Chapter Twenty-Two
♥
Rowan was blowing bubbles in her car seat, and Jonathon was trying to get her to say his name. He repeated, “Jon-a-thon.”
She made a raspberry sound, and Alexandra laughed before suggesting, “Try your Gaelic name.”
“Oh no, I hate—”
Something exploded beneath the SUV. Alexandra screamed. The vehicle went off the road at a steep angle. It rolled again and again before it finally came to a stop on its roof. She felt like the vehicle was spinning, but it was just her head making her disoriented. Rowan was screaming.
An agent was shot, and she watched as brain matter splattered across the window. She started screaming, “Jonathon!”
Alexandra felt herself being shaken, but she couldn’t stop screaming.
“Wake up, sweetheart.”
She opened her eyes and saw Gabe. As soon as their eyes met, he pulled her into his embrace. “You’re okay, mo ghrá; you’re okay.”
“Jonathon?”
“He’s asleep down the hall.”
“No, you’re lying. You haven’t let me see him even though he’s been home for four days.” She started sobbing. “He’d dead. You’ve been lying to me.”
“Why would I lie? You know I went to the hospital when he was discharged.”
She shook her head. “I don’t know it!”
Conor ran in. “What happened?”
“Another bad dream,” she heard Gabe answer.
“I want to see Jonathon! I need to see him.”
Conor scooped her up and carried her to the door.
Gabe demanded, “What are you doing?”
“What you should have done after the first nightmare.”
Alexandra cried softly against Conor’s chest as he carried her down the hall. “Gabe thinks I’m ridiculous, but the dreams are so real.”
He kissed the top of her head. “I know, love.”
The mercenary standing guard outside Jonathon’s door opened it as they neared, and Conor strode into Jonathon’s room without so much as a knock.
Alexandra sighed with relief, seeing he was sitting up in the bed, playing cards with Mamó. Gabe’s grandmother stood. “Finally, a bit more enjoyable company than me has come to give me a break from the likes of you. He’s a card shark, I tell you! I haven’t won a single hand today.”
Mamó hurried from the room.
Jonathon smiled seductively and thickened his brogue in denial, “It’s not true; don’t believe a word. She’s been letting me win because she feels sorry for me.”
“Lay me beside him?” Alexandra told Conor, and he did as she asked. She met Conor’s gaze. “You can go now. Thank you for the assistance getting me here.”
Conor nodded. “Half an hour?”
“No, longer. You will know when I’m ready.”
He raised a brow but nodded and left her with Jonathon. She heard him arguing with Gabe after he closed the door on them. She shook her head and looked over Jonathon. Sighing, she stroked his face. “I’m sorry you were shot protecting me. Do you hate me?”
“God no! Why on earth would I hate you?”
“You almost died.” Alexandra started crying.
“I’d do it all again. I saved you and Rowan; that’s all that matters.” Jonathon pulled her against him and held her, whispering, “Don’t you remember? You forbade me from dying.”
She looked at him through her tears, even banged up and shot up he still wore his sensuality perfectly and unapologetically. “Do you always obey so well?”
“Aye. That I do.” He pressed his lips to hers and kissed her gently. She gazed into his brilliant blue eyes as he did.
She kissed him back just as gently. “We’re only alive because of you.”
Jonathon leaned his forehead against hers as he pressed her back against a pillow. “Gabe told me he sent Rowan and Karen back to AODH.”
Alexandra nodded sadly. “I understand why he did, but I wish he hadn’t. She was just warming to me. It’s already been more than a week. She’s going to forget me.”
“She isn’t going to forget you.”
“I hope you’re right. I miss her so much, and they wouldn’t let me see you. At least I get to skype Rowan. I’m not sue she understands that it’s me but I can see her and know she’s okay.” Alexandra stroked his cheek. “I’m so glad you’re alive.”
“I heard your screams. I wanted to come to you, but Gabe—”
“He’s kept me from your room as well. I thought you were dead, and he was protecting me from the truth. The only other explanation that made sense in my mind was you didn’t want to see me. Because you got shot and it’s my fault.”
