Chapter Four
Gregory’s heart was palpitating incessantly. It felt like it was skipping every other beat the entire train ride to his dorm. He couldn’t believe they were going from mild, confusing flirtation and confusion to this so rapidly. He kept searching himself for uncertainty, wondering if he shouldn’t be more wary about the situation or about jumping into this so fully, so fast, but he couldn’t find either. He felt nervous but only in the best way, and in almost the same way he had felt the first time he had made out with a guy or the first time he had had sex with someone he liked.
He kept glancing at Lionel, trying to gauge his feelings. They were sitting very close together on the vibrating train, not holding hands, but allowing their bodies to touch as if in anticipation of what was to come. Lionel seemed calm and had a small smile on his gorgeous mouth the entire time. They hardly spoke which only gave them both time to overthink things. That, however, did nothing to deter them as they disembarked at Gregory’s uptown stop and walked calmly toward their school’s high-rise dormitory.
Gregory finally conceded that he didn’t feel like he was making the wrong decision and that the only sense of foreboding he was feeling was comically at the lack of foreboding he was feeling. He hadn’t liked someone like this in at least two years, he realized, nor had he ever liked someone this certainly this quickly.
Gregory signed Lionel in at the security desk, feeling momentarily thankful that he didn’t really know anyone at this school, yet. It would only add unnecessary pressure to the situation to pass a bunch of people he knew on their way to his room.
“You okay?” Lionel asked with an almost chuckle, though there was genuine concern in his eyes. Gregory felt his heart melt, feeling like a silly sap. Wilson, who was the biggest romantic Gregory knew, was going to eat every bit of this up when he told him.
“Yeah, just wishing I’d straightened up my room this morning,” Gregory deadpanned and Lionel laughed a little too enthusiastically, revealing his own nerves. “Are you?” Gregory added.
Lionel nodded but swallowed hard. “I may need to…take it slow. It’s the first…you’re the first one since…” he looked down, shaking his head as if ashamed. Automatically, Gregory reached out, placing a reassuring hand on Lionel’s bicep.
“Hey, of course, I totally understand. We don’t have to do anything more than what you’re comfortable with, okay? Promise.”
Lionel’s eyes blazed with gratitude but also attraction. Gregory had less than a moment to recognize it before Lionel’s fantastic lips were on his. The kiss was not forceful, or hungry, or sloppy. It was firm, yes, but out of a confidence that it was what both men wanted in that very moment. It was exploratory in a still way. It wasn’t the absolute start of anything, merely the promise that something would start and that both of them were sure that they wanted it to.
***
Gregory had a vague moment of wishing that they did not attend a “dry school” and that he had beer or something to offer Lionel. In the next moment, however, he decided he was glad they were going to be sober for this. It made it feel so much more real, which was terrifying of course, but good.
“Your room is not dirty.” Lionel sounded almost offended as he said it, making his way confidently to sit on Gregory’s unmade bed.
“I’m sorry?” Gregory responded, shrugging. Lionel chuckled. Gregory stood in the middle of the room momentarily, suddenly nervous once more. There was a chair at his desk, but sitting there did not appeal to him at all. There was an unspoken something in the air, though, that as soon as he sat on the bed beside Lionel something was bound to happen.
“I never make my bed,” Lionel was definitely trying to make conversation and it gave Gregory a sense of relief to know he wasn’t the only one nervous or feeling awkward and trying to rectify the feeling.
“Me neither,” he responded, shifting on his feet and starting to feel stupid. “It doesn’t make sense to me if I’m just going to get back into it later that night.”
“Agreed,” Lionel nodded. He was now smirking at Gregory’s obvious discomfort, standing as if lost in space in the middle of his own room. “You going to stay there the whole time?” he teased.
Gregory sighed, trying to smile but only managing a strained grimace. He couldn’t fathom why he felt so nervous all of the sudden, like he had the night he’d lost his virginity officially. He definitely knew what he was doing so much more than he did then, but there was something about Lionel, their connection, that was causing his breath to come in shallow, anticipatory bursts, and his palms to sweat slightly. His mind felt blank, as well, and he was longing for something witty to say. Finally, he just rolled his eyes at himself, shrugged, and sat about half a foot away from Lionel on the edge of the bed.
In what was somewhat of a relief, it seemed that his apparent nerves were causing Lionel to feel calmer, more in control. He leaned in ever-so-slightly and whispered, with a twinkle in his eyes, “There, that’s not so bad, is it?”
Gregory swallowed and smiled, feeling his head float away with the smell of sandalwood and natural musk that Lionel was emitting. His arousal multiplied.
Gregory’s mind rushed through the events of the last several hours, particularly their conversation about his ex…his very new ex.
