I was staring into space for around the hundredth time that day when someone knocked on my door.

“Come!” I shouted. Alex Clayton walked in and perched himself on the edge of my desk as he always did when he stopped by. He was my manager and mentor and I had the utmost respect for the man, but his intensity could be a little overwhelming. He was around fifteen years my senior and had a real air of superiority about him, and I had yet to see him smile. It was clear today was not going to be the day he chose to break that mould.

“Your latest patient is now in situ on your ward, Kelly. I trust that you’ll wish to see him.”

I leaned back in my chair and linked my fingers together. Oh Alex, you have no idea how much I want to see him… and that’s definitely not a good thing. “Thanks, Alex. How did he seem?” Apart from incredibly hot, dangerous, and masculine… I shook my head in case my train of thought escaped through my mouth.

Folding his arms across his chest, he took a deep breath in through his flared nostrils. “Well, in my opinion I see some aggression there. He likes his colourful language,” he said whilst scrunching his nose as if noticing an acrid odour.

I nodded. “Hmm, I see. Has he asked any questions? Made any comments?” For example, “Is it ethical to take my doctor out on a date?”

“Only that he doesn’t know why he’s here or who he is. But I’m guessing you knew that already.”

“Yes. That’s nothing new. I’ll need to spend some time with him trying to discover who he is. And I’m guessing the police will have a million questions too.”

“Speaking of which, my secretary contacted the police again. She gave them what information we have, and they ran the name though the UK missing persons databases and nothing came up. They’ve contacted the FBI in the US since he awoke and we heard his accent. The Scottish police have been in contact with them too and they ran the name by them, but again… nothing. He’s clearly not missed, which is strange considering the mention of Rosa in the note he had in his possession.”

I sighed, trying to allow the frustration to vacate my body. “It begs the question ‘Is he all that he seems?’ I’ll pop my head in before I go home.” As I said this, my heart did a funny little skip in my chest. Oh no… not good.

Alex stood and made his way to the door. “Okay. But… Kelly, just be careful. There’s something about him. I… can’t quite put my finger on it, and maybe I’m being overly judgemental—I never did like tattoos—but be careful, okay? Don’t spend time alone with him unless absolutely necessary, and make sure you have your personal alarm with you at all times and use it if necessary.”

I smiled and nodded my silent agreement. But his warning words sent a cold chill down my spine. For the past few days—since the incident with Dermott—all I’d wanted to do was be alone with Cameron.

Like my subconscious told me before, not good.

Sooo not good.

I locked my filing cabinets, grabbed my coat and bag and placed my hand at my waist to feel the alarm was still in place. I chewed on my lip for a moment, toying with the idea of taking Alex’s advice; but I never left the building with my alarm and it seemed silly to do so today as I was only popping in briefly on my way out. Deciding that I would simply keep my distance from him and stay by the door, I removed the device and placed it in my desk drawer before locking it. I left my office, closing the door behind me, and with a mixture of excitement and trepidation, I began to walk down the corridor toward Cameron’s room. The closer I got to his room, the more my pulse began to race; I considered going back to retrieve the device. My heart thundered in my chest and I had to breathe slowly to calm my jangling nerves. I decided I was being ridiculous and so I knocked lightly on the door and waited to hear his panties-melting voice.

“Yeah, come in,” he called in that deliciously deep, gravelly, American intonation. Taking one last long breath, I pushed open the door and stepped inside.

“Hello. How’re you feeling today?” I asked with a polite smile.

His mouth curved up at one side slightly and a dimple appeared in his cheek. “I think I’m gonna make a recording of my answer to that damn question… save my energy.” His voice had dropped to a sultry whisper and I swear I felt the vibrations of it travel right down my spine and pulse at my clit. His narrowed eyes locked on me with an intense smoulder and for a moment I was unable to speak. I watched as his gaze left mine, travelled down to my chest and back up. My nipples stood to attention and when his eyes were on mine again his mouth curved up into a full-blown, heart-squeezing, pant-inducing smile. He clearly knew he was affecting me and I felt the heat of arousal rise in my cheeks.

