––––––––

On the verge of coming, by fuck was I ready. I needed to stop, needed Ayden inside me so I could sail away on the blissful tide one last time before reality burst my bubble. I hadn’t been sure I’d ever wanted to bottom until I met Ayden, but since I had, and given him that part of me, I wanted it again and again. Didn’t figure I’d like it so much but there I was, demanding he fucked me.

Maybe it was just him? Just Ayden?

I didn’t care enough about still being tender from earlier, because I knew in no time at all, Ayden was going to give me so much pleasure, I’d lose myself to him once more.

The view behind me was obscured, yet I knew it held reverence for him as his eyes kept shifting over my shoulder. This felt so damned right it almost took my breath away, I couldn’t imagine being anywhere other than right where I was. This moment, the now, was a game changer. He was a game changer and I could no longer deny it, nor run from it. Being together was more, Ayden was more. I wanted his heart and his soul, I wanted him to be mine.

Straining my legs over the arms of the recliner, I hooked them around the back of the chair as best I could, Ayden clutching me while I held onto his neck, his beautiful cock waiting between us. Greedy for him, I shifted forward, could feel him poking at my backside. The excitement was almost too much, too overwhelming, but I continued because there was nothing else for it. I didn’t go slow, didn’t wait for him, just sank my body downwards and forced myself upon him. His fingers dug deep into my hip bones when he pushed upwards on a sigh, impaling me.

“Arghhh...” I hissed, shivers piercing through me, my heart in my throat. “Fuck...”

Ayden’s head was tipped back, his Adam’s apple protruding, and his teeth dug deep into his plump bottom lip. With eyes screwed shut, I’d never seen anything so blissful. He didn’t make a sound, didn’t move as the moment of connection rolled over and swallowed us both. I savoured the headiness, let it sink in then kissed Ayden’s throat, a silent signal to move. His composure fled, even though I could see him trying to rein it in. I didn’t want that, no, I wanted him to lose his fucking mind in the same way I was sure going to. I’d only scratched the surface of this man, the eagerness to drag it all from him, came sharp.

“Move,” I growled. Going slow was not on the cards for me, no matter what Ayden wanted to teach. I wanted him to fuck me, and I couldn’t wait a second longer.

Taut thighs rippled beneath me as he canted his lower body up and down, moving in and out of me in a quick rhythm. He used his feet against the floor for purchase, while I used his neck, and between us managed a deeply satisfying sequence of movements. Suspended over the chair, my legs burned with the effort of trying to hold my position, but every time Ayden’s cock rubbed over my gland, my whole body sang like a hummingbird, rapid beats of wings came thick and fast through my chest.

“Shaun...” he called out, his voice an echo through the otherwise quiet room. His movements slowed as he slung his strong arms around my waist and pulled me flush against his chest. “You feel like nothing I’ve ever had before.”

Tugging the hair at the nape of his neck, I ground up and down as best I could. Amazing was too weak a word to describe what he did to me, to envelop the feelings of intensity and love caressing the very blackest parts of my soul. Sucking in a loud breath, my cock ached with every rub against his chest, and I climbed higher and higher, riding the cusp of an impending orgasm.

Ayden upped his tempo, never letting go, keeping us crushed together, as he fucked me. He held nothing back and the realisation he was giving me his all became too much. My orgasm snuck up on me, cum spilling, the warmth of the fluid delicious between us. I watched with rapt awe as I spewed my seed across his chest, dribbles of cum leaking at a steady pace, my balls tightening with each release. It felt like there would be no end. I was at his mercy as he shoved in and out harder than before.

“I’m coming. Jesus Christ!” Ayden shouted gruffly. Another two or three punishing thrusts and he was there, calling my name as he ruptured inside of me. “Shaun...Shaun...”

After some unfathomable time, we both stilled, my cock long depleted of cum, his body quiet and soft beneath mine. We both panted in tandem, heads against one another, clutching close and grinning. I couldn’t let go, didn’t want to. Everything I desired sat tangled up around me in a chair too small for us, a sweaty, exhausted mess.

