Chapter 14
Edmund glanced around at the faces of his family as he took a sip of his water at dinner. No one seemed to be interested in speaking and the unusual break in tradition made him uneasy. His mother had even failed to make her customary comments about losing her position at the table.
The tension was so thick, he could hardly swallow the liquid down. As he glanced at his mother and aunt, he couldn’t help but see that they were feeling the same thing. Alarm pricked at his spine. Something must have happened today that he hadn’t been privy to. Although it was true that he’d been keeping to himself this past week, an issue of this magnitude surely would have leaked into his locked study.
He cut a glance at Thomas, but his cousin avoided his eyes. And, Edmund couldn’t bring himself to look at Carolyn. He still didn’t know what to do about her. How could he prove he wanted her, with or without the child, then keep his distance in order to prevent producing another?
“This is the quietest meal I believe I have ever shared,” he said at last, unable to take the undercurrents in the room any longer.
Aunt Hannah slammed her glass down on the table. “We thought you would appreciate the solitude. Clearly, you do not.”
His mother cringed, and he stared at her in confusion. He would have thought she’d take pleasure in the woman’s nastiness toward him. Recalling how Carolyn claimed that her behavior was fake, he wondered which of her actions were real.
“Of course he appreciates it,” Carolyn defended him, much to his surprise. “Your generosity in offering the duke a quiet evening is heartening.”
Further stunned at her words to his aunt, he stared at Carolyn, but she didn’t look at him. What was going on? From the look on her face, she truly meant to compliment the woman. However, from the glare his aunt flashed her, it wasn’t well taken.
“Very well put.” Uncle Joseph beamed at Carolyn. “I do enjoy seeing everyone getting along so well.”
Aunt Hannah snorted. “You, dearest Joseph, are—”
“Ladies.” Carolyn stood. “I believe it is time to leave the gentlemen to their port.”
As soon as the women filed out, Edmund looked at both men left in the room with him. Still, Thomas avoided his gaze, but Uncle Joseph met his gaze and offered a smile. “Someone better tell me what happened today.”
“It seems as though the house is falling to where it should,” his uncle explained. “I daresay, you can continue as you have. The women have worked out their issues. All you have to do is get your wife with child again and all will be well.”
Thomas’s back went straight as red crawled up his neck. Curious, Edmund studied his cousin, but he ignored him. Edmund had certainly missed more than he’d realized during the day.
“I’m glad to hear everything is working out,” Edmund intoned. “Thomas, do you have anything to add on the subject?”
“Not at all. This is between you and the duchess.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Nothing.” Thomas met his gaze then, but he gave no hint of his thoughts. “Absolutely nothing.”
Realizing his cousin and his wife had been talking about him again made him suppress a groan. Honestly, he couldn’t blame her this time. After all, he hadn’t exactly made himself accessible to her. He would count this as the push needed. Regardless of whether he liked it or not, it was time to sit down and have a serious talk with Carolyn.
He felt as though an eternity had passed before the evening came to a conclusion. He’d endured the mundane conversation and veiled threats until he could stand it no longer. Taking Carolyn’s arm, he gratefully escorted her to her bedchamber.
As was her tradition every night, she dropped a curtsy at her door, then disappeared inside. Ever since her accident, he had only joined her after he’d prepared himself for bed. He caught the door. Tonight was different.
She turned stunned eyes on him before moving aside to grant him entrance.
“I understand from Thomas that you and I have something to discuss,” he began without preamble.
Her eyes rounded further. “What did he tell you?”
He narrowed his eyes as he moved to stand in the middle of the room, noting that she didn’t come any farther inside. That was interesting. This must be more serious than he’d originally thought.
“Just that you and I needed to speak.”
She lifted an eyebrow as she crossed her arms over her chest. “You haven’t wanted to talk to me in over a week. One word from Thomas, and that has changed?”
Gritting his teeth, he kept ahold of his anger. “I didn’t come in here to argue with you.”
Guilt streaked across her features as she lowered her eyes. “You’re right. I’m sorry. Before, when I was . . . Well, I suppose my emotions haven’t been what they used to be. I’ve been struggling with my temper as of late.”
The look she gave him said more than her words did, but he chose to ignore it. “I understand, trust me. And, in light of the circumstances, I suspect it is natural.”
She offered a grim smile as she walked over to the fireplace and sat in one of the chairs he had insisted be placed in her room. “Will you join me?”
“Of course.” He paused, thinking better of his quick agreement. “That is, if you intend to tell me what this is about?”
“Very well.”
As he sat down, he noted the way she wrung her hands and wouldn’t look him in the face. Exactly like Thomas had acted. The truth of the situation dawned on him, and he ground his teeth together while forcing himself to remain seated.
