chapter 20

when I come around

The next day, I’m a bundle of fucking nerves. I want to make a good impression on Ronnie’s family because I want her to be in my life permanently. All day I’ve been completely on edge. I’ve styled my unruly hair, ironed a button up shirt and even ironed my jeans, as well as shaving so thoroughly my skin is as soft as a fucking baby’s bottom. I just want Ronnie’s family to like me. Luckily, I’m not meeting her father yet because I don’t think I’ve got the stomach for that this soon. However, meeting her older sister is still frightening because I’m sure she’s just as protective of her. Hopefully, they’ll be able to see past my rough exterior like Ronnie does, but I know not everyone’s accepting of a man like me.

Grey is sitting by my feet as I finish getting ready. He’s babbling and trying his best to form words until I finally acknowledge him. It’s funny that he’s always fighting for my attention because he’s always on my mind. He giggles as soon as I reach down to pick him up and fidgets until I finally kiss his forehead.

“Da,” he says with a wide grin, before grabbing ahold of my thumb and stuffing it into his mouth.

“Hey, little man. I need that,” I say with a chuckle as I pull my thumb out of his mouth and tickle him before returning to my attempt at smoothing out my wild hair.

“Da,” he says again, demanding my attention.

I always think he’s in need of something, but he says the word with a smile as if he just likes testing it out. Maybe “da” is his new favorite word? Well, it’s his only word, but I’d like to think it’d be his favorite even if he had a huge vocabulary. Every time he calls me “da” it puts a smile on my face unlike anything else. I’m someone’s dad! The concept is an incredible one. Everything is even more extraordinary now that Grey’s calling me “da.”

I hear a knock on the door and take one final look in the mirror to quickly assess my appearance. My tattoos are pretty much covered, except for the black and grey lotus flower on my neck—which always shows no matter what shirt I wear. I button the collar of my shirt to hide the majority of it, but there’s not much else I can do. Still, I feel confident in my appearance and as long as it’s good enough for Ronnie, it should be good enough for anyone.

“Let’s go, little man. We’ve got some new people to meet today,” I tell Grey as I walk out of my bedroom to answer the door.

I thought Grey and I cleaned up fairly well, but, per usual, we’re fucking nothing compared to Ronnie. She looks so fucking sexy in her jeans—they make her legs look miles long—and she’s paired them with a plaid top, which is unbuttoned just enough to show the top of her tits. She’s completed the look with a jacket that’s a little bulky on her curvy, petite frame. She also has a fucking cute little beanie on her head and a matching scarf wrapped around her neck. I can’t control myself, I bring my lips down to meet hers and kiss her as though I haven’t seen her in years. She smells incredible; I can smell her strawberry scented shampoo and body wash. Grey’s fussy protests bring me back to reality and I pull away from her before things get too hot and heavy.

I can’t mask my nervousness from her; I’m too on edge to try. She gives me a sympathetic smile, and I can imagine she’s thinking, “Trev, you’ve got to calm down. They’re just my family and you’re a grown ass man.” I straighten up and take a deep breath, trying to put on a confident smile for her. Ronnie takes Grey and helps me put on his coat. It’s a little big for him, but it gets the job done. He absolutely hates wearing the thing, but I think he looks cute despite being little pissed. At least I don’t make him wear the hat Ronnie got him, and for that, he should be grateful. It’s cute, but it practically covers half of his face. I slip into my jacket and then we’re on our way. I grab Ronnie’s hand after locking up my apartment. As we head out, Grey is babbling to Ronnie and she’s too captivated by whatever he’s trying to say to notice that I’m still fucking nervous. If I want to have a future with Ronnie, I’ve got to do right by her family. If they don’t like me then I’m out of the picture. Knowing my future happiness pretty much depends on this meeting going well has me a bit on edge to say the least.

“Trevor,” Ronnie says in a strong voice that instantly gets my attention. “You don’t have to worry about today. My sister and her husband will love you, I promise.”

I shoot her a crooked grin and hope it doesn’t look too much like a grimace. Hopefully, she doesn’t think I’m a complete wreck—although, I can be pretty transparent. I spend the entire drive to her sister’s house practicing introductions in my head. “Hello, I’m Trevor Warren and I’m in love with your baby sister.” God, I’m going to fuck this up. I want to punch the steering wheel in frustration, but I know that’ll only frighten my passengers.

“Trev, will you chill out? Eden and Quinton will love you, I promise. And Harper will be an instant friend to Grey, just you wait and see.”

“If you say so, Ronnie. It’s just that I’ve never made a good first impression on anyone.”

“You made a good first impression on me.”

I smile at her and reach across the center console to hold her hand. “What did you think when you first saw me?”

