Chapter 18 (Dana):
I flip through the magazines on my couch. Gunner’s been gone so long. Then he calls me, we have a decent conversation and he has to abruptly hang up because I hear Alex shouting about something. I tried to call Sam, but she never picked up. Im so mad. I’ve never felt more alone and not included. I don’t care what the danger is I just don’t want to be left in the dark. I flip to the next page and flip my shit.
LOGAN PRESCOTT ABRUPTLY LEAVES SET IN APPARENT EMERGENCY
What? WHAT? I don’t even read the article. I stopped reading shit about Logan years ago. I go straight to him. I run in my room, change, pull out my keys and run to my car. I drive so fast down the highway I am glad I didn’t get pulled over. I storm out of my car and pound on Logan’s front door. He opens it, without checking the flipping peephole, which is so unlike him. I am abruptly taken aback when I see his appearance. His eyes are swollen and red. He looks dirty. His knuckles are bleeding. He’s wearing sweats. I gasp and take a step back.
“Logan, what’s…”
Dusty and Jazmine appear in the doorway so I shut up. Jazmine looks like she’s been crying. She’s still in her pajamas. Dusty looks completely shut down. What the hell. What the hell. Where’s Sam.
“Dana,” Logan says with a croaky voice. “What are you doing here?”
“Let me in.” I push through the three of them. When we are all awkwardly in the living room I turn to Logan and glare at him. He knows he has to talk. He sighs and visibly pulls himself together. He crouches down in front of the kids. He extends his arms to make a bubble around the kids but Dusty pulls away.
“Can I talk to Aunt Dana alone for a bit?”
“No surprise,” Dusty mutters.
“Is it about my mom?” Jazmine says so quietly but I catch. My heart seizes.
“It’s just adult talk.” He kisses Jazmine. Dusty grabs Jazmine’s hand and leads her upstairs while she cries. When they leave I see him rub her back. He’s a good boy. When they are gone I round on Logan. Logan, my successful, big strong brother, falls to the couch with his face his hands and cries. I’ve never seen him cry.
“Logan,” I gasp. I run over and put my hand on his back, trying to suppress my own tears. My heart is racing. “What happened? Talk to me. Please talk to me.”
Logan looks up and his eyes are so full of pain makes my heart hurt. I never wanted to see Logan hurt like this. “Sam… she… oh fuck I knew to. I knew.”
“Sam what? Where is Sam Logan? What the hell is going on?”
“I’m not completely sure. Your boyfriend hasn’t called me and updated me, but he doesn’t have to. I know Sam went off to save Alex from the bastard Gunner is chasing.”
“Gunner knows? Sam’s in trouble?” I squeak out. The room is spinning. “And Gunner knows.”
Logan sniffles. “Gunner didn’t plan for this. This wasn’t the plan in his defense I guess.” I breath a sigh of relief. If he knowingly put Sam in danger I couldn’t stay with him. That would destroy me. Ugh, love is so dangerous.
“Logan I…” then there is a pounding on the door. Logan lets out something between a groan and a whimper. “Does this ever end?”
He somehow gets himself up and goes the door. I follow him in case he emotionally can’t deal with people. I am prepared to step in. I think I am in shock. It doesn’t feel real to me. It can’t be real. None of this. Logan swings the door open and instantly the air leaves me.
Gunner.
I push past Logan and run into Gunner’s arm. I can tell he’s surprised to see me, but his tense posture softens the minute he wraps his arms around me. I want to cry, but I keep it together.
“Sam? Alex? Is he dead? What happened?” Gunner pushes me away and cocks his head to the side. Walking up the pathway is Sam. Sam. I turn to my brother. His legs give out and he grabs the door frame for support. Sam looks so sad to see how she hurt Logan. She walks past me, squeezes my shoulder and goes to her man.
“I’m so sorry Logan.” Tears run down her face and she holds his arm. “I had to. I couldn’t let him take Alex.”
Logan jumps forward and wraps his arms around her and cries. From worry, relief, anger I fall into Gunner’s side and he wraps his arm around me. “So everyone’s okay?”
“Everyone you know. A friend of Alex’s got shot. He took a bullet for her.”
“Oh my God.”
“She’s with him at the hospital.”
“Is she okay?”
“She will be. The man who hurt her all those years is dead so…”
“Did you kill him?” I feel sick about that.
“No. The man who killed him deserved the opportunity.”
I pull away and frown. “Opportunity?”
He smiles a little. “Missed you. Sorry, he had to kill the rapist, murder creep. I am grateful he did the hard work.” I shake my head and slap his arm. I look back over at my brother and future sister.
Sam is crying. Logan is holding her, per usual. God, my brother adores her. I am a hundred percent sure she is crying because she feels bad and is overwhelmed from all that happened. Sam is strong for the world, but when she is around my brother her walls come down and she’s just a normal girl. Logan looks at me and shakes his head. Gunner grabs my hand and squeezes it hard, commanding my attention.
“Want to go back to your apartment. Just me and you?”
He cocks an eyebrow. Gunner is definitely in his dominant mode. I mean he always is but I remember when he was working for Tim. When we hung out right after he got off a gig he was so much commanding than when we spent a lot of time together and he had some time off.
