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Free to Breathe by Tracey Jerald (43)

Corinna

Two nights before surgery

“I don’t know why I can’t go home to get ready for a date with my boyfriend,” I grumble to my sisters. We’ve all gathered at Emily’s house because Em got a burr up her ass and wants to play dress up. “Especially one that starts at two o’clock in the afternoon.”

“Listen, your idea of dressing up typically involves a new pair of Chucks and clean jeans,” Em retorts as she makes her way into her closet, calling over her shoulder, “I want you to drop Colby to his knees.”

With a secret smile, I open my mouth to reply, but Ali beats me to it. “Jesus, if that look is anything to go by, he’s on his knees quite a bit.”

We all crack up laughing. Shrugging, I let the teasing go. Why deny something that’s entirely true?

Holly runs her fingers through the close cut of my hair. “I’m still not used to it.”

Cassidy sits down next to me on Em’s bed. Reaching for my hand, she gives it a quick squeeze. “It suits you though. Sexy and sassy.”

Fingering the front of my bangs, I admit, “I don’t know why I didn’t do this years ago. It’s so much easier to take care of.”

Em walks out of her closet, her arms laden with dresses. Hoisting them onto the bed behind us, she commands, “Strip.”

Innocently I ask, “But there’s no music. Besides, that’s Ali’s thing. She’s the one who took classes.”

Ali rolls her eyes. “I took pole dancing classes to strengthen my core.”

“Bet you’re getting use out of them these days.” I wink.

A dazzling smile lights her face. “True.”

Cassidy slaps her hands over her mouth to stop the guffaws.

Em blows a puff of air upward to dislodge the stuck hair on her forehead. “Okay. I’ve narrowed this down to four choices. Let’s figure out what you’re wearing so we can get the rest of you ready.”

I groan. “Tell me one of them is long. This not shaving my legs crap is killing me.”

My sisters all laugh. “I would think not being able to shave there”—Holly makes a circle indicating my sex—“would be worse.”

“I feel like Colby has to shave more often so only one of us is sporting a five-o’clock shadow,” I say dryly. Screaming laughter echoes around the room. “Seriously, I’m afraid of creating a knot with our genital hair when we’re having sex.”

Ali falls to the floor screeching. Em is leaning against her dresser for support. Cassidy slides backward onto the bed and lands on the dresses, while Holly rips out her cell phone muttering, “I wish I got that on video.”

That sends us into another round of fits.

When we finally finish laughing, Em pulls a short red number from the pile Cassidy has rolled all over. “I guess this one’s out of the running. Just in case the wind blows the skirt up.”

Even as Em goes to hang the dress, Cassidy, Ali, Holly, and I lose it again.

Okay, I might not have needed help getting ready for a date, but this right here defines my meaning of sisterhood. Sharing the good times and the bad with unasked support and incredible laughter.

* * *

A few hours later, even I’m surprised by the transformation. Em’s miracle closet yielded the most perfect dress: a strapless magenta silk dress with a pleated front detail that dips lower in the back. The bust line is something I’ve never seen before. It had an almost V cut down to the A-line seam. The material of dress seems to loop through the base, offering modesty, yet still drawing your eye.

Paired with a pair of black patent leather Louboutins, a set of dangling jet-black earrings, and a chunky onyx ring, I feel glamorous. Even the thigh-high tights I’m wearing to hide my leg hair don’t detract from the look.

“Wow,” I whisper as I look at my transformation. “I’ve never looked as beautiful as I do right now.”

“You’ve always been this beautiful,” Em counters.

Cassidy chimes in. “I agree. You’re just giving yourself permission to feel it.”

I twirl. I mean, how can I not? The delicate material of the dress lifts lightly before settling perfectly back in place. “Ali? Holly? What do you think?”

Ali places her hands on my shoulders from behind. “Perfect. Especially the heart that beats inside.”

Holly comes up next to me and takes my hand. “Then again, you always were.”

Quickly I’m embraced by each of my sisters, all taking care not to wrinkle the delicate dress. With just a moment left to myself before Colby arrives, I face the mirror one last time, catching a glimpse of my amaryllis tattoo tucked away next to my heart. It rises and falls with every breath I take. Spinning, I see my key tattoo with my reminder to never forget displayed brazenly on my back.

