“Hey,” Irina said, offering him a pile of folded laundry. “Great party.”

Ray inhaled and smiled at her. “Oh, thanks, glad you liked it. Did you win?” he asked as an afterthought, placing the pile on his bureau to sort. “I missed the match. Sorina is seriously obsessed with table tennis.”

He'd been convinced his sister wouldn't let anyone else touch the laundry after Sergi had turned all the babies' pristine whites pink. But as long as she wasn't complaining, he was happy Marisa was accepting help from someone. In that regard, he was very much aware that his sister and he were cut from the same cloth.

Irina scoffed. “Of course I won. And I let Iesu play with me so...”

“Very generous of you,” he said sarcastically.

“You look good,” she commented. He was pretty sure that was code for 'happy'.

“I am,” he agreed. “Did you have a nice time back home?”

“I had a nice time with Sorina,” she said pointedly. “But it's good to be home.”

Ray rolled his eyes at the correction. “Thanks for driving Marisa back all the time, by the way.”

Irina gave him a weird look, straightening from where she'd been leaning against his doorframe. “You don't have to thank me for that.”

“Well, she's my little sister...”

“She’s not... She's not that little anymore,” she said. It was the first time Ray had heard her sound unsure of herself. “And it's no problem, not like I'm not going anyway.”

“Do your parents live here too?” Ray asked, concentrating on getting his fresh sheets into his drawer—he liked to keep a set in his bedroom just in case.

“No, they are back in Romania.”

“Oh, that's... that's gotta be hard.”

She shrugged. “They visit sometimes, and besides I got Sorina and her family here. And you guys are alright too, I guess,” she added.

Ray straightened and met her amused eyes. “We do our best,” he assured her with a little bow.

“Anyway, laundry won't sort itself,” she said. “Don’t forget it's your turn to make lunch, Alec took that extra shift.”

He saluted, mockingly, but he was grateful—he was perfectly capable of performing all the tasks he was responsible for, but if he was stressed he found it hard to keep track of them without reminders.

It'd never been a problem before he'd become responsible for his own pack, and at first he'd resented the way his brain was failing him. But now that it was the betas—mostly Marisa and Irina—keeping track for him, it didn’t feel like such a failure on his part. It was just delegation—and a good leader knew how to use the people who worked for them.

&

[Got your results.]

It was so unusual for him to get a text unrelated to groceries that it took Ray a moment to process what Alec was talking about.

[And?]

[Can’t promise, but it says girl.]

“Fuck,” Ray said aloud, and Gabriel looked up from changing Sasha’s diaper. “Sorry,” he said at once. “I—”

“Ray, sit down,” his alpha said at once, body tensing as he glanced down at Sasha. “Just—give me a sec.”

Ray stepped back and plopped down on the armchair they kept in the corner of the babies’ room. Other than the biggest crib they had been able to find and the two sets of drawers, it was still pretty empty.

It suddenly occurred to Ray that they’d need another cradle for the new baby. The girl.

It felt impossible.

He had known there was half a chance he’d get his wish but Alec was right, he’d got what he wanted so rarely since he’d presented, he’d come to expect the worse.

“Ray?” Gabriel asked after he’d returned Sasha to the floor—Ray absently noticed someone had let them set up a set of Legos in the corner even though they’d agreed the babies should only play in the living room where someone could keep an eye on them. “What’s wrong?”

Ray glanced up at him, feeling a little guilty. “Nothing,” he said honestly. “I’m sorry... Alec just texted me. It’s a girl. Or... well, he’s pretty sure.”

Gabriel took a moment to answer. “That’s what you wanted?”

“He didn’t tell you?”

Gabriel frowned. “No. I mean... I guess it was a private conversation, why would he tell me?”

Ray shrugged. “Well, you two...”

“We wouldn't... I'm not saying we never talk about you, but we don’t—” He faltered, then crouched down in front of Ray and sought his eyes.

Ray let himself look him in the eye from the first time in what felt like forever. Gabriel's blue gaze was focused, and earnest, and kind. “You don't what?” he asked.

