By the time I got to the bar where all the Venom Brothers hung out, my heart was pounding in my chest like a jackhammer. My gaze darted around, checking each corner for some lurking biker with a gun or a hammer. I knew that I wasn’t welcome here, but I didn’t know what to do. If I didn’t talk to Joshua and find out what was going on, shit was going to go south. Fast.
I snuck around to the back of the bar. There was a gravel lot with a few cars up on blocks and half an old oil drum being used as a barbecue. The air smelled like cigarettes and toxic fumes and I coughed, muffling the sound in the leather sleeve of my jacket It was hotter than hell, but I didn’t dare take it off; my skin was so pale that I knew I’d glow bright white in the darkness. Easy, Jasmine, I told myself as I slipped close to the building. The back door was open and I could see the kitchen, just barely, through a crack. Some workers were laughing and chattering away in Spanish as they cooked and slung drinks. Stepping close, the scent was a heady mix of rice and grilled meat. My mouth watered as I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. When all of this is over, I’m going out for a nice steak. If I’m still alive at the end, that is.
Finally, I spotted a locked door to the right of the kitchen. It was dark, with windows overhead. Bingo. This must be what I need: a storeroom! I walked closer and pulled a knife and a tool out of my pocket, angling for the lock. With my jaw set and my teeth grinding together, I worked hard at the metal clasp until it came apart in my hands. The metal pieces dropped to the gravel with a tiny clink and I pushed the door open.
Inside, the room was dark and smelled like grease. I tried to feel the wall for a switch but there was nothing there. Instead, I saw a bulb hanging on a naked wire from the ceiling. I frowned and pulled my cell phone out, putting the flashlight on and sweeping it around the room. The only things on the ground were a hammer and an old wooden crate. Even though it didn’t look particularly sinister to me, a chill passed down my spine. I realized that I was completely in over my head. I had no idea about how Venom Brothers behaved when I wasn’t around, and I was starting to discover that I didn’t want to find out.
My heart was racing as I crept towards the other side of the room. There was a door—bolted and locked—with a thin strip of bright yellow light underneath. I figured that on the other side was the bar, and the noises overhead were coming from the bedroom where I'd interrogated Joshua. Even though it hadn't been more than a few days ago, it already felt like half a lifetime had passed. Already since then, I'd seen my club take steps towards getting pulled apart and rising up against me. But I couldn't think about that anymore, not now. I had a fucking job to do, and I was going to get it done.
There was music playing in the bar and I waited until the volume was at an ear-splitting level before gently shoving the door open. Yellow light spilled into the grimy room, and I jumped back in a rush, my breath catching in my throat as I tried to keep from being discovered. With my stomach churning, I slowly slipped out of the room.
Once I was at the bar, I relaxed a great deal. It was packed, there was a bad band on stage and lots of drunk people swaying around and singing loudly. The room was filled with smoke, and I saw a lot of women and guys who weren’t wearing Venom Brothers jackets. For the first time in quite a while, I actually felt really lucky. This was much better than if I’d just stumbled on Joshua alone. At least now I wouldn’t have to deal with him.
The bartender, Jamie, remembered me. She pushed a drink at me and winked. “Did Joshua ever find you?” She grinned at me. “He sure was looking!”
“Oh, he found me,” I said, too quietly for Jamie to hear. Slipping a twenty-dollar bill across the counter, I flashed her the biggest grin I could muster. “Don’t tell him I’m here tonight!” I said loudly, toasting my drink in the air.
Jamie nodded. She pretended to zip her lips and then mimed throwing the key over her shoulder. “You got it,” she said with a grin. I had to grin back; I had no idea whether she was full of shit, but for once, I wanted to trust someone. I wanted to believe that not everyone in the world was out to do me harm.
