Jesse
As I roughly scrubbed a towel over my head, I winced at the pain. I’d really gone to town on the bourbon last night and had a headache to prove my stupidity this morning. Thankfully, the bottle had already been half empty, otherwise things could have been a whole lot worse. I could still taste the vanilla of the Wild Turkey and felt a little queasy every now and again, but I’d manage. The shower had certainly helped.
I looked in the mirror above the sink in my bathroom in the cabin, and sighed. Apart from the grey under my eyes, I didn’t look any different. Not that I’d expected to see a sign around my neck saying, ‘Stupid Husband Last to Know’ or anything like that. But you’d think finding out a whole bunch of shit like I had, might just leave you looking haunted or broken. Yet I didn’t, and I didn’t feel it either. Finding out my wife was a cheat, surprisingly wasn’t the thing that hurt the most, neither was it the fact that she was leaving. It was heart breaking that Brandon had left Melody to die at the side of the road. That had torn my insides apart; for her. No one deserved to die alone like that, especially when the man who claims to love you is watching nearby. No, the thing that crucified me the most, the thing that caused me pain and suffering, was Addy. She was leaving Addy, hadn’t even acknowledged her existence to the man she was running away to. And I couldn’t fathom how, as a mother, Melody could do that? Then I’d pushed Addy away, too. I abandoned her all over again, and as long as I live, I will never forgive myself. For two years, my poor baby had only my parents and my brother to rely on, when she should’ve had her momma and daddy.
When Dad had brought me the letter, I screwed it up and threw it on the floor, with no intention of reading it, but curiosity killed the cat and all that. Yeah, so she’d said she loved me once, hoo-fucking-rah for Melody. Once isn’t how you should love your husband, it should be for life. And as for your child, that love should be beyond life, into death. Melody though, well she’d just about mentioned Addy in her damn letter. Christ, the ‘give Addy a kiss for me’ had been a fucking p.s. That’s all Addy was to her, a p.s.; an afterthought. She didn’t even say goodbye for fuck’s sake.
As for Brandon, well I didn’t know what to do about him. I ought to go to the sheriff and tell them about him leaving Melody, but who would that hurt except his mom and dad? They were getting older and needed him to help with their guest ranch. His brother, Wade, lived in Alaska working at Prudhoe Bay Oilfield, and only came home every six months, so he was no help. I’d see to it that Brandon never worked another ranch again, but I couldn’t hurt his parents while doing it. At least that might make him focus on getting his folk’s place right. Anyway, I thought with a sigh, life was too fucking short. I at least had Millie, my beautiful girl who had put me back together when I was broken, almost beyond repair.
With a deep breath, to push back another bought of nausea, I grabbed my clothes, suddenly in a rush to get to Millie and Addy.
When I walked into the house, Mom almost dropped the plate of sandwiches that she was holding.
“Daddy,” Addy screamed and ran super-fast towards me, her arms outstretched.
“Hey, baby,” I said, catching her and pulling her up against my chest and squeezing tight. “You okay?”
“Yes, Daddy. Are you okay? You were crying.”
I looked at Mom who was chewing on her thumb. I could see the trepidation in her eyes and while I’d screamed at her the day before, I’d calmed down enough to realize she’d done what she thought was best.
“I’m fine, Addy. I just felt sad about something.”
“Granma said you had bad news,” she replied sagely. “Did you all have bad news? Because you were all crying.”
“Yes, baby, we did, but it’s okay now. I’m better now.” I smiled at Mom and my heart lurched when her shoulders sagged with relief. I fucking hated that I’d put her and Dad through so much shit over the last two years, but it was over now.
I kissed Addy and put her down on the floor and moved over to Mom, taking her into a hug.
“I’m sorry, Momma.”
“Oh, sweetheart,” she said on a broken sob. “I should have told you, it’s my fault. I made Garratt keep quiet.”
“No Mom, there’s only two people to blame for what happened yesterday and neither of them are in our lives anymore.”
“What are you going to do about him?” she asked hesitantly.
“Nothing.” I kissed her cheek and moved over to the coffee jug. “I figure it’s enough he has to live with what he did. He’ll never work another ranch, I’ll make sure of it, so maybe now he’ll do what he was supposed to be doing and sort his folk’s ranch out.”