“I don't tell Alec everything we talk about,” Gabriel said. “And he obviously doesn't either.”

“But you talk to me about him,” Ray pointed out. “And you want me to talk to him about you.”

“Yes, I want... I want us to help each other understand, or explain, or whatever we need. But my relationship with Alec isn't more important than my relationship with you just because it's romantic. It's just different.”

Ray looked at him from under his eyes lashes, a little wary. “I’m not... I'm not ready to be over it. Yet. I'm not saying—”

“Ray.” Gabriel nearly overbalanced, then jumped to his feet and took a couple steps back. It meant Ray had to look up at him, of course, but he could hardly expect a guy Gabriel's size to kneel at his feet for long. “I don't expect you to be. That's not what I meant—I...” He stopped himself, then waved a hand at Ray to continue, apparently noticing he'd interrupted him.

Ray was almost too surprised to speak. “What do you mean?”

Gabriel exhaled, then leaned down to catch Clara as she tried to crawl under the dresser once again—there was probably something disgusting under there that had woken her untrained nose. “I meant our relationship doesn't depend on what we do in bed. The whole point of being your alpha is supposed to be that, but... that's fucked up. It's not really meant to be like that; the bond is not about sex and if we never... If you never want me to touch you again, it won't change the promise I made to take care of you.”

Ray stared at him. If he never... “But I will still go into heat.”

Gabriel shook his head. “You can ask Josh every time.”

Ray swallowed thickly and stood up; suddenly he couldn’t take the height disadvantage any longer. “Have you... Have you spoken about this with Alec?”

Gabriel took a moment to answer. “Yes, you were there. I mean, the whole point...” He trailed off, staring at Ray with an increasingly alarmed expression. “Okay, so I fucked up again,” he said slowly.

“Language,” Ray said absentmindedly. Gabriel didn't even point out that Ray himself had used the same language moments earlier. Instead he waited until Ray was ready to speak again. “Have you spoken about this with the others too?”

“Ray,” Gabriel said, sounding pained. “About what?”

“About letting me choose!” Ray snapped.

“By the Moon and the fucking stars, Ray, nobody needs to have a conversation about whether you get a choice about what you do with your own body!” 

“Don't they?" Ray demanded between gritted teeth. He could barely keep his voice even for the babies' sakes. This was the wrong time and the wrong place and— “Since when?”

“Since always. If... If it had been up to us—”

“It was up to you!” Ray interrupted, it felt like ripping something, but he was too angry, too hurt to care.

Gabriel stopped, closing his eyes and taking a slow breath in. “Yes,” he admitted. “But we didn't know. I know it's... it's a shitty excuse. But it’s true.”

It was. At least as far as Gabriel was concerned. And wasn't it exactly what Ray had told Josh had happened? He couldn't really explain why he was so much angrier at Gabriel. This had nothing to do with him going after Ray and leaving the babies.

“What about when you tried to make me enjoy it when I told you I just wanted to get it over with?”

Gabriel flinched and his whole body stiffened. “Okay, stop, we can’t—Let me call Yousuf to—”

Ray nodded, feeling awful. The babies couldn’t understand what they were talking about, of course, but that didn't mean they couldn't hear them raise their voices. And no matter what, this was an adult conversation to be had in private.

Yousuf came trailing after Gabriel doing his best to pretend he had no idea why he’s been called away to cover for both of them at once.

“Thanks,” Ray told him and walked past him and right into Gabriel's room across the hall.

Gabriel followed him in, then stopped without closing the door until Ray shot him a puzzled look. There was hardly a point to seeking privacy if they were going to leave the door wide open.

“Do you want me to close the door?” his alpha asked in a tight voice and it hit Ray like a ton of bricks that Gabriel thought...

“Yes,” he said, swallowing hard. “I...”

Gabriel pushed the door until it clicked shut, then moved to face out his window across the room, as far from it as he could possibly get from Ray standing by the door. “You think I don't care if you want to— If you want to sleep with me,” he said slowly.

“You didn't... You didn't listen,” Ray made himself say. It was true. Maybe Gabriel regretted it, but he'd done it. He'd kept pushing until Ray had...

