Clover

Ever have a weird feeling that everything in life is about to change, but you don’t know why? I have that feeling.

It’s Thursday afternoon, and I just left Dr. McGillicutty’s office after a very productive session. I feel like I’m finally beginning to believe some of the stuff he’s been drilling into my thick skull for weeks now, and it’s like a weight was lifted off my shoulders.

On my way home, I stop at the grocery store to pick up chicken for dinner tonight. Heather and I are grilling outside with the kids since Uncle Carson is still out of town. My phone rings when I’m walking out of the store. I juggle my bags struggling to answer the call when I see that it’s Heather. Crap, maybe she thought of something else she needs from the store. For a second, I consider not answering and saying I was already on my way in the car, but I put that idea out of my mind. She’s been nothing be helpful and encouraging throughout my recovery, and if she needs salt or bread, I’ll go back in and get it for her.

I stop next to Uncle Carson’s Audi SUV and answer while I load my bags. “Hey, what’s up? I’m just leaving the store. Did you need me to run in after something else?”

“Um, no. Are you on your way home?” She sounds off like something’s wrong, and instantly, I’m thinking about the feeling I had when I woke up this morning that things were about to change. God, please don’t let something be wrong with the kids or Uncle Carson. I think I’ve suffered enough for a lifetime.

“Yeah, what’s wrong?” I ask a little panicked, bracing for the worst.

“Nothing’s wrong… per se…”

“Per se? What does that mean? Come on, Aunt Heather, don’t mess with me like this. Tell me what’s going on.”

“You have visitors, dear.”

I freeze with the keys in my hand ready to unlock the car. “Visitors? Who?”

She clears her throat and lowers her voice. “Gage and Adley are sitting in the living room. They just arrived from Colorado.”

I drop the keys and lean my hip against the door. “In the… living room? Colorado?” I bumble.

“Yes. I told them you weren’t home. They, er, he, insisted on waiting for you.”

“Is everything all right?”

“Seems to be, but…”

“But what?” I push off the door and squat to retrieve my keys and get out of the hot sun.

“Well, Gage… he, he looks different. Honest to God, Clover, I didn’t recognize him at first.”

Inside the car, I press the start button and crank the air conditioning. Suddenly, I feel a little nauseated and a touch faint. I shouldn’t drive like this, but Heather sounds like she’s coming unglued, and I need to get home.

“Different how?”

“Oh, hang on. Adley is asking for a drink of water. Hurry home, please.” She hangs up just as the Bluetooth is transferring over to the car. Shit, I wanted to know why Gage looks so different that she didn’t recognize him.

Why are they here? What could possibly be so important that they got on an airplane and flew across the country in plain sight? They got through the kidnapping and murder coverage hardly being noticed, and they have stayed off the radar for weeks. Now he’s flying around where anyone can see him?

The radio is on a popular pop station that Carson likes to listen to. It’s not turned up, but I recognize the song, it’s Massive Love, Apollo Mercury’s biggest hit. I use the button on the steering wheel to turn it up and listen to the end. What a weird coincidence that he’s here sitting in my living room at home, and his song is playing on the radio.

The DJ starts talking, and usually, I tune them out, but he’s talking about Apollo Mercury and a recent sighting at LAX where he was holding hands with… a child. Oh my God. If someone saw him there, the whole world will know about it by now. He’s so stupid! Why would he risk his privacy that he’s worked so hard to get just to come here and visit?

I turn up the volume more and learn that someone stopped him and asked if he was indeed Apollo, and he confirmed his identity. He’s lost his damn mind, that’s all there is to it. I speed out of the parking lot toward home driving way over the speed limit while I try to figure out what’s going on.

I can’t. I can’t think of one conceivable reason Gage would risk his private lifestyle to come here and see me. I made it clear what we had together wasn’t a good idea, although now after a month of therapy, I’m not so sure I was right in making that decision for all of us. Still, no warning, no call, no text ahead of time? He’s just going to show up like this?

I turn onto my street and see a white Infinity SUV parked in my driveway taking up all the space. Did he have to rent the biggest vehicle available? I pull into the neighbor’s driveway and turn around to park in the street, grab my bags, and rush up the front steps with my hair in my mouth, things spilling out of my purse and my sundress all bunched up at the waist.

I throw open the door just as two television trucks come down the street and park at each end of my car. Great, not only are we going to have a media circus, I’m locked in between to trucks preventing me from a speedy escape if I need to make one.

Inside, I drop my purse and yank my dress back into place before pulling my hair out of my eyes. When I look up, five sets of eyes are staring back at me.

Heather is sitting in her rocking chair ringing her hands. Mandy and Wes are here. Mandy is playing with Adley and her old Barbies, and Wes is sitting next to, to…

“Gage?” I ask as I frown and narrow my eyes. The man sitting on the couch has the beautiful long, rock star-woodsman’s hair, but his face is clean shaven, chiseled, younger, hotter, and way sexier. Holy shit, this is Apollo Mercury. This is the rock star who fell off the radar. This is the man every woman on the planet used to drool over and crush hard on.

“Clover,” he says getting up and crossing the room to take me in his arms.

If I wasn’t sure it was him before, I am now. Feeling his arms around me is more familiar than hearing my name spoken aloud. My arms find their way around his neck, and I melt into him—it’s as easy as breathing. No matter what my mind says about being cursed, my heart and soul know this is where I belong, with him, in his arms, in his life.

When he pulls away, I stare up into his beautiful, new-to-me face. I cup his cheek and smooth my thumb over the skin that has been hidden from me since we met. “You’re so handsome under all that fuzz,” I say softly without thinking.

