Epilogue – 7 years later
Millie
To say that Jesse was freaking out was an understatement. His baby girl was about to fly the nest and he was hating every single minute of it. Addy had been accepted on a Gifted Child program at a specialist School two hours away, and Addy being Addy, said she wanted to board. She was just eleven, so Jesse being Jesse said, ‘hell will freeze over first’. Addy being Addy, had wrapped her daddy around her little finger and he was now packing up the truck to take her.
“I fucking hate this,” he muttered to me as he heaved a suitcase into the flatbed of the truck. “I don’t know why she can’t come home every day.”
As he turned to face me, I saw the utter grief etched over his handsome features. I ran my fingers through his hair, brushing it away from his beautiful eyes and kissed him gently.
“Baby, she wants to do this. She’s going to be home every Thursday evening.”
“Yeah, until some science club or reading group starts, or she makes friends with some rich kid who wants her to do sleepovers, or some other shit. Then,” he cried throwing his hands into the air, “the next thing, there’ll be some little dickwad with hormones who thinks he’s a fucking stud!”
I couldn’t help but laugh at my husband’s little temper tantrum. It was evident now where our youngest, Hunter, got his temper from. He was only two, but could throw a fit with the best of them. Clemmie, or Clementine to give her proper name, our six year old, was all me. With her olive skin, big brown eyes, and black hair, her Spanish side was prominent. Thankfully, she hadn’t inherited a Spanish or Connor temper and was so relaxed she should have had a mattress strapped to her back. Hunter and Addy, however, were Connor’s through and through, both in looks and temperament.
“It ain’t funny, Armalita,” Jesse growled, and I knew that I was in trouble. I was only ever Armalita when I was in trouble.
“Oh, come on, it is,” I giggled. “You know none of that is going to happen.”
“How do I?”
Jesse pouted and kicked at a stone that ricocheted off the hub cap of his old truck. Yes, he still had it. He said he couldn’t get rid of it because of the happy memories it gave him; memories of us having amazing sex on the front seat, the night we’d argued over Brandon. In fact, we couldn’t be sure, but we think Hunter was conceived on that front seat. We’d been to Rowdy’s and I’d got drunk, so when Jesse parked up at the side of the house, I pounced on him and rode him until he bellowed my name. In return, Jesse gave me two amazing orgasms and possibly a baby. We’d loved it, and over breakfast neither of us could stop grinning. That was until Ted told Jesse he needed to sort the suspension out on the truck, ‘because it made the noise of a creaking gate the whole time you were going at it’.
“She loves you too much to not want to come home,” I replied. “Plus, there’s Dapple, she will not leave that horse for long.”
Jesse grinned, realising that the horse that he’d finally bought and given in to letting Addy break in by herself, was probably going to ensure his baby girl came home every weekend.
“Told you it was a good idea,” he muttered.
“You told me?” I gasped. “I think you’ll find it was me that kept hearing ‘Momma please ask Daddy if I can have a horse to break in by myself…Momma did you ask Daddy… Momma why is Daddy so mean about me having a horse’.”
Jesse let out a laugh and dragged me into his embrace.
“Did I tell you today that I love you?”
“Nope,” I said with pouty lips. “You didn’t.”
“I sure did show you this morning though, didn’t I?”
Jesse’s low, sexy drawl had me wanting to drag him to our room and rip his clothes off. Nothing had changed in that respect over the last seven years; I still fancied the pants of him, and did whenever possible.
“How about you show me again, when you get back. I’ll get the kids to bed and then maybe I’ll put on that sexy underwear that you bought me for Christmas.”
Jesse moaned and pushed himself against me, so I was in no doubt what his answer was. The rock hard dick straining against his jeans said it all.
“Good thing Mom and Dad moved out of the house,” he groaned. “Because I’m gonna fuck you so long and so hard you’ll be screaming my name.”
“Don’t I always?”
Jesse took my mouth in his and gave me a long, intoxicating kiss that fired up all my senses.
“Baby, we need to stop, Addy will be back from seeing your mum and dad in a minute.”
Bonnie and Ted had moved out of the house once Hunter was born. Not only did we need the room to accommodate three rowdy, growing children, but Hunter was not a good sleeper and he disturbed everyone in the house pretty much every night. Jesse had built them a cabin house just on the other side of the pasture, opposite our house. He’d got a construction company to come in and build them a fantastic home, all done to Jesse’s specification. It was beautiful and modern, yet still retaining the rustic feel that Bonnie had missed from the main house after Jesse had developed it. I told Jesse that once he finished ranching, if Hunter didn’t want to take over, then he should sell up and go into construction design because he had a great eye for it. He just laughed and said hell would freeze over before this ranch belonged to anyone but a Connor. He really did have a thing about hell freezing over one day.
