––––––––

Two and a half hours.

I didn’t want to be an overbearing twat, but Sophie and Jake had been gone two and a half hours. Considering what her brother had said about wanting to get out of his life, I wasn’t all right with them being gone so long and not knowing where they were. They’d said they’d be an hour. How much shit did Sophie have to pack, when it seemed most of her stuff was already in the Loft? Jake had talked me into letting him take Sophie to collect the last of her belongings. I’d handed over the car keys reluctantly with assurances from Sophie that all would be well. There’d be no problems.

So, where the fuck were they?

I’d texted Jake fifteen minutes earlier and the prick hadn’t replied. I decided another ten minutes and I’d call one of them.

We were heading down to Beaufort in the morning, my dad saying that he and Laura would love to have us all over the holidays. I’d explained Sophie was pregnant and she needed a time out to make some decisions and to come to terms with the change her life had taken. My dad was quiet at the news, stating they would help with whatever Sophie needed, I had never doubted the offer wouldn’t come. I hadn’t divulged Jake was the father, wasn’t my admission to tell and I felt Jake owed it to my dad to tell him face to face, so I’d left the information out, and he’d never asked. I figured Laura and Taylor would most likely fawn all over Sophie and mother her, but maybe that’s what she needed because I knew she’d never had it in her past. There had been no mother figure growing up, just Shaun, and their brother while he was alive, and an apparently deadbeat dad who hadn’t stuck around for long. Beaufort was just what she needed.

Tapping my phone against my lips, I just about had a heart attack when it pinged.

Jake: Took Sophie for food. At cinema. Will do flat next week

Reading his message, I flopped onto the sofa, reassured both were fine. I hadn’t wanted to acknowledge the errant thoughts racing through my head. Shaun didn’t live in a very good area, some of the guys her brother ran around with weren’t all that pleasant by Sophie’s own admission, and it had me paranoid someone would try to start something with Jake, an unknown bloke with Shaun’s sister.

I burst out laughing in the quiet room, bet they were watching Thor.

Flicking on the tv, a night of mindless drivel would do me wonders, maybe even send me to sleep. I’d been a lazy arse all day, lying in bed, reading and playing stupid games on my phone. Funny how tiring doing nothing all day was. I found tv monotonous at the best of times, and I blessedly needed some of it.

My phone chimed another message and when I reached for it, I was surprised to see it was Shaun. I’d changed his name in my contacts, Gripp still leaving a sour taste in my mouth.

Shaun: Want some company? Might b last night I can c u 4 a while.

I knew what he meant. His plan was going ahead, he was making his moves soon. I had no illusions if he came around, I’d have him buck naked and doing all sorts of things I couldn’t speak aloud, not snuggling to sleep with him, no way. We would be a sweaty mess of exhaustion and bliss when we finally tumbled into slumber. Better than mind numbing tv any day.

Me: Yeah, sure. S & J at movies. Loft is clear.

Shaun: Not worried. Wanna c u.

He’d just left this morning, the fact he wanted to see me again so soon softened my attitude toward him, especially after that afternoon’s run in with the Chrissie woman.

Me: Come over.

Jumping from the couch, I gave the place a once over to make sure it was tidy, not that it would matter to him, but still. I’d changed the sheets on my bed that morning, not wanting to lay about in cum stains and sweat all afternoon. Sniffing my armpits, I decided I was clean enough, no need to jump in a shower.

I was like a girl. So utterly ridiculous.

Fifteen minutes later the buzzer went, and I sauntered to the door like I had no care in the world and wasn’t gagging to get my hands on Shaun’s body. My nerves had morphed in a way I couldn’t explain and when he banged the front door, I jumped although I was expecting it. The possibility of getting some dick action took a dive and I admitted to myself it was just Shaun. All Shaun. The man who pulled my sensibility in all directions, seeing him again had my heart racing a marathon as it pounded wildly in my chest.

Throwing the door open, my eyes travelled the length of the man I wanted to get down on my knees for. He stood there, hands in his pockets, his flat cap low on his face so I couldn’t see his eyes. When he did look up, his face screamed sex and lust, his lips begging to be devoured. I grabbed at his coat and tugged him inside the Loft, not bothering to close the door before I had my mouth on his and was nudging him back against the hallway wall.

Inhaling heartily, his hands seized my waist before he drew away from me. “Fuck, Ayden...” He bumped his forehead against mine. “I didn’t come here for sex, but I’m not gonna say no.”

Kicking my foot out and banging the front door shut, I physically dragged him toward my room, not stopping to be a good host and offer him something to drink. Pushing at his chest when his legs hit the back of my bed, he fell backward managing to get his hands behind him so he wasn’t laying completely flat. Towering over Shaun, he tipped his head to look up at me, a cheeky grin gracing his face.

