Chapter Four

Gunnar didn’t know what he’d done to piss Gianna off this time, but instead of trying to figure it out, he headed to the nearest bar where he could knock one back and forget his troubles for a while.

He wasn’t dressed for it, but he didn’t think anyone would mind. Or notice, for that matter. He’d covered the entire town that morning on foot and not a single person recognized him with his shades and ball cap on. He loved it.

He sat at the bar and ordered fries and a burger while the guy next to him did the same.

“They make the best burgers,” the dude next to him said. “Only thing better is their pulled pork.”

“Why aren’t you having that then?” Gunnar asked, taking a swig of his beer as he watched sports highlights on the TV mounted over the bar.

He shrugged, staring at the screen. “Just in the mood for a burger, I guess.”

Gunnar suspected his companion was a man of few words, which suited him just fine. He wasn’t in the mood for small talk anyway.

“Levi,” the man said, extending his hand when the broadcast broke for a commercial.

“Excuse me?”

He grinned. “That’s my name. Levi Rowe.”

“Oh.” Gunnar clasped his hand, admiring his firm grip. “Gunnar.”

“I know who you are.”

“You do?”

“Sure, everyone does.” He laughed. “You think just ’cause we choose to live out in the middle of nowhere that we don’t watch TV, listen to music, or go online from time to time?”

“Uh, no, I didn’t think that. I just…” He didn’t want to sound like an arrogant ass, but he was used to being accosted by fans who recognized him. “Haven’t met anyone who’s recognized me, that’s all.”

“We believe in minding our own business ’round here,” he said, turning his attention back to the screen. “You want to be left alone, this is the place to come.”

Gunnar suddenly liked the idea of being incognito. A lot. “It’s nice here,” he admitted. “The peace and quiet is a much-needed change of pace.”

“I don’t know how the hell you live…” He frowned. “Where is it? L.A.?”

“Yeah. Sometimes I don’t know how I live there either to be honest. It suited me when I was younger and liked living that lifestyle. But it’s gettin’ a little old now.”

“You couldn’t pay me enough to live in a big city,” he said, his big frame shuddering at the thought. “All that noise and pollution and shit. Give me quiet and open fields any damn day of the week.” He gestured out the window by inclining his head. “I may be biased, but this, my friend, sure as hell feels like paradise to me.”

Gunnar smiled when he called him a friend. He had plenty of casual acquaintances, but the only people he truly considered friends were his bandmates and manager. The fact this stranger might consider him a friend spoke of the kind of person Levi was. Trusting. Open. Probably had faith in people, unlike Gunnar, who’d never learned how to trust anyone.

“You might be right,” Gunnar said, nodding at the bartender, who placed a plate in front of him, overflowing with mouth-watering food. He was used to paying thirty bucks for a burger that had so much fancy crap piled on it that it didn’t even resemble a hamburger anymore. But this, this was the real deal.

Levi laughed at his reaction. “You not used to eating like that or what? You look like a man who’s been on some damn vegetarian diet and is salivating for a taste of beef.”

“Not far from the truth,” Gunnar said, groaning when he finally bit into the grilled burger. “God, that is good.”

“What do you usually eat?” Levi asked, still looking amused as he dug into his own lunch. “No, let me guess. Sushi? Caviar? Squid?”

“Man, let me tell you, I grew up not knowing where my next meal was coming from, so I still appreciate food, whatever it is.”

“Sorry,” Levi muttered. “I didn’t mean—”

“Hey, don’t apologize. You’re bein’ real with me. I like that.” He popped a fry in his mouth followed by another. “I don’t have too many people who’re willing to be real with me anymore.”

“The price of fame, huh?”

“Somethin’ like that.” If anyone had told him the price he’d have to pay for fame, he wasn’t sure even that deadass broke kid he’d been would have been willing to pay it. “The truth, Levi? I don’t even know who the hell I am anymore.”

He could hear his publicist’s voice in his ear telling him to shut his mouth before the tabloids caught wind of his claim and turned it into a massive meltdown or mid-life crisis. For all he knew, this guy could be recording the conversation, trying to get him to open up so he could turn a fast buck selling the story, but his gut told him otherwise.

And he needed a friend. Someone outside of the music business who didn’t give a rip about fame or fortune.

“I hear that can happen,” he said, taking a swig of his beer. “I’ve got plenty of friends who lost sight of what was important along the way.”

“Maybe I never knew to begin with,” Gunnar muttered, suspecting that might well be the case. “Here’s the deal,” he said, still shocked at his willingness to open up to a stranger. “I had it all, right? Beautiful woman who was committed to me. Two great kids. A career path that would land me in the Hall of Fame, no doubt.”

“But?”

“She left me, and from there, everything just seemed to fall apart. All of a sudden she was gone. My kids were gone. And I felt like I had nothing left. No purpose anymore, ya know?”

Levi just nodded while he ate, waiting for him to continue.

“It’s not about the money anymore. It hasn’t been for a long time.” He stared at the scarred bar, wondering when he’d realized that money didn’t give him a reason to get out of bed in the morning. “I don’t need more stuff. The fancy cars and guitars don’t do it for me anymore. Neither do the vacation homes and…” He sighed. “None of it does it for me anymore. It’s just stuff. Toys my kids will be stuck with when I die.”

“Your kids still think you’re a good dad?” Levi asked, looking at him out of the corner of his eye.

