Jackie

I looked out the kitchen window. The ocean was lapping at the beach in front of the house, and there was a crimson freighter in the misty distance. I could see the heads of Hannah and Kayla as they poked in the tide pools. Occasionally Charlotte’s blonde ponytail would pop up too, but she was mainly hidden by the low bank of the shore. I wasn’t worried though; the ocean was placid there, and the girls would look out for her.

I could also see Sharon, snoozing in a hammock with a sunhat over her face. Our two weeks of holidays had gone by in a blur. The first week we spent enjoying the island: kayaking, swimming, picnicking, finding new beaches, and lazing around. Then Sharon and her new boyfriend Neil arrived, and every night turned into a party with long dinners and much laughter.

Neil Boyd was a hilarious Scot, and I could never tell when he was telling the truth or kidding around. They’d met when Sharon called him out on an error in a house inspection report he made.

“Tore a strip down one side of me and up the other, she did,” he told us. “But I like ‘em fiery.”

However they met, he was a good match for Sharon. He saw past her tough exterior to the jelly doughnut inside, and he appreciated her properly. After finishing the dishes and drying off my hands, I searched for a sweatshirt so I could join the others outside. I tucked my mini-sketchbook and markers into a pocket. Out in the backyard, I heard the muted shouts of the boys. They were in the driveway playing hockey. I came around the corner and saw Leo lift his stick and explain something to Tristan. My son nodded, and they started moving towards the makeshift hockey net at the end of the driveway. Neil, who had zero vanity, was wearing an oversized life jacket and a bike helmet to play goal. Leo passed to Tristan, who immediately shot, lifting the ball above a sprawling Neil. Score! Leo and Tristan cheered and high-fived each other. I smiled and an unexpected tear rolled down my cheek.

Don’t be a total wuss. But Leo coaching Tristan in hockey was so unexpectedly moving to me. I tried hard, but there were some things I could never help my son with. Tristan was now as dedicated to hockey as he used to be and had insisted I sign him up for the league in our new neighbourhood.

I sat down on a rickety lawn chair and began sketching the lighthouse in the distance.

“Hey, Hannah said that it’s Charlotte’s birthday soon. Is that true?” I whispered to Leo in bed that night.

I still didn’t feel completely comfortable sleeping together in the cabin, with kids in the rooms on either side of us. But nobody else seemed to think it was a big deal, especially Leo. He thought that sex was a natural, healthy part of our relationship and nothing to hide. I only wished I could be as relaxed as he was. Whenever we did have sex, I was constantly shushing him, worried that we would wake up one of the kids and scar them for life. And one night when there was a bad thunderstorm, both Charlotte and Tristan ended up sleeping in our bed. Dr. Freud was welcome to sort that one out as soon as he mastered reincarnation.

“Yeah, her birthday’s on Tuesday. I’m meeting Sophie for dinner that night. We’ll go out to a nice place.”

“Well, it’s Hannah’s birthday in a week too. She’s going to be on vacation with her dad then. So, I was thinking, why don’t we have a surprise party for the two of them tomorrow? It’s the last night for all of us to be together.”

“You have the best ideas,” Leo said and kissed me.

So the next day, we left Sharon and Neil in charge and under the guise of going out for a lunch date, we headed into the little village for provisions.

To my great surprise, it was Leo who went nuts shopping.

“Look at these decorations.” He pointed to a dusty rack of party supplies in the back of the general store, apparently left over from the seventies. “We should get all of them. Look, they have those letters that spell out Happy Birthday.”

He began piling streamers, balloons, and party hats into our basket.

“Calm down,” I said, removing a couple of packages. “I cannot blow up that many balloons without passing out.”

“Sorry.” He beamed at me. “This is the first time I’ve been able to plan a birthday party for Charlotte. Usually it’s Sophie, or else my mother takes over.”

So I let him loose. He wanted to get gifts for Hannah and Sophie as well, but the selection wasn’t great around here. Finally, in a tiny dress shop, he managed to find a tie-dyed t-shirt and floppy hat for Charlotte, and a set of essential oils for Hannah. I was impressed that he found things that both of the girls would actually like.

“You know, when I first spoke to you on the phone, I felt like you didn’t even know your daughter that well. But I was wrong, you two are completely in sync.”

Lines creased his forehead. “No, you were right. I thought I knew Charlotte, but all I knew were the external things. Spending so much time with her without my family pitching in has let me know her so much better.” He smiled at me. “Of course, I couldn’t have managed it all without you. Charlotte’s had a wonderful time getting to know your kids. I have too.”

“Yeah, it’s funny. I was worried about how everyone would get along. But it’s worked out so well. And Tristan’s excited about hockey now. He’s convinced he has shooting superpowers now.”

Leo nodded. “He’s at a good age for learning right now, and he picks things up quickly. He’s gonna have a great season.”

We picked up a cake at the little bakery. Leo and Neil took the kids out to a faraway beach, while Sharon and I got everything ready.

“Fuck the male patriarchy,” declared Sharon. “How come they get to go to the beach while we have to do all the party stuff?”

“Because there’s wine here?” We were drinking a bottle of the island wine. “I love doing things like this, surprise parties. You could have gone with the others. We’re not doing anything fancy for dinner.” I had plans to serve up every bit of food I didn’t want to haul back to Vancouver. If I made it into an attractive buffet, that would fool the kids.

“It’s okay. I haven’t been able to spend much time alone with you.”

“No, you’ve been too busy draping yourself all over Neil.”

Sharon hooted. “Yes, the sight of those pale and skinny legs in board shorts has sent my hormones into overdrive.”

“Most men have ugly legs,” I pointed out. “That’s why long pants were invented.”

“Not the boy-toy coach though. His golden drumsticks are straight out of Hot Dad Magazine. You lucky bitch.”

I laughed. But truthfully, every part of Leo was hot.

“You’re really happy, Jackie. I’m glad. It’s something you deserve.”

“God, I’m not one of those women, am I? I need a man to complete me?”

Sharon’s eyes narrowed. “Fuck, no. That’s not what I mean. You and I are so different. I thought you were nuts not to date any of the guys that asked you out in the past year. You waited. And the waiting paid off.”

“So Leo is getting the Zennaro seal of approval?”

She shook her head. “He’s a pretty closed person, so I can’t say I know him well enough to judge. But the way he is with the kids and the way he treats you, I do approve of that. And like I said, you’re happy now.”

I smiled. “Enough stalling. It’s time to blow up balloons. Once we finish up in here, we relax on the deck and finish the wine.”

Soon, the place was completely decked out in tacky decorations. There were balloons, streamers, and the long-suffering Minx had a party hat on. Mao refused to sit still for any accessories.

“Surprise,” yelled Sharon and I when the kids walked in and looked around in bewilderment.

“Whose birthday is this?” Hannah asked.

“It’s a double celebration. Yours is next week, and Charlotte’s is in two days,” I explained. I brought out the smorgasbord of hot dogs, spring rolls, and myriad other leftovers. Yet everyone seemed happy picking out their favourites. And when eaten at a picnic table in the evening sunshine, it was a feast. We stuffed ourselves, laughed a lot, and then there was birthday cake and ice cream.

“This has been the best summer of my life,” Charlotte declared. And it was tough to disagree with that. The future was something I tried hard not to think about. When Brent left, I made it my philosophy to take the days one at a time because I couldn’t deal with much more than that. But at this moment, the kids were happy, I was happy, and I dared to dream about more perfect times like this.