“What you got in mind?”

A shyness came over me from fuck knew where when I turned and softly closed the door. The bedside lamp was already on, I didn’t bother with the dimmer this time. “You gonna be gone a while?”

“Yeah,” he sighed, sitting up fully, opening his legs wider. A silent invite to move closer, I shuffled between his knees and knocked the cap from his head.

“Then I want it all. Everything.” I knew what I wanted from him, how I felt about him. I didn’t even feel silly that I was half way in love with a man I hardly knew. I’d given voice to my desires, jumped all in and I wanted to hear the same from him. It was scary as fuck, but man, it all felt so right. Like he was meant to be in my life, like I was meant for him, and he was meant for me. The way I thought about him was so big I simply couldn’t fathom walking away from what we’d started. If he was going to make the effort, I was going to make it too. We both had tough questions to answer in the future but now was not the time.

Shaun’s eyes gave a hint of uncertainty when I looked down at him. “What do you mean everything?”

Fisting my hand in his hair, I leant down to plant a soft kiss on his head. “You know damned well what I mean. I want all of you.”

He laid his cheek against my stomach, I could feel his breath through the thin cotton of my t-shirt as he breathed slowly. Sighing, he gripped my waist in a tight hold, like he needed me to ground him. “Okay,” he conceded, his words shaky, “but I’m struggling here. I don’t know how far to let you in before you get scared off. I’m not a nice guy.”

Never afraid of speaking his mind, I wasn’t a bit surprised by his confession. Twice now he’d said those very same words and twice now I’d chosen to ignore them, see beyond his self-depreciation.

Shaun’s hands shook as he snaked them under my t-shirt, his rough palms skating across my skin made me shiver. I loosened my fist in his hair and stroked through his short strands, loving the texture. The position we were in soothed and settled me.

“You need assurances from me, Ayden. I understand that, fuck I do. But I have none to give you. I’m not a heart on my sleeve kind of guy, not all love hearts and roses. I’m rough, I’m nasty, I’m unkind, will hold you at arm’s length given half the chance. But here I am laying it out for you, wanting to promise you a world I don’t have to give. Never will have.”

“You haven’t laid anything out. I can’t even begin to read you. I don’t have a clue what this is for you.” I said in agitation. “I’m all up for fucking but if that’s all this is gonna be, you get one night - tonight - and that’s all. I can’t fall for someone to have them walk away. And Shaun, I make no mistake when I tell you I really could fall for you.”

He took his arms from me, and I sank to my knees, so we were eye level with one another. Equals. No one lording over the other.

“This could be good, this thing between us. I can’t promise you any tomorrows or days after, as much as I’d like to. We both know it’s foolish. I can promise you now. Only now. Anything...everything, I won’t walk away,” he breathed then snorted a laugh like what he was saying was somehow funny to him, “hell, I can’t walk away. I don’t want to. Maybe we can figure this out as we go, that could be fun, right?”

I grinned at him. “Yeah, it would. So much fun.”

Shaun squeezed my hands I’d placed on top of his thighs. I had to close my eyes to calm down before I pounced on him and collapsed into his body. I’d wait for him, as much time as he needed to catch up, I’d wait. Because men like Shaun were few and far between, no matter what he thought of himself. There was no rhyme or reason as to why we fell in love with someone. I’d no doubt his life so far had been questionable, but he was telling me he was trying to change, to live better. One I’d love to share with him.

“Jesus. You scare me to death, Ayden. I always win, yet here I am petrified of defeat, of losing you already.”

Smiling discretely, I knew a good thing when I saw it, Shaun was a good thing. His shoulders slumped, and he hunched over as he gave way to his insecurities.

“Whatever you want. You’re right, it’s worth exploring.” I smiled so hard at his words, my face threatening to split in half. “We’ll work out the kinks as we go.” When I winked at him, he let out a loud belly laugh and pulled me from the floor, over the top of him. We fell back on the bed, a tangle of limbs, and I swooped in to devour his mouth, my mood up tempo for now.

Shaun trembled beneath me, his legs jumpy, a tell-tale sign that belied the nerves he was trying to hide. I ran my hand down his chest, holding myself up on my elbow above him. The anticipation of fucking him running to the front of my head again. Pushing the collar of his coat aside, I nibbled at his neck, my hand slipping further down his body, unfastening his coat, unveiling a body I loved; all sinewy muscle, rigid and tight. His taut stomach pleaded for the slip of a tongue when I unbuttoned his shirt and moved the material aside.

Worshipped. He had a body that asked to be worshipped, and that was exactly what I planned to do. Although I couldn’t see much of his pinked skin beneath the mass of black covering him, the heat beneath my hand was enough to tell me he was sizzling with arousal.

