Chapter 1
Kilo
Kilo gently kissed his eighteen-month-old daughter’s forehead before setting her on the floor of the daycare’s playroom.
“Be a good girl today,” he said as he knelt in front of her and gently touched her button nose. India frowned at him and he could see tears beginning to well in her eyes. She hated the daycare drop-off just as much as he did.
“Daddy...no...” Her tiny face screwed up in distress.
“It’s okay, sweetheart,” Kilo reassured her. “Daddy has to go to work. Here, we’ve got your Moo-moo.” He quickly unzipped the small backpack he’d packed for her and fished out the stuffed cow that had become her favorite toy. “You can hold on to Moo-moo and I’ll be back before you know it, okay?”
India looked uncertainly at the stuffed toy. Her big emerald eyes, the eyes that she’d inherited from Dez, sparkled with an intelligence that still amazed Kilo every day. He knew every parent thought their child was the smartest one in the room, but in India’s case, he was certain of it.
“Moo-moo,” said India, grabbing her toy with one small fist and cradling it in her arm. “Daddy,” she declared, grabbing a handful of his shirt sleeve and tugging him towards her.
“Daddy’s got to go to work, sweetheart,” repeated Kilo, trying to still the ache in his heart. If he could have, he would have brought her with him, but a graphics design shop was no place for a toddler with a short temper. “I’ll be back before long, I swear.”
“Pinky...” India immediately released his sleeve and held up her pinky finger.
A smile touched Kilo’s lips. She’d caught on to that so much more quickly than he’d expected. “Pinky swear,” he agreed as he gently hooked his much larger pinky finger around hers. “I’ll be back before you know it.”
India eyed him for a long moment before nodding to herself and releasing his finger. She turned her head and glanced around the room. Spotting one of her usual playmates, she took off as quickly as her little legs could carry her.
Kilo smiled softly as he watched her go. Her soft curls bounced with every step she took.
As soon as he was certain she was settled in, he withdrew across the room and stashed her backpack in the little cubby with her name on it. Kilo took one last glance back at his daughter and smiled before making his way outside.
It was a bright, cheery spring day. The sun was shining and a warm, gentle breeze was blowing through the leafy trees that shaded the sidewalk. Days like today etched a smile on his face and made him glad he lived within walking distance of the daycare and the little shop that he owned.
Walking down the street gave him the opportunity to stretch his legs, clear his head, and prepare himself for a day of dealing with demanding customers. To be perfectly honest, most of his clients were pretty easygoing but there was always someone that demanded more specialized attention.
The little graphic design shop featured large windows that clearly read “Kilo’s Designs.” His chest swelled with pride every time he saw it. Well, pride and a little bit of pain.
It only took him a few minutes to go through his morning routine. Switch on the lights, check the thermostat, and flip through the messages on the answering machine.
He had a few orders already in progress and the clients would be there to pick them up later on. The large printing machines that filled the back half of the office whirred to life as he queued up some outstanding orders. Business cards, letterheads, logos, he did it all. He even had a stitching machine that could emboss designs on hoodies if clients wanted.
Owning his own little shop, taking on the clients he wanted, and being able to provide a stable future for his daughter were all perks that he’d come to enjoy. If only the price hadn’t been so high. The mix-up at the sperm bank that had caused them to lose his only remaining chance for future children had been devastating. Sure, the lawsuit money allowed him to get out of the corporate rat race and go into business for himself, but there were times when he started to wonder if it was all worth it.
The bell over the front door jingled merrily as someone entered the shop.
Time to get out of his own head and put on that signature Kilo smile. He grinned and turned away from the printing machine he’d been fiddling with. His breath immediately caught in his throat.
There, leaning against the counter that separated the back of the shop from the front, was one of the most gorgeous Omegas he’d ever set eyes on. He was slender, with long eyelashes, high cheekbones, and a smile that made Kilo’s heart skip erratically in his chest.
The beautiful Omega was flanked by another Omega who appeared to be heavily pregnant. There was a slight resemblance between the two of them that led Kilo to immediately assume they must be brothers.
“What can I do for you lovely gentlemen?” asked Kilo with the most charming smile he could muster.
“I’m Julian and this is my brother, Jasper,” began the beautiful one. “I just opened a cookie shop a few blocks away and I was told you might be able to help us with logos and stuff.”
“Julian, that’s a gorgeous name,” said Kilo, instantly laying on the compliments. He had to admit he was feeling a little rusty but he wasn’t about to let that stop him. Especially since this was the most attracted he’d been to anyone since losing Dez.
