This week has been chaotic with Rae having a random cold in the middle of summer, work’s picked up, and Jason has been calling. I appreciate his concerns and attention. I’m not ungrateful, but having conversations with him on the phone proves to me how much I like him. He even talked to Rae last night, since she was feeling better. She giggled the entire time and asked when she’d see him again.
She’s not the only one who wants to see him again.
“Mommy,” I look over at Rae, who is coloring at the small kitchen table.
“Yes, baby?”
“Are you and Jason boyfriend and girlfriend?” Her focus is on her paper, as if this conversation is as casual as asking for a glass of water.
“Ummm… no.” I shake my head although she’s not looking at me.
“Why not?” Her head snaps up and her brown eyes are full of questions.
“Things don’t work that way.”
“But he takes you out. He plays with me. He likes us, and we like him. He’s nice to us.” This right here is a six-year-old’s guide to relationships.
“Well, it’s about more than that.” A sneeze interrupts me.
“Bless you.”
“Thanks. Anyway, before adults get in a serious relationship, they have to know who the person is. You know, make sure they really like them.”
“Don’t you really like Jason?”
“I think so. Yeah.”
“So?”
“Well, we haven’t really spent a lot of time together. Sure, we’ve gone out a couple of times, but adults need more time to talk and have adult conversations.”
“Okay, so go out with him again.”
“You wouldn’t mind?”
“Nope.” Her hands are crossed over her paper. “If that will make him your boyfriend, I want you to.”
“You really are okay with Jason being in our lives.” She’s so smart about some things it surprises me. I guess when I was her age, I knew what a boyfriend was. To a certain extent.
“I know he’s not my daddy,” her eyes cast downward. “But he can kinda be like one.”
I stand and walk toward her, crouching next to her and moving her body so she’s facing me. “I know you wish your dad was around. I’m sorry he’s not.”
Rae sniffles and looks at me with thick tears in her eyes. “Oh, baby girl.” I pull her to me. I have no idea how to make this right. She’s too young to understand, but I know that spending time with Jason has emphasized her need for a father figure.
I hold her to me and hum in her ear. Her small hands grip my back with force. “It’s okay. It seems like things with Jason are going well. Maybe he will become my boyfriend.” I realize I’m saying it to comfort both her and I. I may have thought my chances of finding someone who would accept Rae and I were slim, but Jason may be the odd man who does.
Once Rae is tucked in bed for the evening, I see the message Jason sent an hour ago asking if I were free to talk. I begin to type my response and delete it. Instead, I call him. I want him to know I’m interested and being confident is attractive. It’s silly to send him a text message saying I can talk just for him to call me. I put on my big girl panties and hit call on my phone.
“Hey, beautiful.” His voice vibrates happiness as he answers the call.
“Hey.” I curl on the couch and smile.
“How are you? How’s Rae feeling?”
“We’re good. She’s much better. Almost one hundred percent.”
“Good. Being sick sucks, I can imagine it’s harder on a little kid.”
“You have no idea.”
“How was your day?” Jason asks. His voice is soft.
“Busy, but that means better tips.” I shrug as if he were here. I wish he were. “I’m happy Rae is feeling like herself again. How was your day?”
“Good. We got asked to work on a song for the soundtrack of a new movie. We’re waiting on more details, but it’s a cool honor.”
“That is really cool. What movie?”
“Peyton didn’t tell us the title, but we know it’s a war movie. We’ll get more details from the music producer of the film soon.”
“Well, look at you being all popular and stuff,” I tease.
Jason chuckles. “People like our music.”
“They should. You guys are talented,” I compliment.
“Thanks. So, I was wondering if you’re free tomorrow night. I want to take you out.”
I sneeze before I can respond. “Bless you,” Jason says. “Are you getting sick?”
“Thanks. No, it was just a sneeze.” I don’t have time to get sick. I sneeze again, causing Jason to go into protective mode.
“Yes, you are. I’m coming over and I’m bringing medicine and a few other things.”
“You don’t have to, Jason. I’m sure I have something here I can take.” Truth is, I have all the medicine required for any child’s sickness, but I don’t buy medicine for adults. It’s not often I get sick, and I do believe this is just the sniffles.
“You can argue with me, but I’m coming anyway. I’ll see you in a bit, stay where you are.”
Where the hell am I going to go?
I don’t have a chance to respond because Jason hangs up on me. I sigh and lean into the couch. He’s worried over nothing. A cold is nothing I can’t deal with.
