CHAPTER ELEVEN
Allison
Seven Years Ago
She’s going to be here any minute.
I checked to make sure the window was unlocked before I darted out my bedroom door and down the hall. We needed snacks and Mom had gotten all the appropriate things just for this night. Like she did every year.
It was my seventeenth birthday, and instead of having some crazy party, I kept the same celebration that I’d had since I could remember.
You see, my best friend and I were born almost exactly six months apart. And our mothers, well, they had been friends for a very long time, so it was only natural that they pushed us together from the moment I popped out. The friendship may have been encouraged to a suffocating degree, but it was never forced for us. We loved one another as if we were sisters. The thing was, Lulu and I balanced each other out in just about every way.
I was calm and quiet, if not a little reserved, while she was the light that lit up the party. She was street smart and good with people, while I was the one that made straight A’s. She had wavy dark brown hair and I had straight blonde.
It worked well though, because when she would get a wild hair to do something crazy, I was always there to reel her in. And when I would lose myself in homework, she would come and pull me out of my hole.
So, it was my birthday and Lulu and I had this tradition, you could say. She would sneak into my window and we would spend the night watching movies and eating junk food in my bed. I did the same for hers. It wasn’t like our parents didn’t know, but they played along, letting us have our silly little celebration.
I thought back to how the whole thing started. It was fourth grade. We were sitting in my room and she made a joke of how she would climb into my room in the middle of the night on my birthday just to scare the crap out of me. Well, a few months later she attempted to do just that, only the window was locked. So from then on, it became our thing.
I grabbed the bag of junk food sitting on the counter and turned to go back into my room. Mom wasn’t home yet and I knew she’d bring cupcakes when she got off work.
Angry voices rose from the front of the house, catching my attention. A shiver ran down my spine as I made my way to the front door to see what was going on. My dad’s frame filled up the front doorway with his back to me, while some man stood there with an eerie look on his face.
“You owe me,” the man said and his voice made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.
“Not today. I know what I agreed to, but just give her one more day,” my dad’s voice sounded strained but not like he’d been caught off guard.
I wondered what the heck was going on, and even though I had a feeling I should turn around and lock myself in my room, I stayed rooted in place. I didn’t have a clue what they were talking about but I had a feeling it couldn’t have been good.
Suddenly the man’s eyes caught mine and I could no longer hide the fact that I was eavesdropping.
“Ahhh, there she is.” A wicked smile spread across his face as his eyes raked over my body.
“Allison, come here,” my dad said and since I was a good child, I always did what he said.
I stood beside my dad, and my hands trembled so bad it made the bag shake, filling the air with its harsh sound.
“Yes?” I asked unable to take my eyes off of the stranger.
“I’m sorry,” my dad said and out of the corner of my eye, I could see his body deflate with acceptance. “It’s time for you to go.”
Then all at once, the room started to spin around me, the bag dropped from my hand as the stranger reached out and grabbed me. His fingers dug into my arm as he dragged me closer. His sweaty scent filled my nose and all I wanted to do was double over and heave up what little I had in my stomach.
“No. No! Dad?” I screamed as the man dragged me away.
I looked into my dad’s eyes, hoping to find the love and tenderness I’d always found there, but instead, I saw nothing. Not even a flicker of regret or guilt. I had no idea what was going on but I had a feeling in my gut that my life was about to change.
The flight kicked into my system and I jerked to get away so I could run, but his hold was too strong on me.
“Be a good girl, get in the car and maybe I won’t come back later and kill your mother,” he said through gritted teeth.
My body snapped to attention, there wasn’t a faint indication in his voice that led me to think that he wouldn’t do what he’d said.
“Good, very good. You may be a good keep, after all,” he said in my ear as his hot breath fanned my neck. It felt sticky and hot and I swallowed hard, trying to force the bile back down. He buried his nose and my hair and inhaled deeply. I wanted to get away but I also wanted to save my mother. I had never felt so torn in my life. “Let’s go.”
There were men waiting in his SUV. The windows were tinted so dark that I knew no one could see in. I was held down in the seat and tied up. Fear kicked in and I started to cry, try as I might, there was no way I could hold it back. I was scared like I’d never been scared before. This wasn’t a movie or a prank. This was real and I knew I was about to face my worst nightmare, even if I had no idea what that entailed.
I had wasn’t sure how long we drove for, my mind turned itself off and I felt like none of this was real. I started to hope that I was asleep and that I’d wake up soon.
