Chapter Eighteen
Holly
It was strange to be walking around in Xavier’s ex-girlfriend’s clothes. I tried to ask him about her, but there didn’t seem to be much to tell. I had never met her before but vaguely remembered a girl called Mandy from a school a few years my senior and wondered if she was the one he had gone with. I couldn’t remember her well enough for it to make a difference, though. Xavier didn’t seem to have all that many ex-girlfriends, which I found very strange. I was sure, however, that he’d been with a lot of women. He seemed a lot more subdued now, but the Xavier I remembered from years ago was someone that was carefree and wild. He’d always had a bit of a wildness about him, and even now I sensed it still lurking.
I still couldn’t believe that I had kissed him. I told him that the night before was mostly a blur for me, but it wasn’t true at all. I remembered every second of that moment with him on the couch. I remembered the way his lips felt against mine, and mostly I remembered how he had made me feel. I’d never felt that way before, and I knew it wasn’t just because of the alcohol. It was amazing. He had been amazing. And stopping had been the hardest thing I had ever done. I couldn’t believe that I’d managed to sleep next to him without anything happening. I couldn’t quite figure out how he felt about me. He hadn’t tried anything more with me, and I wasn’t sure if it was because he regretted the kiss or because he also wanted to do it again. Every so often I’d catch him looking at me in a way that made me think it was the latter.
After our amazing breakfast together, Xavier drove us to the church. We saw my father walking towards us, and my heart immediately started pounding in my chest. I wasn’t sure why I was so nervous. I guess I was just scared that he would see right through us. He was my father after all, and he knew me better than most people did. Could he just tell that something that happened? He was beaming at us though and didn’t seem to be any the wiser on the situation.
“Xavier. This is a nice surprise. I didn’t know you were coming today. Morning, Holly. I hope you had fun last night.”
I smiled. “I sure did,” I said and tried not to look at Xavier. Fun wasn’t the right word to use. It had been one of the best nights of my life and going to the club had nothing to do with it. “I was on my way and I bumped into Xavier. He was kind enough to offer to help out.”
“Oh, that’s wonderful. Thank you. There’s only so much that we can all do around here. We could use a bit of muscle. Some of the girls are going to go insane when they see you, though. They all think you’re a catch.”
Xavier chuckled. “Well, I’m more than happy to help out where I can. They don’t really like me, they just like that I’m a fireman. So what’s the plan for today? What are we doing?”
“We are rebuilding and painting one of the member’s houses. We have a whole team of people on board. Most of it has been done, so it’s mostly just working together to get it finished up soon. It’s amazing how quick we can be when we all work together. I hope you’re both ready to get dirty, though. Those clothes are not going to look the same when you’re done today.”
I looked down at my outfit and laughed. I was about to dirty his ex-girlfriend’s clothes, and the thought actually filled me with so much pleasure it was hard not to laugh at it. “Oh, I’m more than happy to dirty these clothes.”
“Really? But they’re such nice clothes,” Xavier teased.
“Nah, these old things? I might not even wear overalls.”
I had to force myself to stop the conversation before my father figured out that something strange was going on between the two of us. I turned my attention back to my father and then laughed when I saw Polly running towards us. She sure could run fast for an old lady. I thought she was excited to see me until I noticed her hurtling straight towards Xavier.
“Oh, we have a fireman helping us today? Goodness me, that is good news. You see, Holly, I knew having you back in town would be good for us. You’ve brought us lots of great luck. Look at this gorgeous man. Xavier, I haven’t seen you in ages. It’s so good to see you.”
Xavier chuckled. “It’s good to see you too, Polly.”
“So, you’re here to help?”
“I sure am.”
“Oh, if only all the other boys could be like you. Now, tell me that you’re single and that you like older women. Much older women.”
My father and I looked at each other and chuckled. Xavier was looking more and more uncomfortable as Polly spoke. She then took his hand and walked him around introducing him to everyone as her boyfriend.
“She’s hilarious,” I said to my father as I watched Polly walking around with Xavier proudly on her arm. Polly was a firecracker, and she’d always had a thing for the men. She was always telling me who was good looking and who she wanted, no matter what age they were.