“I care,” Gabriel said, voice scrapping out of his throat. Ray didn't say anything. “I was wrong. I know that. I thought... I thought you were just shocked and, I dunno, shy about how being an omega made you feel. You are—You are young. I thought— I remembered you'd wanted me before, so I figured you still did. It seemed you did, you were so...” He stopped himself before he mentioned how absolutely Ray's body had bent to his alphas' desires. “I was wrong,” he repeated, hopeless and as helpless as Ray had ever seen him. He looked up from where he was bent over the windowsill and met Ray's eyes in the glass. “But I’m not going to get it wrong again. You won’t let me. And Alec won’t either.”

“You don’t want to risk it,” Ray realised.

Gabriel turned around. “No,” he admitted. “Of course not, what kind of asshole do you think I am?”

Ray looked down, suddenly uncomfortable. Because it was one thing to assume Gabriel had done it not knowing, but to imagine he’d known what he was putting Ray through and had gone ahead anyway... It wasn’t something he deserved. It had just seemed so easy for him to ignore every signal Ray had been able to give. “Okay,” he said, and only noticed it didn’t answer Gabriel’s last words when his mate stiffened. “I mean, I—I get it. You didn’t know. I just—I felt like you didn’t care, like you just thought if I was... if my body—” He waved down at himself. “If you could, then...”

It took Gabriel long enough to respond that Ray looked up, seeking the answer on his face. “I don’t expect you to forgive me,” his cousin said softly, defeated. “I don’t—I’m pretty sure I don’t deserve you to. But I would like to... I don’t think I can leave and stay away. I mean, you are... you are my mate—”

“Leave?” Ray cut him off. “You can’t leave!”

“No,” Gabriel agreed gently. “I can’t.”

“And I don’t want you to, anyway." Ray huffed out a breath and stepped back until he could lean against Gabriel's bureau. He let himself take in the room—tidy and a little bare—to avoid Gabriel's face. "What would that help?” 

“What do you want, Ray?” his cousin asked softly and there was a weight to the words, a promise implied: whatever it was, if Gabriel could give it to him, he would.

Ray wanted to look up, but it seemed to be too much for his wolf when he was trembling a little already. “I want you to stay," he managed. "And I want you to be the best alpha you can. To take care of the babies, and to help out. And to... to be careful. I need you to be careful because... I don’t want to be scared of you anymore.”

He had to press his lips together to keep any other sound from coming out—he didn't think it'd have been words.

He heard Gabriel swallow thickly across from him. “That’s the last thing I ever wanted.”

It rang true between them, like a judgement. A promise. Ray thought of words, but he wasn't sure he was physically capable of producing any, and it seemed... absurd when they both knew now.

"I won’t..." Gabriel started, then seemed to think better of it. "I swear I won’t ever touch you sexually again without your express invitation."

Ray's head jerked up. "You can’t know—"

"I won’t," Gabriel insisted, all the power of his will behind the words. "If... if we miscalculated, if the wolves need it or something, we’ll talk about it. I will tell you about it and we will find a way. But I don’t want you to wonder, and I would like it to be okay to... to hug you, or just, I don’t know, give you a noogie if you score on me."

Ray swallowed, suddenly flooded with the warmth of Gabriel’s body. Not—not recently. Long ago, just a hug after a match time maybe. He’d grown up being touched casually—werewolves were a particularly touchy bunch—and then he'd gained a pack and lost that intimacy.

It was crazy, but it was like Gabriel said: they were supposed to have sex and it'd seemed like sex was all they could have.

"Is that okay?" Gabriel checked, unable to stand the silence long. "You don’t have tell me now..."

"I don't know," Ray admitted, glancing up to meet his cousin's eyes. "I... I would like a hug."

Gabriel's eyes widened, blue and startled. He was stupidly beautiful, but Ray didn't really care about the regularity of his features. He wanted the tenderness on his face, the insecurity born from love—it wasn't possible to love someone and not be a little afraid they'd break. Anything and anyone you loved was always too fragile for your taste, too likely to be damaged—by the world but also by your own words and actions. He straightened and Ray thought he might cross the space between them, instead he opened his arms in invitation and kept his eyes steady on Ray's face—vulnerable and open to Ray's refusal.

