Chapter 36

Tessa

 

 

My morning went from fabulous to completely fucked in a matter of seconds. I had left Ian’s house early to go home, shower, and change before heading to school. I had hoped the storm would turn around and force the school to close another day, but luck was not on my side.

When I got out of the shower, I had missed a call from Ian and the administrator’s office. I checked my voicemail, heart racing, and fearing the worst, only to have it confirmed. I had to meet Dean Scribbs in thirty minutes.

Shit!

I scrambled to find something that looked professional and was not in the least bit promiscuous. I was sure she was going to ask me if there was anything going on between Ian and me, which I would promptly deny. Problem solved.

When I strolled into the admin office about thirty seconds before nine, I knew something was up. The secretary and her student assistant were staring at me with strange but knowing looks. I hadn’t had time to call Ian back. I had barely managed to get here on time. I would call him as soon as I was done and apologize for missing his class this morning.

“Hi,” I said, walking up to the tall desk. “I’m here to see Dean Scribbs. I have an appointment at nine.”

The woman made a big show of looking at the clock before smirking. “She’s expecting you. Go right in.”

I considered saying something rude but held my tongue. I didn’t need to make my situation any worse than it was.

I knocked on the door. “Dean Scribbs, its Tessa McShane,” I said pushing it open.

“Good morning,” she said, standing, but not smiling. “Take a seat, please.”

I closed the door. I knew what was coming and wasn’t eager to have my shame and humiliation broadcast to the entire administration office.

I sat down, waiting to hear the words that would paint that giant scarlet A on my chest.

“Miss McShane,” she started, pulling out a file from under a stack of papers, “this is to inform you that you have been expelled from our institution, effective immediately.”

“Excuse me?”

“Don’t play coy, Miss McShane. Your relationship with a certain professor is not only inappropriate, but it violates our code of conduct rules. Expulsion is the consequence for openly and willingly going against a very basic rule,” she explained, in a high-pitched voice that felt like nails on a chalkboard.

“I don’t believe I did anything of the sort.”

She handed me the file. I opened it to see my expulsion paperwork. For reason, it listed a sexual relationship with one of my teachers.

“I’m sorry, but where is your proof?” I asked, not quite ready to admit to anything.

Her thin lips spread wide. “I don’t need proof.”

“Uh, I think you do. And, if you are suggesting my relationship with Professor Dunlap is inappropriate and violates your code of conduct, please show me where it states that in your rule book.” I sat back in my chair. “I’ll wait.”

She quickly highlighted a section on a piece of paper that had been included with my file. “Read it for yourself.”

I quickly scanned it. “I see you have outlined a section that forbids a relationship between a student and a professor. He is not my professor, and I am not one of his students. Therefore, your claims are invalid. I will not be expelled.”

“Yes, you are. It’s already done. Look at the paperwork, dear. You are no longer a student at this institution. Because the expulsion happened after the free add/drop week, you will not be receiving a refund on your tuition for the semester.”

I looked at her with rage and shock. “Are you fucking kidding me?” I said a little too loud. I was losing my cool. “Seriously? Your stupid little rule book says nothing about an assistant and a professor. I am NOT his student. This rule you are basing an expulsion on does not apply. Read it!” I shouted.

She smirked. It was a cold, ruthless contortion of her face that made me want to slap her. She was a cow. I decided at that moment that I hated her.

“I think you fail to see the point. It’s done. Get out.”

I shook my head, standing so I could stare down at her. “It isn’t done. It’s just starting. You will not steal my money nor my degree. You don’t have that kind of power.”

Another smirk followed by a shrug. “Actually, I do. Leave before I have security escort you off campus. Save yourself from any further embarrassment and go quietly. I think you have sullied your reputation enough.”

“What is your problem with me?” I asked, unable to believe how unprofessional the dean was acting towards me. She was acting more like a jealous girlfriend than a woman of a mature age in a position of authority.

She stood, raised her chin, her crow’s feet becoming more defined with her sneer. “I loathe women who seek to better their odds of success by bedding down with any man. It is deplorable. I would have thought in this day and age you young ladies would seek to better yourself with your minds—not your bodies.”

I had to laugh. The woman had no idea. She probably hadn’t been laid since sometime in the early sixties.

“This isn’t over, Dean Scribbs,” I said, walking out the door, refusing to show any shame. I wasn’t proud of my actions, but I was certainly not ashamed of myself. He wasn’t my professor, and I stood to gain nothing by going to bed with him.