His eyes smile with delight and relief. “I’m glad you like the new old look.”

“More than like it, I adore it. But, you were recognized. There are news trucks outside already.”

Mandy jumps up and yanks back the sheer curtain to see what’s happening outside. “Holy crap, she’s right, they’re everywhere!” she says heading for the door.

“No, don’t go out there. They’ll ask you a million questions,” I warn holding my arm up so she can’t pass us.

“I’ll go out in a bit and make a statement. Right now, someone wants to talk to you about something,” he says looking at Adley.

My eyes go to her and drink her in. It seems like she’s grown a foot in one short month. I’ve missed her so much it hurts. Adley jumps up and hurries into my arms squeezing me tight. I crouch down until we are eye to eye. “Hey there, I’ve missed you.”

“I know. I missed you, too. I knew it was time to talk, though. You ready?” I draw back and raise my brows. “Well, okay then. What are we talking about?”

She looks around the room, and I know she wants to do this in private. “How about we go into the kitchen for a bit?”

Wes stands and walks to the window where his sister is still gawking at the news trucks. “What are you gonna tell ‘em, man?” he asks Gage.

“The truth.”

Wes nods, and Adley pulls on my hand. “The kitchen is this way, sorry.” I lead her into the kitchen, and we sit at the table that overlooks the small backyard where an old swing set still sits, swings swaying in the breeze.

She doesn’t him-haw around. “We love you, Clover, Daddy and me, and I know you love us, too. You need to come back so we won’t be sad anymore. Will you come back? Please?”

“I do love you, you’re right. And, I would love to spend more time with you both, but I’m not sure it’s what’s best for all of us.”

“Why?”

I sigh and fidget in my seat. After going to therapy for weeks now, I’m not exactly sure how to answer that question. “Maybe your daddy and I should talk about this first?”

She shrugs nonchalantly, “Okay, I’ll go get him.”

I take her wrist as she stands. “Wait. You go back to playing with the Barbies, and I’ll talk to him in my own time.”

“When’s that?”

“Soon. It’s just that we haven’t seen or talked to each other in a month.”

“So.”

“So, grown-ups are funny that way. They like to ease into things. Do you want to stay with Heather tonight while your daddy and I go to dinner and talk?”

“Sure, Mandy is fun. I like her.”

“Cool, okay then, let’s see what everybody is doing out there.”

We enter the living room holding hands. Heather smiles nervously and offers everyone something to drink and some cookies which leaves Gage and me alone in the living room as she intended.

I can’t stop staring at him. He’s not my woodsman anymore, he’s not my anything anymore.

“You’re staring,” he says smiling.

“I uh, sorry. I can’t help it. I can’t believe how different you look without that long beard of yours.

“I’m the same dumb, stubborn guy, I can assure you.”

“You’re neither, stop it.”

He perches on the edge of the couch clasping his hands in front of him and resting his forearms on his knees. “How did your talk with Adley go?”

“Fine. Do you know what she wanted to say?”

“I have an idea but not exactly, no.”

“I told her we are going out to dinner tonight. Can you make it?” I ask.

“Sure, we don’t have any plans while we’re here yet. She’ll have to come with us, though.”

“She wants to stay here if that’s all right with you. Heather would love to look after her, and Mandy has more Barbies than any one child ever should have had.”

“You’re sure? I’ve never left her with anyone I didn’t know before.”

“Heather raised me, and you know me.”

“True. I guess that’s good enough for me then. What time and where would you like to go?”

“Are you staying nearby?”

“About ten min away, yeah.”

“Be here at six. What are you going to do about all the media?”

“I had to skirt the media for years. I’m sure I can come up with a disguise.”

“I’m going on a date with a rock star.” I smile, and he rolls his eyes.

“Hardly. I’m just a woodsman with a little girl. My rock-star days are over.”

I turn my head and pop my eyebrows. “We’ll see.”

He leans back on the couch with his hands in his lap. “Are we good? I mean, are we friends at least?”

“Of course, more than friends, I hope.” I lower my eyes and sit on the loveseat across from him in the small living room. Heather’s home is comfortable and clean but not fancy. We all had our own bedrooms growing up. We never wanted for anything thanks to Uncle Carson’s job as a lawyer and Heather being a full-time homemaker. Uncle Carson saved and budgeted, so we always felt safe, but we never lived in a giant house the way my friends assumed. They thought lawyer equaled billionaire not quaint four-bedroom home on a cul-de-sac far from the beach.

“Gage, I’m sorry for the way we left things. I started therapy when we got back to California. I know, or at least I’m learning, that I’m not cursed. I still wonder, though, is this the life you want? I mean, you’ve only stepped off of an airplane and driven to my house, and there are news trucks all over the place outside. I thought if you came out to the world at all you were going to do it slowly, carefully.” I point to the front window. “That’s definitely not slow or careful.”

A hoop of laughter goes up in the kitchen behind me. There is a wall separating us, no open-concept modern house for my aunt and uncle. They like the separation of rooms by walls unlike the rest of the world.

“Why don’t we talk about this later and go join them for now? It’s been a long flight, I want to look at your beautiful face for a while.”

“Tonight, at dinner then?”

“Yes. Tonight, at dinner.”

“All right, come on, my aunt makes the best sweet tea you’ve ever tasted.”

We join the family, and I watch them interact with Adley and Gage like they’ve been here all along. Like they’ve been a fixture here as long as me. Like they belong because they do.