“She sure is. I haven’t seen her look that excited in a long time.”
“And there I was thinking she was running towards me.”
He laughed. “So, you and Xavier seem to be getting along great. I always knew the two of you had something special. How nice of him to help. But that’s just the sort of man he is. He is always there for me. You won’t believe how many times I’ve called him over to help me with something and he always comes right away. Heart of gold, that boy. He has done so much for this family.”
I cringed at the word family and nodded. “Yeah, he’s a great guy. Okay, so where should I start?”
I was desperate to change the subject. The last thing I wanted to do was to think of Xavier as my family. Especially since I’d just kissed him the night before. The more I thought about it, the more uncomfortable I felt. Was that what everyone else thought about Xavier and me? Did they look at us and think that we looked like brother and sister? The thought made me feel ill. I forced myself to stop thinking about it.
My father took me over to an area that needed painting and gave me the tools to start. He then walked over to Xavier and asked him to help with a bit of the heavy lifting. I spent the rest of the day painting and trying not to look at Xavier as he helped around the house. Sweat was pouring down his shirt, and I kept wondering if he was going to take his shirt off. One time I found myself just staring at him with my paintbrush in mid-air and I had to force myself to look away. Polly came up to me just then, and I jumped.
“Isn’t he beautiful?” she said and sighed.
I chuckled. “Is he your new boyfriend?”
She grinned. “He is for today.”
“I’m sure he’s more than happy to oblige,” I said. At that exact moment, Xavier turned to look at us, and we both burst out laughing.
“Uh oh. Looks like we’ve been caught,” she said. “I better go and make myself look busy.”
Xavier frowned at me. He obviously wanted to know why we had been giggling like schoolgirls. I just shook my head and looked away, and I was glad when he didn’t come over. I had to be careful. I couldn’t be caught staring a man that everyone considered to be my brother. Everyone except Polly, it seemed, who had no issue with ogling at Xavier with me. If only everyone could be like her, but I was very aware of the fact that my father did not agree with her sentiment. I carried on with my work, making sure that I was constantly busy with something.
The morning rolled into the afternoon with ease, and I was surprised at how quickly the time had gone that day and how much we had gotten done. The church community was a great one, and I looked around and smiled at all these familiar faces around me who were so willing to help those around them. I didn’t even feel bad from all the drinking I’d done the night before. Usually, I would’ve stayed in bed all day nursing the hangover and feeling sorry for myself, but this had taken me completely out of it. I felt great about what we had done and glad that I hadn’t put myself first. Xavier caught me smiling and came up to talk to me.
“We did well today,” he said. “You’re a hard worker. No wonder everyone loves you around here.
“We did. And hey, thanks for coming with. You’re an even harder worker today. You really didn’t have to come with, and I appreciate it. I know my father appreciates it too. And Polly,” I said and giggled.
“Oh, I don’t mind. It was fun. It’s just the sort of thing I like to do. And what exactly were you and Polly chuckling at earlier? You were both looking right at me. I tried to catch your eye afterward but you looked away. Were you talking about me?”
“We most certainly were,” I said without hesitation. There was nobody around at that moment, and I saw no reason to lie. “Oh, Polly is so in love with you. She was telling me how gorgeous you were.”
“And what did you say? Did you tell her that you agreed with her?” he teased.
“I said I simply didn’t see it.” I looked at him up and down and tried to keep a straight face. “Yep. I still don’t see what the big deal is.”
He pushed me playfully. “You cut me deep, Holly. You cut me deep. So, any chance you want to go for dinner with me tonight? All this work has left me starving. And anyway, it would be nice to spend a night talking without having to shout. That club was so loud last night. We probably didn’t hear half of what we were saying to one another. Also, seeing as though you are clearly not into me, I want to see if I can change your mind.” He quickly shook his head after that last bit and smiled guiltily at me. “Sorry, I know we said we would see where things went and take things slow. I can’t help myself sometimes. But I’d love to go to dinner with you. Even if it’s just as a friend.”
