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Gripp: Hey, how r u?

Me: Fine

Gripp: You wanna meet?

Me: No

Gripp: I’m out front waiting for Sophie. Come say hi?

Me: I’m at Uni

Gripp: Thinking of me?

Me: Yes

Really? I couldn’t lie to that one because I was so wound up over him, he was all I could think of.

Gripp: U can’t ignore me foreva

Me: I can

Gripp: Fancy a drink?

Me: I’m sleeping

Gripp: Coffee?

Me: No

Gripp: I’m out clubbing. Wanna meet?

Me: Have Uni in the morning

Gripp: Got a new tat. Wanna see

Me: U have skin left to ink?

Gripp: U gonna answer anytime soon?

Me: I am now

Gripp: You ashamed?

Me: No

His accusation in front of everyone had pissed me off. I had zero hesitation answering.

Gripp: My sister looks good

Me: I make her eat

Gripp: U wanna fuck? I’m so fucking horny thinking about ur tight arse

Me: I’m horny thinking about shoving my dick down your throat

Me: ‘Attachment’

Yeah, I sent him a dick pic. No point pretending anymore. I wanted another go around. I wanted the bad boy.

* * *

“So, you and my brother, huh?” I didn’t know where to put myself when Sophie collared me in the kitchen later and asked me what I had anticipated was coming. “Look. I’m not mad, okay. I know he’s gay. Why he stays in the closet. He’s not a bad guy, he’s just in a situation that’s not easy to get out of. He has an image to keep, and liking men is not part of it.”

“I get that. It was a one-time thing. Nothing to it, just a heated moment,” I lied. Because I was lying to both her and myself.

“He didn’t like Jake kissing you.”

“No, I guess he didn’t” Wasn’t that the truth?

“You gonna see him again?”

“I dunno, Sophie.” I wanted to and once I’d admitted it, the idea of me and Gripp didn’t look so awful. Maybe it was just what I needed; the hot curl of sexual attraction between us, getting off for a bit with one another. I was cool with it. I was young, he was someone I could get over. I wasn’t so deep in I couldn’t walk away unscathed once we’d had some fun.

“You should,” she winked, looking silly in the attempt.

“It wouldn’t bother you?” I had to ask. In the back of my head, her opinion mattered far more than a bit of sex. Even damned good sex.

“Nah. I think you would probably do him the world of good.”

I didn’t see it. We ran in very different circles, his wasn’t one I was interested in at all, nor to be a part of. Shaun and I would never work based on social differences alone. “He’s been asking to meet. I’ve been ignoring his texts until today.”

“Oh, he messages you?” Her eyebrows went up a fraction. “You don’t answer? That’s pretty rude.”

“I answered them all this afternoon.”

“Why now?”

“Because he asked. Said please, too. I couldn’t resist that fucking word.”

She laughed loud, her eyes not as red as earlier. “Ha, ha. I totally get that!”

“You talk to Jake?”

Sophie sighed. “Yeah. He’s okay but this is a lot for either of us to take in. I’m surprised my brother stayed so calm. Maybe you being there stopped him in his tracks?”

I didn’t answer and changed the subject yet again. “I shouldn’t have punched Jake.”

“No, you shouldn’t have. It’s not any one person’s fault. You need to apologise.”

“I will.” He’d hold no bad blood, but my actions still weren’t sitting right. My own conduct had stunned me, I had never been trigger happy in that sense. “We have to sit down and make some plans, Sophie.”

“Yeah, I know. Just not right now. I need to get my head around this pregnancy first.”

Totally reasonable. “Come here,” I beckoned her over. She came into my arms and held on when I wrapped her in a tight hug. “Things will work out. I promise. It won’t be so bad, you’ll see.”