CHAPTER NINE
Loch
I watched as Reagan scurried into the house. She was running. From me. From whatever was going on in her head. From something in her past.
I wiped my damp hands on my jeans then pulled out my phone. I sent Bocca a message, knowing if there was anything to be found that he would be the one to dig it up.
Me: Need to know everything you can find on Reagan Turner.
Bocca: Give me two hours.
I shoved the phone back in my pocket and continued my work. The grass didn’t really need to be cut; it could have waited another few days. I knew it was a stupid reason to try and see her. I had been gone all weekend, unable to get her out of my head. I had been back a day and I avoided the bar like a grumpy old man.
I woke up that morning, like an addict, needing to see her. I knew she had the night off from the bar. I had a feeling she would lock herself away inside if she didn’t have anywhere she needed to be. It was stupid and childish of me. But it worked. I almost smiled when I saw her walking towards me. My eyes squinted, wondering if I was slipping into some kind of daydream. A heat-induced mirage. But it wasn’t, and she was right in front of me, chest heaving and sweet smelling. It took everything in me to fight the urge to pull her into me and claim her mouth with mine. I wasn’t sure how much longer I would be able to resist.
I’d noticed the exhaustion and stress before, but right then in the bright daylight, it looked worse. Her cheeks were starting to lose their fullness and I could see hollow now. I wondered if something happened while I was gone. I knew she wouldn’t tell me. She kept herself locked up tight and it was frustrating as fuck.
I finished Ethel’s yard, then mowed my own. I took a shower and decided I needed to shave. I’d let it go over the weekend, and while I didn’t mind a little scruff, I wasn’t trying to have a beard. It was too hot for that shit. After I was finished and dressed, I hopped on my bike and rode over to the clubhouse.
I found Bocca in his room, still deep into whatever was on his computer screen. I knocked on the door frame and he shifted his gaze to me. With a chin lift from him, I entered. He pointed to a stack of printed out papers on the edge of his desk. The stressed and grim look on his face was enough to make me feel uneasy. Without words, I knew there was something major I was missing. I picked up the pages and flipped through them. He laced his fingers together behind his head and leaned back in his chair.
“First of all, she moved around a lot,” he started after he blew out a long, heavy breath. “She’s worked at whatever she could get. A few bars. Mostly restaurants and motels. A place called Fluffy’s Gentlemen’s Club in Dallas.”
The thoughts of her stripping made a deep growl escape me. I hoped that it wasn’t the case.
“Yeah, I know,” he said, agreeing with my wordless discomposure. “Couldn’t find out what she did there. The place looks a little upscale, though. Checked out their website, there’s a hot, little Asian I wouldn’t mind seeing. Anyway, Reagan worked at a diner on the outskirts of Seattle for a while then a law firm around the same area. Looks like she was a receptionist or something. That’s where she’s been the last couple of years.”
“So, why would she leave?” I asked, scratching the back of my neck. There had to be more by the look on Bocca’s face. My gut tightened as I waited for the fucking ball to drop.
“From what I can tell, she lived with another girl that worked there. Reagan doesn’t have any social media accounts. She only has an email that she used for job purposes and to keep up with Ethel every few months. But her roommate has a Facebook and a love of posting every-fucking-thing. Found a bunch of pictures of them together on it. Then about six months ago the pictures and posts of the two of them faded away. Replaced by pictures of this guy the roommate was dating.” He pulled out one of the papers and showed me a picture.
The girl in the picture had long black hair and I would have put her around Reagan’s age. The guy standing next to her had his arm around her shoulders. His face smashed against hers. He looked like he came from money. Or was at least trying to give off the appearance that he did. Something about the look in his eyes made me raise a brow. He was smiling, but there was no light there.
“You see it too, huh? I’m trying to find out anything I can on this guy.” Bocca shuffled the papers around and handed me another one. “So, Reagan’s roommate, Liz as she liked to be called, was pretty active on social media, but then it all ceased one day. Nothing. Not even a check-in. Hasn’t been anything in a while. Around the time your girl showed up.” He pointed to the paper. It didn’t slip by me how he called Reagan my girl. It also wasn’t lost on me how it made me feel inside. But it wasn’t the time to think about that.