I turn on the TV and watch reruns of Friends. Thankfully, I don’t need cable to watch this. It could be worse; I could have no TV and no entertainment. Internet is a luxury, and it’s not like I have a computer anyway. What would I even search?
I’m half way through the second episode of Friends when Jason knocks on my door. I open to find his brows furrowed and his hands full of bags.
Laughing, I say, “You’re ridiculous. You didn’t have to come.”
“I wanted to. You take care of Rae, but who takes care of you?” His question is full of meaning, and I stare at him, speechless. “Come on.”
He walks in, setting the bags he brought on the kitchen table. “I bought cold medicine, Emergen-C, cough drops, and chicken soup.”
“How much medicine did you buy?” I look through the bag.
“I didn’t know exactly how bad it was, so I got enough for each symptom.”
“You’re insane.” I shake my head. “I promise I’m okay.”
“I want to take care of you. Let me.” He inches closer, the plead evident in his voice.
I smile and relax. “Thank you. I do appreciate it.” It will take some getting used to, having someone around to take care of me.
“Now, what do you want to drink first?”
“How about Emergen-C since the only symptom I have is a sneeze. It will help build my immune system.”
Jason nods as I grab a glass of water and empty the vitamin into it. “Do you want something to drink?”
“Water would be great.”
Cups in hand, we sit on the couch. I cringe a little when I drink the liquid and Jason laughs.
“It’s not that bad.”
“I hate taking any sort of medicine, even if it is a vitamin.”
“Well, I want you healthy.” He pulls me into him with his arm around my shoulder. I relax, placing my head on the crook of his neck. He’s comfortable. He’s what I would imagine my future looking like, minus the famous status.
I exhale. “Thank you for coming.” The only bad thing about this cold is I can’t visit my parents until Rae and I are both completely healthy.
“You’re welcome.” Jason kisses the top of my head. I have no idea what he’s thinking, but by the way he’s holding me, I can assume his thoughts are similar to mine. I briefly know what happened with his ex-girlfriend, and I can take away from that conversation that he isn’t one to succumb to games. I’m glad about that, because with Rae in my life, games are a hard limit.
We stay like this for a bit, silence surrounding us except for the beating of our hearts. I could get used to this—always having Jason around.
“I guess if you’re sick, tomorrow night would be a no-go.” Jason’s fingers tickle my arm as he runs them over my skin. I shiver as my skin becomes covered in goosebumps.
“You act as if I’m dying.” I peek up at him.
“Don’t joke that way.” The panic in his voice makes me laugh and warms my heart. I sit up and look at him. I hold his face and stare into those blue orbs I love.
“It’s a measly cold. What did you have in mind?”
“I wanted to cook dinner for you at my place.” I tense for a moment. “Don’t worry, that’s not code word for Netflix and chill.” I raise my eyebrows, confused. “You know, Netflix and chill. Never mind.” Jason shakes his head.
“No, now I want to know.”
“What I’m saying is nothing has to happen just because I want you to come over. I want to spend time with you, and I hope my cooking skills sway you more in the direction of team Jason.”
I laugh at his big puppy dog eyes. “I can handle that. I’d just want to double check with Abigail and make sure she can watch Rae.”
“You let me know.” He leans in and kisses my lips. Before he can pull away, my hands reach around the back of his head, and I kiss him back. It’s a TV appropriate kiss, but it’s more satisfying than the soft peck.
Jason grins with an arched brow. I smile as a blush creeps up my neck. I’ve always hated that I turn pink immediately. Jason rubs his thumb against my cheek saying, “So beautiful.” He gives me a peck on the lips. Now I’m sure my smile is matching his.
“Cole is moving in with Bri. He told me today.”
“That’s good, right?” I tilt my head and look up at him.
“It is. I’m happy for them. We had an agreement that if either of us wanted to move, the other could take over the ownership or sell.”
“What are you going to do?” My eyes wander across his face for any signs of an answer.
“I love my house. I’m not moving.” He pulls me closer.
“Tell me about your friends,” I request.
“Well, you know about Cole and Bri. Cash and Olivia have been married for a few years. I’m sure you know that. Honestly, they’re some of the best people I know. Ryder is inappropriate at times, but his wife is equally inappropriate, so they work.”
“Sounds like a great group of friends.” I yawn and wiggle closer to Jason.
He chuckles and holds me tighter. “They are.”
“Thank you again so much, Abby.” I hug her. “I owe you.”
“You don’t owe me anything. Have fun tonight,” she winks.
