Chapter 31

Allen

I checked the lasagna cooling on the counter when I heard the doorbell. I washed my hands and pressed my gray slacks down before walking over to get it. I swung the door open and gazed at Nicole in her clingy green dress as she looked past me into the house.

“You look amazing,” I said while I reached out a hand to her.

“Thank you.” Nicole sounded shy as I tilted my head at her with a curious gaze. I could see the fear in her eyes, and she pressed her plum lips together and met my eyes for a fleeting second.

“Would you like to come in?” I asked her, moving aside so she could pass me. Nicole glanced behind me and walked inside, pausing once she was in the foyer to look at me. It was as if she’d never been here before, and I wasn’t sure what to do. “I made lasagna. My mom’s recipe. We can eat at the table in the dining room or while watching something on the couch. It’s up to you.”

“The table sounds great. Do you have wine?” Nicole asked, and I smiled. That’s the girl I knew. She wasn’t chatty like usual, and I needed her to be. I was going to pour my soul out to her tonight, and this version of Nicole wouldn’t appreciate that.

I reminded myself that she’d been through something horrible. When Nicole needed me the most, I walked away from her, and she had every right to have a few walls up. I was going to tell her everything I was feeling and maybe knock a wall or two down until she was willing to hear me out.

“Of course, I have wine. What kind of man would I be if I didn’t have wine for you?” I followed her to the kitchen, watching the sway of her hips as my cock ached for her. I still felt the guilt from her ordeal, but I’d reasoned with myself through a lot of thought and talks with Brandon once he stopped being pissed off at me. I watched her stand awkwardly at the breakfast bar as she watched me plate the main dish along with some salad and sourdough bread. I took them both to the table while she watched quietly, returning to pour some wine and bring it back as I looked at her. “Are you okay?”

“I don’t know what to do or say,” Nicole replied with a frown. “I’ve never done any of this.”

“Can I kiss you to break the ice?” I asked, and her eyes widened while she nodded ever so slightly. “I missed you, Nicole. Without any doubt, I can tell you that.”

I pressed my lips to her soft cheek. She inhaled deeply, her breath catching. I held the chair for her to sit down in front of one of the plates. Nicole sat down as she looked at everything, including the candles that I lit for the occasion. I sat down beside her.

“I know how to do romance. I don’t use that skill often and in fact, I haven’t before you. I never wanted to keep anybody the way I do you.” I held up my glass, and she stared at me. “A toast to a new start?”

“Yeah, that sounds nice.” Nicole let out a breath and picked up her own glass, clinking it against mine. She sipped it and laughed as she set it down. “I probably shouldn’t be drinking this with the pain meds I’m on.”

“Will it be okay?” I asked her, trying to remember the effects of alcohol with medicine. I thought that antibiotics might be worse but she just shrugged.

“Yeah. It’s no big deal. I feel a lot better.” She set the glass down and picked up her fork to stab the salad, taking a bite. “You said this is your mom’s recipe?”

“It was always my favorite.” I smiled at the memories of childhood, and she watched me with a smile on her face. She took a bite of the lasagna and chewed thoughtfully before she laughed.

“This is good,” Nicole said.

I smiled. She seemed to be relaxing a little bit, and I dug into my food as I thought about what to say to her. I’d practiced it so many times in my mind over the weekend and it was easier then.

“So, you’re feeling better?” I asked her as she smiled and nodded.

“I’ve taken a few bubble baths and rested. It’s hard for me to have Noelle taking care of me, but I know she’s enjoying it.” Nicole looked at me. “Brandon has been great.”

“He’s a good guy underneath it all.” I glanced at my plate. “I think he has a thing for your sister as well.”

“It’s cute,” she said as she smiled. “It makes me miss you, though.”

“I’m right here,” I assured her when she met my gaze. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“You walked out on me,” Nicole said as she tore a piece from the bread. “You broke my heart.”

“I know,” I replied, shaking my head and reaching out to touch her arm. “I was scared, Nicole. I felt like I got you kidnapped to begin with. I felt like I couldn’t keep you safe.”

“He was going to get me. You can’t protect me every second of the day, Allen. The important thing is that you saved me. You brought me home.” Her voice was soft as she stared at me, appreciation filling her eyes.

“It isn’t just Ricky. It’s my job.” I stared at her. “I put everyone in my life in danger by association. I bust the wrong guy and he sends a buddy to watch me, and they see everything that I value. They can take it away from me if there is enough anger. I have always worried about that and kept people at arm’s length in the past. Brandon is my closest friend, and he works with me, so we’re equals. The idea of putting you in danger scares me, but I can’t stay away from you.”