I scanned the sheet Bocca pointed at. It was an article on Elizabeth and Reagan. The police were looking for both of them, calling them missing. I flipped through the next few pages, only about four articles from different news sources in all. It didn’t seem like much to me. The last one I read stated that there was no indication of foul play in their apartment. So the police were leaning towards the idea that the girls had taken off on their own. But the parents of Elizabeth were pleading with people who might know anything. Insisting that their daughter wouldn’t have just taken off like that.
“Any idea on where the roommate is?” I asked, my mind going a million different directions. I had more pieces of the puzzle but it wasn’t enough to show me the picture.
“No. And before you ask, they questioned the boyfriend. According to the police report, he stated that he hasn’t seen her and has no idea where she might be. He told them that the last time he saw her was three nights before she stopped showing up to work.”
“Bullshit,” I mumbled as I sat down on the edge of his bed. Something was off and I’d put my money on the boyfriend. There was something about him that sat like a heavy boulder in my gut.
“Is she in trouble?” Bocca asked, raising a concerned brow. I knew the two of them were friendly, so I could sense the concern was genuine.
“Yeah, I think so. But she won’t say a damn thing to me. When I first saw her she had bruises all over her face and neck. They were fadin’ so I’d say they were a few day’s old at the time. A week at most.” I sighed, thinking back. I knew the more information I could give him, the more it would help in his search. “She said she got jumped at a rest stop, but I could tell it was a lie.”
“I’ll keep looking. Let you know if I find anything.” I nodded thanks to him before heading out of his room.
I found Brandon half asleep on one of the couches in the lounge area. Most of the lights were off and the TV volume was down low. One foot was propped up on the coffee table and his ball hat down low over his eyes. I sat down beside him and he jerked alert.
“Thanks for this weekend.” I didn’t have to thank him. It was the type of shit he had to put up with being a prospect. He wanted in, he had to do the crap work. He never complained though. I had no doubt that patching him in was going to be on the list at the next meeting, but I wouldn’t tell him that.
“No prob, VP.” He pulled his hat off and ran his hand through his hair, attempting to fix it. Then he rubbed his eyes. I wondered if he’d gotten any sleep while I was gone.
“You look like shit,” I said, giving him a little sympathy in my tone. He nodded once. “Need you to do something for me, when you’re done hit the fuckin’ sack, man. Won’t need you ‘til tomorrow.” He sat up straight, letting me know he was paying attention to me.
“Yep.”
“Need you to take Reagan’s car to Carl’s,” I said.
Carl’s was in the next town over. It was a tiny car lot that we got most of our vehicles from. He had a small inventory, but if there was something specific we needed he would find it.
“Get her somethin’… better. Not new. She is goin’ to be pissed enough as it is. Figure I should lessen the blow,” I said scratching the back of my neck. He nodded and sent me a knowing smirk. That girl had fire in her. I could respect that, even if it plain ticked me off most of the time.
“I’m on it.” He jumped up like he was ready to take off.
“Make sure it’s small, four doors. Not too old. Nice.” She hated my truck and I knew she would flat out hate and refuse something big. No trucks, no SUVs. “I’m gonna take her out and distract her. Otherwise, she’ll be in that house all day. Get the keys from Ethel, I’ll fill her in.” He nodded and I stood.
“I’m gonna shower then head that way. Should give you enough time to convince her to go with you,” he said grinning. “Maybe…”
“That woman…” I shook my head and did my best to hide my chuckle. I was a little amused with the thoughts of how hard she was going to fight me on it.
I didn’t have much at home in the way of food, so I rode over to the small deli in the middle of town. I ordered two chicken salad sandwiches, fresh fruit bowls, and chips. Then I took off for Reagan.
I knocked on the door and was a little relieved when Ethel answered. I needed a moment alone with her to tell her my plan. She smiled and patted me on the hand after I explained everything.
“I’ve known you all these years, Nathan, and I never thought I’d see the day…” She left it unsaid, but I knew what she was getting at. I shook my head, trying to ignore the twinge in my gut that agreed with her.
“She’s your granddaughter. I’m just lookin’ out for her, same as I do for you.” I tried to sound convincing, but she was too wise. I saw the little gleam in her eyes as she looked up at me and nodded. Reagan had gotten under my skin and Ethel could see it.