I bend down to give Rae a hug and kiss. “See ya later.” I pull her in tightly.
“Have fun, Mommy.”
“I will, baby. Behave and listen to what Abby and Blake say, okay?” I know she will, but it’s the mandatory parent speech. She was so excited when I told her this morning I was going out with Jason. Our talk yesterday afternoon helped clear the air.
I give her one last hug and kiss before walking back to my house. Jason should be here soon to pick me up. I won’t tell him, but I woke up feeling a little sick, so I’ve moved up to cold medicine instead of vitamins only. He’d probably cancel our plans if he knew, and I want to see him. Last night was nice. It was… I’m not sure I have a word for it, but I wanted more of that feeling.
Back at my place, I make sure I have what I need in my purse and check the time. I scheduled my medicine intake so that I would be able to take another dose right before our date.
I finish drinking my water as a knock vibrates around my home. It’s odd he drove this way to pick me up to go back to his house, but there’s also a romantic feel to it.
“Hi,” Jason looks at me with appreciation when I open the door. I’m not sure why. My outfit is simple—jeans, a faux silk black tank, and black sandals.
“Hey.” I smile and hold in my sneeze. I know you’re not supposed to, but sneezing right now would break this greeting.
“Gorgeous,” Jason whispers and leans in to kiss my cheek. “Is Rae already over at Abigail’s?” I love that he asks.
“I dropped her off a little while ago.”
“Was she upset or okay?”
“She’s okay. We actually had a conversation yesterday afternoon, which helped her to kinda understand this dynamic.”
Jason nods. “Ready to go then?”
When he pulls up to his house, I try not to stare. It’s beautiful, though. The porch is big, leading up to it are three brick steps. The cream siding gives it an airy feel from the outside. Despite being a famous musician, the home is relatively modest. I was expecting bigger and flashier, although after getting to know Jason, I should know better than to think that.
“It’s a beautiful house,” I tell him as he opens my door.
“Thank you. We didn’t need much when we were looking to buy. This place has everything we need, plus I love the amount of land we have. I hate having neighbors so close to me.
I look around, taking in the surrounding area as the sun sets. It’s probably about an acre of land in total. The front driveway has a decent amount of space, but I’m guessing most of the land is in the back.
As soon as Jason opens the door for me, the smell of garlic and herbs hits me. If he wanted to impress me with his cooking, he’s off to a great start. He holds my hand as he leads me further into his house. I look around, taking it all in. It’s modern, yet cozy, with warm tones. This is definitely not what I was expecting.
“Do you want the tour now or after we eat?” Jason interrupts my observation.
“Either way. Smells good.”
“Thanks. It’s almost ready. I’m making chicken in a creamed herb sauce and mashed potatoes. The chicken is cooked and so are the mashed potatoes. I’ll just need to warm up the potatoes and make the cream sauce.”
“That sounds great.” We walk into his kitchen. Granite countertops and stainless-steel appliances adorn it, but what catches my eye is the plate setting. He already has everything set up on the kitchen bar that extends like a peninsula. He even used place mats, and a candle and vase of flowers are set in the center.
“Wow,” I whisper. This is a first for me.
“Do you like it?” He hugs me from behind.
I nod. “It’s beautiful.”
“I’m glad you think so.” He kisses my cheek and turns on the candle. “Take a seat and I’ll make the sauce. I have white wine chilled, and red in the wine fridge. Which do you prefer?”
“White would be great.” I sit on the stool, in awe of the trouble he’s going through for a dinner. Is this what people do on dates? Maybe it’s not trouble to him.
Jason winks as he serves me a glass of wine. With the medicine I’m drinking, I should limit myself to this one glass.
He cooks, and I watch him. When I asked if he needed help he shook his head and told me to stay put. We talk about everything, including where I grew up. I’ve opened up to him, feeling as if I can trust him with anything.
As I stare at the setting on the counter, I take in the details. The plates are ceramic, not paper, the silverware is also real, and there’s even a spoon for dessert. He’s thought of everything, and the food smells delicious.
“Who taught you to cook?”
“We grew up helping my momma in the kitchen. She always made it a family event. My sisters and I would fight about who would make what, but being the oldest usually helped in getting the fun responsibilities, like chopping.”
“That sounds like fun.” My mom and I used to bake when I was younger, but once she got sick that ended. It’s why I like to involve Rae in the kitchen and love when she says she wants to bake for a living. It brings back memories.
“Do you like cooking? I mean, I’ve seen you cook, but do you enjoy it?”