I couldn’t stop thinking about Leo and his band of thuggish Russians. Sure, Roni could manipulate them with sex for now. She wouldn’t be able to once they were used to her. Aside from a few exceptions, that was how men were. They didn’t care about you if you were old news. I swallowed hard and took a long gulp of my drink. The alcohol burned my throat but it was a welcome sensation: it reminded me that I was alive and on a mission. Roni may have gotten one deal out of these guys, but her actions made me concerned for the future. What would happen if Leo decided he was sick of getting sucked off by Roni and wanted another woman? What if they tried to hurt one of us? What if, god forbid, something happened to Taylor again?
I had to look out for my girls, even if it was the last thing I did. And I didn't want to hurt our new-found deal with the arms' dealers, but that was something I was going to have to deal with. We'd find a new supplier if we had to; there was always looking for someone to sell guns to. But it would be the difficulty of moving past such a betrayal. That was what would really be hard. Not an attack, but the moving on part.
Someone grabbed my shoulder and spun me roughly around. I was confused for a matter of seconds until I saw Joshua’s face looming in the darkness. He was giving me such a sharp look that my mouth went dry, and I swallowed hard. In my chest, my heart started up again, thumping wildly.
“Hi,” I said. Joshua came closer; I could smell his musk and between my legs began to grow wet and slippery again. I remembered my earlier action of masturbating while Roni worked on the Russians, and I shivered, hard.
Joshua shook his head. He was frowning intensely and despite my fear, another hard shiver of desire coursed through my body. “Where the fuck did you go?”
I shrugged. “I had business to take care of,” I said. I had to whisper loudly. The bar was so loud that I could barely hear Joshua. His lips moved a full second before I could hear his words.
“Yeah, right,” Joshua scoffed. “That’s not the kind of business you take care of, that’s what you make your girls do.”
I stared at him, my heart caught in my throat. Was it possible that somehow Joshua had already found out about our rendezvous with Leo and the Russians? Had Patti called him about Derrick? Had Roni said something?
My head was swimming. Without taking my eyes off Joshua, I downed the rest of my drink and slammed the glass on the counter.
“I’m not talking to you about this,” I announced. Jamie walked over and passed me two full shot glasses. Even though I figured one of them was for Joshua, I took both anyway, until my head was swimming in whiskey. I closed my eyes and leaned my head against my hand. This wasn’t going the way I’d wanted it to. Not at all.
Joshua grabbed my wrist, sending my head flying. We were face-to-face, eye-to-eye, our foreheads almost touching. The tension in the room was so thick that I could have cut it with a knife, but all I could do was stare into Joshua’s mesmerizing green eyes. The last time we’d done this, we’d been nineteen years old and full of love and naïveté. Nothing would ever be like that again, so why did it feel like this?
“Come upstairs,” Joshua hissed loudly. “We need to talk.”
I swung off the stool, my head spinning from the booze. I need to work on my tolerance, I thought with an amused snort as I followed Joshua through the crowded bar. He wove such a fast path through the crowd that once or twice I thought I was going to lose him.
In the room, I sat down on the bed and spread my knees, letting my elbows rest on them. “What do you want?”
Joshua came closer and I inhaled sharply. I thought he was going to touch me but he stopped just shy of where I sat. Glaring at me, he shook his head. “You need to tell me what’s going on,” Joshua said in a low voice. “You shouldn’t even be here right now, do you know that?”
I shrugged. “I had to come see you,” I said in a rush. “There’s so much shit going on. One of my girls is flipping—” When I realized what I was doing, I clamped my lips tightly together. “I mean, one of my girls is upset,” I said, this time in a calmer voice. “She thinks you’re setting Derrick up.”
Joshua laughed drily. “Derrick is a fucking moron,” he said in a low voice. “He doesn’t know what’s good for him or good for the club. When he gets back, I’m kicking him out.”
There was an odd metallic taste in my mouth, and I wondered if it came from discussing club business with someone who was technically a rival. Joshua didn’t know anything about the Wild Witches, and for the life of me, I couldn’t figure out why I was telling him. It was like he’d slipped some kind of truth serum into my drink, and now he was playing me exactly as he wanted.