Bile rose in his throat. It couldn’t be true. She couldn’t be having a relationship with Thomas. Fury burned through him at the thought. He didn’t want to believe it.
“I’m trying to give you an opportunity to tell me,” he forced out his now dry throat. “But, if you don’t tell me quickly, I’m going to start believing my own conclusions, regardless of their validity.”
She nodded. “Thomas and I spoke about you today. Actually, it was more about our situation.”
“Our situation?” He didn’t like the sound of that.
“Yes. Even he can see how distant you have become toward me.”
Her anger was back, but he was too relieved to care at the moment. So, she wasn’t interested in his cousin. He suppressed a sigh. When did he become such a jealous sort? Regardless, their relationship still bothered him.
He frowned. “I don’t like you turning to Thomas when you should come to me.”
“How am I to do that when you lock yourself away from me? Then, any time I talk to you, I’m shut down. You are the most difficult man I have ever met.”
“That may be, but I’m speaking to you now.” He worked to keep his budding anger under control.
She let out a breath and rubbed her forehead. “This isn’t going the way I’d planned. I just wanted everything to go back to how it was before my accident. That’s why I was talking to Thomas.”
Clearing his throat, he shifted in the chair. How could he tell her things would never be that simple between them again? They hadn’t spoken about the child, and he had no idea how to approach that conversation.
“I’m sorry, but we can’t go back.”
She nodded her head. “I suspected as much, but what if there is a way? Thomas has proposed something . . . unorthodox, but it might be what we need.”
“And, what would that be?”
“A child.” She kept her steady gaze on his face.
Relief washed over him. Somehow his cousin had convinced Carolyn to let him see to the heir, and she had agreed. Although their relationship wouldn’t go back to what it had been earlier since he couldn’t chance getting her with child, at least they could be at ease around each other with the matter settled.
“I believe that would be best. Likely, Aunt Hannah will also favor the new situation, so she too, will leave us in peace.”
“You are comfortable with this? I must admit, I’m not at all pleased with the idea.” She appeared stricken.
“For years I’ve anticipated Thomas providing an heir, so I have already accustomed myself to the idea.”
She glared at him. “Well, I wish I could be so content with the idea of another man getting me with child, but I cannot.”
“What?” His hands clenched as his fury threatened to take his vision. Surely, he’d heard her wrong.
“Your cousin has generously offered to become the father of my child, and you are in complete agreement with him.”
“No!” Edmund snarled as he stood up so fast the chair almost toppled over. “I’m going to kill him.”
~ ~ ~
Carolyn stared, wide-eyed as her husband paced her bedchamber, murder in his eyes. Although she hadn’t been sure what to expect when she’d told Edmund of Thomas’s plan, this hadn’t been it. The man appeared possessed. As he moved, his hands fisted and unfisted, all the while muttering under his breath and making angry sounds.
When Thomas had given her instructions on what to say, he had assured her that her husband would fight for her. That he would want to be the one to give her a child, but that didn’t seem to be what was happening.
Suddenly, Edmund whipped around to face her, accusation in his eyes. “How can you even entertain the notion of being with another man? If you love me as you claim, you would have told him to go to hell.”
Jumping to her defense, she marched over to him. “I would have if you had given me any options. How do you expect for us to live like this? So afraid to get close to one another that we don’t even talk? At least when I was with child, you spent time with me.”
“So, your solution is to have Thomas join you in your bed repeatedly? What if it takes time?” His voice broke on the words. “Are you prepared to give yourself to him every night until you conceive?”
She swallowed. Although she and Thomas hadn’t ever truly considered this as an option, they should have first thought about what they were suggesting. Of course Edmund would.
“I hadn’t really thought about that.”
His blue eyes smoldered with rage. “I bet he has. I’m going to kill that son of a bitch. How dare he—”
Worried about Thomas, she grabbed Edmund’s shoulders. “Don’t hurt him. Likely, he was only jesting, and I . . . I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“Of course you should have,” he shot back, pulling away from her grasp. “Any time a man speaks to you like that, you come directly to me. I’ll not allow anyone else to touch you.”
“I don’t want anyone else to touch me. Just you. But, I can’t live like this any longer.”
She turned away from him and steeled herself from what she knew she had to do. No matter what she had tried, nothing seemed to get through to him. He would continue to withdraw from her, and she couldn’t sit by and wait for him to completely leave her.
“Live like what?” Some of the anger had left his voice.
“Wondering each day if that will be the day you push me further away. Watching us grow apart until there is no us left will kill me.”
“That won’t happen.” His voice was tight. “You belong to me. Forever.”