This was it.

Ayden, only Ayden.

He sighed, depositing a quick kiss to the bottom of my throat while I wound my hands through the damp mess of his hair. My high was dissolving, legs cramping, and I was hurtling back to earth at a rapid rate. “I need to move.”

Laughing, he lifted me up and I ungracefully pulled my legs from the arms of the chair then slid down into his lap, continuing to the floor between his legs. Within seconds he was pushing me flat and laying on top of me.

“Perfect,” he whispered, peppering kisses all over my face, “just perfect.”

My heart was too full, as if it would burst into a million pieces and shatter if I had to move from where I was. I tipped my head backwards and searched for the glistening lights of the sleeping city, wondering if anyone else out there, still awake at this time, was feeling how I was.

Like they’d come home.

Like their world would never be the same again. Like the tides had changed and there was no going back.

Fear registered in the depths of my contentment when I understood I had more to lose than Sophie. I was always a great believer in what would be would be, but only I could change my future. Only I could turn my life around.

I was coming back for him without a shadow of a doubt. A better man, a worthy man.

“Perfect,” I agreed.

* * *

Waking up wrapped around Ayden was bittersweet. The highlight of what was sure to be a shitty day, the highlight of many days to come I was certain. He had his legs tangled in mine and his head tucked into my shoulder. We’d climbed back into bed at some point after making love in front of the window, both moving in sync with one another, not a word spoken, then promptly passing out.

But hell, it was warm. Ayden was sleeping sound and of course, I’d woken with a stiffy like us guys always did. Thinking back to all the sex from the night before, I reckoned it would be a while before my morning wood deflated enough to show my face outside Ayden’s bedroom door. I rubbed my body against him watching as he stirred but didn’t wake.

I could have done with some mouth action to get this crap day started. Actually, no...I could have done with staying right there in bed for an eternity if Ayden stayed too. It would’ve been fine by me. I closed my weary eyes and laid there peacefully until a soft knock interrupted my thoughts of nothingness, rousing me from a semi slumber.

Sophie popped her head around the door. “Morning, Shaun,” she mumbled quietly. “He still asleep?”

I coughed as gently as I could, embarrassed she’d caught me in her best friend’s bed. By the non-surprise on her face, she knew fine well I’d stayed, probably from the amount of noise we’d made. I flushed crimson, heat crawling up my face. “Ah, yeah.” I made to move away from Ayden and get up.

“No, no...don’t.” She waved her hand at me. “I’m just popping some breakfast on. I wanted to talk with him, but it can wait.” Looking around the room, she smirked cheekily. “You had fun I take it?”

Ayden stirred beside me, letting out a groggy moan, and poking me with his hard on as he tightened his legs around mine. “Fucking nice...” he mumbled, “...suck it, baby.” Sophie laughed and wisely ducked back out of the room, closing the door behind her. “Was that Sophie?” His sleep addled voice sounded cute as fuck.

“Yeah, she’s making breakfast. You wanna get up?”

His arms went around me, and he sucked my neck, rubbing against me. “In a minute.” Suddenly a different kind of breakfast watered my mouth. Reaching down, I fondled him gently not sure how sensitive he was after the night before. I knew my dick was a bit tender, so his was bound to be too. “Mmm, harder.” I guessed that answered my query.

“You gonna keep your mouth shut and let me have some sausage for breakfast?” I chuckled at the corny line I’d delivered.

“Yeah,” he breathed, all hot and warm and ready for the taking when he flopped fully onto his back.

I disappeared under the covers. Licking and sucking down his body as I went then engulfed his erection with my mouth. Kneeling over him, I curled fingers around his root and took him deep, dragging my tongue down the thick vein on the underside. I didn’t let him control it this time, when he started rocking his hips, I pushed him down with my palm over his abdomen. Sleepy moans were muffled from the top of the duvet as he weaved his fingers in my short hair, a move I was really starting to like, and associate with Ayden’s more nurturing side. I loved it, always made me feel serene.

