CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

—Bella—

 

“Isaac, Francesco, Emilio,” I read from the book of baby names while Jax stood by holding his coffee as he listened. He wasn’t responding to me as I said them. He hadn’t been responding to many things the last few days.

“Baby, did you like them?” I pressed my finger into the book holding my page.

His head shifted toward me, his eyes making contact with mine just before he peered down at his watch. “Of course I did, I think they’re all great.” He stood and pressed a kiss to the top of my head.

“What’s bothering you?” I adjusted my position in the armchair looking up to him.

If it weren’t for the deep breath he drew in, I may have never second-guessed his answer of “nothing,” but the deep breath and slight apprehension in his words assured me he worried about something.

“What if it’s a girl?” He pulled a smile to his lips, facing me from the footstool in front of me. “Could be a little girl, and we need a name.” His head tilted, his dark eyes piercing into mine. This’s what Jax did when he wanted to occupy me. There were so many worries, and I felt all of them. If he was feeling stress, I could feel it as well. His touch, kiss, even the way we made love changed.

I stroked my hand over his thigh with slow repetition. “It’s a boy,” I said with a reassured half smile.

“Oh?” he questioned.

I stretched my hand across my growing tummy feeling happiness grow inside of my heart. I knew without a doubt the baby was a boy.

His brow wrinkled while he watched my hands stroke the cotton that lay against my belly. “My mother said she knew I was a boy—” he shrugged “—You could be right.”

I leaned into the armchair finding the page I’d been reading from. I had marked a few names and noted my favorites. “Ennio—” I began, “—favorite of God. I think this is my favorite of them all.” I lifted my eyes, smiling.

His thought had drifted once more.

“Jax? What’s going on?”

He shook his head, “Nothin’. Yeah, I like that name,” he reached out for my shoulders, pulling me into a hug. “I think it’s great.”

“You think I don’t recognize the worry on your face, but I do.” I lay my head against his chest. His heartbeat echoed with perfect rhythm into my ear. I thought at one point I’d never hear that sound again. “When you hide things from me, it only hurts me, Jax. The secrecy doesn’t protect me.” I clutched his T-shirt into my palm.

His hands stroked my head. “Bella, you don’t understand the shit I have to deal with. The tyrants that wish our family harm.” He leaned away, watching as he pressed his palms into my temples. “You’ll never understand what it’s like to be the devil of a man I must be.” I saw something in Jax’s eyes right then, something I didn’t like.

I shook against his embrace. “Because you don’t let me in.”

His eyes softened a moment before releasing me to stand. “Why?”

“Why what?” I stood, following after him as he turned and walked away from me.

Shifting his body toward mine I jumped back. “Why do you have to know every goddamn thing that I’m thinkin’, Bella? Fuck!”

“Maybe I’m selfish. I’m a prisoner, Jax. I’m a victim of this life too.” I was still, calm, and collected, but I was ready to strike at any moment.

“A prisoner? You can leave any fucking time you want. I’ve given you everything. Anything you want you get, but it’s not enough. It’s never enough for you!” he growled.

“Jax, I’m entitled to have it all.” I crossed my arms over my chest.

“Are you fucking kidding me? Entitled? You’re crazy,” he snorted. “Unbelievable!” He walked into the closet shaking his head.

His sudden burst of hostility was more than I could bare. When he was out of my sight, I reached for my bag, slipped on my flats, and left the suite. I was so angry that I couldn’t help the tear that fell from my eye. I wanted to scream maybe even hit him in the chest, but I couldn’t because I loved him to damn much.

“Isabella?” Alessandra approached the corridor. “Are you leaving?” Her silver streaked hair swept into a bun had begun to fall. I tucked a loose strand of it behind her ear and kissed her cheek.

“I just—” I turned in the direction of the stairs, “—need to get out of here for a while.” I drew in a deep breath, letting my eyes fall to the floor this time. When my head rose, she stared with worry. “I’ll be back in time for dinner.” I ended the conversation with a saddened smile, not leaving any chance for her to oppose my decision to leave.

I stepped out of the door quietly; none of my guards were around, and I took the opportunity to leave unnoticed. I wanted to be alone for a little while. Having someone watching my every move twenty-four seven got old. Sometimes I just wanted to be left alone.