“Okay,” Jesse said, pulling away from me. “You’re right, but you’d better be naked and waiting for me when I get home.”
“You can count on it.”
“So, did Garratt say what time he was getting here this weekend?”
I grinned, knowing that Jesse’s change of subject was to try and erase pictures of me naked from his mind and ease his hard on before Addy came back.
“Probably early evening on Thursday. He wants to be here when the bus drops Addy back.”
“Ah, she’ll love that.”
Addy still adored her Uncle Garratt and had no idea that he was coming over next weekend, because we hadn’t told her we were going to have a party to celebrate her first week at her new school.
“I’m still not happy about her coming home on a bus, though.” Jesse ran a hand down his face and I knew that he was starting to struggle again, but the bus was the best option.
Because it was a school for gifted children, and lessons were much more intense, they only attended school for four days of the week then, on a Thursday afternoon, various buses transported all the kids home. That’s why Jesse’s truck was full to bursting. We’d had to buy Addy a duplicate of everything that she had at home, just so she wouldn’t have to haul things on the bus every weekend.
“We’ll see how it goes and if she doesn’t like it, or you’re not happy, then maybe I can collect her.”
“No, honey. That’s a four hour round trip that I do not want you doing, especially if you had to take the kids with you. Can you imagine my fucking stress levels? My whole life in one fucking car, without me. Nope, not happening. If necessary, I’ll hire a driver, or send one of the boys.”
Before I could say anything else, Addy came skipping around the corner from saying goodbye to her grandparents. She was really excited, but when she saw Jesse’s face, she slowed to a walk.
“Baby, don’t spoil this for her,” I whispered.
Jesse looked up at me and nodded.
“Come on then, Adaline Marie Connor, let’s get you to school.” He plastered on a smile and held his hand out to Addy.
It was at that moment I saw it hit Addy; she was going away from her family and while it was an exciting time, the realization of not being on the ranch every day and being with all of us was suddenly a little daunting.
I knew how she felt, leaving Mum and Javi behind permanently had been heart wrenching, but I loved Jesse and Addy and couldn’t imagine a life without them. Thankfully, Mum and Javi were able to visit at least every eighteen months or so and Jesse had even spoken to them about coming out here to live. Mum missed her grandbabies and Javi wanted a fresh start, so I was forever hopeful.
As I looked down at Addy, I saw her bottom lip tremble, just as it had that first day I met her. Then tears started to roll slowly down her cheeks.
“Hey,” Jesse soothed, pulling her into his arms. “It’s gonna be fine, you’ll love every minute of it.”
I watched him brush his hands through her long blonde hair and I couldn’t have loved him any more if I’d tried. He could easily have used her fears to persuade her to stay, but he didn’t; he was doing what he knew she wanted and what was best for her.
“Momma,” Addy sobbed and pulled away from Jesse to wrap her thin little arms around my waist. “I’m going to miss you, so much.”
“I’ll miss you too, sweetie, but you’ll be home before you know it. It’s just four days, that’s all. Think of it this way. It’s four days without Clemmie wanting you to play tea parties, or Hunter trying to stop you from reading by slapping his sticky hands all over your book. Okay?”
She looked up at me with tear filled eyes and nodded. God, I loved this child with all my heart, as much as if she were my own. I had loved her pretty much from the moment I met her, much the same as I had her father, but the first time she called me ‘momma,’ I fell even harder. It had been the day of our wedding, here on the ranch, a service held in the pasture, and then a reception in a marquee that Jesse and the boys erected. Jesse and I were having our first dance to Etta James’ ‘At Last’, when Addy tugged on Jesse’s perfectly tailored suit jacket and said, ‘May I have this dance with my momma?’. With both of us crying, Jesse, Addy, and I all danced together and I had never been happier.
“I love you,” I whispered, and kissed her head that I was clutching to my chest.
“I love you too, Momma.” She lifted her head and beautiful blue eyes stared up at me. “Momma?”
“Yes, Addy,” I replied, smoothing down her hair.
“Will you give Clemmie the box of hearts?” she asked. “Tell her what she needs to do.”
I nodded and held my breath to hold back the sob.
“Tell her that she needs to be really careful,” she said earnestly. “Only give people their heart when she knows it’s right. When she knows it’s true love.”
With more tears, I gave her one final squeeze. “I will, I promise.”
I didn’t want to let go, but she had to be booked in at the halls of residence by four, and it was already one-thirty. Jesse had asked me to go along, but I thought he needed to be alone with Addy for the two hour drive. They were as close as father and daughter could be, did everything together; rode out on a Sunday morning together, went fishing together, she’d even been known to go out with him during calving season, sometimes at night, too if there had been a difficult birth. That we’d argued about, but Jesse was adamant that his girls should learn everything that he would eventually teach Hunter.