“He deserves to go to jail, though,” she said, her chin wobbling as she spoke. “He blackmailed her and left her.”
“Hey,” I soothed, rubbing a hand over her hair. “Pay no mind to him, Mom. Just make sure you keep Dad away from him. As for Melody, well she made her own bed, so to speak.”
We both laughed quietly and then dropped into silence. Finally, Mom turned to me.
“You want something to eat?” she asked as she moved to the counter where bread and cheese were sitting.
I did feel kind of hungry, and maybe it’d stop the sickly feeling.
“Yeah, that’d be good Mom. I need to speak to Millie first though, where is she?”
“Her room I think, I told her I’d look after Addy this morning.” She looked at me from under her lashes. “I don’t think she slept too well.”
My heart dropped as I remembered how I screamed at her. Yelled at her to get out of my sight. God, I’d been a total shit, but I couldn’t think straight. The only thing I had in my head was pain and the need to be alone.
“I’ll go get her,” I said and made my way to the stairs.
“Daddy,” Addy hissed as I passed her.
“What, baby?”
She beckoned me down to her level.
“Millie isn’t there,” she whispered. “She’s gone to buy Granma a present.”
I frowned, wondering why she was buying a present for Mom. It wasn’t her birthday, and we were four months off Christmas.
“What sort of present?” I asked.
“I don’t know,” Addy shrugged. “But I think she’s getting it from the airoport.”
“Do you mean the airport?” I asked, a little concerned, but not sure why.
“That’s what I said, the airoport,” Addy pouted.
“Okay, baby, but what makes you say that?”
I looked at Mom, and I knew that she was pretending not to listen because she was cutting the cheese real slow, and her head was cocked towards us.
“I heard her on the telephone,” Addy said leaning closer to my ear. “She said, I’ll pick up at the airoport.”
“Mom, when did Millie go out?” I asked anxiously.
“A couple of hours ago, why?” Mom put the knife down and took a step towards me. “Jesse?”
“I need to check something.” I rushed up the stairs and to the back of the house, into Millie’s bedroom.
I turned in a circle, my eyes trying to spot something, anything, yet hoping I didn’t. I flung open the door to her closet and flicked through her clothes. I had no clue what I was looking for because, while I always feasted my eyes on Millie, I couldn’t tell you if any of the clothes I’d seen her in were missing; her beautiful face was what I always looked at, not her clothes so much. The slinky red top wasn’t there, that she’d worn that night at Rowdy’s, but it might well be in the laundry for all I knew.
“Fuck,” I cursed, slamming the door shut.
“What’s got into you, cowboy?”
Auntie Ruby appeared at the open door, looking tired and a little dishevelled. I guess I’d woken her from her nap.
“I think Millie’s left, but I can’t be sure.”
“Well, call me Uncle Walter with a dress on, but have you tried her cell phone?”
I let out a groan, wondering why I hadn’t thought of that. I took out my phone, pressed her number, and waited while the cell rang out in my ear. No answer, with it finally going to voicemail.
“Millie, baby, it’s me just checking where you are. Call me back, sweetness.”
“Jesse!” Mom’s voice was loud as I heard her running up the stairs.
“What is it?” I asked, meeting her outside Addy’s bedroom door.
She shoved her cell in my face.
Millie: Hi Bonnie. So sorry I didn’t say goodbye but I can’t stay and be rejected again. I love Jesse but he isn’t ready to move on. I said goodbye to Addy but she thinks I’m shopping. Please tell her I love her very much and I’ll call her soon. The truck is at the long stay car park at the departure gate of the airport. Level 3 Row W. Paid for three days in case you can’t get here. Thank you for everything and I’ll call you soon – Millie x
“No fucking way!” I yelled, throwing Mom’s cell phone down the hall, towards Millie’s bedroom door.
“Jesse, what are you going to do?”
“Go and get her,” I snapped, moving past her. “She’s the damn love of my life, Mom, and I am not losing her, no matter how stubborn and annoying she damn well is.”
Auntie Ruby started cackling “Yay, go get her cowboy.”