I stepped onto the elevator, pressing the parking garage button. I’d drive until I didn’t feel like crying or hitting Jax any longer. When the doors opened to the parking garage, the quiet echoing off of the concrete dungeon and pristine cars rang in my ears. A Rolls-Royce sat parked to the left of the elevator and a Maserati to the left of it, but my car was several steps away. I clutched the handle of my bag in front of me, feeling the bag hit my knees with each step I took.

My life had become one I didn’t want or ask for. Watching our backs as wives of made men wasn’t uncommon. I was used to it being the daughter of Anthony Sagatori, but I saw a few look over their shoulder more than once. And there I was walking through a quiet parking garage a bit scared. Maybe I feared the boogie man would pop out from behind the hundred thousand dollar black Porsche or my black Jag. Perhaps it was just natural order for a woman to become a bit uneasy when she walked alone.

When my door closed, I quickly locked the doors and turned my head looking into an empty backseat. When I was safe and officially alone, I started the car and drove through the secured gate, and then into the street. I hadn’t considered where I might end up, but I had to get away. I knew Jax was stressed, and I knew there wasn’t anything I could do to help him, but I damn well wasn’t going to be yelled at again. I slipped my sunglasses on and pressed my foot to the gas pedal, leaving it all behind if only for a little while.

 

—Jax—

 

I tapped my foot at the edge of the bed, I felt guilty for yelling and taking all my shit out on her. “Damn it!” I buttoned my slacks then slipped the Hermes belt through the loops of my trousers. I folded my jacket into my arm and took a deep breath. I needed to apologize even if it wasn’t my favorite thing to do; it still needed to be done because she didn’t deserve what I’d said. The shit that I was stressed over had everythin’ and nothin’ to do with her and that’s why it was so difficult.

Taking every other step, I descended the staircase shifting my eyes over the corridor for Bella, but she wasn’t there. I slipped into my jacket and straightened my tie in the mirror when Alessandra approached.

“Please tell Bella I’ll be in late.” I watched in the mirror, seeing the vein at my temple throb.

She nodded in the reflection behind me. “When she gets home, I’ll let her know.”

Dominic and Tony entered just as she finished speaking. I narrowed my brows, looking between the two.

“Where’s Bella?”

They both looked at me and then to each other with confusion written all over their faces. They had no idea where my wife had gone.

“Where did she go?” I turned my attention to Alessandra who seemed surprised herself.

She shrugged. “I— I don’t know. I thought you knew she was leaving.”

“No! I didn’t know! She just left and no one was with her?” My attention was directed to the two idiots in front of me.

“Boss.” Dominic approached.

“Find my wife before I ice your fuckin’ asses.”

“Yeah, yeah.” They rushed to the security monitors in my office.

“What did she say?” I narrowed my stare at Alessandra this time.

“That she’d be back before dinner. She didn’t seem like herself, though. It looked as if she was going to cry for a moment.”

Bella doesn’t cry; she rarely shows any emotion where others are concerned. Hell, even I very rarely see the sensitive side of her—if ever.

I slipped my hand inside my pants pocket, retrieving my cell phone, callin’ hers. With one ring her voicemail answered. “It’s Bella, leave a message.”

“Call me back, Isabella!” I tossed the phone to the chair next to me with force.

“Boss, she left in the Jag about twenty minutes ago. She pulled out of the garage heading west.”

“Where would she go?” Alessandra asked while she straightened my tie.

I didn’t know where she would go. I never let her out of the house; she’d pretty much been a prisoner in her own life since I came into it. All I did was bark orders at her and make demands that would make anyone crazy. “Track her car.”

Alessandra gasped, “You can do that?”

I raised a brow. “Of course, I never risk Bella’s safety.”

“Her car is at 7th and Price.” Dominic watched his phone.

“Zest,” Dominic and Tony said in unison.

“I’ll go, you stay and wait. She may come home before I find her,” I demanded of the two knuckleheads that were lucky they still had legs to stand on.

I slipped my jacket on as I left the apartment and exited the floor inside of the elevator. “Pull the car to the front,” I called my guard.

“Yes, Boss.”

I stepped outside through the glass doors of the building and walked to the car where Wyatt stood holding the door for me. I lifted my eyes for a moment seeing another car just across the street— a black limo— not somethin’ uncommon for this area, very common actually. But that wasn’t what caught my eye; it was the blonde that peered over the top of the car just before disappearing inside of it. My eyes had to be betraying me. I shook my head, stepping into my own car, watching as the limo drove away heading in the opposite direction that I would be.

