I FELT HER before I saw her. The tiny brunette fussing with her nails took the breath right from my lungs and breathed new life into my fucking soul.
The impact from the explosion had forced us on our asses but after double checking with everyone, we were all fine and fucking dandy.
Angel had made his way to the other woman sitting on the picnic table. Her red hair was pulled back into a ponytail that had come loose around her shoulders after the building got hit. He said something to her. She scowled.
I bit back a laugh knowing Angel had met his match. Most women fell all over themselves to get their bodies wrapped around him.
I glanced at the big ass hole in the building. You could see right through to the bar.
A bomb.
In the middle of the motherfucking town. No one checked to make sure we were all right. Why would they? This shithole of a place was run by the corrupt and forced into the ground by the evil we were trying to bring to its knees.
“My nails,” the little one exclaimed.
The taller woman frowned at her friend.
She had said something but I couldn’t make out her words when the small female glanced my way.
Who are you? I found myself wanting to know every single thing about her, but another part of me wanted to have her spread out beneath me, begging me to take it further. I craved her screams. These unexpected feelings soaring through me were unusual. I didn’t like them. But then I did.
“Do you need the ambulance?” I found myself asking.
The little one smiled up at me. “Yes.”
I took her hand, leading the way. “What’s your name?”
“Maxine.”
From then on, I knew I was done. She was standing in front of me, yet I couldn’t reach her. Her words whispered across my skin. Her touch brushed along my bones. I became unraveled by her mere laugh.
“I love you.”
I shot up in bed, my heart racing at the voice still whispering in my ear. Fuck. Rubbing the ache in my chest, I pushed and prodded until all I felt were my fingers and no longer the pain I deserved.
The dream scrambled through my mind. I had no idea if it was real or not. If it had been a memory or just a moment of hope. Pieces of what I had with Max came back every now and again but the only way to know if they were accurate would be to actually talk to her. Instead, like the asshole I was, I shoved her far away from my heart.
Suddenly, the alarm on my phone went off. I had an appointment with the local doctor in town meaning I wouldn’t have to travel to the city but at that point, I would rather saw off my leg with a rusty spoon.
I didn’t remember falling asleep. After Max left her own party on Saturday night, I had done the same not too long after. I didn’t need to be around Angel, knowing my neck was on the line. I never had the intention of hurting anyone or stressing anyone the fuck out but his words hurt.
“If something happens to my baby because of your shit with Max stressing out my fiancée, I’ll fucking kill you.”
I would never do anything to hurt Jay or their baby. The issue Max and I had was far from being over but I would never take that out on a pregnant woman.
I enjoyed pushing Max, but I loved it even more when she pushed back. And fuck me, did it ever make me hard when she became all feisty.
Seeing as there was no time to rub one out, I pushed those thoughts aside and headed to the doctor’s office.
“Mr. Michaels,” the receptionist said as soon as I stepped foot into the small office building. She greeted me with a smile from the perch at her desk.
“Uh … hi.” I mentally smacked myself. I had all sorts of training with etiquette and how to be a proper gentleman. The Navy didn’t just raise sailors, they raised men. But at that point, all of my training went to shit.
The receptionist’s smile grew. “The doctor will see you now.” She giggled to herself. “I always wanted to say that.” She rose from her chair, her bright green eyes taking me in as they slid down my body.
Way to keep it professional, lady.
She cleared her throat. “Dr. Santos is right this way.” She led me down a long hall. Banging sounded, followed by grumbled sighs. “Excuse him. He’s not normally like this.”
“Yes, I am,” came a deep reply.
She jumped, spinning around.
I looked up, noticing a large man standing in the doorway to another room.
“Dale Michaels?” he asked, nodding my way.
“Yes, sir,” I said automatically. Somehow, I knew this man came from power. His demeanor was rough but dominant and one dark look from him put the receptionist in her place.
“You may go,” he told her, waving a hand in front of him.
She nodded, racing back to her desk, and left me alone with only who I could assume was Dr. Santos.
“I’m sorry to keep you waiting,” he said, stepping out into the hall. “And please excuse my abruptness. It’s been a long morning already. This isn’t my usual office.”
“You came from the city,” I stated, stepping into the small room.
“I did. Your doctor from the hospital called me directly.” Dr. Santos followed me and shut the door behind him. “I know you probably don’t want to be here. I’ve been assigned to your case because apparently I’m known for handling difficult” —the corners of his lips twitched— “situations.”
