Sportscast: Load the Bases
Commentators: Mike and Terry
National televised sports program
MLB First-Year Player Draft
June 7th
Mike: Last night was what die-hard baseball fans dream of. We're talking about the first night of the MLB First-Year Player Draft and all I can say is the draft has started with some predictable picks along with, well, some choices straight out of left field.
Terry: That's right, Mike. I'm still sitting here wondering what the Kansas Club was thinking with their pick of high school third-baseman Grier Miller. He's got the potential to be a great player but he's young, cocky, and has a less than flattering reputation. He needs to gain maturity and grow a little body hair before he can play up in the big leagues. He just graduated high school and I think some time at the college level would have done him some good.
Mike: I was shocked by that pick by Kansas, too. I'm sure Kansas has some plan up their sleeves but right now it's unclear what they were thinking grabbing someone so raw as their first pick. Although, I do love it when a club can pick a player and shock the sports industry at the same time. I think this pick by Kansas might come back to kick them in the ass. Only time will tell. It will be exciting to see if he gets any playing time when they start him out on their Minor League baseball team.
Terry: There were so many other ways Kansas could have gone but a part of me hopes Grier hits his first season out of the park.
Mike: Enough about Grier Miller. I think what all our viewers want to hear about is how the Dodgers swept in and stole the Yankees' number one choice away from them. The Dodgers had the first overall draft pick, and boy, did they grab one of the hottest young players out there. Who would have thought we'd be calling the Dodgers lucky for having the worst record last season in the MLB?
Terry: Leviticus Bryant is not just one of the hottest players to hit the draft. He is the number one college prospect in America. The Dodgers were able to open the draft by selecting ASU pitcher Leviticus Bryant as the first overall draft pick. It's no secret the Yankees have had their eyes on him since he was a freshman and pitched that no-hitter against Oregon. I'm sure the Yankees aren't taking the loss of their golden pick very well in the clubhouse.
Mike: It's not just the clubhouse. There were already bootleg jerseys out on the streets of New York with Bryant's name on the back. It's a disappointing night for fans. The bleacher creatures are sure to call out of work tomorrow in mourning. Let's talk numbers here for a moment so we can really grasp what the Dodgers just achieved by snatching Leviticus Bryant. His batting average is .385.
Terry: Pretty damn good for a twenty-one-year-old pitcher, but let's be honest, his batting average isn't the top in the nation for division one baseball, and once he starts playing in the Majors we'll see his batting average drop. He was also one of the slowest runners on his ASU team. The boy wouldn't be able to steal a pack of gum from a drug store, let alone a base.
Mike: He doesn't need to be fast. No one gives a crap if a pitcher can run. Nine times out of ten they have a pinch runner come in for him anyway. He's there to pitch and with a fastball that clocks in at an average of ninety-nine miles per hour, I think it's clear why the Dodgers picked him. He just finished his junior year and in the last game of the season he had two fastballs clock in at triple digits. That's outrageous. Can you imagine what he'll be pitching after a few years in the right club? I can't believe I'm even saying this right now, but this kid could go down as one of the greatest pitchers to ever play the game. I could see him up there with Roger Clemens, Satchel Paige, and Pedro Martinez.
Terry: Let's not get ahead of ourselves. Bryant has potential but we'll have to wait and see what he does once he's wearing that Dodger blue. The Dodgers will probably have him play a few games on their Minor League team and then pull him up to the Majors as quickly as possible. He was drafted by arguably one of the best clubs in the league so the possibilities are endless. I think we'll get our first good look at what he'll bring to the Dodgers at spring training next year. I'm excited, though. I just love the way he plays with the strike zone. Even the umps get confused. I was able to attend a few of his games this past season and he pinches the corners better than any pitcher I've seen in years.
Mike: I'm telling you, the Dodgers have had their eyes on Bryant for a while. They like him a lot and to steal him away from the Yankees has got to be icing on the Dodger blue cake.
Terry: Now, if only Bryant could steal a base or two. If I were the Dodgers I'd have him running sprint drills before every practice.
Mike: You got to get off this, Terry. The kid doesn't need to know how to steal a damn base. Besides, he's too busy stealing the hearts of women everywhere. You should see our twitter feed right now. We started talking about Leviticus Bryant five minutes ago. FIVE MINUTES AGO!!! The traffic on our twitter feed is now dominated with posts from teens and women of all ages.
Terry: Let's face it, Mike. He probably gets just as much action off the field as he does on it. We all know his ASU teammate, Max Creaton, loves to play the field.
Mike: There's an abundance of leaked photos online to prove it. I thought Creaton's bad boy reputation might be a source of worry for some of these clubs, but the Mets drafted him tonight so they must be confident they can tame his partying ways.
Mike: Good luck with that. Creaton parties too much and Bryant's squeaky clean. He needs to get a little dirty. If I were Bryant, I'd be going out with a different woman every night. Too many of these players settle down young. They don't get to enjoy the perks of being in the spotlight. I mean, look at the tweets we're receiving right now, Terry.
Terry: I'm scrolling through them now. Some of these tweets are so inappropriate we can't even read them on air.
Mike: Whoa, ladies. Keep it clean. We were just messaged a topless pic with Bryant's number painted on her nipples.
Terry: While we love your enthusiasm, ladies, I can assure you Bryant will never see any nudes you DM us. If anything, you're just making two middle-aged men wish they were twenty again.
Mike: Wait a minute. Holy crap! Wait just a minute.
Terry: What is it, Mike?
Mike: We have breaking news from the Dodgers. Leviticus Bryant isn't signing. They're letting him walk away. The Dodgers aren't signing Leviticus Bryant.
Terry: Wait, what? That's unheard of. How is he not signing with the Dodgers? He was drafted less than twenty-four hours ago. How can this be decided already? The Dodgers have the rights to sign each player they draft until August.
Mike: I know just as much as you do, Terry. There's an official statement. It's also up on Twitter in a series of tweets. I'll read the statement now: The Los Angeles Dodgers are a family and whether you've been playing with us for years, or were just drafted into our family last night, we want what is best for every member of our family. We regret to inform you that Leviticus Bryant will not be signing with the Los Angeles Dodgers, or any other MLB team this season. After the draft last night, an emergency put Bryant on a plane back home with his family. After several conversations today, the MLB, Bryant, and the entire Dodgers family feel it best that we let Bryant deal with this personal matter at home. We will not be signing the ASU pitcher. While we will always consider Bryant a member of our family, he has his own family to put first right now and we wish him the best of luck in his future. We hope one day we'll get another shot at this terrific ballplayer in a future draft.
Terry: What does this mean? I've never heard anything like this happening before. He was the number one draft pick!
Mike: I don't know, Terry. I just don't know. I'm speechless right now. What I do know is something major must have happened for the Dodgers to let him go without a fight. You just don't let a player like Leviticus Bryant walk away.