I’ll never forget.

Not a single minute.

Leaving Em’s room, I make my way downstairs to wait with my sisters for Colby’s arrival.

* * *

“You take my breath away.”

I duck my head, thrown off by the compliment. This man has seen every square inch of my body naked, taken it to places no one ever has, and with mere words can devastate me.

“You’re always beautiful, Corinna,” Colby continues. “But right now, I’m fighting for air.”

“Now you’re just being sweet,” I admonish him.

“Cupping the side of my face, he captures my hand and lifts it to his lips, murmuring, “No, I’m not.”. Lifting it to his lips, he murmurs, “No, I’m not.” Clearing his throat, he says to our rapt audience, “Thank you for everything.”

Em speaks for everyone. “It was entirely our pleasure.”

Phil, who came over to see my sisters’ handiwork, deadpans, “What time will you have her home?”

Colby casts him a disparaging glance. “You’ll see her sometime tomorrow.”

“But doesn’t she have to go to the—”

“Shut up, Phil!” all my sisters snap, cutting him off from interrupting our night of fantasy with the intrusion of reality.

Tucking my hand in his arm, Colby guides me down Em’s front stairs. I’m so engrossed in him, in the magical bubble encasing us, I don’t realize it’s not Colby’s Jeep waiting to take us to where we’re going.

A gentleman is standing by a shiny black car with tinted windows, holding the door open. “Ms. Freeman? Mr. Hunt? Are you ready to begin your evening?”

I turn to Colby. “What on earth are we doing?”

He smiles down at me. “We’re going on an adventure, princess. Come on.” He urges me forward. “It takes a bit of time to get there.”

I smile back as I step forward and accept the driver’s hand. “Thank you so much.”

“My pleasure, miss. Sir.” He nods respectfully at Colby, who walks around the back of the car and slides in next to me.

Once we’re on our way, I pester Colby with questions. “Give me a hint.”

He just shakes his head, laughing. “Not a chance.”

Leaning forward to brush my lips against his, I whisper, “Please?”

He returns my kiss, turning my insides out and making me forget my own name within minutes. By the time I remember my name, we’re on I-84 eastbound and Colby’s plying me with nonalcoholic champagne, strawberries, and cheese to distract me from looking out the tinted windows.

Otherwise, I’d have known where we were going in a heartbeat.

* * *

Two hours later, we’re pulling up in front of a building. I’m stiff from sitting so long. Colby places his hand on my arm. “Before you jump out, I want to talk with you.”

“Okay,” I say slowly, reclining back in my seat.

“It started here for me, right outside this door in a room on the third floor. A girl with incredibly long hair and a shy smile walked into the room, and I felt the punch right here.” He lays his hand on his stomach.

My pulse quickens. I start to look out the window, but Colby snags my chin with one hand. “The more time I spent with that girl, the punch moved from here to here.” He takes my hand and puts it over his heart.

“I want to build new memories tonight over the ones that were so tainted, Corinna. I want to go upstairs and be with the woman I loved then, the woman I never stopped loving, the woman I love now, and erase the final ghosts from our pasts before we move on to our future.” He releases me so suddenly my body flounders a bit. “I want to dance with you in a room where we laughed until we cried. I want to hold you where you trusted me with your deepest secrets. I want to love your body where I dreamed of touching every inch of it with mine. And then I want to do it all over again.”

I sure as hell hope Em used waterproof makeup as my eyes are leaking so many tears, I can’t catch them all. I can’t respond verbally because of the lump in my throat. So, I do the next best thing.

I launch myself at him.

“I love you,” I sob. “I love you so much.”

“That,” he murmurs into my neck, “is just how I feel about you.”

After holding me for a few more moments, he shifts. “The surprises aren’t over.” Colby leans forward to rap on the window. The driver turns off the vehicle. Coming around to Colby’s side, the driver waits for him to slide out before offering me a hand. Stepping onto the sidewalk, I look up at my old off-campus apartment with a mixture of fondness and amazement.

“Come on, baby. Let’s go inside.”

Tucking my hand back into his arm, he escorts me in.

I am in no way prepared for what I see next.

“Oh my God.”

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