Ray wasn't sure this was a good idea, but he couldn't leave someone he loved exposed like that without responding.

He took a hesitant step closer, and then another, eyes on the slightly trembling corner of Gabriel's red lips. He didn't remember crossing the rest of the distance—it was all lost in the impact of their bodies connecting, the strength of muscle and sinew holding him steady, the tentative hands cupping his back as he threw his arms around his alpha's neck and forced him to lean down into the embrace.

Gabriel breathed out slowly next to his ear, still unsure, and Ray tugged at his long hair, demanding, until the arms around him tightened. Progressively, he relaxed against Ray, pressing the side of his face to Ray's forehead.

And Ray relaxed with him, wolf and man as one, and just held on in silence.

&

Gabriel had insisted on deboning and grilling chicken for dinner—knowing it was one of Ray's favourites—and Ray let himself be spoiled. They'd put the babies in the jungle gym, which Gabriel had fixed after its unfortunate encounter with Jamie's reflexes, and Ray had put on the TV as Gabriel went through chickens on the coffee table with quick, practiced motions.

"I didn't think you knew how to cook," he admitted, watching the process as much as the program.

"I lived on my own for years," Gabriel pointed out good naturedly. "And this is pretty much just prepping meet for grilling, doesn't take much."

It was true that preparing meat was a werewolf skill. Nice as it was to eat it fresh with sharper canines, sometimes it was necessary to hunt a little more to make up for the fact that they consumed about double the calories as a non-shifting human.

"Did you like that?" he asked, getting to his feet and going over to disentangle two of the pups who'd got a little too enthusiastic with their play fighting.

"Well, yeah. I guess it was a little lonely, I went back to visit a lot."

His parents, he must have meant, because he'd actively avoided Ray. Or so it had felt. "And that's when you met Alec, more or less?"

His cousin glanced up just as Ray turned back towards the sofa. "Yeah, couple months later. I didn't want to go back so much. My mum liked having me back, but my dad got a little annoying about it. I liked the guys from work and I figured there was nothing stopping me from hanging out with humans and getting laid."

"And then you fell for the first werewolf that crossed your path?"

Gabriel rolled his eyes, dropping another piece into the bowl. "Yeah, that's me, a walking cliché. Any other questions, mister?"

That shocked a laugh out of Ray. "You always called us that," he remembered. "You sound like Grandma Ruth."

"Hey," came a low greeting from the door and Gabriel turned his whole torso around to look at Alec. It made Ray smile even as Alec's gaze flickered between them. "You are cooking?" their doctor asked, walking into the room.

At their feet, there was a mini stampede as the pups realised another of their parents was home and Alec knelt to receive their enthusiastic licks and get half climbed into by Mikey. Gabriel was busy so Ray went over to rescue him.

Alec met his eyes with a tentative smile. "You are happy," he said, sounding pleased.

Ray nodded a little, rubbing Mikey behind the ears to get him to retract his claws so he could be removed from his perch on Alec's shoulder, where he'd climbed by stepping on Maria's head. Alec didn't seem particularly bothered by being practically at the bottom of a puppy pile, truth be told. He looked towards his lover and back at Ray, a question in his eyes. "We talked," Ray mouthed at him and tugged Mikey into his own arms.

His mate nodded, then scooped up Maria and Sasha, who were practically in his arms already, and crouched before slowly getting to his feet and forcing the two puppies to relinquish their hold. There were yelps of complaint until Ray tsked at them and guided them back to the jungle gym.

To his shock, Alec stopped by the sofa on his way to put down his own charges. "Gabriel," he said and leaned right in to press a kiss to the other alpha's mouth—lingering just enough for a tease. It left Gabriel looking as stunned as Ray felt, which was an undoubtedly good look for him, and Ray kindly pretended not to notice.

