Chapter Twenty-Four
Holly
I was on a date with Xavier whether I wanted to admit it or not. It wasn’t the kind of date I was used to, though. It was mixed with a confusing blend of excitement and sadness. Excitement for the night ahead, and sadness for the decision we were going to eventually have to make. I knew that what we were doing was not a smart move to make. I knew that it was only going to make things so much harder for both of us, but I also knew that I was going to simply have to make the most out of every second we had together. I walked into that bar feeling excited, and when Xavier turned to smile at me, it was hard not to feel like the most beautiful girl in the world. No man had ever made me feel that way before.
When we arrived at the bar, I looked around, scanning the room for familiar faces, and I was pleased to see that I knew nobody there. The only person that I knew was Silas, who was getting ready up on stage. He waved to us, and we waved back. We grabbed a drink from the bar and settled down at the front to wait for the band to start. It was a small bar, with no dance floor at all. Instead, it was filled with lots of small tables and chairs all facing the stage. The place was already nearly packed, so we were lucky to find the table that we did, with the perfect view of Silas. The moment we sat down Silas, walked up to the stage and introduced himself. We made sure to scream and holler for him, and I was pleased to see that the people around us all did the same. For the next hour, we watched him sing and cheered for him all the way. It wasn’t my sort of music, but it was impressive nonetheless.
When he was finished with his set, he came to join us.
“You were incredible,” I said to him. “You were even better than the last time.”
“Really? You’re not just saying that because I actually sucked?” he asked.
“She’s not,” Xavier interrupted. “That was great.”
Silas beamed. “Thank you. I think I’m finally starting to get a bit more confident. The more I do this, the easier it’s getting. The crowd seemed happy at least. It’s good to see you here, Holly. Pity you have to put up with my brother all night, though.”
I laughed. “I know. It’s the price I had to pay to come and see you perform live.”
The three of us immediately fell into an easy conversation. We talked about old times and how things had changed since then. I had always had a better relationship with Xavier, but I’d always liked Silas too. It was a pity that he didn’t keep in touch with my father, but it wasn’t my place to ask him. I figured one day everyone would come together again. Then again, I almost wished now that Xavier hadn’t been as friendly with my father as he had. If only he’d been more like Silas there might not have been as much confusion as there is now for us.
“Want another drink?” I asked Xavier a bit later. I realized that I’d had two drinks already while he’d only had one. This wasn’t at all like the Xavier I used to know who just wanted to drink and party all the time.
He shook his head. “Wish I could, but I’m driving.”
I smiled at him in amazement. “Since when did you get so mature?” I said.
“He’s just getting old,” Silas said. “Listen, I’m off to meet a friend at a club nearby. Do you two want to come?”
“I’m not sure. I’m kind of liking it here, actually,” Xavier said. He looked at me. “How about you?”
“Same. Also, I’m exhausted after today. I’m not sure I can do a club. But thanks for the invite.”
“No problem. If you change your mind, you know where to find me.”
The moment Silas left, Xavier turned to me.
“Are you really that exhausted?”
I laughed. “Not at all.”
“Want to get out of here?” he said and grinned at me.
“I thought you’d never ask.”
We rushed out of the bar as if our lives depended on it, and made our way to the hotel. I felt a little naughty checking into the hotel with him. I’d been dying to touch him all night, but I hadn’t wanted to do anything in front of Silas. I was sure Silas could tell that something was going on between us, but we’d kept it low-key nonetheless. I was pleased that Silas had to leave early because I wasn’t sure how much longer I could go without being with Xavier. The night had been like torture for me.
We got our room key and stepped inside the elevator. Our room was on the twelfth floor, and it was only the two of us going up. The moment the doors closed, Xavier had taken me into his arms. He pushed me against the mirror and sucked my neck. I moaned and moved my hands up his shirt. He moved from my neck to my mouth, kissing me with more passion than I had ever felt before. I let out a groan the moment the door opened.
“Oh. Sorry. Oh.”