“I have never held that against you. I accepted that,” Nicole told me, and I nodded.

“I guess those are just my walls. I want to protect everyone and I love my job. I can’t give that up and prior to now, I was willing to walk away from everybody for it. Things change. Now I want both; you and the job. I just need to find the balance.” I swallowed and licked my lips. I took a bite of lasagna and chewed it slowly as I pondered my next words.

“I have no idea how to find the balance,” Nicole admitted as she blushed.

“We’ll learn together,” I spoke softly.

She looked at me and smiled, playing with the food on her plate. We ate a little more and a more comfortable silence filled the room, making me feel like we were getting somewhere.

We talked about the city and mostly the strip. Nicole hadn’t spent too much time on it, and I told her we’d make a night of it soon. There were some great places to eat, shows, and things for new residents to see. I told her we could make it a double date with Brandon and Noelle and she smiled at me as she took another sip of her wine. I could tell she wasn’t drinking it quickly and assumed that she wanted to keep her wits about her.

A selfish part of me hoped she wanted me as much as I wanted her. I knew this wasn’t about sex and more about love and building a future, but a few days without her was too much to take. I loved her.

I noticed her take her plate to the kitchen, cleaning it off in the trash before she took it to the sink. “Nicole.”

She looked up at me, and I abandoned my own plate as I stood and walked over to her.

“What, Allen?” I stopped in front of her and cupped her face gently as I took in the fading bruises. I accepted now they were not my fault and simply appreciated that she was alive.

“I love you,” I whispered. Her eyes widened, and she dropped the plate in the stainless-steel sink.

“Say that again.” Her voice was low and urgent as I stroked her cheeks with my thumbs.

“I love you,” I repeated as she sucked in her breath and slipped her arms around my neck. “I love you and I’m sorry for leaving you. I never want to be without you again.”

“I love you,” Nicole told me as she pulled me against her and let out a cry. “I thought I’d get over it, your leaving. But it hurt more every day and I didn’t know what to do.” I slipped one hand from her face, wrapping it around her lower back as I held her to me.

This felt right, and I closed my eyes and breathed her in. I had no idea where we would go from here, but I had her with me and that was what mattered. We would fight again and make up, and I breathed in as I felt her pull back and crush her lips to mine.

The dinner was forgotten and the dishes left spread out around the house as I pushed her against the counter. Her lips were hungry and more than that, trusting. She was giving herself to me all over again as I tugged her closer to me, sliding my tongue into her mouth. I vowed to not fuck things up again, and I tilted my head to deepen the kiss.

We turned, and she pushed me against the counter, making me groan as her body brushed against my hard cock. Our lips crashed together as we kissed, teeth clicking and moans of pain and pleasure filling the room. I’d never been this out of control with a woman prior to now, and I slipped my hands down to cup her ass as I pulled her against me.

Last time I was with her, I was looking at it as a goodbye but this was a fresh start. This was my life, and I lifted her to the counter as she moaned against me. I wasn’t going to let her go again and Nicole wrapped her legs around me as I remembered her injuries.

“Is this okay?” I asked.

“It’s so worth it.” She giggled and nodded.

I kissed her again, dragging my tongue against hers until she was breathless before kissing down her jaw to her neck. She tasted so good, and I nibbled at her as I checked her skin in the light to make sure that I wasn’t hurting her. I made slow work of worshiping her skin. There was no rush tonight, and I needed her to know what she meant to me. I found her lips again and kissed her hungrily, memorizing the feeling of being with a woman I loved. It was so different, and I pressed my mouth harder against hers.

She stopped for a second. “I missed you,” she said, pulling me closer with her entire body.

I kissed her face, moving down to suck the soft skin of her neck slowly as she moaned.

“I missed you,” I assured her as I raised one hand to cup her breast, squeezing gently. “You’re it for me, Nicole.”

We kept kissing, and I found her hard nipple and pulled it softly as she dropped her head back. I knew that she was wet for me, and I slipped my free hand down to slide her skirt up as Nicole opened her eyes to look at me, raising her head.

“This is a first for me,” I said staring into her bright green eyes.

“What do you mean?” Nicole asked raising her eyebrows as I kissed her again, making her whimper against me.

“I’ve never made love to anyone before,” I confessed, and she blushed and smiled.

“I’m honored to be the one you get to experience this with,” Nicole told me before she kissed me again, her tongue dancing with mine.