Erik hadn’t even acknowledged my existence today, which I guess was a good thing. I refused to think about what he had said to me the other night.

I only had one thing on my mind.

Dirty Name.

Erik stood in front of us. “Today you will attempt the obstacle course. For most of you, this will be the first time you’ve ever tried it.” He shot me a dirty glare, and I shot it right back to him. “Many of you will fail. If you do, we will drop you. You must complete this course in less than fifteen minutes. Let me show you how it’s done.”

And there Erik went, sprinting through the course like it was a hopscotch on a child’s playground. Fuck that guy.

This time he used a different technique on Dirty Name. Instead of using his wrists to pull himself up, he took a running jump off the log and then landed with both feet planted firmly on the first hurdle. Damn show off. What was he? A ninja?

He finished the course and walked over to the group, a cocky smirk on his face.

Why did he have to be so hot?

I centered my mind, focused on my breath. I could do this. I would complete Dirty Name. Today.

My classmates ran in front of me, but I quickly over took them. My agility came in handy up the ropes.

And I had the advantage of having run this before.

But then, it stood in front of me. Dirty Name. The obstacle that been the death of my relationship with Erik.

I would not allow it to be the death of my dream.

Just as I was about to jump, Erik ran beside me.

“Clements. Are you going to fall again? You’re a goddamn officer, an Olympian.”

“No, Instructor.”

Like a cat, I crouched on the log as I had done so many times in my mind and sprung up, leaping to the hurdle. My arms reached it this time, and I grasped them around it, hugging it for dear life, but I lost my grip and fell to the ground.

Fuck.

“That was pathetic, Clements. What is wrong with you? How hard is it to do one leap? Is this like the time you fucked up that body leap at nationals and caused your team to lose the championship? Just like you will cause good men to lose their lives due to your incompetence? That didn’t even remotely resemble perfection. And it’s because you are inside your tiny little brain defeating yourself. Do it again!”

Fucking asshole. I hated him. How dare he bring up something I told him in confidence out here. He was trying to shake me, but I wouldn’t let him.

I ran back to the log, praying this time would be the one. I was so close. I squatted low and propelled myself up to the hurdle, my palms slamming against the wood.

“You failed, Aria. This isn’t the Olympics. There is no prize for 2^nd place. We call it first place loser. You’re a loser. If you don’t master this hurdle, you will be dropped. Is that understood?”

“Yes, Instructor Anderson.”

“Drop down and give me one hundred pushups. If you mess up, start again. If your chest isn’t parallel with the floor, your ass better be up in the air. Is that clear?”

“Yes, Instructor Anderson.”

I dropped to the sand and knocked out my pushups, making sure to eat the sand with every damn one.

Over the past week, I’d become a connoisseur of sand. Though I preferred the salty aftertaste of the sand closer to the shore, the sand on the “O” course at least wasn’t mixed with tire tracks residue like the sand that was alongside our running path.

I would not give up. I would conquer Dirty Name. I would spend every free second I had practicing it until I made it.

I looked up and caught Erik staring at me. But his normally angry scowl toward me was absent. He seemed to be eye fucking me. And was that a smile on his face?

But he had just berated me.

Hmm. Berating me was his job. . .

A thought crossed my head. I needed to see Erik again. Alone. By now he must’ve had time to think. He was a rational man. Maybe I could get him to really understand me. I needed him to forgive me.

It was completely risky. If we were caught together, I would inflict even more damage on his career, and I would probably be forced out.

For the first time, I realized I wanted something even more than becoming a SEAL.

Erik.

I needed to at least let him know that what I felt for him was real. How much I still thought we would be unstoppable together. How much I craved him and wanted to make him happy. I wanted to thank him for how he had treated me when we were dating. How his belief in me made me more certain than ever that I would succeed at here.