I blinked rapidly and cleared my throat. “Sorry, I’m sure you get asked that hourly.”

Raising his eyebrows, he laughed lightly. “Ya think?”

I began to relax and thoughts of my alarm became a fuzzy ball at the back of mind as I stepped closer. “So, any more memories coming back to you?” He tilted his head to one side and observed my face intently and I involuntarily reached up and touched my hair. After a few silent moments he rubbed at the stubble on his chin and it made a soft scratching noise that I wanted to replicate with my own fingers. I knotted my hands in front of me as butterflies skittered around inside of me. My question hung in the air between us for what felt like ages, and I found myself stepping towards him again. I was standing close beside his bed now, my gaze fixed on his, like a moth drawn to a glowing light. The lack of alarm at my waist heightened my senses; yet any sense of danger I had was of a purely sexual nature.

“Nope.” He eventually huffed sulkily.

After remembering what it was I had asked, I nodded, skimming my gaze over his lips and feeling mine part. “I see. Okay, well, I’m just about to go home for the day, so I’ll pop in and see you tomorrow. Get some rest.”

He grabbed my arm, and I yelped as he yanked me down so that my face was inches from his. Suddenly the fact that my alarm was sitting in my desk drawer was a huge issue. My breathing became fast and ragged in a fight-or-flight manner, my heart leapt, and I swallowed hard. Anxiety spiked within me and I made another strange little squeak of fear. In the back of my mind I was aware that I was making no attempts to pull away. Strangely the only thought on a loop at that moment was that I liked the fact his fingers could circle my wrist completely and that the slight hint of pain would be so easily soothed by his tongue and lips. What the hell is wrong with me? I should be screaming, not squeezing my thighs together for friction. This is crazy. This is not me. Or… or is it?

He growled through clenched teeth, “I’m done resting. I want out of here, sweetheart. You hear me? I need to get out and find out what the fuck is going on. This shit is freaking me out.” His stare penetrated me and I suddenly felt naked as his eyes travelled down to my cleavage. The position I was in gave him a great view. He licked his lips and I tried to breathe steadily.

As calmly as I could I told him, “I suggest you let go of my arm, sir. Or I’ll be forced to call for security.” Damn my voice for coming out so breathy and lustful. This isn’t a game, Kelly.

He slipped his other hand up to my hip and tingles followed in the wake of his touch. He grunted. “Funny, I don’t see that little alarm thing you had yesterday.” He must have noticed my eyes widen as he continued with an evil smirk. “I’m guessing that’s what it is seeing as you’re always checking it’s there. And now it’s not. You know, I could really take advantage of that fact, now couldn’t I?” He gave a dark chuckle and leaned closer still. Closing his eyes for a moment, he inhaled through his nose. Another shiver travelled down my spine as I watched him. I found it strangely erotic that he was inhaling my perfume—and the eager wetness in my panties was equally as disturbing as his actions.

He opened his eyes and whispered, “Fuck, you smell good. I could eat you right up.”

I twisted and pulled my wrist, freeing myself from his grip. “I think you should keep those sorts of opinions and comments to yourself, John Doe,” I replied with a sneer, feeling slightly guilty for the threat implied in using the name given to unidentified dead bodies. But I needed to distance myself from him emotionally. It was insane to allow the thoughts and urges that had been rampaging through me since I met him.

He laughed in that husky gravel of his. “Ouch, so now I’m John Doe, huh?” He shook his head as his expression changed. Regret replaced the malice that had been there only seconds before. “Look, I’m sorry, okay? I really don’t know who the fuck I am.” He rubbed his hands over his bearded face and leaned his head back. When he turned to face me, his features had softened. “Forgive me?” he whispered.