“How can you believe it was your fault?”
Alexandra frowned. “Everyone is in danger because of me.”
“He said you were concussed and off your meds. He said he didn’t want you to get worked up.”
“That doesn’t make sense. I’ve been off my meds since Cincy, and I am fine, so why would I get worked up seeing you?” She opened his pajama shirt, revealing a clean gauze dressing that covered most of his abdomen. “How many bullet wounds?”
“Six.”
“Six times you could have been killed,” she whispered, looking devastated.
“I’m okay. I promise. I’ve been hurt tons worse than this.” The look he gave her was heated. “I’m really glad you finally escaped your bedroom and found me.”
Alexandra glanced down and blushed, admitting, “I should have broke-out sooner—I’ve missed you.”
She traced her fingertips over the spiderweb of faded scars inflicted the night his cousins tried to kill him, before caressing his undamaged skin. A tear slid over her cheek, and Jonathon brushed the tear away. “How long have you been down?”
She closed her eyes. “A week, maybe.”
“Was Gabe’s decision to keep you from me because he didn’t want you to become more depressed than you already are?”
“Perhaps.” She buttoned his shirt.
Jonathon kissed her tears away and started unbuttoning hers.
“What are you doing?”
“I’d think it was obvious, but if not, I really have lost my skills.” He kissed his way down her neck and between her breasts as the separating fabric revealed her skin.
Moaning, she closed her eyes and dropped her head back. His hand slid down her arched throat, and she shivered. “You are supposed to have complete bed rest for another five days.”
“I’m in bed. I’m resting,” he insisted as he opened the top, revealing her pale skin. He kissed her breasts before catching one of her nipples between his teeth.
Her breath caught as he bit lightly.
Jonathon covered her breasts with his hands. He squeezed and drew his fingertips toward her nipples, making her gasp at the sensation. He repeated the action again and again, squeezing slowly toward the nipple, spreading needy heat deep into her core. She whimpered when he focused on her nipples, pinching and pulling. He stretched both nipples to their limits, and she cried out. The heat low in her belly started throbbing with the rhythm he was establishing. “Tell me what you’re feeling.”
She moaned. “Need.”
“Where?”
She exhaled, rubbing her hands over her pelvis. “Here.”
He slid his hands down her body, rubbing gently over the soft swell between her pelvic bones. “I can’t wait another day for the ménage to come back together. Can I love you just a little?”
She arched her brow. “Love, not fuck?”
He slid back up her body to press a kiss to her lips. “Yes, love, not fuck. I’ve had a lot of time lying here thinking. I could have so easily lost you.”
“I could have as easily lost you.”
“Say yes; say I can press my face between your legs and give you pleasure.”
“You are riddled with gunshot wounds.”
“You’re seriously concussed.”
She bit her bottom lip. “Gabe didn’t tell you?”
“Tell me what? Is it worse than a concussion? Were you shot? Conor was carrying you. Was he being overly cautious or—”
She pressed her fingertips over his lips, sorry she’d caused him to be so distressed. “I’m pregnant.”
His mouth dropped open. He rolled off her and ran his hand over the swell again. “Wow. You’ve gained weight, but I’d have never guessed. Not far along?”
“Sixteen weeks.”
“That’s four months. Shouldn’t you be bigger?”
She nodded. “I am small.”
“I mean, I noticed, but I just thought you were finally regaining the weight Karen was harping about before Gabe sent her away, and it’s not really a very nice thing to say to a woman that you’ve noticed she’s gained a few pounds.” He pressed his ear over the swell. “Is this okay? Am I hurting you?”
“You’re not hurting me.”
He sat up suddenly. “I’m worried.”
She looked at him questioningly.
“You’re too small for sixteen weeks. What did the doctor say exactly?”
“She said they are small, at the lower end of the percentile—only about two ounces each—but they have plenty of time to catch up.”
“They?” He gasped. “Twins?”
She whispered, “Yes.”
His eyes widened with wonder. “Can you feel them? What does it feel like?”
She smiled and laughed and then started crying.
“What is it?”