“Look,” Joshua said sharply. “We have to agree right now that shit is messy. But this doesn’t have anything to do with us,” he added. “You girls can’t just go around looking for vengeance and attacking random strangers, because they’re men,” he said. “Just because my guys broke into your party doesn’t mean they’re rapists.”
My mouth felt odd again. I racked my brain, trying to remember our previous conversation. Sure, I’d told him about Taylor’s attack. But I hadn’t said anything yet about Roni, and what she’d supposedly seen.
I shook my head. “They’re not doing anything random,” I said. “You and your guys don’t have to worry,” I added, praying that Joshua wouldn’t be able to tell that I was lying. “They’re just suspicious right now. After all, Patti’s with Derrick. She doesn’t want to hate you guys. None of us do.”
Joshua stared at me. Finally, he sat down in a wooden chair that was pushed against the door. He ran his hands through his hair and shook his head. “I don’t know what to believe anymore,” Joshua said slowly. “Everything’s going to hell right before my eyes.”
I couldn’t help but gasp a little. It was as if, and not for the first time, Joshua had read my mind completely.
Joshua smirked. “What is it? Cat got your tongue?” He winked at me and all of a sudden, I was transported back to when Joshua and I were just normal people in love. I stared at him headily for a few moments, not wanting to believe that it was really him. It was easier to think that Joshua was nothing to me, that I didn’t care about what happened to him or his goddamn club.
But deep down, I knew that wasn’t true.
“Nothing,” I scoffed. “My girls are giving me grief right now, though.” I paused, wanting so badly to tell him about Roni’s accusations. “And it’s not really something that I think is gonna get any better with time.” I stretched and Joshua followed the lines of my body, up all the way to the ceiling. “They’re all dying for a revolution, whatever the fuck that means. It’s like they all forgot that they’re part of the Wild Witches.” I snorted, rolling my head from one side to the other. “You know, when I formed an MC, it wasn’t because I thought my girls deserved anything like autonomy. There’s a clear hierarchy, you know? You don’t form a group like that just to rip it apart from the inside out—it would be like electing an anarchist as president.”
Joshua laughed. It was a deep laugh, a belly laugh, a laugh that rumbled through the room. “I know,” he said, shaking his head. “I know. That’s the same kind of shit I’ve been dealing with,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. “That’s exactly what I’ve had on my plate for the past few weeks. It’s like these guys don’t get that I’m in charge, that they have to listen to me.” He rolled his eyes. “It’s for their own goddamn good, and yet they’re bent on ripping the club apart.”
I swallowed hard. I'd never imagined Joshua and me to have the same kinds of problems, especially now, all these years later. For a moment, I wanted to tell him the truth. The whole truth: Roni's plan, Taylor's assault…and my true identity. But I zipped my lips closed without saying a thing.
“So,” Joshua said lazily. He grinned at me and my stomach fluttered. “What exactly have you been doing? Sneaking around doing recon for your club?”
I swallowed again and narrowed my eyes. “What the fuck kind of question is that?” I snapped. “You think I’m nosing around here for something for my club?”
Joshua chuckled. “Something like that,” he said. His eyes glowed intensely and I shivered, feeling overcome with lust. “What have you been doing, Jasmine?”
I glared at him. “I haven’t been doing shit,” I said. “And furthermore, even if I had been doing something, I’m a goddamn free woman. I can do whatever I want, and you can’t stop me.”
Joshua came closer and my heart thumped against the walls of my chest. “Is that so?” he asked in a low, weighted voice. “So, you’re a free woman, are you?”
I nodded, my resolve weakening by the second. When Joshua was this close, I felt like I couldn’t control my own goddamn body.
“Of course,” I snarled.