“Her life hasn’t been easy, Nathan,” she said. A sadness appeared on her weathered face. “I know yours hasn’t been either. But you are both strong. Too strong. The two of you are downright damn stubborn. Try not to let it get to you… or the better of you.” With that, she called up the stairs to Reagan, then shuffled off to the kitchen.
I stood waiting in the front doorway. Reagan rounded the corner and froze when she saw me. She had changed since this morning. She was wearing cutoff jeans and a loose tee. Her hair was pulled into a low ponytail and it wrapped around her shoulder. I wanted nothing more than to run my fingers through the silky strands.
“What are you doing here?” She sounded breathy, caught off guard by seeing me standing there.
“Let’s go. We’re goin’ for a ride.” I looked down and saw her feet were bare. I cursed at myself for not thinking that far ahead.
“Just let me go get my keys and phone.” She turned back to the stairs.
“You don’t need it.” I looked down beside the door and let out a relieved breath. Her boots were sitting right inside the front entryway. I picked them up handed them to her.
“Mr. Bossy, jeez.” She bent down and put them on. When she stood back up she cocked her hip and put her hand on it. I looked at her with a blank expression on my face, trying my best to hide my amusement. “You could say please, Reagan, I would love your company for a little while.”
“Reagan,” I started in a stern tone. But it was all I could do to keep my lips from twitching into a smile. That girl had balls. “Get on the damn bike.” I barked. She jumped with a start and I swear there was smoke coming from her ears. “Please,” I said through gritted teeth.
“That wasn’t so hard now was it?” She smiled, patted my shoulder, then bounced out the door and down the stairs. I looked over to see Ethel laughing and shaking her head at the whole thing.
I fastened the helmet on her head then straddled my bike. She climbed on behind me with ease. I felt her take a deep inhale before wrapping her arms around my middle. Like the last time, she was trying to keep distance between us. And just like last time, I wrapped my hands around the upper thighs and yanked her flush with me. She made a noise in the back of her throat. I took off before she could say anything.
I was surprised she didn’t ask where we were going. I half expected to get the third degree before she even walked out of the house. The fact that she didn’t, made me think that there was a part of her that wanted to be around me. Even if it was a small part, I’d take it. I couldn’t help but smile as I drove through the winding roads out of town. We weren’t going far. There was a spot I always went to when I needed time to reflect and be in my head. I had never shared that place with anyone. Not even any of the brothers.
I pulled off onto a dirt road, leaving a huge cloud of dust behind us. She held on tighter as we bounced along. The road ran through a thick forest of trees. On the other side of the tree line was an old farm, long abandoned. I pulled off a bit when the trees started to thin. She hopped off and I followed. She gave me a questioning look as I reached into my saddlebag and pulled out the food and a blanket. I didn’t say a word and was shocked when she followed without asking a million questions.
We zig-zagged through the trees then hopped the old wooden fence lining the property. In the overgrown field, there was one, lone, huge willow tree. We made our way over to it, stomping down the tall, dry grass. Spreading the blanket out near the trunk of the tree, I watched her. The subtle wind blew the loose strands of hair around her face. We studied each other intently. Both of us wanted to say something, but neither of us dared to break the moment. She plopped down on one corner and I sat a few feet away from her on the other. I pulled out a sandwich and handed it to her. She stared down at it with a sick expression on her face.
“You need to eat, Rea.” My voice was calm but demanding. She huffed before picking it up and taking a bite.
“Happy?” She scowled at me. I laughed. I found when I let my guard down a little, it was easy to laugh around her.
We ate in silence. She surprised me by eating everything I’d gotten her and even half of my fruit. Which I was happy to give up. A calm washed over her as she popped blueberries in her mouth one at a time. I wondered if it was the fruit or someplace she was at in her mind. After she finished, she scooted a little closer to me and leaned back on her hands. Her leg brushed up against my knee as she crossed her ankles. I leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees.
“Why here?” she asked after a moment of staring up through the swaying branches. I took in a deep breath, preparing myself to talk about things I hadn’t in a long time. Past memories of happier times.