“To be honest, it kind of feels like bubbles rising in a pop can.” She exhaled haltingly, trying to stop crying. “I’ve forbidden Gabe and Conor from even mentioning it, and here I am spilling my guts.”
Jonathon lay beside her. “The babies are why you’re off your meds.”
She nodded.
“Big dark cloud this week?”
She kept nodding.
“You’re afraid the babies are sick?”
She started sobbing.
“Oh God, you think the babies are going to die?” He pulled her against him, hauling her onto his lap as he sat against the headboard. Alexandra curled into him, crying harder.
Jonathon stroked her hair, rocking her silently as she cried. “You haven’t shared any of this emotion with them, have you?”
She shook her head. “I can’t. They already think the dark cloud is bad enough without seeing this. I fired Dr. Claassen because she was insisting I abort and all she had were these awful, awful horror stories about everything that can go wrong, and I know they’re completely overwhelmed, and I feel like they’re waiting for me to snap and go straight to crazy town.” She exhaled. “Holy fuck, I’m so, so sorry for dumping that on you.”
Jonathon hugged her face and kissed her so gently. “You. Are. Going. To. Be. Fine. Do you believe me?”
“I want to.”
He kissed her again, just as tenderly, still hugging her face. “Your babies are going to be fine too. Do you know how I know that?”
She shook her head, whispering, “How do you know?”
“Because I am your warrior.”
“I know you can protect me, and I’m thankful, but—”
He hushed her, pressing his fingertips to her lips as he turned and opened a nightstand drawer to withdraw his rosary. “My Nonna Maria is a special woman in her village. She is sought out for her prayers and spells. The Roma traditions of medicine and magic were passed to her by her mother, and when she had a premonition my mother would die without bearing a daughter to pass the traditions on to, her dreams pointed to one of my mother’s children who, though born male, hosted enough of the feminine in his soul to be especially powerful.”
Alexandra smiled softly and shook her head. “Let me guess—you?”
He nodded. “So I stayed with her for many years, learning the prayers and incantations, the spells. She told me that I would be called on by many falsely, but not to be deceived because the one who needed me most would be easily discerned in my mind, and so it was with you. I have been your prayer warrior since that first night at the pub.”
“When I jumped into the river, you prayed the rosary over me?”
He nodded. “Mostly rosary, but a sprinkle of Nonna’s medicine magic. You think I’m just a kook now?”
Alexandra met his mesmerizing gaze. “No, never. Thank you for sharing your truth with me. Do Gabe and Conor know about the ancient traditions your nonna passed on to you?”
“No.” He chuckled. “They put up with me even though sometimes they think I’m peculiar. They see me as both deeply superstitious and devout.”
“Devout? Because of the rosary?”
He nodded.
“And superstitious?”
“Sometimes I will ask them to do things differently.”
She smiled, curious. “Such as?”
“For example, as long as you are pregnant, I would like for you not to go outside during the three days of the full moon.”
Her forehead wrinkled. “Why?”
“The why is important, but not necessary for you to understand. Just trust me.”
“I do trust you, Jonathon.” She hugged him and pressed her ear to his chest to listen to his heart. “I feel safer now. I feel my babies are safer now.”
“Really?” he asked, sounded shocked.
“Of course, and your secret is safe with me. I won’t tell Gabe or Conor what you shared with me.”
He hugged her to him. “I’ve fallen in love with you. I tried so hard not to. That’s why I was so awful to you, wanting to run you off. I’ve been hurt, and I didn’t want you to hurt me. I felt like your soul called to mine, and that is why I became your prayer warrior. Once that vow is taken, it is never broken, so even if you had hurt me by taking yourself and Gabe and Conor from me, I still would have prayed for you as if my own soul depended on my defense of yours, because in essence that is the truth of it.”
“I don’t even know what to say to that.”
“It’s not necessary to say anything.”
He lifted her and laid her back against the pillows. “I remember asking you if I could pleasure you, before we got sidetracked by conversation.”
Her mouth opened and shut. Her mind was still spinning with thoughts—her babies, Gypsy spells, and rosary prayers. “Now?”
