would you know what I get up to?”

I whirled around. “Because I have a fairly good understanding of you, Cole Fielding. If you get into a fistfight, whether you win or lose, you walk around with an untouchable air as though daring someone else to start something. You don’t mope around as though you’re pursued and have nowhere safe to go.”

Cole blinked at me for a moment before his smirk returned with full force. “Of course, because I have hidden depths.”

I rolled my eyes, walking forward to poke him. “You might if you stopped being a jerk long enough.”

“You’re funny, Hannibal. But, no one expects me to amount to anything and I’m more than happy to fall short of expectations.” The bruise only accentuated the fierceness in his face and I nearly missed the hint of bitterness in his voice. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go and do nothing with my life.”

He pushed passed me and headed back down the path. I sighed, hoping it wasn’t just me who’d pissed him off.

He’d left in the direction of my house and part of me didn’t want to go back that way and run into him. Another part of me wanted to show him exactly how much I didn’t care. I rubbed my hands against the cold and started jogging home.

I passed him, studiously ignoring the puff of cigarette smoke I ran through, and headed for home. When I got there, Ben was waiting outside, ruining my chances of a quick getaway inside. I stopped in front of him.

“What?” I breathed out heavily, wrapping my arms around myself.

“Why are you jogging?”

“I jog.”

“Hey Cole,” he called over my shoulder. “And, no you don’t jog.”

“I do, too. What do you want?”

Ben looked at me quizzically. “What? I don’t want anything from you, I was going to meet up with Matt and get some hot chocolate or something.” He looked behind me and I saw Cole was standing a ways off. “Jeez, what happened to his face?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. The great jerk-off said he got into a fight.”

“Another one?” Ben sighed as though he knew all about Cole’s extracurricular activities. I blinked at him.

“I’m sorry, what do you know about what fights Cole does or does not get into? Should I be worried?”

“Matt and I talk, Aura. It’s no big deal.”

“Fine, fine,” I replied.

“I don’t know why you’re so snippy.”

“Time of the month,” I muttered, knowing that would shut him up. I threw another look at Cole and headed inside for a warm shower.

Before I went into the bathroom, I snuck a peek out the window and saw them talking. Cole smiled and laughed a few times as Ben shot looks towards the house. Cole then ruffled Ben’s hair and left.

It wasn’t until I got into the shower that I realised I’d undressed right where someone could easily look up and see me; just as easily as I could look down. I felt my cheeks burn and banged my head against the wall a couple of times.

Think of Jaime, I told myself.

Jaime, who was not some emotional yo-yo and was completely available. And, who was taking me to the Winter Dance in a week.

I was starting to get excited, and any remote thought of Cole flew from my mind quite successfully.