“So, what do you think…?”

My footsteps echoed in the huge empty space. Joe had brought me here, his hand over my eyes until the elevator doors had opened.

“You’ll have to use your imagination,” he said, drawing me over to the expansive glass windows. The view was amazing from this height. “We’ve got the entire floor,” he added, his excitement obvious. “This half will be the publication… Your foundation will have this entire space…,” he swept his hand wide. “Side by side.

We’re going to make one hell of a team.”

Over the last few weeks, Joe had worked with a drive that had exceeded my own. From the ground up, he was building a news organization all his own, entirely independent from the Decker family influence. It would focus almost exclusively on increasing awareness of worldwide hunger and disease; he had named it Hands On Deck. Word was already out, mostly from the front page features he’d run on RemedAid’s efforts. Donations and volunteers had been pouring in to both organizations ever since.

“I can hardly believe it,” I said, my breath coming in shallow pants. “It’s so much… so quickly…” I threw my arms around his neck and he kissed me soundly.

“I’m thinking… your desk over here,” he pointed to a lovely corner office with walls of old red brick framing and tall glass panels. “And me over here,” he walked me about a dozen feet away. “I want my muse close… you know, for inspiration.”

I laughed and curled against his chest. “You should take the corner, Joe. It’s bigger… more private. I won’t be around enough to get much use out of it.”

He leaned back and looked down at me. “You’ll be spending more time here than you think, Maggie. It takes a hell of a lot of desk time to run a foundation like yours. Just organizing your workers alone…”

“I’m not going to be organizing them, Joe. I’m going to be one of them. I’m putting a staff together to handle the business end. I’m going to be out there, hands-on, just the way I’ve always been.”

“You can’t head something this immense from the field, sweetheart. Not when you’re sending people halfway around the world on an assignment…”

“Then I’m going with them,” I shot back. “How can I lead the way, if I’m not there, Joe? And how can I ask them to take time away from their own lives and their own loved ones, if I’m not willing to do the same?”

“Damn it, Maggie,” he raked his hand over his head and scrubbed the back of his neck. “Do you have any idea how close a fucking call that tornado was? If you think I’m letting you fly off to third world countries without…”

“Let me…?” I snapped, cutting him off. “Let me…?”

I shook my head and pulled away. “You know how I feel about my work. This is what I do… it’s who I am. I thought that’s what you fell in love with.” I stared up into his eyes as he frowned down.

“Headstrong and reckless,” he said, nodding darkly. He took a deep breath and let it out. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. But you have no idea of the risks out there. Some of the areas you’re looking to serve are fucking war zones, Maggie. People with a hell of a lot more experience than you have are injured or killed every day. I had an assignment in Afghanistan before Dad died. There are things out there that no one should ever see.” He took my face gently in his hands. “You’re twenty-two years old…”

Part of me knew he was right… something deep down inside. I knew I didn’t have the experience, but I also knew that if I didn’t follow the path I’d set in front of me, that I never would. A life without some risk was a life that had never been fully lived.

I set my lips into a grim line as Dean’s warning flashed through my mind…

He’ll control the foundation, Mags… and he’ll control you.

“I don’t give a fuck about the money, Maggie.”

The argument had lasted the entire way home. “Well, it matters to me,” I muttered back. “I don’t want it, if it’s just a tool to control me. I’ll find my own funding… just like I always have.” I slammed the guest house door behind me.

“You’re being childish,” he retorted, making me bristle all the more. “To refuse my help means taking life-saving assistance out of the hands of those who need it most. This isn’t about pride. Not mine and not yours. It’s about doing the best we can, in the safest way possible. I don’t want any of the volunteers in danger, sweetheart. But you’re the only one I love. The only one I can’t take the chance of losing…”

I shook my head, my arms wrapped tightly around me. “I don’t want to lose you either, Joe. But I need you to believe in me. Not just my work, but me. I love you for loving me, but I don’t need rescuing anymore. This only works if you can see me as your partner… your equal…”

“And what about us, Maggie?” he asked gently. “We have so much history between us. And so much future ahead. Marriage and a family of our own to protect.” He reached out and put his arms around me. He lifted my chin and made me meet his eyes.

“Sometimes I wonder if I’m the one who isn’t entirely equal. I know you didn’t need me to rescue you, Maggie. But I’m damned glad I was there. I don’t ever want to wonder if you’re safe again. You have so much spirit inside you… So much courage.

I want you to stay with me, Maggie.”

“I want you to trust me, Joe.”

We ended in stalemate.

Joe went back up to the main house after I shook my head, refusing his offer of continued and generous funding. I tossed under the hot sheets for a few hours and finally gave up. I went out to sit on the porch, praying for even the hint of a cooling breeze in the night air. As much as I hated to admit it, I knew Joe was right. Well… at least in part.

I was behaving childishly, especially by refusing his offer to help. And he was right. Every dollar I turned away came directly out of the mouth of a hungry child. I wanted a life with Joe, and a family of our own someday. With babies to care for, I knew I would be just as fiercely protective as he. I could hardly fault him for that…

I walked out to the old swing, my feet bare in the long grass, and sat in the old wooden seat. I stared at the sky as I moved gently, back and forth. So many memories flooded my mind… I couldn’t imagine a life without him. He’d been the most important person in my life for as long as I could remember. And I couldn’t accept the idea that I might have to make a choice. My work was my purpose, but Joe was my life…

I couldn’t begin to imagine a future in which I’d have to turn my back on either one.