He smiled naughtily. “You just divulged your secrets. I gave up mine. Is there any better time than after ripping open parts of our souls to share the most emotionally vulnerable parts of ourselves?”
He kissed his way down her neck, between her breasts, over the swell of her hidden babies. He hooked his fingers into her pajama bottoms and pulled them off her hips. He pressed his nose to the juncture of her thighs and inhaled her scent before sliding the pajamas off her legs. “Open yourself to me.”
Alexandra parted her legs, and Jonathon crawled into the space. She saw him grimace, knowing he’d caused his injuries pain.
Jonathon pressed his face into her, sliding his lips and nose along her labia before closing his mouth over her clit. He sucked gently, then licked and teased over her hood before using his thumb to draw the folds upward and expose the pink bud hidden beneath.
Alexandra gasped when he licked the head of her exposed flesh. He kept licking, allowing his saliva to slide over her flesh, keeping the touch so feathery light that her need spiraled fast and high. “Oh god!”
She closed her eyes, knowing they were rolling backward with the intensity of pleasure he was giving her. Her head tossed and turned on the pillow as he licked, circling her clit.
“Jonathon, it’s too good. I’m going to come too fast.”
He shook his head, mumbling, “Nn-nn.”
The vibration of his lips broke any control she’d believed she held over the orgasm. The first wave crashed over her, making her cry out.
He didn’t stop, sliding his finger between her damp folds.
“Jesus.” She started keening as he finger-fucked her so slowly she could feel orgasm after orgasm being pulled through her. “Please, Jonathon.”
She was panting and crying when he crawled up beside her. He was still playing her body like an instrument, his fingers sliding in and out as his thumb spun magic through her clit.
He whispered, “I like bringing you pleasure.”
“Enough pleasure.”
He shook his head. “Never enough.”
She clawed at his clothing, pulling his pajama bottoms down to expose his hard shaft and tight balls.
“I can’t fuck you.”
She frowned, her hips humping against his hand despite her desperation for him to stop the pleasurable torture. “Gabe forbid it?”
“Stitches.”
She pushed him back against the pillows. “Will I hurt you if I give you a blowjob?
“You don’t want to give me a blowjob.” He proved his point, pulling another orgasm through her.
She threw her head back, whimpering as her shoulders jerked. She climbed over him, taking his length into her. She bit her bottom lip as he moved slowly inside her, his thumb still rubbing over her clit.
She felt her vagina throbbing around him and squeezed her muscles tighter.
“Alexandra,” he whispered.
“Am I hurting you?”
“Not yet.”
She could see his rib cage expanding, saw the pain written across his face.
“Liar.”
Jonathon squeezed his eyes closed. “I’m close. Please, Mistress, take me there. I can’t—”
Alexandra leaned back, lifting and lowering herself instead of rocking over him. She saw the muscles relaxing in his face. “Come for me, Jonathon. Now.”
His abdominals all tightened as she pulled the orgasm through him, making him scream. A mercenary, Gabe, and Conor came through the door.
Alexandra turned on them. “Get the fuck out!”
Conor raised his hands and took a step back. Seeing Gabe wasn’t doing the same, he jerked Gabe out the door with him. Alexandra heard an argument erupt but closed her eyes, rocking on Jonathon. “Tell me I didn’t kill you, Jonathon.”
“I’m breathing, Mistress.”
“You’re bleeding. Who is going to kill me first, Gabe or your doctor?”
“Neither,” he whispered. “They’ll never know.”
He looked at her mischievously. “Kiss me, Mistress?”
She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his. “Why do you keep calling me Mistress?”
“Superstition. If you voice your greatest desires aloud, you’ll draw the answers you seek to the wish.”
“Really? And my being your Mistress is something you wish?” She squeezed his half-hard cock with her vaginal muscles.
He moaned. “Yes, Mistress.”
“Would you want me to hurt you?” She squeezed again.
“God yes, unless that’s a deal breaker.”
She smiled with closed lips, feeling something, some excitement, some emotion she had no name for welling inside her. “It’s not a deal breaker, not for me.”