“Jesus...not long...”

Doubling my efforts, I had him right where I wanted him, not so interested in coming myself, wanting to give Ayden the only thing I had for now. I sucked harder when his head thickened against the roof of my mouth and it became impossible to leave myself alone. I could feel the trickle of his cum releasing on my tongue and it was enough to change my mind about getting off. When it came more violently I sat up, the duvet pooling behind me and Ayden spilling over my hand and his pubes. I worked my cock, never taking my eyes from the mess on his body, the twitch of his dick with each spurt that erupted, the sight proving too much. I did the same; jets stroked across his stomach as I let out a ragged moan and collapsed upon him mid orgasm, grinding against him as our juices mixed and everything fell into a heightened sensitivity that made me want to pull that duvet back over my head and never come out.

“Best way to wake up.” His grin was wide on his face. Mission accomplished. Pleased man, sausage for breakfast.

* * *

“So, what you doing today, Shaun?” Sophie asked.

I smirked around the bacon I was chomping on whilst I thought back to who I was doing about half an hour earlier. Then my smug little grin vanished when I thought about the wheels that were going to be set in motion at some point that day. I had a pick up through the week, and I wasn’t sure if I could get my head in the game enough to keep Charlie from seeing I was off with the whole thing. It was nothing compared to where Ryder was taking me as soon as he texted. God, I was dreading it. I didn’t often have to face up to my actions, never really apologised but fuck if this guy didn’t deserve some boot licking at least.

“I have some shit to get done. Just waiting on a call.” I looked to Ayden as he ducked his head.

“Don’t you dare bring your crap to this door, Shaun Jessop! You hear me?”  Sophie glared at me, her back rigid, her breakfast pushed away from her. Jake had yet to make an appearance for which I was thankful for. I was just about to get a dressing down in front of Ayden, he was enough of an audience. “I know you guys are messing around, and I’m cool with it, but I won’t be if your shit taints him, Shaun. I bloody well mean it. I’ll disown you quicker than the coke fucking Boomer shoves up his nose!”

Woah...okay, dirty laundry was being thrown about.

“Sophie...” I was trying to be a good guy, do the right thing. I couldn’t tell her the details, the less she knew the better. I shouldn’t have even been in the flat, Ryder had told me to steer clear, yet there I was because I was too fucking greedy, being the usual selfish prick I was, wanting a piece of Ayden. I sickened myself.

My mood turned. “It won’t, Sophie.” I tried to sound confident, knowing I couldn’t guarantee a thing. The only saving grace I had was Ayden taking her away for a few weeks. Having no doubt shit would hit the fan, the further away she was the better.

“My dad’s looking forward to us coming down,” Ayden steered to conversation to safer waters, exactly where my mind had been before.

“You’re all going?”

“Yeah. Jake’s like part of the family. Adopted son kind of thing. My dad loves him to bits.”

A pang of longing hit my chest and that fucker hurt. Gulping down the suddenly dry toast I figured enough was enough, I’d taken a battering already, I wasn’t looking for more. His innocent comment brought up thoughts of my own father and the coward he was, how he could so easily turn his back on me, on Sophie. Fathers were meant to be there, through thick and thin. Ours ran, kept on running. Never looked back or thought a single second about what he was leaving behind. Ayden’s dad clearly had love in spades to give, whereas mine had dished out nothing but loathing and contempt.

My phone pinged in my pocket, in timely fashion if you asked me, I needed to get the fuck out of Ayden’s flat and sort out the mess of my life. I didn’t even bother reaching to look at the text, I knew who it was, and it was time to leave.

“I need to get going. Got shit to do.” Ayden’s hunched shoulders told me all I needed to know. Disappointment tainted the air for many reasons, not just that it was time to go.