She grins and gives me a once-over before saying, “I thought you were extremely hot and I just wanted to… never mind.” She blushes.

“What?”

“I wanted to run my tongue along the outlines of all of your tattoos.” My eyes shoot to meet hers and I’m practically choking on air at her answer. Holy, fuck! That was the hottest thing I’ve ever heard! “What did you think when you first saw me?” she asks.

“I thought you were incredibly beautiful and way out of my league.”

Grey babbles loudly in the backseat as if he were trying to give his two cents. I turn on a kid’s radio station for him while Ronnie gives me directions to her sister’s home. It’s not far from our apartment complex—about twenty minutes away. Eden’s house is gorgeous, the portrait of an American dream. It has a wraparound porch with white trimmings, and a giant garden surrounding the front of the home. I’m sure it’s every girl’s dream. I wonder if this is the sort of thing Ronnie wants. A house with a white picket fence, a husband, and two kids along with a dog to make up the perfect family. I could give her that. Couldn’t I?

Her sister, Eden, must’ve been waiting at the door because she’s running toward us as soon as we all get out of my truck. She’s tiny, with short brown hair and a vibrant outfit. Although she doesn’t seem as if she’d have much in common with Ronnie, they do complement each other well. It’s obvious they’re related. Eden’s a lot bubblier than Ronnie is and talks her head off before turning her attention to Grey and me. As soon as she sees him she coos and comes over to us. I’ve got to admit, I’m pretty taken aback by her outgoing and gregarious nature. As an introvert myself, this sort of behavior usually throws me off until I get to know the person.

“This must be Greyson,” she says with a smile as she gently takes his little hand and shakes it. “Ronnie talks about him all the time. She talks about him almost as much as she talks about you,” she tells me with a knowing wink.

Ronnie rolls her eyes, in good humor, at her sister and takes a step forward so she’s standing at her side. “Trevor, this is my sister, Eden. Eden, this is my boyfriend, Trevor.”

“You don’t know how happy I am to finally meet you. I’ve been trying to convince my sister to bring you over for lunch since she first started talking about you.”

I look over to my girl and smile, and we stare at each other for a moment as if we were having a private joke at the expense of her sister. Eden’s great, she’s just so fucking… energetic. I look back at Eden to find her staring at Grey again.

“He’s so adorable, Trevor. You must be so proud of him.”

The way she approves of my son makes me like her instantly, and suddenly, I can see exactly why she and my girl are so close. She’s really friendly and speaks to me without judgement, as if she’s known me for years. This isn’t something I’m really used to. I usually have to try pretty hard before someone can open up to me. Dean used to say it was because I gave people “bad vibes,” but that was back when I was a hot-head, constantly looking for a fight. Now, I only look dangerous and have to try my best to make it perfectly clear I’m reformed.

“I am proud of him,” I confirm with a smile tugging on my lips. “Grey’s amazing and just so smart. He’ll grow to be a lot smarter than I’ll ever be.” I bet if I gave him the best life possible, he’ll be better than pretty much everyone.

Eden looks from me, back to her sister then comments, “I’m just so thrilled to see my sister happy. You have no idea how many jackasses she’s dated.”

“Eden,” Ronnie says sharply, throwing her sister a disapproving look.

“Sorry, sorry,” she apologizes, smiling at her sister in search of her forgiveness. Ronnie’s shoulders relax and she smiles back. “It’s just good to see you with someone nice.” I wonder what sort of assholes she used to date. They better hope they don’t run into me. I’m reformed but I’m not that reformed.

I hear the sound of the front door opening and closing and look up to see a man who looks very familiar. I stare at him for a moment, knowing this must be Quinton, and wonder where on Earth I’ve seen him before. As he walks towards us with a toddler safely in his arms, I have a fucking epiphany. I know where I’ve seen him before! He’s the guy who was talking to Ronnie that day in the parking lot of our apartment complex, when I was spying on her! God, I feel like such a fucking idiot. No wonder they seemed close, he’s her brother-in-law!

“Hey, Ronnie,” he says with a smirk in my direction. “You must be Trevor. I’m Quinton, Ronnie’s brother-in-law.” He sizes me up and then gives her a knowing grin.

She blushes, and it makes me wonder how much she’s said about me to her family. I can’t help but wonder if they’re aware of my situation, and by default Grey’s. It’s weird thinking I’m the type of guy a girl would brag about having as a boyfriend. With all of my baggage, what is there to really be happy and boast about? However, if the looks her family are giving me mean anything, it seems Ronnie has been blustering about me. The thought is an overwhelming one.

“This is our little girl, Harper,” Quinton says, introducing me to his shy daughter. “Say ‘hi,’ sweetie,” he encourages her.