I nod and walk over to Sam. I give her arm a squeeze and whisper for her to call me. I nod at Logan, and let them have their moment. Good luck to them, because they have two kids they have to deal with. They can’t just cry, have sex and talk. They have to explain to their kids that everything is okay. I don’t envy them. I don’t offer to babysit to help them, but Gunner would completely kill me. He wants alone time just the two of us desperately. Probably to do the former; cry, have sex and talk.
Once we are in the car Gunner’s posture relaxes considerably. The second the doors are closed and we drive away my worry hits me like a freight train. I want to ask Gunner six hundred questions, I want to make sure he’s okay, I want to check for injuries, but I can’t do any of those things. Gunner’s in all alpha mode and will just brush me aside and be annoyed if I treat him like that. He will take it as an insult. I’ve learned this the hard way. The benefits of friending a criminal before dating him.
“You look skinny Dana,” Gunner says, breaking up the silence.
“Thank you.”
Gunner shoots me a very hard look. “I didn’t mean it like that Dana.”
“You think I look bad?”
“I think you look like you haven’t been eating.”
“I...Geez, I don’t need to explain myself to you! How is it you have been out on a killing mission and you make it seem like I am the one who has been indulging in bad habits!” I cross my arms over my chest and slump back in the seat. I know he’s saying this because he cares but whenever anyone brings up my bad habits I get unusually defensive. It just makes it worse now given where he just was.
The rest of the ride is silent. I can see Gunner is stewing over something, but whatever it is he doesn’t say it. I remain in my stubborn, closed off posture, but I hate that I feel the need to have a silent battle with Gunner. I missed him so much and now I’ve gotten myself into a ‘who is going to apologize first’ battle with the most stubborn man in the world. That’s the real reason I am pouting. Stupid feelings. Stupid hot, dangerous boyfriend.
When Gunner pulls up to my apartment I get out of the car first and bolt up to my apartment. I play it off like I am still being stubborn, but really I am intensely mortified because I didn’t clean up and left in a hurry. My kitchen counter is filled with hot cocoa ingredients and let’s say say not all the ingredients are in their respective containers. My couch has been turned into a blanket hoarders dream and my tv has wires everywhere from trying to connect YouTube to my television. In fact, I am pretty sure my TV is still on and playing some girly crap. Ugh.
I throw open my door and quickly turn off the TV. Then I run to the kitchen and try wipe up the chocolate from the counters frantically. I am hunched over, mid clean up when somebody touches my shoulder. I jump and turn around. Gunner is standing there looking thoroughly amused. He cages me in with his arms and smiles. I love his smile, but I so genuinely humiliated I can’t think straight. I know my cheeks are flaming red. Gunner is totally on the verge of laughter.
“Did you subside solely on hot chocolate while I was away?” He laughs.
“It’s hot cocoa and I was constantly changing the ingredients. I never used the same recipe twice!” Ugh, why was I trying to save my dignity? It’s beyond saving at this point.
His smile gets even wider. “Is that so?”
“Yes. Mini marshmallows, big ones, cinnamon, nutmeg. It’s never ending really.” Gunner tries to hide his amusement and looks back at the filthy counters.
“I see that.”... and my facade falls. I hide my face with my hands and groan.
“Please stop. This is so embarrassing. I didn’t know you were coming back today. I left in a hurry. I would have cleaned up.”
“You would have hid all this from me?” I look up at him with my mouth open.
“Uh, duh you idiot!” I slap his chest. Gunner lets his head fall back and he laughs so hard. When he looks at me his eyes are bright and happy. Something I rarely see from him, except for when we are together joking around. It’s one of the things that makes me happiest in life.
“Oh Dana, you don’t know how much I needed this. I love you.”
My insides turn all mushy like they do every time he says that to me. “I love you too Gunner. I missed you. I was worried.” My voice is soft. I hate admitting to him that I was worried, but I can’t hide it from him either.
He smiles and kisses my forehead, but his eyes quickly darken. Since I know he won’t hurt me it honestly just turns me on.
“What was that crap in the car about not needing to explain yourself to me.” His tone is low and he traps me in even further in his arms.
“Ah, I knew you were stewing over something in the car!” He doesn’t say a word and keeps staring at me. He really expects an answer to this. “I don’t need to explain myself to you.”
Gunner leans in and kisses me so aggressively I have to lean onto the counter for support. I moan as he wraps his hand around my waist. I hold onto him, before it can go any further he pulls away and keeps that same dark expression on his face.
“You are my girl. It is my job to protect you. It’s easy on jobs like the ones I just had for me to make sure you don’t get involved in any way. However, how am I supposed to help you when your enemy is your own mind, huh? I need you to explain yourself to me, because I love you.” Then he regains himself. “You have to. I will make you.”
“Oh, don’t get all alpha now. That was most possibly the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me. And you, you left me out of everything on purpose. You didn’t want me to get hurt.”
Gunner just nods. “Yeah, and your mind. I was protecting that. It was some twisted shit Dana. I love your heart. Im not gonna let some Russian asshole change you in any way.”
“But Sam and Alex?”
He waves a hand flippantly. “They are hardened. Good people, but no one’s darkening their hearts anytime soon.”
I snort. “You are an asshole. You do know that right?”
“I say it like it is.”
“No, you say it as you see it.”
“Same difference.”
“Oh my gosh and you are cocky too.”
“Confident babe.”
“Cocky.”
“Confident.”
“Cocky.”
“Confident.”
“Are we five?”
He kisses me and scoops me up in his arms and takes me to my room.
Nope. We aren’t five.