Chapter Thirty-Five
Xavier
I’d spent most of the night at the hospital. I went home for a brief nap and a shower and came back the following morning. Most of the team had done the same, with people filtering in and out throughout the night and day. The men that were the most severely injured were going to be in the hospital for a while, and we were all so grateful that they were at least alive. None of us could believe that two of our members had died in the fire..
I stood next to Clint’s bed now, talking to him after the nurse had been to see him. He was covered in burns all over his body, and he looked horrific. Thankfully, they were all exterior wounds, but it was still horrible to see him looking this way. I felt so bad for him. Especially since I barely had a scratch on me. But Clint had always been a positive person, and that hadn’t changed after the fire.
“I’ve always had a thing for Beauty and the Beast you know.”
“Beauty and the Beast?” I asked. What was he going on about?
“I loved it even when I was a kid. Maybe I was always meant to be a beast. It was my destiny.”
I laughed. “That means you’ll get your Belle too.”
“Exactly. Girls love nothing more than a romantic story like this. They’ll feel so sorry for me.”
I chuckled. “I like your attitude.”
“Hey, it’s all I’ve got now. I’ve got to sharpen up my personality seeing as though I’m not going to get by on looks anymore.”
“The burns won’t be so bad in a few months. That’s what the nurse said.”
“Yeah, maybe. How about the others? How are they fairing? I wish I could go and see them, but I’m not allowed to leave my bed. Doctor’s orders and all that. I tried to get up without them watching, but I already got myself into trouble for it.”
“They’re doing fine. Some worse than others. I’m just glad you’re all alive. I still can’t believe how bad that fire was. It got bad pretty quickly.”
He sighed. “Yeah, that’s the thing with these fires. You can never quite tell what’s going to happen with them. One minute everything is fine and the next it’s totally out of control. I had no idea it was that bad going in, actually. I guess that’s the price we pay for the job we do. We knew this when we signed up for it.”
“I know. But still, you always think it won’t be as bad as that. And we had so many people helping out. I don’t think we’ve ever had so many people out on the job at the same time like that. And yet it still took so long to die down. Apparently, there are still guys out there now making sure it doesn’t get out of hand again. There are still a few fires, but they’re small and should be out soon. I’m going to go out and help soon. We’re going to take shifts.”
“Thanks for coming to visit, Xavier. You guys have been amazing. I think I’m going to be in the hospital for a while, so it’s good to have some company. I’ll just pretend like I’m on vacation for now. I’m going to request that I get a stack of books sent to me. I haven’t had a holiday in a long time.”
I smiled at him and wondered if I would still be so cheerful if something like that had happened to me. I was generally a fairly positive guy, but I wasn’t sure if I’d be nearly as upbeat as he was. He was a true hero. I stayed there a bit longer, just talking about the fire and giving up updates as I received them. Suddenly, I heard someone crying out in the hallway, and my heart skipped a beat. Don’t tell me something has happened to one of the injured guys. I couldn’t stand to lose anyone else. I ran outside to see what was going on and stopped short when I saw Holly and Rick standing in front of me. I blinked a few times as I was sure I was imagining it.
“Holly? Rick? What’s going on?”
Holly ran towards me and flung herself into my arms.
“You’re okay, you’re okay,” she said over and over again. “We were looking everywhere for you. I asked for you at reception but the lady was so flustered, she didn’t know who I was talking about. I thought . . . I thought you were dead.”
It was so good to see her again. I hugged her again just to feel her against me once more.
“I’m not dead. Why did you think that?”
“We saw the fire on the TV, and then my dad tried to call you, and you didn’t answer. We were so worried.”
“Oh, Holly I’m fine. I’m fine. I was one of the lucky ones. Two of our guys died, and we have about eight that are injured. I’ve been at the hospital most of the time,” I said, and I patted my jeans and frowned. “My phone must be at home. I haven’t really been thinking straight. I’m sorry you were so worried. Come here,” I said and pulled her in again. She was trembling, and I wrapped my arms around her and closed my eyes. I felt so much better just having her with me. When I opened my eyes, I saw that Rick was looking at me. I didn’t pull away from Holly, but I gave him a sad smile. He looked like he had aged since I’d last seen him. His face was gaunt and pale. I was surprised when he smiled back at me.
“I’m glad you’re okay, my boy,” he said softly.
I let Holly go and gave Rick a big hug. At that moment I didn’t actually care what had happened before with us. I was just so glad to see them both. When I pulled away, I was surprised to see how emotional Rick was. I had never seen him like that before.
“Are you crying?” I teased.
“Even tough men like me cry sometimes,” he said.
I laughed. “Don’t worry. I’ve been crying a lot lately.”
“I’m sorry, Xavier. For everything.” His voice was heavy with sadness, and I wondered what was going on. Was he just relieved to see that I was alive? Why did it feel like there was something he was not telling me?
I frowned. “What do you mean? Rick, what’s going on?”
“Holly will explain it to you. But I just want you to know how much I love you and how much you mean to me. Please know that. No matter what. You have to know that you are important to me. I’m the one that stuffed up. Not you.”
I nodded. “Okay, but . . . I don’t understand.”
“You’re a great boy, Xavier. And I’ve missed you a whole lot this month. Come around for a cup of tea soon, won’t you?”
