Past
Cass: Age 7
Paxton: Age 9
Dad finally replaced the wheels on my skateboard, so Matt and I are cruising around the neighborhood. Mom even said I could start riding my board to school now that I’m in the sixth grade.
“Hey Pax! Watch me jump this curb,” Matt shouts as his board gains a little air on the small cement obstruction.
“Dude, that’s easy. We need to find something to build a ramp with.” I pick up my board and walk into the garage, looking for any materials sturdy enough to use to make a small ramp, one my mom will approve of—she’s a worrier, or at least that’s what my dad says.
Matt follows me into the garage just about the time Laney and Cass come running out of the house.
“Mom said you have to play with us!” Laney announces. When I look at Cass beside her, she’s staring me in that weird way she does.
“Whatever! We’re making a ramp, and you’re a girl. You’ll get hurt and then cry and I’ll be blamed for it, so no way!” I shout as Matt stands beside me, nodding his head in agreement.
Laney stomps her feet and lets out a frustrated groan.
Cass smiles brighter. “I can do it. I won’t get hurt. I’m good at skateboarding!”
Matt and I burst out laughing, doubling over at the waist. I catch a glimpse of Cass’s face—there’s a frown there now, and she looks like she might cry. Now I feel a little bit bad, but only for a second. I do hate hurting her feelings though.
Laney pushes her shoulders back and steps in front of me. “Be nice, Pax! We can do anything boys can. We’ll prove it to you!”
My eyes narrow at my little sister. “Wanna bet?”
Laney narrows her eyes back at me. She may be two years younger and a couple of inches shorter, but she is tougher than most girls I know. We’re standing toe to toe now and she snarls, “Absolutely!” She sticks her hand out toward me so we can shake on it. Matt and Cass stand to our sides, glaring at one another in support of their teams. “What do Cass and I get when we win?”
“I’ll let you play with Matt and me for a month, no questions asked.” Matt sighs next to me so I jab him with my elbow. He winces but keeps his mouth shut. “If we win then I get to have all of your bacon at breakfast for the next month.”
Laney and Cass look at one another with huge grins on their faces then Laney turns and sticks out her hand. “Deal! Let’s shake on it.”
I take her hand and seal our agreement.
For the next thirty minutes, we build our makeshift ramp. It’s not bad for two eleven-year-old boys and a couple of little girls. Since I’m the heaviest, I test it out to make sure it can support our weight.
“Okay, let’s go. Matt and I go first then you two,” I inform Laney and Cass. They nod their heads in agreement and sit on the curb to watch.
Matt goes first and makes a pretty impressive jump, throwing his hands in the air in triumph for effect. Laney glares at him while Cass claps. Now her eyes flash to mine, and again, I feel weird because of what I see in them when she looks at me. It’s strange. Her face gets all shiny, and her eyes are full. The worst part is I think she looks kind of pretty when she does it, but…gross. For one, it’s Cass, and two, I want nothing to do with girls.
When I come up on the ramp, I reach down and grab my board, lifting it into the air with me. Matt yells, Cass claps, and Laney just grimaces. I land smoothly and skate directly back to where the girls are sitting.
“Okay, who’s first?” I ask, giving Laney a sharp look.
Despite my hinting, she doesn’t stand up first, Cass does. Beaming at me as usual, she reaches for my board, practically singing her response to my question. “I am.”
Reluctantly, I hand her the board. “Are you sure, Cass?”
She pats me on the shoulder like she’s petting her cat and nods her head. “Yep, I’m positive. Don’t worry Pax, I won’t get hurt.”
Putting my hands on my hips, I stare her down. I hate when she and Laney talk to me in that motherly way. “Well, if you do, don’t you dare let me see you cry! Crying is for wimps!” She flinches a little when I say it and once again, the hurt I see makes me feel kind of bad.
Laney stands up and pushes my shoulder. “Shut your pie hole, Pax! Cass is brave and tough!” I just roll my eyes.
Cass walks at least five yards away from the ramp for a head start, and I can see her lips moving as she counts to herself. There’s only a moment of hesitation before she’s skating toward the ramp, gaining speed as she goes. Cass hits the ramp at full speed, her eyes wide as she bends to catch the edge of her board, and it’s perfect. I watch in awe.
Then it happens—she lands just a little bit off balance and the board goes flying out from under her. She screams. Laney screams. I’m running toward her before she ever hits the ground. I make it to her within seconds of her landing sideways, hand out to break her fall.
So stupid. I should’ve never made this bet with them.
When I bend beside her, I can see her wrist is definitely broken. I say her name, but she isn’t making a sound. “Cass?” I say again. Matt and Laney are standing beside us now, but I don’t even pay attention to them. I wait for Cass to say or do something. Her head turns in my direction, and when her eyes meet mine, I’m amazed to find her not crying. She’s only biting her bottom lip and water is shining in her eyes, but no tears fall. Not a single one.
“Laney, go get Mrs. Porter,” I order without looking away from Cass. Laney runs off in the direction of the house. Cass is cradling her arm against her chest. “Cass, put your arm around my neck,” I suggest gently. She does as I said, and a tiny whimper escapes her when she first moves. I slide my arms under her long, gangly legs and scoop her up.
Luckily, she isn’t very heavy, so I carry her toward her house just as Mrs. Porter comes running out with worry on her face and Laney not too far behind her. Matt is scrambling at my side.
“Oh my gosh! Cassandra!” Mrs. Porter screams as she draws nearer. “Paxton, put her in the car.”
Matt opens the back door so I can place her in the back seat and Laney jumps in on the other side while Mrs. Porter runs into the house to grab her keys. I’ve never seen her move so fast.
When looking back down at Cass’s face, I see it’s white as a sheet, which makes my stomach turn because normally she’s the shade of caramel candy. Her eyes are wide and bloodshot, but still no tears. As I set her down, she shakes her head and holds on to my neck. She won’t let go, and after a second I realize she wants me to go too. I climb in without putting her down, and it feels strange being worried about her.
It doesn’t feel like the same kind of worry I felt when Laney had the chicken pox, and I heard mom say her fever was dangerously high. This concern seems different.
As we pull out of the driveway, all of us piled into the Porters’ car, Cass speaks for the first time.
“Pax,” Cass says weakly, and I look down at her.
“Yeah?” My throat feels a little tight because I can see the pain in her eyes.
“I didn’t cry,” she whispers, and then she closes her eyes.
A small smile stretches across my face, and I just look out the window, holding Cass, protecting her.