“Are you absolutely sure about this?” he asked. He wanted him, wanted him so much in this moment it was becoming painful, but, he didn’t want to be with him if this was some way to get over an ex. He didn’t want to be with someone as a rebound, especially someone he seemed to like so much. That was the definition of drama. “Because I like you,” he felt like he should explain. He had always tried to be as forthcoming as possible, and especially after coming out in high school. “In a way that I don’t need this to happen right now…and in a way that I don’t want it to happen if it’s because of your ex or your breakup. I like you in a way that I wouldn’t want this to be casual. Maybe I should have said this before. I’m sorry,” he shook his head and looked away, feeling vulnerable but proud for speaking his mind. It was better to do it now than after it was too late.
Suddenly he felt Lionel’s hand under his chin, hot and strong, pulling his face to turn, and they were kissing again, a little more actively this time, their lips exploring more fervently, the tension pushing them further than they’d gone in the elevator.
Lionel pulled away, breathing heavily, his eyes heavy-lidded. “I’m sure. I like you, too. I’ve been out of love with…for a long time. It’s hard. It hurts, but honestly, meeting you gave me the last push I needed. I don’t hook up, I don’t like casual. I wouldn’t…I wouldn’t be here with you if I weren’t serious.” His voice was deep, his eyes deeper, and though his heart was now pounding in a way that seemed like it could be audible, Gregory no longer felt nervous, merely excited. And ready.
They were kissing again, their lips opening to one another and exploring, feeling each other. Lionel’s hand moved slowly around to the back of Gregory’s neck, raising goosebumps as it grazed his flesh and his breath deepened, breathing in the moments and scents swirling around them.
Their tongues met, tentatively at first, but only for a moment. Then they were moving and exploring openly, tasting and feeling each other with a burning vigor and Gregory’s hand found its way into the thick hair at the base of Lionel’s neck, at first gently and then more firmly as their kiss deepened. His pleasure increased exponentially as his actions elicited a moan from Lionel, deep and guttural.
The next moment, Lionel was moving their bodies, laying Gregory backwards onto the bed, keeping their mouths interlocked. He straddled Gregory, breaking their kiss to smile down at him playfully before moving his mouth to begin to explore the rest of Gregory’s body. He trailed kisses past his ear and down his neck, adding even more goosebumps across Gregory’s body. As he kissed down toward Gregory’s collarbone his hands were working at the hem of Gregory’s t-shirt, pulling it upward to expose the toned stomach there. Gregory arched, slightly, and helped tear the t-shirt away from his body, Lionel’s lips breaking contact with Gregory’s body for the shortest moment possible. Gregory’s breaths were coming fast and desperate as his arousal grew and grew, each new kiss pushing him closer to the brink.
Lionel trailed kisses down Gregory’s newly exposed torso, nipping playfully at his erect nipples, causing both of them to chuckle and causing Gregory to squirm as he grew closer to losing control of himself. Lionel was also letting his hands explore Gregory’s torso along with his mouth, feeling the taut skin and firm muscles with his sensitive fingertips.
He made his way quickly down to the waist of Gregory’s jeans, and both men were torn between wanting the exploration to continue and wanting the pants to go away. Gregory undid his pants as Lionel continued to kiss and stroke his stomach and chest.
Lionel continued kissing across Gregory’s stomach as he latched his fingers onto the pants and started pulling them down, exposing Gregory’s boxers which were hardly containing his almost fully-erect penis. Lionel smiled as he pulled away to yank the jeans all the way off and toss them somewhere behind him in a cavalier way. Gregory chuckled and then sighed, feeling the fullness of his arousal and both wanting it to be taken care of and wanting to prolong this as much as possible.
He leaned up, supporting himself on his elbows and whispering huskily, “Come here,” which Lionel obeyed readily, straddling him once again and meeting his mouth with an even more passionate and enthusiastic kiss than before.
Lionel could feel Gregory’s bulge against his own and took advantage to grind against it, making them both moan into each other. Gregory, deciding that Lionel was far too dressed still, grasped at the hem of the other man’s t-shirt to signal that he wanted it gone. Lionel smiled into their kiss, pulling his shirt up, breaking away briefly to pull it over his head, and tossing it behind him as he continued their kiss. Gregory stroked Lionel’s chest, feeling the strong pectoral muscles and seeking out the defined shoulders, the likes of which had always been his weakness.
Lionel once again began kissing down Gregory’s torso, though more quickly this time, with goal-oriented speed. He placed a light, playful kiss onto Gregory’s erection through the straining fabric of his boxers before swiftly removing them and tossing them away as well. He felt powerful and erotic, half-dressed and now staring at this gorgeous and naked man. He had not felt this aroused in months, if not longer. His eyes glinted as he took in Gregory’s girth and Gregory forgot to breathe momentarily, lost in the lust in Lionel’s eyes. Lionel made eye-contact and they both licked their lips hungrily.