Did I want to go out for dinner with Xavier? Of course, I wanted to. Did I think it was a bad idea? I certainly did. Was I going to ignore that feeling and go anyway? Oh yes.
“Polly is going to be so jealous of me,” I said.
“Is that a yes?”
“That’s a yes. Dinner sounds great. I’m also starving. Today was a lot more work than I thought it was going to be. The dinner feels well deserved. And yeah, going as a friend would be great, Xavier. No matter what happened, I still get along great with you, and it would be a shame to stop being friends because of one little mistake.” It wasn’t a mistake, but I didn’t know what else to say. He looked slightly hurt by my comment but then quickly smiled.
“Great. Let’s do it. Dinner as friends. Well then, I’ll pick you up at seven.”
“I’ll be ready. Oh, do you want these clothes back, by the way?”
He smiled. “No. You look good on them. Keep them. You can keep them as your painting outfit or something.”
I chuckled. “Good idea. See you later, Xavier.”
He walked away before I had a chance to say anything else. I saw that he went right over to Polly and gave her a huge hug. She squealed with delight and fanned her face, and I chuckled. Despite still nursing a bit of a hangover, I was having the best day that I’d had in a long time. Had Xavier always had that effect on me? No wonder I’d been so miserable for the past few years. Maybe it had nothing to do with my job and everything to do with the fact that I was away from him. It was a sobering thought.
I got my bag and headed to my father, who was also packing up.
“All done?” he said.
I nodded. “Yeah, all done. Unless you want me to do anything else?” I was hoping he’d say no. It had been a good day but a long day and all I wanted was a nice warm shower before the dinner with Xavier.
“No, I think we’ve done enough for today. Isn’t it incredible how much we managed to do?”
“I was just thinking the same thing,” I said. “These people are wonderful. It’s almost a laugh to think about how little the people in my previous job did every day. I wish they could see how important it is to all come together and work hard. They would never have worked like this today. They would’ve been hiding in the corner pretending to work while I did it all. Look how much you can accomplish when everyone has the same mind set.”
“Absolutely. It’s what I always try to preach to everyone. We have a great community.”
“We certainly do. You don’t always realize it until a day like today when everyone comes together.”
“Thanks for all your help today, my darling. Everyone was telling me how lucky I am to have a daughter like you, and I felt so proud. I kept saying ‘yep, that’s my Holly.'”
“Ah, Dad, that’s nice. Thank you. I’m proud of you too.”
“Listen to us. We’re nauseating, aren’t we?”
I chuckled. My father and I were always going on about how lucky we were to have each other. We never fought and we’d always gotten along great. But we’d seen so many other families constantly at each other’s throats, and we felt proud of the fact that we were nothing like them.
“We’re the best father-and-daughter duo out there,” I said.
“Without a doubt. So, you must be exhausted. Do you want to maybe catch a movie with me tonight? I’m not sure what’s showing, but I’m sure we can find something to watch. Or, if you want, we can even just watch a movie at home. I’ll make popcorn and tea. I don’t know about you, but I feel like just putting my feet up after a day like today. Maybe it’s different for you young ones, but I definitely feel my age after this.”
“Oh, well, actually Xavier is taking me out for dinner, and I already said yes.” I felt uncomfortable saying this to him even though there was nothing wrong with it. It wasn’t a date so why was I so nervous. I guess I was worried that my father would see through my lies.
“Oh, that’s nice of him. Has he found you a guy yet?” he asked. “I’m sure his firefighter friends are all just as nice as he is.”
I laughed. “Not yet. Maybe tonight, who knows?”
“I heard Theresa telling someone that she still wants to set you up with her son.”
I groaned. “The egotistical one? No thank you.”
“You’re a great girl, Holly. You’ll find someone when the time is right. I wouldn’t worry about it.”
“Exactly. I’m not in a rush.”
“Yes. It will all happen in God’s timing, just as it was intended to. Leave it in His hands, and everything will be fine.”
I felt a little sick at the words, and along with the nausea came an intense feeling of guilt. I knew I should call up Xavier and cancel the dinner, but I also knew that I wouldn’t.
“Yeah, everything will be fine,” I repeated and forced myself to smile.