Even though my head was screaming at me to not be so utterly stupid and unprofessional, my insides had turned to jelly either through arousal or fear… or maybe a little of both. I nodded. “Forgiven,” I breathed.

He closed his eyes again. “Thank you. See you tomorrow, Kelly.”

I inhaled sharply. I’d kill Annie for telling him my bloody name.

All through my walk home, the image of his face so close to mine and the masculine scent of his skin whirred around my brain. The vividness of his blue irises shot with the slightest hint of silver that I noticed due to being in such close proximity to him. A mixture of anger and arousal crawled through me, and I shuddered against the cold night air. I should have reported the incident immediately. It was so incredibly reckless of me not to go straight to Alex and confirm that his suspicions were, in fact, correct. But what good would it do my patient? Of course Cameron was angry. I’d feel the same if I awoke in hospital in a foreign country thousands of miles from wherever home was. No… he hadn’t actually harmed me, and as a mental health professional, I recognised that his remorse was genuine; monitoring the situation was the best thing to do. I’d give him the benefit of the doubt… this time.

Once home and through my door, feeling dirty for my misguided fantasies, I rushed to the bathroom, stripped out of my clothes, and turned on the shower. I needed to wash this feeling away. I would have to seriously consider handing him over to another doctor if this continued. My job and potentially my life were on the line, judging by his earlier display of aggressive dominance.

After pulling the tie from my hair, I climbed under the cascade of hot water. Grabbing the shower gel—the fragrance of which my patient was so taken by—I squeezed a generous blob onto my palm and began to wash my tense, aching muscles, kneading as I lathered my skin.

As I rubbed the soap over my body, I thought about the intensity of Cameron’s piercing blue eyes again. The closeness of his face and the way in which he’d grabbed my wrist. As I closed my eyes and grazed my nipples with my palms, desire began to coil deep within me and my hand began to move lower… lower… lower, until my fingers found my dampness and swollen clit. I sighed as I began to tease the flesh there and my breathing rate increased. The more my arousal took over, the faster my fingers worked as images of Cameron’s muscular, tattooed arms sprang into my mind. His large hand around my slender wrist; his jaw clenched and brow furrowed. I tugged at my nipple, imagining it to be his rough fingers, and I was transported back to his room again. Only this time I was underneath him on the bed and he was grasping me with one hand, tugging my sensitive, erect nipple with his lips, swirling his tongue around the taut flesh, and teasing my clit with the other hand as he pushed my thighs apart with the thickness of his own and stared down at me.

Pulling away, he spoke through perfect, white, gritted teeth. “Fuck, you smell good. I could eat you up. But for now I’ll settle for making you come… hard.”

My subconscious had added the last part, but oh my word did it do the job and I cried out as a fierce orgasm ripped through my tightly strung body. Pleasure rocketed throughout every nerve fibre as each muscle clenched and unclenched, pulsating with overwhelming ecstasy.

My legs buckled and I sank to the floor of the shower enclosure.

As I floated back down to earth—back to reality—I removed my fingers, letting the hot water run down between my legs as I rested my head against the cool surface of the tiles. I closed my eyes and was suddenly overcome with professional anger. What the hell is wrong with me? I’m losing my grip. Tears of self-loathing stung at my eyes and I really did begin to question my own sanity.

Cameron was the dangerous unknown and I usually hated the unknown, let alone the element of danger. In fact I feared the unknown with every fibre of my prissy being. Hence the reason that the only person I’d had sex with since uni. was Dermott… from uni! He was safe and I didn’t have to feel emotion. I could just enjoy the release. So why the fuck was I thinking so intimately about this complete stranger who’d apparently tried to take his own life and had intimidated me so easily? This man that I knew nothing about, other than he had an unstable state of mind and a penchant for tattoos and aggression towards women. Hell, even he didn’t know who he was! Stupid, stupid woman.