&

Despite Gabriel's assurances that he wouldn't discuss what they spoke of in private with the other alphas, Ray knew he had to tell Josh the news as soon as possible. He owed him the courtesy at the very least.

But in a way, the news made his decision all the more difficult.

He would have had good reason to send a boy away. Whatever he’d told Josh, he didn’t really have to ask his mother to know she’d agree to it and if he’d truly needed it...

But other than then knowledge of where she came from, could he really justify rejecting his own daughter for the sake of a man he'd personally ensured was beyond ever hurting him or his pack again?

Josh would be supportive either way, naturally. But Ray couldn't be sure he deserved that support. He needed to talk to someone who would tell him if he was making a mistake.

And that person was his mother.

It wasn’t like she was perfect and, deep down, Ray still hadn’t quite forgiven her for letting his uncle decide he should start a new pack and take five mates. But she didn’t need to perfect, she was his mum and one thing he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt was that she loved him.

Now that he had children of his own, he thought he might understand how hard it was to love someone that much and be forced to watch them stumble about, making mistakes, trying their best and failing. Just the idea of seeing a child of his forced into a situation as the one he’d been was... well, unthinkable. He breathed out, reminding himself of Gabriel’s promise that they would ensure the same thing never happened to any of the pups if they presented as omegas.

First he had to make the time to go see his mum, and for that, he needed Marisa to swap his schedule around so he could visit in the afternoon. He could have invited her over just as easily, but he didn’t want to talk to her in his own territory—he needed the distance and it’d been a week since he’d left the house at all.

“When do you want to go?” Marisa asked, glancing at the timetable on the huge whiteboard they’d installed on the kitchen wall.

“Soon?” Ray said and it came out hesitant enough she turned to look at him.

“You could go tomorrow,” his sister suggested. “Irina is driving over and coming back not much later. Or one of the alphas could get you earlier if you want.” Her eyes slid towards the whiteboard. “Alec’s shift ends at six.”

“Is someone free to cover for me?”

She shrugged. “I’ll do it. You can take my place for the day, then I’ll take your free afternoon on Tuesday.”

She said it easily, like it was no big deal, but there was something a little off in her voice. “You sure that’s okay? It’s not—”

“You are going to tell her, aren’t you?” she asked, meeting his eyes. She didn’t say more or look anywhere but at his face.

“She already knows,” he explained. “I... I need some advice.”

Marisa was silent for a long, heavy moment. “Can I... Ray, I want to say something but I don’t want you to take it the wrong way, or...”

He looked up at once, frowning. “Mari, you don’t have to worry about upsetting me. I’m not... I’m not gonna break. I’m doing a lot better, you know that, right?”

“Yes!” she said quickly, voice going high. “Obviously, I can see that. But... You are still worried about what will happen...” She hesitated, then pushed ahead. “When the baby is born.”

“Yes,” Ray admitted. There was no point in beating around the bush. She knew everything there was to know about it, really.

“I don’t... Why?”

Ray looked up and shot her an incredulous look. “Why?” he demanded.

Marisa raised her hands. “Don’t get angry!” she said, sounding a little short of temper herself. “I told you I have to ask you something and I just—I want to make sure I get how you are feeling first.”

“Then ask me, Marisa,” Ray spat out. “I can’t deal with all this talking in circles: what do you want to know?”

“Do you want to keep the baby?”

The question sent his pulse into overdrive at once and he had to look away from her earnest face. With a direct question like that... he could only answer the truth. He thought he might have been brave enough to do it, if only he’d known what it was. “Yes,” he tried, hoping it could be true. It rang hollow between them. He tried a denial next. “I don’t want to keep it.”

It was no better, his heart had skipped.

Marisa took a step closer to him. “Ray,” she whispered. “I get it.”

He exhaled, feeling like his throat was closing up. How could she get it? It didn’t even make sense; how could both yes and no be lies? He had to want something. “You wanna explain it to me?”