“Well then,” Joshua said. The tension crackled between us and I felt myself getting lost in his eyes with each passing second. “I don’t know what to say, Jasmine.” He stepped closer and my eyes tracked his every movement, focusing on his muscular arms and hands. “I really don’t know what to do.”
“What are you talking about?” My voice came out breathy and hot with lust.
Seconds passed where we just stared at each other. Joshua was so close that I could smell the faint whiff of tobacco and whiskey on his breath. Before I knew what was happening, he’d wrapped me in his arms, and we were kissing.
It wasn’t like before. It wasn’t anything like before. Joshua’s lips were rough and desperate, pressing against mine like I was the oxygen he needed. I moaned softly as Joshua twisted his hands into my black hair, yanking my head back and covering my neck and throat with passionate kisses. As desire rose in my body like a flame, I wrapped my arms around Joshua’s neck and pulled him closer. When Joshua slipped his tongue into my mouth, I thought I’d die of happiness and lust. Being this close to him again was rocking my world. As we kissed harder, I felt sweat break out all over my body. My heart was thumping and the place between my legs was growing damp and moist. I could feel my wetness trickling out of me, smearing all over my panties as Joshua’s kisses grew hungrier with each passing second.
"Oh God," Joshua groaned. He pulled away and looked at me. Lust and passion blazed in his eyes, making them look black with desire. He shuddered and reached out, stroking a hand down the front of my shirt. As his fingers connected with my rock-hard nipples, I moaned loudly, never breaking eye contact with Joshua. I shivered as his hands slipped under my shirt and tugged it over my head, leaving me naked from the waist up.
The air inside the bedroom was slightly cool and goose bumps broke out over my skin as Joshua tossed my shirt to the side. He swallowed hungrily at the sight of my bare breasts looming before him, and I barely had to move before his mouth was fastened on one of my nipples, licking and sucking until I was moaning in ecstasy. It felt so good; it had never felt like this. Not even before, not even when we were in love. I closed my eyes and rolled my head, crying Joshua’s name until my throat was hoarse. Between my legs was a sodden mass as Joshua’s tongue wriggled over my breasts, lavishing attention on my nipples and the soft curve of skin underneath. As his fingers dragged down my back, I shuddered and pressed my body against Joshua, desperate for more of his delicious, fiery touch.
“God, Joshua, touch me,” I moaned as I slipped my hands under Joshua’s shirt and pulled it over his head. I had to stop and gasp at his muscular chest, taking in every scar, every tattoo. He looked different than he had as a boy. Even though Joshua had always been ripped and toned, his body had a hard quality now that nineteen-year-olds just didn’t possess. I moaned as I stroked my hands down his skin. He was surprisingly soft; I’d expected him to feel strong and rough, like his looks.
“That feels good,” Joshua groaned in a strained voice as I slipped my hands under the waistband of his pants. Remembering Roni and the blowjobs she’d given to the Russians, I felt another burst of shame at how I’d fingered myself and watched. Well, maybe tonight I can have both, I thought suddenly. As I tugged Joshua’s pants down and made him step out of them, I stared at the size of his massive erection. Even through his briefs, I could tell that he was extremely well hung. I moaned as Joshua pinched and tweaked my nipples.
“Are you just gonna stare at it?” Joshua’s cocky voice sent shivers through my body. I rubbed his cock, first softly, then a little harder, through the material of his underwear. Joshua closed his eyes and threw his head back. His skin was hot and I could see blood rising to the surface, indicating how turned on he was. As I tugged his briefs down, Joshua groaned in anticipation.