“Yeah, I think so. They still want me around, at least.”

“Then that’s something to build on, I’d say.”

Something to build on. He turned those words over a few times before he thought about it… a foundation he could build a new life on. But what would that life look like and who would want to be a part of it? Would he have anyone left if he walked away from his career? Did his friends stand by him just because of who he was and what he did for them?

“It may feel like you’ve got nothing, but if you’ve got even one person who loves you, I’d say that’s something.”

“I guess you’re right.” He thought of his girls. He wished he’d been a better father to them when they were growing up, but he couldn’t turn back time. He could only be a better man moving forward.

“And I don’t imagine it’d be too hard for you to find another woman,” Levi said, smirking. He looked around the bar. There were only a few women there, but each one of them seemed fixated on Gunnar and his companion. “Even here, just look around. You could take your pick.”

“But what if the only one I want is the one I can’t have?”

“Ah, then that might be a problem.” He grimaced at some score that flashed across the bottom of the screen. “This the woman who left you?”

“Yeah.”

“You sure it’s not a case of wanting what you can’t have? Maybe if you got her back you wouldn’t want her anymore.”

Gunnar couldn’t blame him for thinking that. He probably would have too in his position. “The way I feel about her is the one thing I am sure about, man.”

“Then get her back.”

“You don’t know Gianna. If—”

“Hey, is she the cute little brunette who works in Gabby’s flower shop?”

“Yeah, you know her?” Gunnar asked, suddenly feeling uneasy. His kids told him their mom had been on a few dates. What if one of them was with this guy?

“It’s a small town,” he said. “Someone new moves to town, especially someone who looks like that, and it’s hard not to notice. So, she’s the reason you’re here, huh? I wondered why you’d come to a place like Vista Falls unless you wanted to slip under the radar.”

“I came here because of her… and my kids.” And they were the reason he wanted to stay. “I’m kind of surprised you didn’t know about us. Isn’t the grapevine usually solid in places like this?”

He offered a bemused smile before he said, “I don’t pay much attention to gossip, Gunnar. Could be you two have made the rounds now that you’re in town, but I can’t say for sure. Why? You wanted to keep it under wraps?”

“No, but she did. For our girls’ sake, I guess. Gianna brought them here to get them away from all the craziness in L.A. She grew up in a small town and claims it did her the world of good. I guess she wanted Ramsey and Keegan to have the same experience.”

He understood Gianna’s reasoning. Their daughters were young and impressionable, getting interested in boys, thinking about college. She wanted them to make smart decisions. He did too. He just wished they didn’t have to be so far away from him.

“That’s understandable,” Levi said. “Growing up like this can help you to keep your head screwed on straight, that’s for sure. I don’t know from experience, but I’ve heard living in those fancy suburbs and big cities can be hell. Always feeling the pressure of having to keep up with the Joneses. We don’t have much of that around here. Sure, some have made it big. Made a lot of money, but they never forgot where they came from. Never tried to impress people ’round here with all the money they made.”

Gunnar felt kind of sick when he thought about his multiple homes and collection of cars. His multi-million-dollar wine and cigar collections. Hell, he only smoked a stogie a few times a year.

“I grew up with nothing. Less than nothing,” he said, pushing aside his near-empty plate. “Can’t tell you how many times I crashed on a friend’s couch or went to school hungry as hell.”

“Must have been rough.”

“It was. I think that’s why I started collecting things.” All of his expensive collections were meticulously stored, catalogued, and insured, from jewelry to art. Hell, he was pretty sure his vocal chords were insured, if that were even possible. “I figured even if I lost all my money, I’d still having something worth selling. I’d never be dead-ass broke again.”

“I’d say I don’t think it’s possible for someone in your position to lose it all, but I know that’s not true. You hear about it every day, right? Celebrities who’ve gone nuts. Spending their millions faster than they can make them.”

And he knew deep down that’s what he was afraid of… losing it all. He feared one day his fans would just stop listening. They’d stop buying his albums, downloading his songs, coming to his concerts. They’d stop caring about him, stop supporting him… stop loving him.

“I guess that couldn’t happen living a life like this,” Gunnar said, thinking about what it would be like to leave most of his material possessions behind for the simple life Gianna had chosen.

“I don’t imagine it could,” Levi said, reaching for a toothpick on the bar. He twirled it around in his mouth before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a couple of twenties to cover both of their lunches.

“Oh hey, you don’t have to do that,” Gunnar said, reaching for his own wallet. He couldn’t remember the last time anyone bought him anything. He was always expected to pick up the tab because he was usually the richest guy in the room.

“My pleasure,” Levi said, waving him off. “You can get it next time.”

“Okay, thanks.” Gunnar sincerely hoped there would be a next time. He liked this guy and felt he had the kind of common sense that could help him get his life back on track.

Levi pulled out a business card and handed it to Gunnar.

He looked at it before smiling. “You’re a bladesmith? That must be a pretty cool job.”

“It is.” He pointed at the card. “You want to see what I do, stop by any time. I work from home.”

“Cool, I will.” Gunnar wasn’t just blowing smoke. He was sincerely interested in learning more about Levi’s life and why he seemed so content. Gunnar offered his hand. “And thanks for lunch, man. I appreciate you letting me bend your ear too.”

“Anytime at all. My cell number’s on that card. Call or text anytime you feel like meeting back here for a beer.”

“You can count on that, my friend.”