“Everythin’ okay, Boss?”

I blew out a breath. “Bella took off alone, and her car is at Zest.”

“Got it.” The car was balls to the wall in seconds. Unfortunately, our car was quickly slowed to a stop from traffic. “Sorry, Boss.”

“Cut through here.” I pointed.

The car made a sharp right turn bypassing the cars that sat motionless in front of us.

“If you don’t mind me asking, Boss, did you call her? Is she okay?”

I watched my phone waiting impatiently for her to call me back. I’d dialed and redialed her number over and over with no response.

Wyatt watched with curiosity in the rearview waiting for my response, a response I wasn’t going to give.

A siren blared from behind us, catching my attention quickly. It was Chicago’s finest with their lights flashing.

“Boss?”

“Fuck, just what I needed.”

As Wyatt pulled the car to the side of the road, I punched the seat in front of me. I didn’t have time to entertain the fucking cops, but they passed us. It was a huge fucking relief that they were headed somewhere else.

We were two streets away from the restaurant her car was traced at, and I grew more unhinged with every moment I didn’t know if she was safe. My face heated with fury waiting for the last one hundred feet to pass. I didn’t even consider waiting for Wyatt to open my door like I usually would have, instead, I jumped out. The dark wooden door of the restaurant opened quickly with a couple exiting. I moved to the side letting them pass; it was the mayor and his arm candy, who was a well-connected call girl. He didn’t speak to me, and of course, I didn’t waste my time with him as I turned my head entering in after him.

The hostess greeted me as soon as my feet crossed the threshold. “Welcome, how many will be in your party this morning?”

“I’m looking for my wife, Bella Moretti.”

“Oh, is she dining with a party?”

“Alone.”

“I’m sorry, sir, there isn’t a single—woman dining with us at the moment.”

“You mind if I take a look around?”

“Umm.” she watched me hesitant.

“It’s alright, Amber. I promise I’ll be quick.” I said after glancing at her name tag.

“Oh— Okay, sure I suppose that will be fine, but there isn’t anyone here matching that description.”

“Thank you, I’ll be quick.” I entered the dining area seeing only a few groups of people, mostly businessmen and a few couples but no Bella. Her car sat out front, but she wasn’t here. This was the only place I could think of that she’d be.

I ignored the hostess and left through the front door. I stepped out underneath the awning letting my eyes roam the street; it was busy at eleven am. Her Jag was four cars down on the opposite side of the street, windows up.

“Boss?”

“Not in there.”

“Her car is locked. I got in it and didn’t see anythin’, there’s not even a receipt.”

The sun beat down as the day began to warm up. I opened the car door and reached in for my sunglasses and slipped them on, then reached into my pocket for my phone, dialing Bella again.

“Where are you?” I growled into the phone.

“You think someone could’ve taken her?”

“Yeah, I’m beginning to.” I reached back into my pocket for my phone. I had Sal workin’ on somethin’ but this shit took priority over that any fucking day. “Hey,” I said.

“Boss, is that Bella?” Wyatt asked while he pointed to my left on the other side of the road.

“Yeah.” Bella was walking outside with a man holding onto her. “Come on!” I stepped toward her, halting the suburban that came at me, and ran across the street. A man held her arms and her face looked pale. I reached into my jacket, pulled my gun out, and pointed it at his fucking head. Wyatt grabbed him by his arms, pulling him away from Bella. I slipped my gun back into my jacket and punched him in the jaw. Blood slung from his mouth as his head flew back from the impact.

“Jax! What the hell are you doing?”

“Baby, are you okay?” I held her shoulders.

“No, I’m not! This nice man was trying to get me to my car.”

“Boss.” Wyatt held the guy’s wallet in one hand while trying to hold him up with the other. “Russian.”

I snagged the wallet from his hand and glowered at the fucking idiot he held onto. If he was Russian, he was a dead man. “Gusev, that’s definitely Russian.”

“What do you want me to do, Boss?”

“What is this place, Bella? What the hell have you been doing?” She watched me with disdain, but I didn’t give a fuck. She had no business comin’ out here alone.

“Boss?”