Julian’s cheeks flushed red and he glanced away. “Most people just call me Jules,” he admitted before meeting Kilo’s gaze again.
His eyes were breathtaking. Kilo felt certain he would lose himself in them if he didn’t look away. He grinned and reluctantly tore his gaze away from Jules’s brilliant eyes.
“So, um, what sort of stuff are you looking for?” asked Kilo. He reached beneath the counter and pulled out a heavy book. He flipped it open. “Do you have a logo you want to use or are you wanting to have one designed?”
“He has one,” said Jasper. He handed over a printed image of a chocolate chip cookie, ringed with the words “Julian’s Cookie Cottage.” Beneath that, the words “Just Like Grandma Used to Make” were written in a cursive script.
Kilo nodded his head as he looked it over. He’d had customers give him logos sketched on notebook paper before and that had been a nightmare. At least they’d gotten something that looked at least somewhat professional.
“‘Just like grandma used to make,’ eh?” Kilo grinned as he looked back up at Jules. “My grandma was a terrible cook. She tried to make cookies for me when I was a kid. All I remember is a kitchen filled with smoke.”
Jules chuckled. “Our grandma was pretty amazing,” he said with a smile. “All the recipes I use were hers originally. She taught me everything I know about baking.”
“I swear, it sounds like everyone’s grandma was better than mine,” Kilo said, shaking his head with a laugh. “So then, this is definitely a great starting place.” He gestured to the logo again. “Are you wanting business cards? Window graphics?”
“Definitely business cards,” agreed Jules. “I hadn’t actually thought about window graphics before. I hired someone to make a shop sign for me and that’s what’s hanging in the window now.”
“Okay, good,” said Kilo, nodding to himself as he flipped through the book in front of him, trying to locate the business card section. He’d put together a standard design package that customers could pick from instead of trying to have them describe what they wanted every single time.
“Oh, wait...what was that?” asked Jules, reaching out and placing a hand on the edge of the book, just inches from Kilo’s fingers.
Kilo felt as if his entire body had been yanked to a halt. His mouth felt suddenly dry and he had to force himself to keep from meeting Jules’s eyes. He found himself immediately grateful for the counter between them, blocking the involuntary arousal that had begun to grow uncomfortably tight in his jeans.
“I...um,” Kilo audibly cleared his throat. “What was what?” He flipped back a few pages.
“There, those,” said Jules, his expression lighting up as the page was revealed. The book had been opened to a series of car wraps featuring a variety of different graphical styles. “This is what I was talking about, Jasper.” Jules glanced back at his brother with a grin. “These would be perfect.”
“I can certainly do a vehicle wrap for you if you want,” said Kilo, trying to get back into business mode and ignoring the hammering in his chest. He hadn’t expected this beautiful specimen to cause such a strong reaction in him. It wasn’t like he’d been looking for a new relationship or anything. “The process is a bit involved, but they’re a great way to advertise your business.”
“I don’t know,” said Jasper, shaking his head slowly. “I mean, your budget for graphics is already pretty tight. You talked about getting logos, maybe a couple t-shirts, but this kind of blows the rest of that out of the water.” He inclined his head forward and examined the estimated prices under some of the designs.
“Prices vary depending on the size of the vehicle and the complexity of the design,” Kilo quickly explained. “As long as you don’t want me to wrap a school bus or something then I may be able to come down on the price a little too.”
“Oh, yeah, no it’s not that bad,” laughed Jules.
“It is a minivan though,” countered Jasper. “That’s definitely bigger than your average car.”
“I wouldn’t have pegged you for a minivan guy.” Kilo tilted his head a little uncertainly. A fairly young, highly attractive Omega driving a minivan? The only explanation was that he had kids to haul around. Had he misread the situation?
“I get that a lot,” said Jules, smiling and waving a hand dismissively. “I like the way it handles. Plus it gives me plenty of room to haul around stuff for the shop. I can fit deliveries, supplies, and pick up my nieces and nephew from school if I have to. When you’ve got a big family like ours, you find ways to help out.”
“Nieces and nephew?” Kilo asked before he could stop himself. “So you don’t have any little ones yourself?” He chanced a look back up at Jules.
“No,” Jules replied, shaking his head slowly. The blush on his cheeks seemed to have deepened. “I guess I just haven’t met the right guy yet.”
Their eyes met again and Kilo felt his heartbeat slow. His skin felt flushed and he could only imagine just how red his cheeks must’ve been. Every fiber in his being wanted to ask Jules out right then and there. He desperately wanted to know more about him. To spend more time in his presence, staring into those beautiful eyes.
But there was something stopping him. An invisible anchor he carried with him wherever he went.