I sat on the couch. “I don’t know what the point of this meeting is. I don’t remember shit. The shit I think I remember is just that … Shit. All of it is fucking shit. And if you want me to lay down while you write in your notepad with your fancy designer suit, you can kiss my white fucking ass.”
Dr. Santos raised an eyebrow. “Are we done?”
I grunted, crossing my arms under my chest. “Depends.”
“On what?”
“You hear to prescribe me pills?”
“Nope.”
“You going to force me to talk?”
“Not if you don’t want to.” Dr. Santos sat on the couch beside me, leaning his arm against the back of it. “You don’t have to talk. We can watch the baseball game.”
“You like sports?” I asked, turning my body toward him.
“I’m from a shitty town in Mexico. All I had as a kid were sports. So yeah, I like them.” His dark eyes pierced into mine.
“You remind me of someone I know.” I rubbed the back of my neck, feeling the walls around me crumble just enough that I could get out my next words. “I fucked up, doc.” I let out a slow breath. “I fucked up bad.”
***
(Max)
I had finally finished unpacking. It only took me a couple of days but seeing as I had nothing else to do, I focused everything on getting my little home the way I wanted it.
Standing outside the studio, I leaned against the door frame. The room was perfect. Not too small where I felt cramped but also not too big where I felt I had to walk miles just to get a set of paints.
Although the room was complete, I still wasn’t inspired. It was frustrating the hell out of me and I had no idea how to fix it. Josee had been patient, knowing I worked well under pressure, but she was paying me to do a job. If I didn’t get something done and soon, it would reflect badly on her. I knew that. She knew that. I just didn’t know what to do without forcing something even though it might have to come to that.
Taking my coffee out to the front deck of my home, I went to sit on the patio chair when a black truck pulled up the driveway.
No. He couldn’t be here.
My heart started racing. My palms became clammy. But while I was trying to force the impending panic attack away, my body hummed for the man I hated.
When Dale stepped out of the large vehicle, I bit out a curse. I didn’t need this right now and he was not helping with my creativity lull.
“What are you doing here?” I demanded, gripping the mug tight in my hands. “And how the hell do you know where I live?”
“We need to talk,” he said, walking up the steps.
My stomach flipped. He always had a deep voice that made my insides stir but ever since his accident, his voice had become lower. Rougher. I could almost feel it sliding over my skin like his calloused hands. A shiver raced down my spine.
He raised an eyebrow, his lips pulling into that sexy smirk of his I wanted to slap off his face.
“We talked already.” I cleared my throat. “Tell me how you found out where I live.”
“People talk.” He shrugged. “Our group of friends don’t hold a lot of secrets.”
“You’re lying. They wouldn’t tell you shit if I asked them not to.”
He chuckled. “Woman, I can get any information I want from them. All I have to do is bat my baby blues. That’s how I got you, isn’t it?”
My cheeks heated, my nostrils flaring. “There’s nothing more to say,” I grumbled, heading for the door.”
“Yes …” He loomed behind me, slamming the screen door shut. “There is,” he breathed in my ear. “You’re just pissed because you know I’m right. You can’t get me out of your head. I invade your dreams. I come to you during those lonely nights when all you have are your hands.” He groaned. “I’m right, aren’t I?”
“You’re an asshole,” I breathed, stomping on his foot. “Now get the fuck out of my way.”
His laugh hardened. “Oh, baby, you know I like it when you get feisty.”
My body stiffened, my mind taking me back to a time when we were okay. When it was just us and nothing else mattered. “I’ll show you fucking feisty.” I shoved him back. “I’m done talking,” I said, keeping my voice firm and opened the door.
“Well, I’m not,” he said, following me inside the house.
“Dale,” I cried, slamming the mug on the counter. “You can’t be in here.”
“Well, I am, so you better as fuck talk to me.” Each step he took toward me caused me to take a step back. The closer he was, the less control I had and it was exactly what he wanted.
“What the hell do you want?” I placed my hands on my hips.
“I want you to tell me about her.”
I faltered where I stood. Leaning against the patio doors, I crossed my arms under my chest. “There’s nothing to say.”
“Like hell there isn’t, Max,” he snarled, coming toward me. “I deserve to know—”
“You deserve to know?” I laughed. “Seriously, Dale. We already fought over this. I’m not telling you shit and you sure as hell don’t deserve to know anything.” I was being a bitch. I knew it. My grandmother would be disappointed in me but this man standing only a few feet away, broke me. He didn’t even know how badly he had caused me to fall within myself. He forced me to drown in the sea of utter despair when I gave birth to our dead daughter.