I scraped my chair across the tiled floor and got up from the table. Depositing my coffee cup and the remnants of breakfast at the kitchen sink, I paused with my back to the room, heaving in the last taste of freedom and safety I dared.

Time’s up, Gripp.

The next time I saw my sister and Ayden, things would be very different, for good or for bad. Here’s hoping I came out the other end in one piece.

* * *

Leaving the Loft was a sting in the tail. I hugged Sophie far tighter than I normally would yet couldn’t bring myself to get lost in the chaste kiss goodbye that Ayden offered. His whispered ‘be careful’ as he linked his fingers with mine, did not fall on deaf ears and almost had me retreating to the sanctuary his room offered.

Almost - I’d achieve nothing burying my head in the sand.

I was on the way to face the first of the many mistakes I’d made and was genuinely sorry for. Ryder was chirpy when I sullenly climbed into his truck half an hour later, his happy go lucky attitude grating on my nerves. I was just about to put my whole life on the line and he was chuckling about Sunday bloody drivers. The closer to Beaufort we got, the sicker I felt.

“Tell me about your pick up this week. You normally do that kind of thing?”

The change in conversation and his serious mood suited me fine. “Yeah. I rarely do the runs, but Charlie has me collecting, knows I don’t take the crap. I don’t often use my fists, don’t need to, usually got two or three other blokes with me. Charlie’s goons, thick as mince so they are, don’t think before they act.”

“Charlie likes to keep time with dunces. No offence, but it makes him feel smarter. He doesn’t like his boys to have too much between the ears.”

“Truth. He was surprised when I showed my hand with numbers. Took him a while to trust me with the books, years in fact.”

“The drug books are coded? They’re the only ones you do. Right?”

“Yup. No idea about the rest. Those ledgers are locked up in his office. The ones I do, he keeps elsewhere, just brings them in twice a month. Usually after the runs are done.”

Ryder slapped my thigh and beamed at me. “That’s something at least.” I watched the sea come into view through the car window again and rested my head against the glass. “Hey, Lucca’s a good guy, Shaun. Don’t be worrying about him, you’ll be all right.”

I didn’t bother answering; meeting Lucca wasn’t the only thing bringing me down. Besides, I hadn’t known the bitch was married at first. I should have stopped when I found out, when she’d shoved an envelope of cash at me the first time. But I’d liked how fucking dirty she was, and the amount of money she’d put in my pocket afterwards when she would buy an ounce of coke or whatever. That was a lot of cash to say goodbye to. Still, I should have known better but apparently, I am the master of poor choices. Stella, Lucca’s wife, had been one more to add to the ever-growing list.

In no time at all, Ryder was driving up a long road and into a driveway of an old Victorian house. A big house, one I could only ever dream about owning. These guys were minted, yet somehow, they kept their feet on the ground. Yeah, it was a big house, but it didn’t scream money. Much like Ayden’s place. A little blue Scirocco was parked off to the side, not a new car by any means, and next to it was an understated Porsche.

“Chill, man. He’s not gonna eat you for lunch.”

I laughed sardonically, served me right if he took my head clean off. “He got a gun too?”

Ryder shifted in the seat so he was turned and facing me, one arm draped over the steering wheel. “Listen, Shaun. Stella’s not in the picture anymore, this is more than her and Lucca. Don’t fucking hide from him or he will tear you down and I’ll stand right next to him while he does. The game changed last night when you came to see me, and you’re gonna figure that out soon enough.” I nodded my head at him, having no clue what on earth he was on about. “And stop fucking around with my sister. Forget you know her. I’m not stupid, I know what she’s like, all the shit she gets up to but do me a favour - forget her. Clean slate from here on out.”

Of course, he knew. I needed to stop underestimating this bloke, he’d had the upper hand the entire time, the right cards to play, was always one step ahead.

“Ugh...yeah...Chrissie and I have been done a while now.”

“Come on,” he knocked his fist to my shoulder, “don’t know about you, but I need a coffee fix.”