Once I was dried and dressed in my pyjamas, I opened a bottle of red wine and sat in silence as I drank the deep, blood-red liquid in the hope that it would help me to sleep without any unwanted dreams.

Sadly, the alcohol only seemed to intensify my lust.

Once again I was beneath Cameron in a large bed. His broad, powerful frame loomed over me, but in a strange way I felt safe with him. Adored even. I stared up into those intense but crystal-clear, blue eyes. The most wonderful sensations bloomed from where we were joined and travelled right to the ends of my fingers and toes. His gaze was lust filled and I reached up to touch his cheek. He tilted his face, closed his eyes and sucked my thumb into the warm wetness of his mouth. When his eyes met mine again, there was something more there. It wasn’t only lust I saw. He moved his cock deep within me as his thick, toned arms held his body aloft, caging me in. My nipples brushed the hard planes of his tattooed chest and he bent to suck one into his mouth. He bit down, causing a split second of pain followed by intense pleasure as he soothed me with the tip of his tongue, stroking and teasing the tightened peak. I lifted my legs and locked them around his back as he slid his rigid length in and out of my body with delicious ease, teasing my sensitive, swollen clit until I felt myself tightening around him. He clenched his jaw and made a guttural sound as he began to thrust deeper and harder. I was so aroused and filled with need for him.

Only him.

No words were spoken as the tightening in my core grew more and more intense. I was so close to release…

I sat suddenly. Alone in my own bed. Another damn dream.

My chest was heaving and a sheen of glistening sweat covered my body. The throbbing pulse between my thighs was almost painful, and I squeezed my thighs together in the hope it would subside. Rubbing my hands over my face, I tried to calm my ragged breathing. This was getting ridiculous now. I was clearly becoming obsessed.

There was nothing else for it. I needed to speak to Clara.

Clara was my own therapist. It may sound ridiculous that I should need one, but believe me, even mental health professionals need someone to talk to sometimes. I had been seeing Clara for many years after suffering anxiety in my late teens—it subsequently turned out to be abandonment issues… well, the fact that my dad had fucked off when I was a kid. I went through a very long phase of being unable to trust. In fact, the phase was still hanging around in the background of our conversations. She was a newly qualified therapist back then and she had really helped me. If I trusted anyone, it was her. It seemed only natural to stay in touch with her, considering my chosen profession.

Luckily I had her home number and knew she was a night owl, so I called immediately and made arrangements to see her the following day. Thankfully she was very understanding.

I just had to decide how honest I was going to be.

The following day I walked into Clara’s plush office and plopped down onto the comfy couch. She handed me a coffee and sat opposite me. As always she was impeccably dressed with her ash-blonde hair in a neat chignon. For a woman in her late forties, she looked a lot younger.

“So, Kelly. What was so important that you had to telephone me at half eleven in the evening to make an appointment?” The question was simply inquisitive. She was direct and I liked that I knew where I stood with her. No pretence.

I sighed and shook my head. “I’m so sorry about that, Clara. Really I am.”

She held up her hands. “No apology needed. What I’m trying to get at is that something clearly has you on the run. This isn’t like you, Kelly. So… come on… spill it.”

“Okay… there’s this man…”

“Ah.” She raised her eyebrows and gave me a knowing look.

“It’s not Dermott, before you say anything.”

She held up her hands. “Hey, I’m not here to judge. You know my thoughts on your relationship with him.”

“Hmm. You certainly don’t keep that a secret.”

With a smile, she continued, “So… this man?”

“Yes… this man… There’s this… how can I put it? There’s this attraction between us. Well, at least I get the distinct feeling it’s not entirely one sided. But… It’s not a relationship I can pursue.”

Linking her fingers in her lap, she asked, “Why would that be? Are you putting up barriers again?”

I shook my head and pulled my brows in. “No, it’s not like that this time. It’s…” Trying to explain without explaining too much created a flood of sensation from last night that made me squeeze my thighs together. “Let’s just say it wouldn’t be right.”