She used her Kegels to pump his length, wringing a moan from his throat. “You’ll make me come again, Mistress.”
She leaned forward, holding his gaze, not stopping. “Yeah?”
He opened his mouth, and his eyelids fluttered as he panted. “God.”
“Come on, tell me. Is what I’m doing going to make you come?”
“Yes, Mistress. Yes.”
“Not yet. Don’t do it.”
She exhaled, not understanding how she could be getting so fucking worked up over milking an orgasm from him, and kept massaging his cock.
“Please, please, Mistress, may I come?”
“Not yet. Not convinced you need it. Convince me.”
She started rocking as she squeezed him, seeing his need laid bare in his face. She smiled, feeling bad, liking the control.
“Please, Mistress, I’m begging. I really—”
She whispered, “Come, Jonathon, now.”
He exhaled with a growl, coming hard, and she rolled with it, pressing her clit into his pelvis and allowing her own orgasm to wash over her. She closed her eyes, soaking up every bit of the sweet pleasure flowing through her.
♥ ♥ ♥
Alexandra woke up draped over Jonathon. She lifted off him and rolled to his side, then wrapped around him. “Sorry, I slept.”
“I like holding you while you sleep. I rarely get the opportunity to.”
Alexandra nodded, understanding exactly what he was saying, and felt guilty because the man she wanted most to hold her in her sleep was Conor, not her fiancé, and she knew it was only because Gabe had tried so hard to keep them apart. “Do you need me to help you with your dressing?”
“Not yet. I just want to lie here and breathe for a moment.”
She sat up, worried. “I really hurt you, didn’t I?”
“No, not that.” He panted.
“Then what?”
“I am so glad you came to see me.” He rolled on his side and stroked her face as he searched her eyes. “I felt so helpless when the one got past me, and I couldn’t help you—I fired many shots but couldn’t hit him.”
“You had how many bullets in you? I’m fine. You stopped all the rest of them.”
“What happened to the last guy, Xandra?”
“I killed him. Single shot to the temple.”
“Temple? You were close, then?” Jonathon asked, pushing her bangs behind her ear.
“Yes. I was in his arms, pretending I couldn’t stand on my own.”
“Ballsy. He didn’t see it coming?” Jonathon whispered, and she answered with a nod. He asked, “You okay?”
“I’m embarrassed to say it was easy. Too easy. When I killed the man in Montana, it was hard. Really hard. Not the taking the shot part—I had to take the shot—but living with it.”
He nodded, cradling her against him when she started crying. “Someone should have told me it would get easier.”
There was a soft knock at the door.
“Enter,” Jonathon answered.
CONOR OPENED THE door and, seeing Alexandra sobbing, looked over his shoulder before coming in and closing the door. He locked it behind him and came to Jonathon’s bedside. He stroked Alexandra’s cheek, but she didn’t open her eyes. “I’m going to assume this has nothing to do with you and her. So, what’s going on?”
Jonathon shrugged and summarized. “Dark cloud. Pregnancy. Killing is easy.”
“Shit.”
Conor sat on the edge of the bed. “Xandra, honey, I’m supposed to be escorting you both to dinner. Mamó and Gabe have been cooking all afternoon.”
“Because Gabe cooks when he’s stressed,” Jonathon muttered.
“Bingo, and now she’s in no shape for dinner. Gabe was seriously pissed when I brought her to you.”
“Crying but still here. You can talk to me, not about me.” Alexandra sat up, wiped her face, and left.
Conor said to Jonathon, “Pull on a robe and head downstairs. Hopefully we will be right behind you.”
“I am not going to dinner in a robe, thank you. I’ll get dressed.”
Conor leaned on the wall outside the bathroom, waiting. Alexandra came out wearing a black sweaterdress.
He caught her hand and pulled her backward against his chest. He stroked his hand over the slightest baby bump. “Daring.”
She shrugged, but when he turned her to face him, he saw that her eyes were red. “Am I okay?”
He opened his arms, and she walked into his hug. “Perfect.”