We turned around and saw an old couple standing at the door just staring at us. We quickly straightened up and stood to the side while they walked in. We were on the tenth floor, and we all stood in silence as the elevator slowly made its way up two more floors to let us out. We grabbed our bags and didn’t look at the couple as we rushed out. As we got to our door, we burst out laughing. Xavier opened the door, and as we walked in, we dropped our bags and began kissing in the entryway. Xavier pulled off my shirt and undid my bra as if he’d been doing it his whole life. I leaned against the wall as he knelt down and sucked my nipples. He pulled off his shirt and pushed himself against me, kissing me while his hands roamed freely around my chest. He picked me up, kissing me all the way to the bedroom. We almost fell over a few times as he wasn't looking where he was going, and when we finally made our way to the bedroom, he dropped me down onto the bed. He took off my boots, pulled off my leather pants and my underwear, and then lifted my legs up and placed them around his neck as he bet down to lick me.
“That’s so good,” I gasped as his tongue moved inside me.
He lifted his head up. “Good,” he said before going back down again.
I relaxed back and allowed myself to let it happen, closing my eyes and smiling with each lick and movement of his tongue. He was good at this. So good. I shuddered as my body gave in to the motion, and came longer and harder than I’d ever come before. Ever since the first night we’d slept together, I’d thought of doing it again with him. The moment I came, and he pulled away, I scooted back onto the bed, opened my legs, and told him to take the rest of his clothes off. There was no way that I was done with him. The orgasm had been amazing, but I wanted him inside me. He smiled, grabbed a condom, and pushed himself into me. Xavier and I were like two puzzle pieces that had finally found out that we were the perfect match for one another. I didn’t feel whole without him inside me, and as he thrust against me and kissed me, I was surprised to find myself getting excited all over again. When he came, I came too.
Afterwards, he climbed off me, and I pulled the duvet up over us for some warmth. The hotel room was chilly, but neither of us had noticed it until then. I closed my eyes as he wrapped his arms around me and soon found myself drifting off. When I woke up, I saw that it was an hour later, and Xavier was still fast asleep. I slowly climbed out of bed and made my way to the shower. I had just finished washing my hair when I heard the door open and saw Xavier standing completely naked in front of me. I grinned as he got into the shower with me and immediately started kissing me. All of a sudden, I found myself on the floor of the shower, his penis inside my mouth as he held onto my head. I wanted to do something for him just like he had done for me, and I was glad that he was so ready and willing for it as his shaft slid back across my tongue as far as it could go. Afterward, we finished showering together, not saying anything, but stopping just to kiss each other every now and again. When we were finished, we climbed back into bed.
“Okay, now I’m ready to sleep,” I said and chuckled.
He pulled me towards him again, and I felt sadness suddenly settle over us. We’d just experienced the most incredible night of our lives, but we both knew that we were only trying to make the most of each other because we knew it couldn’t last. It had felt like it was our last night together, and it had made the night bittersweet.
The next morning, we woke up late, and I laughed at the sight of the hotel room. My bra and shirt still lay in the front entryway.
“So this is what our hotel room looks like,” I said as I made my way around the room. It was a top-notch room, but the night before I’d barely looked at it.
“Do we have to leave?” he asked me.
I looked at Xavier and sighed. “What are we going to do?”
“What do you want to do?” he asked me.
“That was the best night I’ve ever had.”
“I feel like there’s a silent but at the end of that sentence.”
“But I’m not sure we should do it again,” I said. “It’s too difficult, Xavier. I’m lying to my father. He’ll die if he finds out what we have done.”
“Is it really so wrong?” he asked.
I shrugged. “I honestly have no idea anymore. I need to figure out what to do. I’m not sure that I can be away from you. But I’m not sure that I can lie to my father either.”
“Maybe we should tell him,” Xavier suggested.
“So, does that mean you’re serious about me?” I asked.
He smiled. “Are you kidding me? I’ve never been more serious about anything in my entire life. That was . . . well . . . I don’t even have words for last night, to be honest.”
I smiled sadly at him. “Me too.”
“I’ll wait for you, Holly. I’ll wait for you until you can be with me.”
“What if I can’t ever be with you?”
“I’m just going to hope that’s not the case.”
I looked at him then, sitting in bed without his shirt on. Life was cruel. Xavier was all I had ever wanted in life. I had always known that but never allowed myself to dream about it. Now he was here, in my bed, telling me that he wanted me, and it felt wrong. It felt right and wrong all at the same time. Either way, someone was going to get hurt. I just had to decide who it was going to be.