Spinning back around, she bit down on the pain exploding in her chest. “Yes, and there are a number of gowns that belong to me. However, I shall never wear them again. They sit, gathering dust in the back of the wardrobe.”
His jaw clenched. “I will never cast you aside like that.”
She shrugged. “As you say, but I have felt like those discarded dresses for a week now. Edmund, I don’t want to lose you, but I need you to come to terms with the possibility of fathering a child. Otherwise, this will never work.”
He was shaking his head before the words were completely out of her mouth. “You know I can’t.”
Exasperated, she stomped her foot. “Blood isn’t evil. Your father was that way because of his circumstances and experiences.”
“You don’t understand. You—”
“Did you know my grandfather was mad? From the stories I’ve heard, he used to speak to people who weren’t there, and even argue with them. Despite his condition, the man fathered five children. Five. Not one of them inherited his madness. If your theory is correct, then the entire world would be full of Bedlamites.”
He just stared at her, his expression hard. She would give just about anything to know what he was thinking at that moment, but his closed face offered nothing. Then, he turned and walked to the door. Without a word or so much as a backward glance, he left the room.
For a long time, she stared after the door, willing it to reopen. When he didn’t return, she forced herself to retire to bed where she cried herself to sleep.
The next morning, she had no desire to rush down to share a breakfast without Edmund, so she wandered through the empty hallways. A large part of her wanted to slip into one of the unoccupied bedchambers and go back to sleep. She wasn’t physically tired, but mentally, she was spent.
So lost in her miserable world, she didn’t realize she wasn’t alone until she ran into a solid male form.
“I’m so sorry,” she said as she drew back and looked up into Uncle Joseph’s confused face.
“That’s all right, my dear.” He closed the door he must have come out of. “I wasn’t aware anyone was in this area so early.”
Embarrassed that she been caught hiding from everyone, she felt her cheeks heat. “Yes, well, I was exploring in order to work up an appetite.”
He laughed, but it sounded forced. “I can’t fault you for that, as it was precisely what I was doing. I’ve always found a walk in the morning helps to ready me for breakfast.”
Anxious to get away from the situation, she nodded. “Then, I will leave you to your stroll.”
After he inclined his head, he moved on, but she remained standing there. Curiosity struck her as he disappeared down the hall. Peeking into the room he had come from, she noticed the bed still made. So, he hadn’t been using this chamber instead of his own.
Glancing around further, she noticed the bookshelf. The two halves didn’t quite match up. She sucked in her breath as the realization dawned on her. This was the room Thomas had shown her. The one with the secret passage he’d warned her not to take unless she wanted to end up in the dowager duchess’s bedchamber. Carolyn could only think of one reason why Uncle Joseph would be leaving the passage at such an early hour.
Knowing she couldn’t face the woman right now, she decided to forgo breakfast. However, hours later, she still felt discomforted by the situation. When she saw the dowager in the drawing room, Carolyn quickly altered her course.
“Your Grace,” the dowager called making Carolyn cringe. “Please, come and join me.”
Not wanting to be rude, Carolyn turned around and walked into the drawing room. If the woman intended to make an attempt at friendship, she would put aside her discomfort and accept what Edmund’s mother offered. Carolyn only hoped that this had nothing to do with seeing Uncle Joseph that morning. That was not a conversation she wanted to have with anyone.
“I would be pleased to join you.” Carolyn took a seat across from the woman.
“Since the duke and his uncle went out to meet with the tenants and Hannah took Thomas off to God knows where, I thought the two of us could talk.”
Learning Edmund had left caught Carolyn off guard. She was pleased that he planned to see to his duties, even without her pushing him. However, she had hoped to be able to talk to him today. She supposed that could wait.
“In general? Or, do you have a specific topic in mind?”
“We haven’t had an easy relationship, and I know the fault lies with me.” The dowager held up her hand as Carolyn opened her mouth. “Don’t even consider refuting it, I assure you, everything was done on purpose.”
Surprised at the complete honesty, Carolyn’s mouth fell open. “I’m not sure how to respond to such a thing.”
The woman laughed. “I’m not asking you to.”
“Then, may I ask why you dislike me so much? And, you can’t tell me it’s because I took the position of duchess from you. I can see through that lie.”
“Of course you can. You are smarter than I’d originally thought. As much as I don’t want to admit it, you’re a good wife for my son. Or rather, you would be if things were different.”
“What are you talking about?”
She let out a long sigh. “I’ve been keeping a secret in order to protect Edmund. I don’t think he’ll ever know what I have done for him, but I suppose that’s not the point. A mother does what she must for her child, regardless of the cost.”
