Chapter 22
Marry Me
At lunch, the next day, all six of us are gathered in the boy’s kitchen for lunch. I’ve been gassy all day, probably from the two corndogs I had for breakfast—I’m PMSing again. Of course I’ve farted in front of my roommates, but I’ve managed to control myself around the guys. I’m thinkin’ I’m not gonna be able to keep this one in. It’s been building since we started making lunch, so it’s not going to be quiet either.
I’m struggling not laugh just thinking of Gemma and Shyanne’s reaction if I let it fly—they would be completely mortified. It’s totally worth their reaction, plus, I'm pretty sure this will take care of my Adrian problem. I can't imagine he's going to want me, the girl who plays anal acoustics at the dinner table, to be his girlfriend, pretend or not.
As soon as the noise echoes through the kitchen, everyone goes completely silent. I think they even stop chewing their food. Of course everyone looks at me because… well, it's me.
I roll my eyes, still trying not to laugh. "Oh come on,” I say to the girls, “I fart in front of you two all the time. You had to know that it was eventually going to happen in front of the boys."
Before either of them can respond, Adrian jumps to his feet, eyes wide, shaking his head. “I can’t fucking do this anymore,” he says before he practically runs out of the kitchen and to his bedroom.
And there it is. Problem solved.
But just when I think I’ve gotten control of the situation, Arian rushes back into the kitchen. He drops to his knees next to my chair and reaches up to take my hand.
“I know I told you I wasn’t going to propose yet, but holy shit, Keegan. You just farted, out loud, in front of our friends, while we were eating lunch.” He lifts my hand and kisses the back of it. “I started to fall in love with you the first time you mentioned the zombie apocalypse. I fell a little more when you stuck a metal object in the toaster while it was plugged in, and just now, I fell completely in love with you.” He lifts his other hand, showing me a pink and black ring with a skull and crossbones on it. “I picked this out after you stuck a knife in the toaster.” Adrian’s smile gets wide when he looks from the ring back up to me. “Keegan Marie Hughes, will you marry me sometime in the far-off future?”
Well, how about that twist? I’m tempted to smack him in the ear for pulling this stunt, but his wide eyes look like he’s pleading with me. I get why everyone in this room is shocked, instead of laughing—Adrian looks like he meant every word. I glance down at the ring he’s holding and have to wonder where he got it. More importantly, when did he get it? We just had the conversation last night about him needing a babysitter or girlfriend… whatever. There's no way he went out after that and got this ring. He said he got it a couple weeks ago. Is he seriously saying that he is been thinking about this for a while?
Realizing everyone is waiting for me to say something, I speak the truth. “You are one seriously fucked-up individual. You know that, right?”
Adrian nods, with an anxious expression.
“Do I have to have sex with you?” I throw this out because that’s exactly what I’d ask if this whole thing were real.
Adrian shakes his head and answers instantly, “Not for at least two months.”
What? Where did that answer come from? I shake my head. “Whatever.”
Adrian slides the ring on my finger, then lifts my chin with his thumb, and kisses me.
When his mouth closes over mine, he grasps the back of my head, pulling me hard against his mouth. He kisses me like he's been waiting to kiss me for months. This kiss causes my fingers to twitch, desperate to rip off his clothes. Inside my chest, I feel as though my heart grows arms and digs its fingers into my ribs, as it slams itself into my chest over and over again.
When he pulls away, I’m pretty sure I’m breathing a lot harder than he is.
“I have to get to class,” he says, then grabs his backpack and walks out the front door.
As he walks away, I have to refrain from fanning myself—not my face. No, the heat I'm feeling is between my legs. I think I'm going to need some one-on-one time with Hawk today.
“Um, Keegan…” Gemma stutters, but Shyanne goes for the smack to the back of my head.
I rub my head while scowling at her. “What the fuck was that for?”
Her eyes are huge. “Keegan, do you not see how the last fifteen minutes were like an episode of The Twilight Zone?” She throws her hands up. “Sweet Zombie Jesus, you just accepted a proposal… From Adrian!”
“It was kind of sweet,” I say, honestly.
“Keegan, he asked you to marry him because you farted in a room full of other people,”
I shrug. “I’m pretty sure I could do worse than a guy who tells me he has fallen in love with me because of all my negative qualities.”
I can’t help but hear my mom’s words replay in my head. “You have always made your own way, been your own person. And the guy who will make you a priority will be the guy who loves that most about you.”
Fuck, what’ve I done? This guy, who I’ve sworn to keep at a distance because of the effect he has on me, just made me his fake fiancé. I’m gonna spend time with him, and he’s gonna get further into my mind. Then he’ll turn and walk away, without a second thought, or even a goodbye. Just like they all do.