I stepped away to discard my own clothes, not looking at Shaun as I shed every stitch I had on before resuming my position above him. I grabbed the shoulders of his coat and wrestled him from the heavy wool, throwing it behind me when I eventually got it loose.

“Move off a second...” Shaun’s impatience won out as he sat up and rapidly undressed. I watched each item hitting my floor, my mouth watering more and more as he slowly unveiled his body. When he lay back down on the bed, he was utterly naked, and I couldn’t help eye fucking him and licking at my suddenly parched lips.

His dick was standing proud. He wasn’t huge but plenty big enough to stretch my mouth when I sucked him down my throat, deciding that was first order of the night. Shimmying down his body, I stuck my tongue over his flushed cock head and watched it spring back against his belly when his legs tensed underneath me. Running my palm up the flat of his stomach, up and up until I was toying with his distended nipple, tugging the small bobble of flesh, I sighed with content.

I wanted to simply drive into him, spread him wide and fuck him until I lost my mind. Removing my hand, I stretched my fingers wide on the way back down to his abdomen, grazing lower still. I tucked my fingers beneath him and fondled his balls making Shaun arch from the bed when I applied pressure.

He’d flung his arms wide and was clenching the duvet in his hands when I demanded he looked at me, wanting him to see exactly what he did, how riled up he got me. Pushing up onto my knees between his legs, I stuck my fingers into his open mouth, making him suck. Still pulling at his sack, I rolled his balls, taking my now wet fingers and sliding them between his arse cheeks, using my wrist to let him know I wanted his legs wider. Wanted him spread out. He did so instantly, and as I slid my fingers over his hole, my own dick twitched with eagerness. Teasing my fingertip inside, a raspy moan let loose when he bucked into me, his body swallowing my finger to the knuckle in one swift move.

Leaning over I bit at his bottom lip, pressing my dick against my hand and diving into a kiss so fucking hot it nearly undid me. I slipped my finger in and out of him, a second joining and delving deeper, harder. And he took it, rose up and down with the same rhythm my hand worked him, long heavy moans making me goddamned crazy.

“I want you to fuck me, Shaun. Right now,” I all but growled when his arms circled my neck, the urgency in him as evident as mine while he twisted his legs around my waist.

“Ugh...keep doing that a minute...”

I rotated my fingers and scissored them wide, pulling in and out. “More?” I husked out, hoping like fuck I was reading him right. He gulped, his Adam’s apple bobbing as I teased another digit into him, twisting and turning gently until all three fingers were forced inside. My cock wept pre-come, dribbled in pearled strings down onto Shaun’s stomach. His breaths were shallow and tight against my body as he adjusted to the intrusion.

“Oh man, that’s so fucking good...” he trailed off, digging blunt fingernails into my shoulders. I loved the sight of a half-gone Shaun, losing his mind under my hands. I’d never seen anything so captivating.

Time to see what really rocked his world.

Pumping in and out of him, not exactly careful, I watched Shaun’s reactions spread across his face as his grimace turned to pleasure and his eyes rolled. He was panting and bucking underneath me at the same pace as I fucked him with my fingers, I was afraid he was going to come before the fun really got started.

“Shaun, baby, you gonna fuck me?” I wasn’t playing nice anymore, I removed my fingers then tumbled off to his side, looking over at him. “No fingers, no mouth. Just your cock all up in me, yeah?”

Not wanting to explain how I liked to fuck, how I liked to experience a bit of pain as someone rammed me from behind, I groaned instead. It was better he figured it out for himself. He rolled half way over me, his thigh nudging between mine, his weight grounding me. Then he moved all the way over, pushing me into the mattress, our dicks lining up against each other, impossibly hard.

“Neither?” he asked, sifting fingers through my hair with one hand and reaching out for the lube I’d left on the nightstand earlier with the other.

“No. I like things a little rougher, get off on a bit of pain.”

“I don’t wanna hurt you, Ayden,” he said.

“You won’t.” It was a sweet gesture, the concern, but he really needn’t have bothered, and he’d soon find out. If it didn’t hurt, it wasn’t good for me. Give me some pain and I shot for those stars every fucking time. No point in beating around the bush about my sexual preferences. “Rough sex is my kink, I guess.” I grinned at him. “So, hurry up and stick your fucking cock in me. Ride me hard.”

He laughed out loud, “oh, you are something else, this is gonna be some ride.”

Shaun fumbled around with a condom he’d found by the lube and I watched with greedy eyes when he concentrated on rolling it down his stiff shaft. Picking up the bottle, he squirted more onto the palm of his hand then stroked himself while he drizzled the cold liquid down my balls. The lube seeped down my crack, my anticipation almost unbearable. I couldn’t watch, the tease agonising.