“I’m afraid I don’t understand.”
“And, I’m afraid you never well, at least not fully. You see, having such a great title and the funds to support any endeavors you desire attracts a certain amount of negative attention. Some of the things you’ve done since you have arrived—not to mention your very presence—have disrupted what I have spent years building.”
Inwardly shaking her head, Carolyn couldn’t believe she had fallen for the woman’s attempt to draw her in with false words. This wasn’t about Edmund, it was about the dowager getting her way. Unwilling to hear any more, Carolyn stood and walked to the door.
“Well, I’m sorry to have upset your plans, but I’m sure you can figure something else out for yourself.”
“You don’t understand. What you’re doing is putting Edmund in danger. He will be hurt. Or, worse.”
Spinning around, Carolyn studied the very real grief on her mother-in-law’s face. This was the real her. Despite what Edmund thought, she cared for her son.
“Tell me everything.”
Tears dripped down the woman’s cheeks. “I can’t. Just stop what you are doing. Let things return to how they were prior to your arrival.”
Before she could utter another word, the dowager duchess rushed past her and out of the room.
~ ~ ~
Edmund slowed his stallion as he met up with his uncle. The man’s wide grin mirrored his own feelings on the success of the day. Uncle Joseph had taken the lead with the tenants, but everyone seemed to accept Edmund’s presence. Not to mention, his mask hadn’t seemed to frighten anyone or even encourage curious eyes. He should have done this long before now.
“I must agree with your previous assessment. You joining me today has brought no ill thoughts from the tenants. I do believe they enjoyed seeing the two of us together.”
“I agree. I’d also imagine they trust me to care for them if the situation called for it.”
Uncle Joseph lifted an eyebrow. “Thinking of taking over the duty?”
With a shrug, Edmund ran his eyes over the fields and forests in front of them. Ever since Carolyn had begun pushing, he had found himself taking more pride in his estate. As the duke, he had a duty to these people. To this land. And, he would neglect it no longer. And, as Carolyn pointed out, that should include producing an heir. The idea made him uneasy.
“Can I ask you something?”
The man let out a strained laugh. “When have you ever felt the need to ask?”
Steeling himself against the reaction he knew he would receive, Edmund kept his focus on the road before him. “It’s about my father.”
“I see.” Uncle Joseph reined in his horse and gave Edmund his full attention. “You haven’t spoken about him much over the years. What would you like to know?”
“Was he always like that? Cruel and hateful, I mean.”
After a long pause, his uncle scratched his head. “I suppose not. But, aren’t we all a product of what we are made?”
“From my understanding, his parents were not like him. So, how could they have made him into such a monster?”
“They didn’t, well not completely and certainly not on purpose. You see, as the heir everyone expected a lot from him. Most of the time, it was more than he could give. And, we mustn’t forget how Hannah treated Lawrence. She never liked being the first child yet not the heir. She was regarded differently since she was a female, and she hated it.”
Nodding, Edmund could see the sour woman taking out her circumstances on her brother. “I don’t doubt it, but she said the two of them got along well.”
“They did after a time. When Lawrence had learned how to defend himself in this world, the two of them became inseparable.”
“And, you excused him for his behavior because of this?” The thought alone had Edmund clenching his teeth.
“Of course not. As the youngest, I was greatly ignored by the others. I was unaware of the majority of my brother’s dealings. That man deserved dying young. And, for his deference in life, we laid him out in the abandoned hunting cabin for his death.” He shook his head. “I still can’t believe those boys set the place on fire.”
“What boys?”
The sideways look his uncle offered indicated he believed Edmund to be naïve. “You know who I’m talking about. Baron Dailey, Viscount Knightly, and the Earl of Starsen.”
Edmund stiffened, agitating his stallion. After regaining control, he returned his attention to his uncle. “They didn’t set it on fire. They saved me from whoever had done it.”
With a shake of his head, his uncle shot him a patronizing look. “They were stupid children. Probably didn’t realize you had fallen asleep inside the cabin. Luckily they had thought to check the place one last time before they left.”
“That isn’t possible, nor does it make sense.”
“It was a long time ago, and a traumatic memory for you. I know you don’t wish to think less of your wife’s brother, but I assure you, it’s the truth. Your Aunt Hannah led the investigation herself. She had been horrified someone might desecrate the body of her beloved brother.”
For years, Edmund had been solely focused on surviving that he hadn’t thought of how the fire started. This entire time he’d felt beholden to the brave young men who had risked their lives to rescue him. Had they been the ones to put him in danger in the first place?
He needed to get to the bottom of this. Perhaps it was time to pay a visit to his brother-in-law as well as the viscount.