The car stopped and two of the men dragged me out. I lifted my head to see that we were in the middle of an old junkyard. By the looks of the dry, knee-high grass and the rusted out cars, I would have guessed the place was abandoned. I wanted to scream and call for help but I had a feeling there wasn’t anyone around for miles.
“This is where it begins,” the stranger said as we walked further into the unknown.
That was when I saw it, an old shipping container that looked like it had seen better days. He pulled the door open and I was roughly pushed inside. The stranger walked over to me and grabbed my hair to pull me up. I felt the burn as the hairs started to rip out of my scalp and I cried out in pain because I could no longer hold it all in.
“You are mine now,” he said and I could feel the evil radiating through each word.
He left me there for days. I had no idea exactly how many because I couldn’t see the outside. I was left in utter darkness. I had to fumble my way around, choosing to count my steps as I hugged the wall so I knew the exact spot I had designated as the place I relieved myself.
My hair became a greasy, madded mess. Dirt from the floor caked my body. The smell of my own waste grew stronger by the second. I didn’t move if I didn’t have to. I stayed curled in the corner, trying my best to hold as much body heat in as I could. Being winter in the middle of Vermont, I had no idea how I didn’t freeze to death.
It was in that silent darkness that I realized there was no way out of this. That what was to come I could not hide from. So, I let myself break. I cried until I didn’t have any tears left.
Then I replayed all of my favorite memories one last time. I let in the fear, sadness, and heartache I had for those I cared about. I couldn’t imagine how my mom must have been dealing. And Lulu. I wished more than anything that I’d gotten to see her one last time.
I wondered why my dad seemed to know the man that took me and what he would tell everyone about why I was gone. I had no idea that my dad was so cold and I tried to find a time in my memories where I might have seen a glimpse of the monster hidden inside. But I couldn’t, and I wondered how psychotic of a man he must have been to be able to hide it all those years.
Slowly the memories played out and after they were done I imagined them fading out of my head. I wouldn’t let myself think of them ever again. I wouldn’t remind myself of the life I’d once had or the people that meant the most to me. Going forward, I would be numb.
I knew too much, read too many books, I knew that this situation wouldn’t end in a fairy tale. I may have had a pretty decent upbringing but I also wasn’t so naïve that I didn’t know that evil existed in the world.
The doors opened, and in walked the man that had taken me. His sinister smile chilled me to the bone. I thought being locked in that container would have been the worst thing, but he was about to prove me wrong.
He wanted to break me down. He wanted to show me how much power he held over me. He let me know that if I ever tried to run, he would hunt me down and the punishment for disobeying him would be death, but not for me, if only it were that easy. He promised me that if I ever even thought about escaping he would kill everyone I cared about. He would start with my mother. As he spoke I realized that he knew a lot about my life, more than any stranger should. He knew about Lulu and even about the guy who sat next to me in English that had a crush on me.
And then he broke me.
It started with me in the middle of a room full of men just like him. The leather vests that they all wore held a number of different patches. I’d later come to realize that this was a motorcycle club and they all followed their leader with the same amount of evilness pumping through their veins. And as he stripped me down and hosed me off like I was a dirty animal, I saw the look in their eyes and knew that not one of them was going to help me. Not a single one of them was going to even think about trying to stop what was to come.
I was seventeen, and my first experience was not only in a room full of men, but with them all.
By the time it was over I was just dead inside. I was covered in bruises, bite marks, cuts, and semen. I had never felt so ashamed and humiliated. I couldn’t even find the tears to cry.
“Get up, little whore,” he barked at me.
I stood on shaky legs as I tried to cover my exposed body with my arms. Wetness trickled down my legs and it felt sticky and slick as my thighs rubbed together when I took a step back.
“I own you,” he said, his dark eyes stared lifelessly into mine.
He was the Devil and he had just robbed me of my soul.
And this was only the beginning. He legally bound himself to me to further prove the point that he owned me. I never said the words ‘yes’ or ‘I do’ but I did sign the papers going along with it. All I could think was that I had to save them. And that was what the people that I cared about became from that day on, them. I wouldn’t ever picture their faces or think of them as individuals again. I wouldn’t remember how much they meant to me. I wouldn’t even let their names be whispers in the background of my mind.
Seven years I endured his torture.
Seven years I held back my pain.
Seven years I was a prisoner to a man that wanted to see how much I could take before there was nothing left inside of me.