“May I?” Lionel asked, with the smirk Gregory was already quite fond of.
“Please,” he responded in a low, gravely plea.
Lionel positioned himself on his knees, pulling Gregory down so that he could access him off the side of the bed. He dipped his head and kissed the tip of Gregory’s penis gently before sliding his tongue out and circling the tip, causing Gregory’s hips to thrust involuntarily and a groan to issue from deep in his throat.
Liking the response, Lionel continued to circle his tongue around the head and then moved slowly down the shaft, taking the penis further and further into his mouth, feeling it quiver and feeling Gregory’s leg and torso muscles stiffen as he took him further and further in.
“Oh my God,” Gregory moaned and Lionel glanced up to see his eyes rolling back with pleasure.
He took the penis into his mouth, feeling the tip hit the back of his throat as he reached the base. He brought one hand up to cup Gregory’s balls, massaging them and causing Gregory’s hips to thrust even more. Gregory’s hand found the back of Lionel’s head, his fingers locking into his hair and Lionel moaned his approval. Gregory’s grip tightened and Lionel followed its command, moving his head up and down, sliding his lips along the shaft, swirling his tongue around as he went. He let his moans go freely, knowing how much he enjoyed the feeling of those kinds of vibrations.
After a few minutes, Gregory groaned and lifted up further, saying earnestly, “I want to be inside you.”
Lionel felt like he could have cum just at those words. He pulled off of Gregory’s erection, getting a thrill as Gregory’s eyes rolled back and he sighed, disappointed in the release but clearly ever-so pleased.
“Yes sir,” Lionel responded with a teasing growl as he stood, undoing his pants while keeping steady eye contact. He removed his pants and briefs quickly, pleased by the arousal that darkened Gregory’s eyes as he took in Lionel’s large erection.
“Against the wall,” Gregory ordered, making them both smile. Gregory walked over to his closet and pulled down a bottle of lube that hadn’t been opened. “A going away gift from Wilson,” he answered Lionel’s silent inquiry with an eye-roll. Lionel leaned against the wall with his forearms, spreading his legs and silently congratulating himself on his rigorous workout routine this summer. He knew his ass was in the best shape it ever had been.
Gregory licked his lips, taking in the sight before him as he spread the warming lubricant along his member, which felt ready to explode at any moment. He took a deep breath, doing his best to put off that release, wanting to enjoy this as much and as long as possible. He leaned forward, tossing the bottle onto the bed, and grasping at Lionel’s hips. He kissed the sensitive place between his neck and his shoulder and it was Lionel’s turn to break out into goosebumps. He brought one hand up once more to the back of Lionel’s head, pulling his hair so that his back arched and he thrust his ass into him. He kissed up Lionel’s neck, grazing his teeth against Lionel’s earlobe.
He released Lionel’s hair to grasp his penis, stroking it once more to make sure it was fully lubricated. He pressed his lips into Lionel’s neck as he guided the head of his penis into Lionel's welcoming anus. Both men groaned as he slid further and further into the tight opening.
As he pulled slowly back out, Gregory slid his hand down Lionel’s side and around to the front to grasp Lionel’s erection. His hand still slippery with lubricant, he stroked Lionel as he pumped inside of him, matching the rhythms so that they were both building simultaneously.
Their grunts and groans mingled together as both of their bodies became drenched in sweat, moving together closer and closer to climax.
“Oh fuck!” Lionel yelled after a few moments, his voice ragged with arousal. This set Gregory, too, over the edge, and as he came inside of Lionel, he felt Lionel cum in his hand, their hips jerking and their bodies shuddering, both moaning through their releases.
After a few minutes, Gregory pulled gently out of Lionel and they fell together onto the bed, gripping one another, and falling back into a pattern of kissing and stroking, though this time with less vigor as their bodies fell into the deep relaxation of post-orgasm.
After several long minutes, they moved into a cuddling position, facing each other, Lionel’s head tucked against Gregory’s chest, Gregory’s arms wrapped firmly around him, as both of their hearts pounded and their breathing slowly calmed.
Lionel said something quietly, but it was muffled against Gregory’s chest.
“What?” Gregory asked lazily, his eyes closed.
“I’m glad it was you,” Lionel said again, slightly louder, looking up with watery but happy eyes. Gregory didn’t need clarification because, he realized, he felt exactly the same way.
“I guess that’s your way of saying it was good for you?” he asked, teasingly. Lionel rolled his eyes and nipped playfully at the skin on Gregory’s chest.
Gregory chuckled, hugging Lionel more tightly and sighing contentedly. “I’m glad it was you, too,” he said gently, and though he couldn’t see, he could picture the smile on Lionel’s face.
They fell asleep interlocked and content, both aware that this was just the beginning of something wonderful.