Naked, he was beautiful. He was like Adonis. I shuddered as I ran my hands down Joshua’s muscular thighs that were covered in little blond hairs. He flexed his legs and I shivered at the feel of his powerful muscles moving in my hands. His cock bobbed in front of my face and impulsively, I stuck out my tongue and licked the head. Joshua groaned and looked down at me. Without breaking eye contact, I took the first couple inches of him into my mouth and sucked lightly. Joshua groaned again, as I wrapped my hand around the base and began to pump up and down, creating a vacuum with my hands. Against my touch, Joshua’s cock was soft as rose petals. I loved the salty, musky tang of him in my mouth as I maneuvered over the head of his cock, paying special attention to the sensitive area on the base. Joshua tangled his fingers in my hair and thrust in my mouth. As I continued to work the shaft, spit dripped out of my mouth and landed on my breasts. The wet touch reminded me of earlier and with a slight blush on my cheeks, I reached my free hand down between my legs. My knees were spread and my labia were parted, exposing my pussy and ass to the cool air of the room. When my fingers made contact with my clit I gasped on Joshua’s cock, choking forward and taking the whole erection into my mouth and down my throat. Joshua chuckled as he gazed down at me.
“That is so fucking hot,” Joshua mumbled. His cry was heated with desire and lust. “You’re so fucking hot.”
I could only moan in response as I rubbed my fingers frantically over my swollen, soaked clit while bobbing my head on Joshua’s cock. I shivered as pleasure raced and swirled through my body. My clit began to feel like the center of the universe, radiating hot, sensual joy through every nerve, every cell. When I could feel my orgasm building, I shoved my hips in the same rhythm of my hand and increased my strokes on Joshua's cock. Just as I was about to come, Joshua pushed me backward. The motion caught me unaware and I tumbled onto my back, legs splayed in the air.
Joshua stood over me, grinning. “Stay like that,” he said. “Stay exactly like that.” I shuddered as I watched him get down on his knees and nuzzle the inside of my thigh. Wiping my damp hand on the bed, I tangled my fingers in Joshua’s hair and gasped as he began to crawl towards me in slow, controlled movements.
"Joshua," I moaned, writhing around on my back. Underneath me, the duvet felt as soft as a cloud. "Joshua, I want you so much!"
Joshua chuckled, sending a tremor of pleasure and lust through my body. The feel of his warm breath on my bare, sensitive skin was enough to ignite a giant passion inside of me, and I rolled around, desperate to feel his touch and mouth against my pussy. When he finally slipped two fingers inside of me, I gasped. Joshua fastened his mouth on my clit and began to suck, gently at first, then more intensely. Pleasure swirled through my body, and I couldn't stop myself from lifting my hips off the bed and grinding into Joshua's face with wild abandon.
“God,” I moaned, closing my eyes and tugging on Joshua’s scalp. “That feels so good. Don’t stop, please,” I murmured. Joshua’s tongue began flicking over my clit, and I thrust my hips up in the air as the sensation rocketed through my body. As he wriggled his fingers inside of me, I groaned, anticipating how good his cock would feel when it ripped me apart. Just as I was about to come for the first time, Joshua pulled away.
The cessation of pleasure felt almost painful. My clit was thumping hard and my crotch was soaking wet. Joshua grinned at me as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
“So,” Joshua said in a low, sensual voice. “You want me, Jasmine?”
Instead of answering, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him close, until our foreheads were touching. This close, Joshua’s eyes looked a dark pit into his soul. The intimacy felt too startling and I had to close my eyes and swallow hard.
“Just fuck me,” I mumbled. “Please. I need you.”
Joshua’s cock slid into my pussy, making me gasp. As always, he was a perfect fit. It almost hurt for a moment, but when he was all the way inside, it felt delicious and perfect. I opened my eyes and ground my hips against Joshua’s pelvis, wrapping my legs around his waist so that his pubic bone would press against my clit every time he thrust inside of me. Joshua groaned and began to rock his hips. He moved slowly at first, then faster and more passionately. Our bodies ground and moved together and with every inch of his cock that slid inside of me, I felt my face get hotter and hotter with lust. Joshua was grunting and thrusting hard against me when I felt my lower belly start to cramp deliciously. He grabbed my wrists together with one hand and held them over my head, pounding into me as he never had before. The sensation was so intense that tears leaked out of my eyes and dripped down my cheeks. Joshua raised his body above mine and used his free hand to fondle my breasts, pinching and twisting my nipples between his fingers until I was crying hoarsely with pleasure. The feelings and sensations moving around my body felt so incredible that I knew I couldn’t take any more, I was going to come.