My chest tightened, my breathing quickening as the evil of my nightmares threatened to take hold. “I can’t do this.” I went to walk away when a rough hand wrapped around my arm.
Dale pulled me back against him, brushing his nose into the crook of my neck. “You need to talk to me,” he muttered, circling his arm around my waist. “I need you to tell me what happened.”
My heart jumped at being this close to him. My knees shook, my head involuntarily leaning to the side to give him better access to my neck.
His mouth brushed over the soft skin just under my ear, a purr escaping his lips. “I need to know. Please.”
That snapped me out of the daze. “It’s not going to do anything,” I said, my voice cracking. I pulled from his grip and took a couple steps away from him before I jumped in his arms and begged for him to do whatever he wanted to me. A part of me wondered if I should. Maybe it would clear my head, motivate me to paint and help us move on. I bit back a scoff. Who the hell was I kidding? That shit only happened in movies.
I slowly turned back around to face him and took a deep breath. “I saw you.”
“What do you mean, you saw me?” He frowned.
“I watched you fuck other women after you laughed in my face when I confessed my feelings for you. I told you I was pregnant and you accused me of fucking someone else. When I threw those parties at the clubhouse, it was my hope that you would open up to me and tell me you had made a mistake, but instead I walked in on you. You would take women to the dark corners of the clubhouse. Bring them to the bathroom. Sometimes one woman, two, even three at one point.”
“Shit,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. His shoulders dropped, but the guilt he felt was nothing compared to the pain and anguish he had caused me over the past couple of months.
“I saw you fucking them,” I said, my voice small. “Your hands on their bodies like you touched me.”
“I may not remember everything but I sure as hell know when I was with those women, it was nothing compared to what I had with you,” he snapped.
“Well, you sure have a funny way of showing it.” I waved a hand in front of my face, admitting defeat. “But it’s done. I need to move on.”
“No.”
“Excuse me?” I raised an eyebrow. “What the hell do you mean no?”
“You are not moving on. Not from me. I refuse to allow it.”
I laughed, shaking my head. “Are you fucking kidding me right now? Are you telling me you want a relationship with me? After all of this time, does Dale Michaels finally want to settle down?”
“Fuck,” he growled. “I don’t know. But I do know that I won’t allow you to move on.” He stepped toward me.
“You can’t tell me what to do, Dale. It doesn’t work that way.” Before I could guess what would happen next, he had me in his arms and threw me on the couch. I pushed him, struggling beneath his rough hold. “Dale,” I cried, trying to shove him off me. Although my mind didn’t want it, my body heated with desire for him.
Dale didn’t say anything. But he made sure to speak with his hands. They roamed up the sides of my body and back down. His fingers gripped my hips, pulling me further beneath him.
“Dale.” Although I didn’t want him to, I knew this wasn’t right. Not for me. Not for either of us.
His mouth brushed over the shell of my ear. “I remember the first time you told me to stop. When I did, you confessed you didn’t actually want me to. You wanted to fight me. Hottest fucking thing ever.”
I shivered, remembering what he was referring to. I had been scared he would think I was a freak but the dominant man inside of him won out and he did what I had asked. The fact he remembered pierced me in the heart, but I couldn’t let him know that. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, no longer struggling beneath him.
He licked up the length of my neck. “Sure you don’t. Just like when you told me you loved me. You didn’t mean that, either, right?”
“Fuck you.”
His teeth closed around my ear. “I’m trying.”
I whimpered. “You … you …”
“What?” His hands massaged into the flesh of my rear.
There was little clothing between us with him in his sweatpants and me in shorts. A couple adjustments and I knew he could be inside me. I shook my head. No. I couldn’t. Not after everything he had done to me. But I wanted him. I wanted him to take me away and allow me to just feel. No emotions. No tenderness. I wanted rough and fast. I wanted it so hard that one thrust would force us to break.
“I hate you,” I said instead. “So damn much.” God, I couldn’t stop this. Hell, I didn’t want to.
Dale sat back, pulling me with him. His lips trailed down the length of my jaw. “Say it again,” he demanded, fisting my hair in his hands.
“I hate you,” I repeated.
“Good,” he growled and crashed his mouth to mine.