As I let Addy go, Jesse kneeled down in front of her and took hold of her hands.
“Okay?”
She nodded. “Yes, Daddy.”
“That’s my girl, but remember; if at any time you want to come home, you just pick up a phone and no matter what is happening on this ranch, I will leave and come and get you. You are my precious baby, my first born, and I will always be there for you.”
Jesse swallowed hard, pushing Addy’s hair away from her face, while I had to swipe away a tear from my cheek.
“I wasn’t always the best daddy,” he said quietly. “I know that, but I always loved you. You, your sister and brother, and your momma are my life and if anything happened to any of you, my heart would be broken, but I’d carry on for the rest of you. But when Momma Melody died, I forgot that you needed me even more than ever before, and I’ll be forever sorry for that. Just know that you’re my angel and I adore and love you.”
Jesse coughed to hide the emotion in his voice, but he couldn’t help but let out a heart wrenching groan when Addy flung her arms around his neck and squeezed him with every bit of strength that she had.
“I know you love me, Daddy, you were just a little bit broken, until Momma came to live with us,” she said against his neck.
Now my tears careened as fast as white water falls down my face and I could see that Jesse was struggling to hold it together.
“Yes, Addy, I was a little bit broken, and your momma did heal me, but I should never have let you think that I didn’t care about you, and I should never have neglected you the way I did. I guess my head was up my ass for a while.”
“Jesse!” I scolded through tearful laughter.
“It’s okay, Momma. I know not to say that.”
I patted Addy’s head and gave Jesse one of my looks that I used on the kids when I was disappointed with them. Jesse, like the kids, just laughed.
“Okay sweetie, you ready?”
Addy nodded and wiped at her face before turning to me.
“I love you Momma, and tell Clemmie and Hunter I’ll see them on Thursday.”
I nodded, unable to speak. We’d left Clemmie and Hunter with Bella, Trent the foreman’s wife, thinking that it would all be too traumatic for them as they wouldn’t understand that Addy was actually coming back. Jesse had worked horses for the last five years, as well as having 650 pairs on the ranch, so he needed a foreman and Trent had become invaluable. He and Bella lived in Jesse’s old cabin that we had also extended.
Jesse had offered the job to Zak, but with twin boys, a terror of a three year old girl and Sarah to keep check on, he’d turned it down. Sarah still caused havoc when we had girl’s night and she was my best friend who I loved like a sister.
“I’ll see you in a few hours, honey,” Jesse said and leaned forward to take my mouth in a soft kiss. “I love you.”
“I love you, too, both of you.”
I waved goodbye until I could no longer see the truck, and then stood waiting for a few more minutes. I kind of hoped that they’d come back and Addy would say she’d changed her mind, but they didn’t.
When Jesse got home just before dinner, he looked thoroughly washed out; today had been hard on him. What he’d said to Addy was true. After Melody died, he couldn’t see past his own grief and pushed away the most precious gift that he’d been given. The one decent thing that Melody had done for him. Thankfully, Addy didn’t suffer any long term effects of that time and in some ways, it made her love for Jesse even stronger, and his for her.
“You okay, baby?” I asked as he dropped his forehead to my shoulder, his hands resting on my hips.
“I will be. It was hard, you know.”
“I know, but I’ll make it better for you.”
Jesse lifted his head and grinned.
“You wanna make another baby?” he asked excitedly.
I slapped his chest and gently pushed him away.
“No, I do not. Not yet anyway. But I’d sure love to practice, cowboy.”
Jesse dropped his head back and roared with laughter at my attempt on his accent. In all the years since I’d first come here, I still hadn’t mastered it.
“God, I love you, Armalita.”
“Hey, what’ve I done wrong? You only call me Armalita when I’m in trouble.”
“Nope.” he shook his head. “I think you’ll find I call you Armalita before I fuck you long and hard and smack that delicious ass of yours.”
I thought about it and he was right; I just assumed it was make up sex.
“In that case, Mr. Connor, you’d better take me to bed and do what you’ve got to do.”
With a dip of his body, he had me upside down over his shoulder and carried me upstairs, creeping past Clemmie and Hunter’s rooms so as not to wake them.
He made good on his promise on fucking me long and hard, but he also gave me a baby, too; you’d think I’d have learned that when Jesse Connor wants something, he usually gets it. So, nine months and ten days later, Ruby Jessica Connor was born completing our family. She was named after a fluffy white rabbit and her great, great aunt who had died the previous fall; and just like her she was loud, sassy and opinionated, but adored by everyone.
A week after Ruby was born, I sent a thank you card to Dean and Ambrose Ricks-Johnson, thanking them for being the best couple I had ever met.
The End.