Chapter 22: Johnathan

When the rescue people arrived a few hours later, both Carrie and I were almost, mutually disappointed.

Having had food, water, and sex, we were content to stay there for as long as was necessary. As long as we didn’t run out of snacks and didn’t have to separate, I was fairly content with staying there forever.

It was finally an adventure that both of us obviously needed.

We were together, we were well, if not healthily fed, and we were safe. If we really needed it, we had communications to the outside world and the rangers knew exactly where we were.

So, we were slightly disenchanted when the rangers came pulling up in their all-terrain vehicles, only a few hours after we had settled in.

For the first time, after making love to Carrie, I didn’t feel any guilt. I felt relieved and abundantly content, but the thoughts that had plagued me every time before were now silent.

I supposed the real test would be what I thought and felt once I was alone, but for the time being, I was ready to consider this a win.

However, when the park rangers, along with the paramedics showed up, all I could think about was how I now needed to make my decision…and how I had completely messed up by admitting to Carrie that I loved her.

I wasn’t lying, which was a surprise to me, to find out that I was even capable of loving someone again, but that was what made it so much worse. If I had simply said it in the throes of passion, without meaning it, other than trying to accurately explain what a good fuck that was, things would be different.

However, the fact that I meant those words to the very core of my being was what made this so difficult.

Her answer had made the decision even more of a challenge.

I knew what she was doing. She was trying to save me from herself. While she didn’t want to deny that she loved me, she knew how hard it would be, if I chose not to go with her, especially if she said it aloud.

However, she had, which made the looming separation even harder to accept. I didn’t want to leave her, but I also didn’t want to disappoint her, and I feared that either way, that would be the ultimate result.

I figured I would either disappoint her now, when I returned to my old life, or I would give her false hope by returning to civilization with her and then not being able to succeed.

Knowing that there would be challenges for me that I couldn’t even fathom, even if I felt that I could go without issue now, there was surely going to be something that would throw me for a loop once I started my assimilation.

Since I wasn’t even sure I could succeed with the hurdles I was aware of, I was even more dismayed by the thought of what I else I might come across.

Being a disappointment to her in the middle of nowhere, where she could easily forget me and move on seemed merciful. I didn’t want to be a disappointment to her out in the real world, where she was left with anything to explain.

Yet, I wanted to go with her. I wanted to be the person she seemed to think I could be. I wanted to emulate her strength and take whatever life threw at me like a champ, but she was the only person who ever seemed to believe I could be that way.

I thought about this throughout the time that the paramedics checked me over, while others attended to Carrie. I received some strange looks, but I understood.

After all, I did look like a wild mountain man. I wasn’t insecure enough take the oddity of my appearance to heart. I probably would look at myself strangely too if I were them.

Once we were both cleared, the rangers took us into separate parts of the station and took down our statements.

I wasn’t sure where to start, or exactly what they wanted to know, so I started from the beginning, telling them how I met Cassie, where I was living and what we were doing here at the ranger station.

Again, my responses were met with strange looks, but I took Carrie’s advice and told them the truth, whether they believed me or not.

Eventually, after conferring with one another, keeping us both in separate rooms, they allowed us to see one another again and the head ranger sat down across from us at his desk.

“I’m glad you two are alright. It’s such a shame, what happens to people up here in these mountains sometimes…” The ranger shook his head and pursed his lips, as though he was truly mourning someone in particular.

Carrie and I both agreed with the man.

“Is there traffic going back down the mountain?” I asked, “Someone told me over the radio that there was a mudslide and I just want Cassie to get to a hospital as soon as possible.”

“Yes, Sir, the mudslide has been taken care of and we are going to get you out of here as soon as possible, but considering your statements, I wanted to ask you a few questions, collectively.”

Carrie and I exchanged worried glances, unsure of what he would want out of our statements that couldn’t wait.

However, we agreed.

“Of course,” Carrie added after her nod.

“You both said you saw the man who attacked Carrie?” the ranger asked, getting out the pad and pencil he had used to take notes on previously.

“Yes, we did,” I answered for Carrie, taking a slightly more protective stance over her, in case something was about to happen where I would need to either shield her or get her out of here quickly, “Why?”

Sensing the tension, Carrie grabbed ahold of my arm, nervously.

“Well, I don’t mean to alarm you two,” the ranger answered, putting his hands up, as though trying to convey that he meant us no harm. “We believe the man was apprehended. It was earlier in the week…He tried to attack a woman a little closer to the normal trail and she got away. She identified him in a lineup and after doing a little digging, we found out that he recently purchased some distressing items from the local hardware store.”