“Hi,” she says, softly. She looks at Grey and me with curious eyes before saying, “I three.” She holds up three fingers and smiles at us.

With short brown hair and pale skin, she looks just like her mom. I’m sure she acts just like her mom, though she seems really shy right now.

“Who that?” she asks, pointing to Grey, who in return is staring back at her with wide, curious eyes.

“This is my son, Greyson,” I tell her. I don’t see the point of calling him my nephew anymore. While he’s not biologically my son—I love him just as much as any biological parent could. Besides, when I refer to him as my nephew, I feel as if I’ve got to give everyone the story of my fucked-up past… my fucked-up life. Why go into all of that detail when I don’t have to?

“He cute,” Harper giggles, before placing her thumb in her mouth.

I smile, hoping this little girl will become a friend to Grey. He needs someone closer to his own age to play with. There aren’t any kids around his age in our apartment complex that I know of and he won’t be going to school for a while, either. He needs some sort of contact outside of Ronnie and me.

 

 

The time spent with Ronnie’s family goes much better than I expected. They aren’t as judgmental as most of the people I’m used to. Nor do they make me feel bad about my job, financial situation, or the lack of a college degree the way other’s always have in the past. Only an hour into our lunch, I’m feeling as if I’ve made two new friends. Quinton is a cool dude—nothing like the douchebag I imagined he was when I thought he had an interest in Ronnie. We actually have a lot in common despite our obvious differences. He’s very intelligent, so learning he’s a college professor at a nearby community college was conceivable. He teaches computer science and is a huge geek. While the girls chat, we discuss the Star Wars prequels and laugh at George Lucas’s attempt at a “romance.” Ronnie keeps shooting me smiles, obviously happy I’ve found another friend in town. Outside of Jaxson, I don’t really have anyone else to hang out with.

“Can me play with baby, Dada?” Harper asks, barely able to stay in her seat a moment longer.

Quinton gives me an inquisitive look and I quickly affirm that it’s all right. Grey’s been sitting on my lap throughout lunch and I know he probably wants to get down and stretch his legs. I stand up with him still in my arms and move to follow Harper into the living room.

“Want a beer, Trevor?” I hear Quinton call out before his wife quickly tells him to shut up.

I tense for a moment, feeling like shit all of a sudden. It’s embarrassing that I have such a fucking problem with alcohol. I wish I could socially have a beer with a friend like a normal person, but I don’t think that’ll ever be an option for me. “No thanks, I’m good,” I answer smoothly. “But I’ll take a bottle of water, though.”

I look over my shoulder and find Quinton giving me an apologetic smile, and I know instantly that Ronnie filled her family in on my past. They both must know now, to some extent, even if she didn’t tell them every detail. Hell, she doesn’t even know every detail because I’m afraid to tell her. Knowing that they know already makes me slightly angry because I wanted a chance to start off fresh without my past staining my present. Despite the small jab of anger, I know why Ronnie did it. Being the type of person, she is, I know she wanted to protect me from any temptation. Most men can come home after a long day of work and drink a nice ice-cold beer, unfortunately, I’m not most men.

Pushing those uncomfortable thoughts aside, I join Harper on the carpet with a now restless Grey. Now that my boy can stand, it’s all he ever wants to do. Of course, he can only stand on his own for a few seconds, but because of carpeted floors he doesn’t mind too much. Harper runs to her room to gather a few of her favorite toys and I allow my boy to play on the floor on his own. He stands up, falls back down, stands up, and falls back down until he eventually grows bored and reaches for me.

“Da, da,” he says with a giggle, “da, da, da!”

A giant smile spreads across my face as I pick him back up. Eden enters the living room, bringing me a bottle of water and beams as soon as she sees us together.

“Was his first word ‘dad’?” she asks, handing me the drink.

“Well, ‘da,’ ” I correct her with a smile.

“That’s just the cutest thing I’ve ever heard,” she gushes as Ronnie walks into the room. “Harper’s first word was ‘no.’ ”

“Well, I doubt he knows what he’s saying,” I laugh, not wanting to admit how much his first word touched me.

“I’m sure he does know, Trevor,” Ronnie says with a proud smile as she joins us on the carpet. “Trev is an incredible daddy,” she tells her sister.

My heart swells at her words and I feel like the most important man in the world all of a sudden. Ronnie thinks I’m an incredible daddy! Being turned on by the word “daddy” falling from her lips, momentarily distracts me from how fucking happy I am. She’s proud of me. My beautiful girlfriend is proud of me and that fact means the absolute world to me. In this very moment—I know I can be good for her; I know I can be the man she needs and deserves.