“You didn’t choose this. Not even like you chose your alphas,” she clarified. “That... That fucking arsehole forced it on you. And it’s not the baby’s fault, of course, but... If it was me—” Her voice broke on the word and Ray heard her swallow thickly, maybe holding back tears. She was really close but still not touching him. He wasn’t sure if he wanted her to stay away half as much as he wanted her to hold him. She didn’t move, but her voice when she spoke next was even, calm, and decided, and ready. “I don’t know if I could raise a child that came from such a terrible thing.”

He didn’t know why the words hit him so hard: it was nothing new, nothing he didn’t know perfectly well to be true, and yet... He found himself bending forwards and covering his face with his hand to cover up the tears springing from his eyes. He swallowed, trying to keep himself from breaking down and Marisa destroyed all his efforts by stepping into him and enveloping him in her arms. She was almost too small for it, but she strong enough to make up for her size, holding him tightly enough he’d have needed to struggle to get away.

Strangely, it didn’t frighten him. He didn’t want to get away—he just needed a minute when someone else was holding him up, when he didn’t need to keep going on pretending he was just fine and— “Shhh...” She hummed at him. He was crying, quietly wetting her hair and shirt. He clutched at her back, clinging to her hoodie as if he could keep himself afloat as long as he held on. And she held him back, rocking him a little and murmuring low, soothing words he couldn’t quite process. At some point, he calmed down enough that some words started making sense and he realised Marisa was promising, again and again, that everything would be okay, that she was going to help him through this and so would everyone else in their pack.

It seemed too good to be true, but she believed it, and... so did Ray.

She let him pull back a little and when she was sure he was breathing normally, stepped back and got him a glass of water from the sink. He drank it all, not waiting for her to insist.

He put it down and she nodded her approval. “I will take care of the baby for you,” she told him. Ray frowned a little because she’d been doing that for months already, that was the whole reason she and the other betas had come over. She could see his confusion but she kept speaking, “There’s milk pumps so you can do that and I’ll feed the baby a bottle. I’ll keep it with me in the beta wing, it’s no big deal now that I have my own room. And Irina will help if it’s very fussy.”

Ray stared at her. “I—Do you want to... to adopt her?”

His sister’s eyes widened. “Her? I didn’t— Yes,” she said. “I want to adopt her, but I don’t want to take her from you. I just...” She glanced away. “I’m not... I do want children. I always have, and I know I can’t have my own.” She tried to say it evenly, Ray could tell, and she failed to hide her pain. It was too recent, too raw. “But I don’t—”

“Stop,” he asked her and she did, looking up at him as if awaiting judgement. “I’m not angry at you for offering,” he reassured her. “I’m just... not sure. This would be forever and you are only seventeen; you can do anything you want with your life. Travel, get a job outside the house, or... I don’t know, anything.”

“Yes,” she agreed. “And this is what I want. I mean, I’m happy being your beta and looking after your children. I don’t... I don’t need more than that, and if you think you will be okay looking after her yourself and it won’t mess with your head, then please pretend I didn’t say anything.”

Except Ray didn’t think any such thing. He couldn’t. He wasn’t that good at introspection but he’d barely turned down an abortion less than a month earlier. And what Marisa suggested was as close as not having to make another impossible choice on top of that one as he could get: the baby would be with the pack but he wouldn’t have to spend all his time with her. “I... I have to think about it.”

Marisa gaped at him. “Ray! Of course you have to think about it! And talk to mum about it, obviously. We are not deciding her fate in a five minute conversation.” Her face softened. “How do you even know it’s a girl? You are not even showing.”

“Alec,” he responded curtly. He knew he should have appreciated the reassurance that his condition wasn’t noticeable yet but it simply reminded him that it would soon be.

She stiffened a little. “Well, um, you can go with Irina tomorrow. I’ll... I’ll go tell her.”

He wondered if she’d talk to Irina about what they’d discussed—but he didn’t have the energy to call her back and ask her not to. If he even had the right to ask.

&

Ray shifted on his seat, even though he knew perfectly well the plastic chair wouldn’t get any comfier no matter how much he fidgeted. "I have something to ask you... and it's about Marisa, but... I don't know, I want you to be impartial?"

His mother frowned a little, but nodded, pushing a cup of tea made just like he liked towards him.