“I do. I was just remembering when my mom and I used to bake when I was a child. I try to keep that going with Rae. She loves being a part of our meal preps. She even has a step-stool, so she can reach the countertop.”
“I think it’s great you implement your own memories into her upbringing. How’s your mom?”
“My dad says she’s okay. He always says that. I told him once Rae and I got over our cold we’d go visit. It’s been longer than usual between visits.” My mom has outlived the original span they gave her when she was diagnosed. She’s going on ten years, and every time I call my dad I dread hearing him say she’s worsened.
“That’s a good idea. I’m sure your dad would love to see the both of you. Although your mom may not recognize you or her, I’m sure somewhere inside she’d feel your presence.”
My stomach grumbles as I inhale the smell coming from the stove. Whatever Jason is putting in that sauce must taste as good as it smells. I watch as he stirs the pot, adding ingredients. His confidence spreads through the kitchen as he moves with ease and knowingness.
“Dinner is almost ready. Do you want another glass of wine?”
“I’m okay for now. Still got some in here.” I raise my glass to show him. When he frowns, I say, “I’m taking it slow since I took some of the medicine you brought me.”
“Are you feeling worse?”
“No, no,” I fib. “More as preventative care.”
Jason squints his eyes as he scans my face. “If you say so, but I’ll take you home at any time if you feel sick.”
I tilt my head and look at him. “I’m okay. I want to be here.” He groans and tilts his head back.
“I want you here.” He stands on the opposite side of the counter, leaning into it as his hands hold the edge. That one sentence expresses more meaning, but I don’t dwell on it. We’re starting off, and we have time for everything else a relationship entails.
Is it crazy of me to envision Rae and I here, with him, living as a family? It totally is. I drink the contents of my glass and Jason lifts his brows in my direction.
“Thirsty,” I shrug.
He turns to the stove with a proud smile and flips the chicken breasts, pouring some of the sauce over them. “This is ready.” Jason plates the chicken and mashed potatoes, drizzling sauce over them. He moves around the peninsula and takes the stool next to mine, refilling both of our glasses with white wine.
“Cheers,” he raises his glass. “To the gorgeous woman sitting with me tonight and that I get lucky enough to have more nights like this.”
“Cheers.” He’s such a sap, but the romantic in me chewed it all up.
I take a bit of the chicken, savoring all the flavors. “This is delicious, Jason.”
“Thanks. I’m glad you like it. It’s one of my favorite recipes.”
The flavors in the food pop with each bite I take. This is by far one of the best meals I’ve ever had.
“Which is your favorite recipe?” I ask him, curious about the extent of his cooking skills, although this is impressive.
“Actually, my favorite thing to do is grill. There’s not much to it, but I enjoy the whole process.”
“My favorite thing to cook is chicken Alfredo. I love the creaminess of homemade Alfredo sauce.”
“I make a mean Alfredo sauce. Next time you come over, we’ll cook that.”
I envision Jason and I cooking in the kitchen together like a real couple. A more intimate couple.
When we finish eating, Jason clears the setting without letting me help. He said I’m a guest in his home and he’s trying to woo me. Little does he know I’m beyond wooed. Never has anyone done something like this.
“I confess, I didn’t make dessert. This is store bought, but I can guarantee it’s as good as homemade.” He pulls out a foil container from the warming drawer. “Peach cobbler.”
“Oh.”
He frowns. “You don’t like peach cobbler?”
“I’m allergic to peach.” I bite down my lip.
“What? Shit, I should’ve asked before. I just didn’t think… I’ve never met anyone allergic to peach.” His hand attacks his hair as he speaks. When he looks up at me, my attempt to bite back my smile fails. “You’re shitting me, aren’t you?”
I throw my head back and laugh. “You… should’ve seen… oh my God, that was funny.” I gasp for air.
He stalks toward me and turns my stool. “Funny?”
I wipe tears from my eyes and look at him. “So funny.”
“I thought I had screwed up the entire evening.”
I drape my arms around his neck. “Even if I were allergic, this is still the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. Thank you, Jason.”
“Sweeter than peach cobbler?”
“So much sweeter.” He leans down and kisses me, careful at first until I sigh, opening my mouth. His tongue sweeps mine, and I lean into him.
“Let’s have dessert,” his voice is hoarse.
“I do love peach cobbler,” I tell him.
“I freaked.”
“So much.” I laugh again. Being here tonight has been a salvation. I’m free to be the person I was, the person I thought I could no longer be because I am a mom now.