I gasped at the rough impact, opening instantly to him.
His tongue forced its way into my mouth, sliding along mine. The kiss became hard, desperate. It was like our souls were calling out to each other.
Dale tugged my head back, thrusting his tongue into my mouth.
A shiver trembled through my body. Memories of our time together, rushed back. Moments of passion, hours of ecstasy, all invaded my mind.
Digging my fingers into the hair at his nape, I tugged and pulled, deepening the kiss. Our tongues meshed, dancing. Both of us trying to take ownership over the other.
I could feel his body harden beneath mine, a part of him that had given me so much pleasure in such a short amount of time.
His hands traveled down my back and gripped my hips, pulling me hard against him.
A shot of electricity hit me straight in the center.
When our hips connected, we started moving. Clothing covered and breathless, I could still feel him everywhere. Not where I wanted him most but this would do. It had to. I didn’t know if I could have sex with him again. As much as I wanted—
“Stop.” He released my mouth with a wet smack, tugging my head back. “Stop fucking thinking. Feel me, kitten.”
“Shut up,” I snapped, shoving him.
“No.” His eyes burned into mine. “You shut the fuck up.” He grabbed my hips, undulating his beneath me. “You feel how fucking hard I am for you?”
“Good,” I panted. “I want you so fucking hard you explode. I want you to beg me.” These demands were not the norm for me. I didn’t know what was happening but all my emotions were becoming jumbled and, for once in these shitty weeks, I just wanted to feel. Skin against skin. Breath mixing with breath. I wanted to hear our moans and screams. I wanted this man to ruin me and, in turn, I wanted to force him to his knees.
Dale threw me back onto the couch, covering my body with his. “I’ll beg, Max. I’ll fucking beg until you tell me to stop.” His teeth grazed down the length of my jaw. “I’ll beg until you give me permission to do whatever I want to you.” Dale covered my mouth with his, the kiss slow and deep.
I moaned, taking all of him in, and wrapped my legs around his hips.
He pushed his hips into me at the same time I lifted mine.
We repeated our movements until I found I couldn’t stop.
Dale controlled every inch of me, much like he had done in the past. But now it was different. So damn different I didn’t know where he began and I ended.
I wanted to lose myself in him. Even though I hated him, I knew he could make me feel good. He could take away this pain and destroy me just the same. I had given him my heart and he crushed it in his hands.
Dale inched his hand under my tank top and cupped my breast. Of all the times I was thankful I was still in pajamas, this was one of those moments.
He released my mouth, pulled the fabric higher, and latched onto my nipple.
Arching beneath him, I pushed my breast harder into his mouth.
He sucked and pulled, nipping me until I cried out at the delicious pain. He repeated his movements with the other one.
“Fucking delicious.” Fisting the fabric, he pulled it over my head.
My breathing picked up at the dangerous heat in his eyes as they roamed down my naked torso.
I hadn’t lost all the weight from the pregnancy. Knowing stretch marks scarred my skin, I moved to cover myself when he grabbed my hands.
“Don’t you dare cover what our child did.” Something switched behind his gaze as he stared at the marks. His jaw ticked, his chest rising and falling. Brushing the back of his knuckles over my lower abdomen, he met my gaze. “You’re fucking perfect.”
***
(Dale)
I didn’t go to Max’s house with the intention of kissing her, let alone having her writhing beneath me.
Once I left Dr. Santos’ office, I felt stripped bare. Completely exposed for the world to see. He was a good guy. Not judging me in the least. He didn’t push when I didn’t talk and even threw on a ball game. I liked the guy but the session had me on the brink of losing it. I didn’t share shit. Ever.
Without even knowing it, I arrived at Max’s house before I knew what I was doing. I wanted to talk and sort some of our shit out. But her sass and feistiness shoved me over the edge until I couldn’t control my actions.
When I saw the marks on her stomach, it drove me past the point of madness. No longer was I feeling guilty but outright enraged with wanting to show her how sorry I was. But the words refused to leave my mouth.
I wasn’t lying when I told her she was perfect. When she almost covered her body, it pissed me the fuck off and I promised I would show her just how beautiful I thought she was.
Crushing my mouth to hers, I tasted her tongue, sucking it between my lips until she purred. She was so damn delicious, it took everything in me not to pull my pants down, move her shorts a little, and shove my cock deep inside her. But I wouldn’t fuck her. Not yet. Not until she gave me permission. I had already done enough.