Leaning close, I bit Joshua's earlobe and shoved my tongue inside his ear. He groaned and shivered, rubbing his body against mine. The sensation of his muscles pressing against my soft skin made me sigh with happiness and his long even thrusts slowly built me up to a powerful orgasm.
“God,” I moaned into Joshua’s ear. “God, Joshua, I’m gonna come so hard for you.”
Joshua grunted in reply. He kept my hands pinned over my head but lay down on top of me until our chests were pressed together. The muscles in my thighs were aching but the burning pleasure in my clit was growing hotter by the second. Everything in my body was tingling; even my hair felt amazing. As Joshua's strong chest rubbed against my nipples, I cried out and writhed underneath of him. Sweat broke out all over Joshua's body and I rubbed his back with both hands, twisting and moaning with the insatiable lust that had somehow overtaken me and my senses.
Joshua gasped and his body tensed. As every muscle in his strong torso clenched and relaxed, I could feel his cock gushing cum inside my sopping pussy. The sensation of him coming inside me was thrilling and dangerous, and I threw my head back and let my own orgasm roll over me like a truck. The sensation felt like someone was gripping me between my legs and it got stronger and stronger until my pleasure was a white-hot speck of light in my lower belly. Then, it broke and I felt it radiate throughout my body in strong waves. My clit throbbed as the powerful sensation overtook all of my senses. Everything was Joshua: his feel, his taste, his touch.
When it was over, we lay still like that for a moment, still locked together. I could feel my pussy clamping around Joshua’s cock; when he slid out of me, it was almost painful. The bed beneath us was soaked with sweat, cum, and my juices and I rolled onto my side and glanced at the muscular man whose heart I’d broken so many years before.
“That was incredible,” I murmured. “God, I needed that.”
Joshua didn’t reply. He swallowed hard and sat up, wiping his forehead with an equally sweaty hand. He glanced at the floor and then finally turned back around, staring at me intensely. “Did you know that was going to happen?”
“No,” I said truthfully. But I hoped that it would, I added in my mind, not breaking eye contact.
Joshua nodded, almost as if somehow, he’d managed to hear me. “Me neither,” Joshua said. He let out a long sigh. “I’m going downstairs to get some water. You need anything?”
I shook my head. Now that the lust and passion had been exorcized from my body, I felt almost shy around him again. When I realized Joshua was staring at my tits, I pulled the sheet over my body.
“It’s not fair to look at me like that,” I teased. “You know we’re probably never gonna fuck again like that. You can’t stare at something you don’t own.”
Joshua raised his eyebrows. I thought he was going to laugh and make a joke but instead, he lowered himself down on the bed and crawled towards my face. “I can do anything I want,” Joshua said in a low growl. He kissed me passionately, gently exploring my mouth with his tongue. Pleasure and lust spiked in my body as I smelled my own musky pussy juice coating his lips. Eagerly, I stuck my tongue out and gently licked Joshua clean. The act itself was enough to turn me on again, and I shivered as Joshua pulled away.
“Now,” Joshua said with a charming, cocky grin. “I said I’m going downstairs. But I think I’ll get a beer instead of some water. You want one?”
“Yeah,” I mumbled. “Thanks.”
I couldn't tear my eyes away from Joshua's hard, toned body as he got dressed. He left the room in a pair of jeans and no shirt, his muscular torso rippling like a bodybuilder's. I shivered, but not because of the cold. Pulling the duvet and sheet down, I crawled into bed. A yawn suddenly hit me and I closed my eyes, turning out the light and laying in the darkness.
Maybe I can just nap for a little while. He’ll be right back. There’s no harm in a little sleep, right?