“Did you find them?” I asked the ranger, starting to settle down slightly, but still not completely convinced that this conversation was going to end well.

“No, we haven’t. He didn’t have anything on him when we arrested him and, even though we found the receipt for the items in question, we didn’t find any of the items.”

“I think I know where you can find them. Were they a knife, duct tape, rope, and Diazepam?”

Now, it was the ranger who was a little taken back.

“I found a bag at the place where he and Carrie last set up camp, the night he attacked her.”

“Do you have the bag?”

“Hell, no. I didn’t want to be caught with a murder bag like that,” I insisted, but realizing that I probably shouldn’t be so blunt, I added in a more reserved tone, “But, if you want, I can point out where I found them on a map…or I can take you to it.” I shrugged, “The last time I saw it was a while ago, I can’t guarantee it’s still there, but I want it to be found.”

“You can pinpoint it on the map?” The ranger insisted, and I affirmed it with a nod.

With that, the man took out a map of the area and asked me to show him where it was. I circled the area, knowing exactly where the cabin was and using my knowledge of the surrounding mountainside to give an estimate that I was confident was accurate.

“In this clearing, you’ll find a broken tent and a tent that is still intact. Inside the tent that is intact, there should be the bag.”

“Thank you,” the ranger insisted, calling over one of the other rangers and asking them to check this area out right away.

After the other ranger left, with the map, his superior turned back to us.

“Hopefully, we’ll find the items on the receipt and that’ll be even more evidence against him,” he insisted, “But, for my initial questions…” he redirected the conversation quickly, “First, Carrie, I wanted to know if you wanted to press charges and I wanted to ask you both if you were willing to testify against the guide.”

“Wait, you caught him? He’s in jail?” Carrie seemed not only surprised, but relieved and kind of lost. “I’m sorry, I didn’t see any of that. He attacked me…He did use the Diazepam on me though, I think. He tried to give me something that knocked me out.”

“Did you tell the paramedics?”

Carrie nodded, “But, getting back to what you said, you caught him?”

Again, she seemed surprised and honestly, I couldn’t blame her.

Usually, what happens in the mountains stays in the mountains, unless there was an extremely good reason it wouldn’t, so it was an unlikely surprise to find out that he was caught.

The ranger nodded, “Now, the only reason I ask you this here, is so that when we get back down the mountain, you aren’t pressured into a decision. I want you to know that while he isn’t a danger to society anymore, you will have to be in the same room with him, while you testify and if you press charges, it might be a long process, but if you were willing to testify, at least, you would be getting justice for yourself, in addition to helping get justice for everyone and anyone he might have hurt in the past…and this could also prevent him from hurting anyone in the future.”

“Of course. Definitely,” Carrie insisted, now coming out from behind me fully for the first time.

“Yes, I would like to testify too. I want everyone to know what that bastard tried to do,” I insisted.

“Okay, then,” the ranger nodded as he tipped his hat and stood up, “Now that we’ve got all that unpleasant business out of the way, let’s get you two back to civilization.”

It was then that my stomach dropped. Instinctually, I looked at Carrie, who was staring back at me, with an odd expression.

I knew this was the time to decide, though I there were still so many factors floating around in my mind.

The conversation about the psycho guide had distracted me for a few moments but now that time had run out and I had to make a choice, I had wished that I had given it more thought.

Although, I doubted more thought was what I needed.

We must have stared at one another for a good minute, while the ranger looked between us, wondering what the issue was.

“Are you both okay?” The ranger finally asked, “Is there a problem?”

“He lives in the woods. In his grandfather’s cabin…” Carrie spoke up first, breaking the connection of our eyes to look at the ranger.

“Oh!” The ranger replied, though he still looked slightly confused as to why this was such a big decision, “Well, Sir, if you’d like to get a ride back to the cabin, I can definitely get someone to drive you back. That isn’t an issue. It explains why you know the mountain so well, though.” The ranger insisted, looking me up and down now, as though he was attempting to figure out my story.

I know he didn’t trust me, but I didn’t blame him. I didn’t trust him either.

With that, Carrie returned her gaze to mine and grinned. I felt her hands clasp solidly around mine as she exclaimed, “Johnathan, remember what I said. I am willing to give you time. My door is always open. It’s always your decision. I am not going to force you into doing anything.”

It was with that comment, that I decided to finally take a leap of faith.

“No, thank you,” I told the ranger, “I’m going to go down the mountain with Carrie.” Afterward, I looked over to Carrie and beamed meaningfully, “We started this adventure together, and I trust that’s the way we’re going to finish it.”