I made my way to my car. I felt numb. I had sensed it was coming, but I never fully grasped what it meant. What it would mean for my future? My mom wasn’t wealthy and certainly couldn’t afford to pay for a full year of school. We only had another semester to pay for, and now, the dean was keeping the tuition, and I wouldn’t get the credits I’d paid for.

Did I dare call Ian? Not yet. I may say something I regret. This isn’t his fault. I pursued him. I showed up at his house. While I knew that, I still was feeling a little pissed. Home first, furious cleaning, and then I’ll call him.

I slammed my brakes on in the driveway, nearly careening into the house. The more I thought about everything, the madder I got.

When the phone rang, I considered tossing the phone into the wall. I checked the screen first; it was Ian.

“Hello,” I muttered, trying not to seethe.

“Tessa! Are you okay? Did the dean talk to you?”

I groaned. “Yes, she did. I take it she talked with you as well?”

“What did she say?” he asked in a low voice.

I took a deep breath. I didn’t want to tell him. I knew he would feel terrible. Then I realized his fate was probably far worse.

“Oh no! Did she fire you?” I asked, suddenly feeling guilty. He had a lot more to lose than I did. Kind of.

He cleared his throat. “No.”

“Oh, thank God. So, are you suspended or what? What happened?”

“She sent me home for the day.”

I blinked. I must not have heard him correctly. “What?”

“I was sent home for the day, and she rescinded the offer for me to return next year,” he said in a low voice, laden with guilt.

I had to take a minute. My head was spinning out of control.

“You know, I need to go. I, uh, I have to finish washing the dishes,” I stammered. “I’ll talk to you later.

“Tessa, wait—”

I hung up. My eyes were burning, and I felt betrayed from every direction. My world had been turned upside down and inside out, and he was given the day off? I was sure it would be a paid day off, too. How backasswards was that? I lose everything, and he loses a day of teaching. A half day at that! So much for equality and all that other women’s lib crap.

It was bullshit and incited my anger even more. I needed to plot my revenge or at least my way back in. I had to graduate. I can’t imagine the past four years going up in flames over a few rounds of sex. I was filled with anger to the point I couldn’t sit still. I turned on the speaker, pulled up my angry playlist, and cranked it as high as it would go. I grabbed the cleaning supplies, dropped to my knees, and scrubbed the kitchen floor with a small brush.

By the time I was finished, I felt a little more relaxed but still pissed as hell. The old tile floor had never looked better. I could eat off of it—or? Despite everything, I was still thinking of where to have sex with Ian next. We’d always been at his house. Now that I wasn’t a student, we could fuck anywhere and everywhere.

Wow. Where did that come from?

He obviously had me under a spell. That was the only explanation.

The scrubbing had been cathartic, but now I needed to put away the rubber gloves and figure out my next move. I yanked open the freezer and nearly jumped for joy when I found a pint of Ben and Jerry’s Rocky Road. Apparently, there was a God, and he had abandoned me, but at least the ice cream fairy hadn’t let me down.

Maria was calling my phone. I didn’t want to answer. I was feeling humiliated. She obviously knew by now what had happened.

“Hello,” I finally picked up the phone.

“Oh. My. God. You have got to be shitting me!” she yelled. “Why didn’t you call me?”

I blinked back tears. Hearing her confirm what my brain had been trying to push away and deny made it all too real.

“Sorry,” I mumbled around a mouthful of ice cream.

“Bullshit. Are you home?”

“Yes.”

“Have you talked to Ian?” she asked.

“Kind of,” I said, trying to fight down the anger that was bubbling to the surface.

“Did he get fired? Jake said he didn’t, but that doesn’t make sense. Are you sure you’re actually expelled?”

Since I hadn’t told her I was, I knew the information had come from Ian to Jake. Everyone was going to know.

“No, he didn’t get fired. He was told to take the day off,” I said, sarcasm dripping from every word.

I heard a small scream followed by a string of curse words that would have made a trucker blush.

“We are going to scheme and plot and come up with a way to make that bitch pay,” she said in a menacing voice.

I had to laugh. “This isn’t Gossip Girl, and we don’t know the first thing about scheming. I do want to make her cry a little though. When will you be home?”

“I’ll be there in fifteen minutes—with more ice cream,” she said, knowing me well.

“What am I going to do?” I sobbed.

“We’ll figure something out, hon. Remember, I’m dating a badass lawyer who just happens to have a vested interest in all of this. Relax, finish that pint, and I’ll bring more, plus some alcohol,” she said in a gentle, mothering voice.

She hung up, and all I could think about was my mom. She would be so disappointed. This would crush her. I was her last hope for graduating from college and really doing something with my life. She had worked so hard all those years, only to lose Talia too soon and to have me fail just before the finish line.