I smiled. I still had no idea what he was talking about, but suddenly the thought of that milky tea made me very happy. Nostalgia and happy memories surrounded that tea. I would never tell him that I actually didn’t like the way it tasted. Although I was almost certain that I would probably enjoy it now, simply for the pure fact that he had made it for me.
“I’d love that.”
“I’m going to leave the two of you to catch up. Darling, will you call me if you need me to get you?” he said to Holly.
“I will. I love you, Dad,” Holly said to him.
“I love you too. You’re a good girl; you know that?”
“And you’re a good father. Okay? Don’t worry, Dad. It’s going to be fine.”
I turned to Holly as he walked away. “What’s going on? He’s acting very strange.”
“Have a minute to talk?” she asked.
“I sure do. Come on, let’s get a coffee.”
I was surprised when Holly took my hand as we walked over to the hospital canteen to get our coffee. We took a seat together, and I turned to look at her.
“We’re holding hands? I thought you didn’t want to see me ever again? Not that I’m complaining of course. I like holding your hand again. But I’m just very confused. As far as I was aware, you wanted nothing to do with me.”
She looked at me and smiled sadly. “And I thought you didn’t want to see me ever again. I thought that it was you that wanted nothing to do with me.”
“I don’t understand.”
“My father told us both the same story.”
“He did what?”
“He lied to us. I never said that about you, and I only just found out this morning that you never said those things about me either. That’s why he feels so guilty. He knows that what he did was wrong.”
I couldn’t believe what she was telling me. I had never for one minute thought that Rick would’ve lied to us. If he told me that Holly didn’t want to see me then I had no reason not to believe him. I didn’t even know he was capable of lying. “Are you serious? I can’t believe this. Rick is just not the sort of man that lies. I spent a whole month thinking that you didn’t care enough to fight for me.”
“Yeah. I spent a whole month doing the same thing. I couldn’t believe that you would do that to me. I told my father about us, and he freaked out. He wasn’t happy at all and told me that it was disgusting that I would even consider something like that. It was the first proper fight we’ve ever had really.”
“Yeah the two of you always had the best relationship,” I said. It was something I had always admired with the two of them. All kids fought with their parents, but Holly and her father had always just gotten along well. I attributed it to them both just being such nice people. I couldn’t imagine the two of them fighting.
“It was awful, Xavier. I hated fighting with him so much. It felt wrong on every level, but I also wanted to stick up for myself, and I wanted to stick up for you. I didn’t believe that what we were doing was wrong. Anyway, I couldn’t stand to be there anymore, so I stormed out the house and went to my mother’s grave. Then I went and spent the evening with Andrea just to get away from it all. When I came back home, he told me that you had come around and that you felt horrible about what had happened. He made it seem like you felt sickened by the whole thing. That’s why I never contacted you. Because I thought you didn’t want to hear from me.”
“And that’s why I didn’t contact you,” I said. “Wow. I can’t believe he did that. I knew he didn’t want us to be together, but I didn’t think he’d go to those lengths.”
“Yeah. I couldn’t believe it either. It’s just not the sort of thing he would do. That’s why we both believed him I guess. Neither of us even thought about confronting the other person.”
“What does he think now?” I asked. From the looks of things he sure felt guilty about it all.
She shrugged. “To be honest, I’m not sure. He had just confessed when we saw the fire on the TV, and we came rushing over here. We haven’t really had the chance to think about it. It would’ve been nice if we could’ve sat and really talked about the whole thing but there was no time. You were our first priority at that moment. But . . . I think he knows what he did was wrong. And I think he is slowly starting to realize that he overreacted. In fact, I think the fire probably made him realize just how much he needs you in his life. Also, I told him that lying was a sin, so that shut him up pretty quickly.”
I laughed. “Throwing his words back into his face? Good tactic.”
“Also, he’s missed having you around. Obviously, I’ve missed you, but he has too. He just didn’t want to admit it until now. This morning was the first time we even spoke your name. Although for the past month it’s been hanging in the air around us.”
“I’ve missed coming around. I felt like a part of me was missing this whole time. Like I’ve just been surviving instead of living. Holly, shit, this is crazy,” I said, and suddenly I found myself laughing. “Sorry, I know I shouldn’t laugh considering everything that’s going on. But I feel a little giddy at this news. It’s taken me completely by surprise. I don’t think you know just how much I need you right now. I . . . oh, Holly, I love you. I’m in love with you. I have been for a long time, and I haven’t stopped loving you this whole time. You’re the most amazing woman in the world. The fire made me see just how quick your life can end. I don’t want to live this life without you.”
She grinned. “That’s the best thing you’ve ever said to me. Xavier, I love you too. So much. And I want to be with you.”
“Yeah. Screw what other people think. I’m in love with you, and I am not ashamed of it. We should never have been ashamed.”
“Neither am I. I mean, I’m super proud of myself for managing to bag such a hot guy.”
I chuckled. I leaned in and kissed her. I felt my body melt the moment I lips touched and I almost forgot that we were sitting in the middle of a busy hospital.
“I’ve missed that.”
“I cannot tell you how much I’ve been trying not to think about you in that way,” she admitted. “It was too hard to think we might never do that again.”
“Same for me. Listen, I have to see a few more of the guys. But I should be done in about an hour. Will you wait? I want to get out of here with you.”
“Of course I’ll wait. You go and do what you have to do. I’ll wait right here for you.”
I smiled at her. “I love you.”
“I love you.”