Moving quickly, he shoved my legs wider and up a bit, rubbing his dick up against me. His knees nudged at the insides of my thighs again and I pulled my legs as wide as they could go, relishing in the heat of Shaun’s slippery hands as they clutched the tops of my thighs, his thumbs digging into soft flesh underneath. Sucking in a deep breath, I waited.

“Ready?” 

Fisting my cock, I gripped the base, hoping I didn’t shoot the minute he breached me. It was a distinct possibility I was so riled up and horny, aching to come. “Yeah,” I gritted out. I needed all my control and concentration to make this last more than some measly minutes. Getting so lost in myself, I flinched when Shaun shoved his dick in me. No messing around, a straight shove right in.

“Argh...” I shouted at the top of my voice, almost lifting my whole body from the bed. A blissful, piercing pain raged at me from the inside out and it felt so glorious I needed to jack off and come that instant. With my hand moving furiously over my dick and Shaun stock still, balls to the wall, my skin prickled, my mouth clamped shut, and an orgasmic zing shot through my nerves. His thick cock stretched me wide and right then I knew one night would never be enough with him. He was simply addictive.

“Leave your dick alone.” Pulling back, Shaun thrust into me all over again. I kind of snorted, half laughed, half something else, I wasn’t sure what. There was nothing gentle about this man, and I loved it. “I want the same,” he clenched through his teeth.

Giving one last stroke, I let go of my poor, needy cock then stretched my arms above me, taking hold of the headboard for leverage. Holding on for the ride, so to speak.

Shaun did not disappoint. Not in any way. His pace was consistent, and not a pansy arsed one either. Long strokes, forceful strokes, bottoming painfully each time. His grunts and moans as he went to town on me were like sweet music to my ears. I liked to hear it, listen to the man fucking me, enjoying himself as much as I was.

The bite of pain subsided too quickly, and I egged Shaun on, that pre-orgasmic bliss winding and winding inside, like a tightly wound elastic band, ready to snap. With a little more effort, he’d have me crying in ecstasy in no time.

“Come on.” I flexed my arms against the headboard, meeting his thrusts. “Fuck me good, give me what you have.”

Shaun stopped, he fucking stopped! Giving me a cheeky grin, he rotated his hips in a slow roll that felt like all my dreams had come true. The tautness in my balls intensified, the ache in my cock blindsided me and I had to scramble to circle my fingers around the root to stem the cum threatening to spill.

“Jesus fucking Christ!” I swore, sweat erupting across my head, around my neck.

Pulling my knees to my chest, the captivating man above splayed me wider, angling himself differently, so much deeper than before, the shift drawing a low moan from the bottom of my chest. I could feel him getting thicker inside me and when he rolled his hips again, he clenched his eyes shut, the strangled look on his face perfection. Dragging backwards, he surged forward again, faster, with a fierceness I’d never felt before, he kept coming at me until I was crying out, the words jumbled but necessary.

He finally lost control. His neck muscles corded as he set a punishing pace, a battering from the inside out. With an almighty roar, Shaun pulled out and ripped off the condom, scurrying up my body so his knees were under my armpits, his legs aside my chest. Pumping his cock millimetres from my face, he slapped a hand against the wall and tipped his head back.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, so good, so fucking good...ahhh! Ugh...”

Thick, long, creamy jets of cum splattered onto my face and neck, dribbling down my throat. It was a waste of good semen if you asked me. Opening my mouth wide, I stuck out my tongue as Shaun angled my way and kept shooting his load, painting my tongue. Stroking out the last of his seed, his grunts became whimpers, his strokes languid, his tensed legs softened. I could see all the emotions running rampant within him as he slowly emptied the last of himself and climbed down from his high.

There was nothing more beautiful. Shaun was a sight for sore, sore eyes. My heart ached when I saw the wonder cross his face, his lazy eyes looking down at me.

Resting his half-spent cock against my lips, I sucked the sensitive head, lapping up the cum that had been left behind. Thumping on the wall, he barely managed to talk while he tried to catch himself. “Fucking hell,” he wheezed out. His softening cock slipped down my chin and he laughed. “We’re gonna be doing a lot more of that, Ayden.”

Shifting his legs downwards, Shaun collapsed in a spent heap on top of me, tucking his head into the soaked crook of my neck, licking at some of his cum and sucking my skin.

“You okay there?” I asked.

“Mmmhhmm,” he mumbled, sounding sleepy. “Gimme a minute, yeah?”

“All the time in the world.”

I hoped my words were true, I certainly meant them. I didn’t want this to be the one and only time I got to spend with Shaun. The future without him didn’t look so bright, nor fun. I guessed only time would tell.