“Well then, a minivan isn’t too difficult to work with,” began Kilo, forcing his gaze back down to the book of designs. “Tell you guys what, if you want to order the vehicle wrap we can do that and then I’ll throw in a hundred business cards and two t-shirts for free. Call it a gift. All you have to do is promise me that you’ll come to my shop for all your graphics needs in the future. What do you say?”
A broad grin spread across Jules’s face. “It’s a deal.”
The rest of the afternoon passed in a flurry. Kilo had a steady stream of customers coming in to pick up orders and make new ones. It all seemed to pass him by in a haze. His thoughts were preoccupied with the image of Jules’s face and his gorgeous smile. No matter what he tried, he couldn’t shake it.
It wasn’t until it was time to close up shop that he felt as if his heartbeat had returned to normal. Even then, he still felt as if he was walking on clouds. It was early evening as he locked up the front door and started down the street back towards the daycare.
India was overjoyed to see him, as usual. She practically leaped into his arms as soon as he entered the playroom. As he scooped his daughter up in his arms, he couldn’t help but think about how nice it would be to have an Omega willing to look after her during the day so she wouldn’t have to deal with a painful separation every day. The image of Jules’s face popped into his mind again and he silently chastised himself for wanting to saddle that gorgeous little Omega with the responsibilities of a child that wasn’t his. Especially when it was clear that Jules was pretty serious about his business.
When they finally got back home, Kilo fed India a light dinner. She wasn’t particularly interested in eating the veggies he tried to tempt her with and promptly threw them on the floor. It was all part of the routine they’d fallen into. Eventually he’d get her to eat a few carrots and a couple of peas, but until then, everything went on the floor. For now, he just tried to content himself with the fact that she was eating something.
At her last wellness checkup, the doctor had been pleased with her growth and said not to worry too much about how picky she was being.
As soon as she’d finished her dinner, Kilo gave her a bath. This, at least, was something she enjoyed: Being surrounded by piles of bubbles, playing with her bath toys, and singing made-up little songs that were mostly just wordless vocalizations.
Once she was clean, and dressed in her pajamas, Kilo tucked her into her little bed and read her a story. She was fast asleep within minutes. He kissed her forehead and slipped out of the room on silent feet.
Being a single parent was never something that he’d imagined for himself. He’d always known he’d wanted to be a dad, and India had fulfilled a longing deep inside him. While it wasn’t his favorite thing in the world, there was still part of him that was happy to be cleaning mashed up peas off the kitchen floor after dinner every night.
As he dropped onto the sofa and switched on the TV, his thoughts were immediately interrupted by the images flashing across the screen. He barely registered what the show was even about, all he knew was that it had been one of Dez’s favorites. The Omega had watched it religiously, every single night that they had been together. Kilo had always hated it.
He switched the TV off, but it was too late. The dam had been broken and the flood of frustration and guilt rampaged through him yet again.
Dez was gone. Kilo’s Omega, his little girl’s father, had died in childbirth.
Dez hadn’t even wanted kids. He’d been nearly ten years younger than Kilo and in the thick of his career. He’d wanted to focus on following his own dreams instead of settling down and building up a family. For a while, Kilo had tried to content himself with that and that alone.
Then the cancer had come. Kilo could still remember his diagnosis like it was yesterday. Sitting in the doctor’s office and feeling like he’d been punched in the stomach. He’d barely been able to focus on Dez’s words of encouragement on the ride home. All Kilo could remember was the warning that the radiation treatment might render him infertile.
He’d used that as leverage. Pressured Dez into getting pregnant because he knew they might not have the chance later. There was also always the chance that he might not live long enough to complete the treatments. Cancer was unpredictable at the best of times and he didn’t want to leave anything to chance. He wanted to have a child before he died, and he wanted it to be with Dez.
Kilo ground his teeth at the thought of how selfish he had been. He loved India more than anything else in the world, but the guilt that gnawed at him was almost unbearable at times. If he hadn’t pressured Dez into getting pregnant to satisfy his desire to be a parent, then maybe...maybe the Omega would still be around today.
He looked down at his hands and sighed. Their relationship had been rocky even before the cancer. He doubted they would’ve been together very much longer even if things hadn’t gone the way they had. He’d done his best to put all of that behind him, but it seemed to come up every time he even contemplated getting back into the dating scene.
Relationships were more effort than they were worth, and they always ended in heartbreak. That sobering realization solidified in his thoughts.
Yet as he sat there staring through the darkness at the blank TV screen, he couldn’t help but picture Jules’s beautiful smile once more. Perhaps, maybe, not all relationships had to end in tragedy.