“It’s someone from work.”

I knew she meant a colleague, and a lie by omission wasn’t going to help me—but technically it wasn’t a big lie. He was at my place of work, after all. I nodded but couldn’t meet her gaze. She’d see right through me if I did.

“The thing is, I can’t stop thinking about him. I’m even dreaming about him.” Mm, the way he thrust into my welcoming flesh just hours before… in my mind, anyway. I cleared my throat as I felt heat rush to my cheeks. “Quite explicit dreams too.”

She nodded. “And you’re feeling guilty?”

She knew me so well. “Very.”

“Well, Kelly. You’re a healthy, sexual being with certain emotional as well as physical needs. If you’re attracted to this man, maybe it’d be possible to pursue a relationship outside of work but keep things professional inside of work?”

I laughed at her audacity and the future consequences of what, unbeknownst to her, she was suggesting. “Clara! You’re not supposed to encourage such things!”

She raised her hands again in surrender. “Look, I’m saying this as a friend, not your therapist. You’re an intelligent woman, Kelly. I know you could keep your head on straight at work. And if this man makes your sweet button hum, then maybe you need to see where it goes? Like I said, you have needs, hon. We all do.”

My mind flicked back to what my thoughts had done to my ‘sweet button’ the night before, and I shuddered. “It’s… it’s not that simple. And what’s with the sweet button crap? Ugh! Cringe-worthy, Clara.” We both burst into laughter.

“Kelly, I’ve known you for years. I do consider you a friend more than a client—which could be seen as incredibly unprofessional of me—” Oh the irony… “But I have to say I’m in favour of anything that draws you from the unhealthy relationship you have with Dermott. It’s almost as if you’re with him because you’re scared to allow yourself to feel. As if you’re scared to even try with anyone outside of this little comfort zone you’ve created with your fuck buddy. If that’s the case, we really need to address that… or I can refer you on if you wouldn’t feel comfortable chatting to me about it.” I loved the fact that she could be so blunt with me. I wouldn’t have that with anyone else. Being referred was totally out of the question.

“No… no it’s fine. I think… I think maybe you’re right. I… I watched my parents rip each other apart emotionally whilst I was growing up and… the more my mother tried to make it work…” A lump lodged in my tightening throat. “The more my father pulled away. His cheating and leaving just compounded my worries of getting too close to people, I suppose.” I felt tears escape my eyes and trickle down my cheeks. This was not a subject I readily talked about. Not even with Clara.

“Oh, Kelly, honey… I think we have our answer right there.” Her voice was soft and her eyes filled with concern. “Look… I’m taking off my therapist’s hat again for a moment. Listen to me when I tell you this from personal experience. You can’t go through life comparing every man to your father. Some men stick around and are worth the risk. Try to remember that. And someday you’ll meet someone who isn’t unattainable, and you’ll let yourself fall in love. I just wish you would allow yourself to take the risk whilst you’re still young.”

Of course she was right, but my memories of being a ten-year-old girl watching as my dad walked out the door without looking back, never to be seen again, had left me scarred emotionally. I had major trust issues. It was true. So why the hell was I drawn to someone who could potentially test my boundaries to the nth degree? I had no idea.

After spending an hour there, I left Clara’s office with a smile on my face. Hearing myself explain the situation—even though I wasn’t exactly honest—made me realise how stupid I was being. A weight had been lifted from my shoulders, and I walked into work humming to myself and ready to face whatever the day threw at me with renewed vigour.

The infatuation I had been feeling was just that. Infatuation. And as someone qualified in such matters, I knew that obsessing about things or people simply led to heartache and trouble. In that moment I was determined to push my feelings aside. I was his doctor and he needed me. And despite the way he acted around me and the intense sexuality oozing from his every pore, I would resist. I have to. I really, really have to. As I repeated those words like a mantra, I mused as to why something in the back of my mind told me I was trying a little too hard to convince myself.