“Dale,” she whispered against my lips. Her hands roamed down my back, sliding beneath my shirt. Her fingers dug into my muscles, her nails scratching at my skin. She wanted me. Her sweet heat washed over me, calming some of the rage I had felt since waking up from the coma. But it still wasn’t enough. It would never be enough.
Somehow, I knew this moment would end before I intended it to so I savored it and took what I wanted until she pushed me away. Until then, I needed to see how far I could go before she stopped me.
Pushing my hips between her legs, I rubbed my pelvis against hers.
She moaned, spreading her legs wider.
Fuck me, this woman was going to give me the biggest blue balls in the history of sexual frustration. But I didn’t care. I found I needed to make her feel good first. Something poked at my mind, hinting that I had been selfish before. A part of me wondered if she liked it because she never pushed me away.
Pulling her further beneath me, I leaned an arm on the cushion just above her head. It gave me the leverage I needed to circle my hips and push them into her.
She gasped into my mouth, cupping the back of my legs and pulled me tighter against her.
My dick was hard—any harder and it would fucking pierce through my sweatpants.
She wanted me to beg. Well, little did she know, I had been begging since the first moment I met her.
Inching a hand beneath her shorts, I cupped her ass and rubbed myself over her sweet pussy.
Her breathing picked up, her hips following my movements. Releasing my mouth, her eyes glossed over with the darkest amount of lust I had ever seen. “Dale.”
I read her body language and knew she was close to having a release. Taking that as my chance, I brushed my mouth over hers and stopped moving my hips.
She whimpered.
A small smirk spread on my face. Cupping her jaw, I turned her head and kissed up the length of her neck. “I’ll make you come, sweet girl. I’ll make you come so damn hard, you’ll always remember me.”
Her eyes squeezed shut, her mouth set in a grim line. She wanted to tell me off. She wanted to push me away but she couldn’t. I knew it and took advantage. I was an asshole but I wouldn’t hurt her. Not again. I would spend my last breath, groveling at her feet and kissing the ground she walked on before I ever destroyed her heart.
Hooking my fingers into the waistband of her shorts, I pulled the fabric low enough that I could get access to her pussy.
Her eyes remained shut but her breathing picked up.
“Don’t worry, kitten,” I whispered in her ear, tightening my hold on her jaw. “I’ll take care of you.”
Brushing the back of my knuckles over her bare mound, I pushed a finger between the soaked folds of her beautiful cunt. My dick almost exploded right then when she bucked against me.
Rubbing my finger over her swollen clit, I pushed and tugged until she cried out and was squirming beneath me.
But all I could do was watch her. A rosy glow hit her cheeks, her mouth parted on a silent cry, her hands dug into the back of my legs. I didn’t stop. I couldn’t.
I rubbed until she screamed. I rubbed until she begged me to stop. And then I rubbed harder and faster.
“Fuck,” she cried out, shaking beneath me, and only then did I thrust two fingers inside of her. Her eyes popped open, her body arching beneath me.
I thrust until there was nothing left. Her pussy clenched around my fingers, sucking and pulling at me until I inserted a third finger.
She moaned, licking her lips. Her hands circled around my neck, bringing my head down to meet her lips.
Licking my way into her mouth, I gave her what she wanted, and when she came for the fourth time, only then did I stop.
***
(Max)
I needed his dick inside me. I wanted him to fuck me like he never fucked before. I wanted to break him and have him shatter me just the same. But instead, I did the only thing I knew how and pushed him away.
After Dale had me coming around his fingers several times, I shoved him off me. Much to my surprise, he let me.
He sat back on the couch, cupping the raging hard-on sporting between his legs.
My mouth watered at the sight but I shook my head. I couldn’t have sex with him. Not right now, maybe not ever. As much as my body needed it, my mind finally won out.
“You should go,” I muttered, pulling up my shorts and lowering my tank top. My fingers brushed over the stretch marks caused by our baby.
“Yeah. Fine.” He rose to his full height, glancing down at me over his shoulder. “You can fight it all you want, kitten, but I will be balls deep inside of you again.”
“Not if I say no,” I threw back at him.
A wicked grin spread across his face. “Remember the conversation we had when we first started fucking? No? Well I do. But I won’t repeat it.” He leaned over me, his face mere inches from mine. “I’ll just tell you what you told me.” He kissed my cheek, his mouth trailing down the length of my jaw to my ear. “No is not a safe word.”