I rubbed my chin. “Take care of him, I’ll drive Bella home.” I turned my attention back, reached for her arm, and slipped her into the passenger seat of the Jag. Once I was seated inside, I watched as Wyatt walked the Russian to the car. “Do you know what was about to happen to you?”

She huffed and turned toward her window. “What the hell do you care, Jax?”

“Excuse me?”

Turning to me with hatred in her eyes she said, “I’m sorry, were you not there in the bedroom when you yelled at me? That’s right, I must’ve imagined it all. I want you to know that I can’t live my life like that.” She took in a deep breath.

“Like what? You have everythin’ that you want. Must be a difficult life, Bella.”

“Sarcasm will get you nowhere, Jax.”

“You’re being very difficult, what do you expect?”

Her sharp tone surprised me. “Difficult? Fuck you!”

“That dirty mouth will get you nowhere with me, Bella.”

“Hmm.” She turned her attention to the window again. “Was that guy really a Russian?” I could see her eyes fall.

“Yeah—” In this life you could take no chances, if there was a chance he was Russian then we called him a Russian until we knew different.

“How do you know he’s with the Bratva?”

“I don’t, but Wyatt will deal with that shit. What were you doing here?”

“I was looking at maternity clothes.” Her hands pressed against her swollen belly.

“What the fuck was this guy doing here?” I ducked down seeing the mannequin  in the front window displaying a pregnant woman. “What’s a guy doing at a fuckin’ maternity store? Alone, I mean.”

“I— I don’t know. I started feeling really sick and dizzy. When I went looking for the sales girl, I couldn’t find her. That’s when he approached asking if he could help—” she shrugged “— I asked if he could get me to the car not thinking anything of it.”

“Are you kidding me? I get that you didn’t feel good, but fuck, Bella, have you forgotten who you are and what we’re up against?”

“No, Jax, I don’t know what we’re up against because you don’t tell me anything.”

“’Cause it’s none of your fuckin’ business.” Anger raged inside of me. She fought me on everythin’. I pulled onto the street, fighting to get out of the traffic.

A few minutes passed before she spoke again, “It is my business. I’m not some dumb wife, Jax. I can hold my own pretty damn well, actually. I’m not a porcelain doll. I think I took care of things pretty well when you were in the hospital.” She slipped her aviator sunglasses on.

“You almost got yourself killed—is what you did.”

“Please, if a woman ran things it would all be different.”

“Different?” I laughed. “Did you or did you not bump someone off?” I eyed her as we sat in traffic.

She shrugged. “That’s different, that asshole was in on my kidnapping.” She huffed.

“Baby, you’re right. It is different ‘cause I would’ve cut his fucking balls off and watched him eat ‘em.” I fumed with anger that they hadn’t paid more for what they’d done.

She laid her hand on mine, “Oh trust me, they’ll all get what’s coming to them in due time.” She assured.

“What makes you so sure?”

She shrugged. “Bad guys always lose.”

“We are the bad guys, Bella.”

We continued driving until we reached the penthouse. There was no more conversation the rest of the way home, and when we arrived Bella rode up in the elevator without a word. The silence was killin’ me.

“I don’t want you leaving this house without two guards.” I held up two fingers making sure she understood my statement was final.

She continued with the silent treatment and walked past me when the elevator doors opened.

“Bella,” Tony hissed when we walked inside.

Bella ignored him and headed up the stairs to our room.

Tony, Dominic, and Sal stood in the entryway watching as she disappeared up the stairs. I slipped off my jacket ready to fire all of ‘em. “If she ever—” I loosened my tie. “— leaves this house,” I pulled my gun from its holster, “— alone,” I cocked the gun, “—again,” I aimed it toward Dominic, “— I’ll kill each one of you, one by one.” I released the gun, “— Have I made myself clear?” They each nodded. “Good, I’m glad we understand one another. “ ‘cause when I got to her some Russian fuck was escorting her outside of a baby store.”

“Who was it? Anyone we know?” Sal asked.

I shook my head, “I’ve never seen him before, but Wyatt is taking care of it. Go give him a hand, will ya?” I said with annoyance before  he quickly nodded and disappeared out the door. “As for you two worthless fucks, Bella loves you, so I won't cut your dicks off just yet, but let me assure you I won’t hesitate next time.” I disappeared into my office.

Now that Bella was safe there was another matter, a ghost I needed to see about.