“My dad used to come out here and help Mr. Martin around the farm. Mostly durin’ the summer, when it was too hot for the old man to get out much. He refused to hire help. Said that his parents did it until he was old enough to take it over for them. He never married and never had children, so eventually the place just…” I scanned the area with my hand out.
“When I was old enough,” I continued, “I would come out here with my dad and help. Long summer days spent in these fields. Mom would always come up mid-day and make us take a break. She would bring us sandwiches and we would all sit under this tree and eat.” I smiled at the memory.
“You were close with your parents?” Her tone was soft. A side I wanted to see more of. I nodded to answer her question.
“When I was seventeen they were killed in a car accident.” My tone flat, as if I was simply stating a fact. Her face changed and I saw sadness for me in her eyes. “It was a long time ago,” I said in an attempt to brush it off. The truth was that when I thought about that day it still stung. I stilled ached for the younger me that had to go through it.
My dad would take my mom to the city once a month. It was their date night. He always tried to make it different. They’d go see movies, eat at new restaurants, or go see a play. Every year he made sure to take her to see The Nutcracker. She looked forward to that night the most.
I remembered he said he was taking her to some fancy restaurant. Mom had been dropping hints all week about wanting a good steak, and he knew the exact place he was going to take her. They’d gone there many times over the years. Pretty sure by then they’d each sampled everything on the menu twice over. But she loved it. I knew what she was going to order even before they were on their way. Steak done medium, sour cream and dill mashed potatoes, and sautéed fresh spinach. It was her favorite and she spoke of it often. Dad would order some moderately priced red wine and let her drink most of it, knowing that he would be driving.
It was the last half of my senior year. I was at the top of my class. All around American boy. I didn’t play sports but I went to most of the games; had school and town pride. I was going off to college in the fall. Although, I wasn’t sure what for at the time. My parents had high hopes for me. They wanted me to spread my wings and get out of the small town.
I was stressed out working on my senior project. I still hadn’t nailed down an idea. Thinking back, I couldn’t even recall what it was about. I rushed into the house as my parents were getting ready to leave. I gave each of them a quick hug and kiss before dashing off to my room. If I had known it would have been the last time I saw them, I wouldn’t have brushed off my goodbye so hastily. I wouldn’t have taken those everyday hugs and cheek kisses from my mom for granted. But that’s the thing about life, you never know how it’s going to go.
“Still doesn’t mean it hurts any less.” Her voice was a whisper that floated to me in the breeze and pulled me out of my thoughts.
“Come here,” I demanded, softly. She didn’t move. I didn’t really expect her to. I leaned forward and pulled her into me. I laid back and tucked her into my side. After a moment I felt her relax against me, her head lying over my heart. “Now, sleep.”
She let out a deep sigh. My thumb rubbed absentminded circles on her hip. To my surprise, she nodded off not long after. I lay there for a long time looking up through the branches. There was a peace in watching the way they swayed back and forth in the light breeze.
I must have dozed off myself. A vibrating in my pants pocket jolted me awake. I shifted my head to look at Reagan. She was still sound asleep on me. I smiled and carefully dug my phone out of my pocket. I glanced at the clock before I read the text message. We had been out here for nearly three hours, two of that probably sleeping. I was glad. She needed it.
Brandon: It’s done.
Shoving my phone back in my pocket, I decided to feel her against me for a few more moments. I knew I wouldn’t have another moment like this. I was no good for her. She was too young to be tied down by an old man like me. Finally giving in that we needed to get going, I gave her a genital shake.
“Rea,” I said in a low tone. “Reagan, time to get up, babe.”
She stirred beside me, pulling herself from her groggy state. A low, sad moan escaped her before she let out a long sigh. She sat up and rubbed her eyes. Maybe it was the sleep, or the sun and fresh air, but she looked a little better. And as much as I wanted to do more, I knew I had to keep her at arm’s length.
“Well, that was nice. Thanks,” she said then gave me a coy smile.
“Yep.” I stood up and reached for her hand. She took it then helped me pack up everything. I led her through the woods and back to my bike. Her hand in mine as we weaved in and out of the trees.
The ride home was calming and silent. But to me, there was an edge to it, like the calm before the storm. She relaxed into me, arms low around my waist, body moving in sync with mine. And for just a few moments, I let myself enjoy the feeling of her against me.