"I'm thinking... Well, she asked if I would let her—" He curled his hands around his cup and bringing it to his lips. He couldn't taste the tea, but strangely he could feel the smooth porcelain against his lower lip.

"What did your sister ask you?"

Her voice came out rough, and Ray stared at the liquid, as if he could find the answer to anything in its depths, as if there was a way to make this less painful for either of them. "She wants to raise the baby for me. To... to adopt it, I guess."

He wasn't here to ask for advice like he'd thought. Once Marisa had brought the possibility, the relief he'd felt had been all the answer he'd needed. You were not meant to feel relieved when someone offered to take your child away from you.

He wondered if the wolf would care, once she was born.

But that didn't really matter; the child needed a parent that loved her, not an animal that’d make sure it was always fed and stayed away from predators and inconvenient crevices.

She'd never lack for food or shelter either way. It was something much more complex that Ray was afraid he couldn't give her. Something he'd had from his own parents, from his siblings, from his pack... Possibly the only reason he was still alive despite how terribly everything had gone since he'd presented: he knew he was loved.

He knew people had kids when they didn't have money or a home all the time, but those were things that luck could bring or take away. It was very different to have a child you knew you couldn't love.

"She's always wanted kids," his mum said after a pause.

"You don't—?" He glanced up, body tight with fear. "You don't think I'm... I'm wrong to want to do it?"

She jumped a little. "Wrong?" she repeated. "It's... It's your feelings, Ray. Your feelings can't be wrong, and... you have plenty of reason to feel the way you do."

"I just... maybe when I see her..." He stopped because his mum just looked patient. And in truth, Ray didn't want to convince her.

"Well, you don't have to make Marisa any promises yet, do you? And she will be staying with you regardless."

"But what about Marisa?" Ray demanded. "She's only seventeen, she shouldn't... she should enjoy her life, be young, do... I don't know, whatever she wants."

His mum snorted. "You think Marisa wants to go dancing and partying and whatever else it is young people do?" she asked incredulously.

"Well, she didn't really get to do it that much," he pointed out. "We always needed her too much."

"Yes," she agreed. "And we needed you too, but you went out with Josh and played football, went on dates... We made time for that because you wanted to do those things. And we did it for TJ too. But your sister... I don't know if you remember but once when she was about eleven, we were visiting the Kendricks and at one point the children made a right mess of the garden and she came over to tell us about it. You know what she said?"

Ray shook his head.

"These children's parents should be ashamed of them," his mother said in a tiny, serious voice that did sound quite a bit like Marisa.

He laughed. "It does sound like her."

"It is like her," she said. "She's never wanted that kind of thing, she's always wanted a nice home, enough food, peace of mind and quiet time to herself to watch her shows. And a family around her to keep her busy and love her for who she is."

"She's got that," Ray said softly. "Do you really think she needs...?"

"No, she doesn't need a child of her own. But she would love one." She hesitated. "You know I will take any child of yours in if they need it, right?"

He swallowed, but nodded. "I don't want to give you more work."

She shrugged. "Ray, children aren't something I have ever planned for. I most certainly did not plan to raise five on my own. But it was worth it, and it will always be worth it any effort to make any of you happier. I would be happy to do it."

She would do it well, too. She would love this little girl like she was her own because she would be—she was Ray's child too, after all—but he didn't need her to tell him that she was tired too. It'd been a long ten years since her mate—the man she was meant to be with forever—had been taken from her.

If he'd lived, she might have had more children. But he hadn't and now she could have time to take care of the ones she had instead—to spend time with Anne, Harry and Glen, and keep TJ in line until he presented, or moved out to explore the world, or whatever it was that Ray's brother decided to do with his life once he was eighteen.

She deserved that time. She'd earned it.

And Ray knew too well how hard her life had been to ask her to make yet another sacrifice for his sake. Not when Marisa actually wanted to do it.

"You have to settle any disputes we have," Ray warned her. "Like, I don't know, hair dying or boyfriends. If we cannot agree on anything, it's up to you."

His mother laughed. "Don't worry, I didn't think that would ever stop being my job!"