I wake up, and Lily is in my arms. We are still in her rundown apartment. There’s no magnificent city skyline, silk sheets, or any other of the luxuries I’ve grown accustomed to, but I’ve never felt more content.

I pull her closer toward me, and she smiles in her sleep. Moments later, her tired eyes blink open. She stares up at me, and her smile grows. “You’re still here.”

“Of course I am.”

Lily stretches out, her toes pointing beyond the edges of the covers, then rolls onto my chest, lifting herself on her elbows. Her hair falls messily around her face. No make-up, no designer labels. This is my Lily, effortlessly beautiful. “I was scared you might take off again.”

“I promised you I wasn’t going anywhere this time, and I meant it.”

She rolls onto her back and stares up at the ceiling, her gaze growing distant. She looks worried.

“What is it?”

Lily turns to me. “What happens now, Ethan?”

“What do you mean?”

“Are you going back to New York?”

I lift myself up on my elbow and look down at her. Her eyes are downcast. She’s twisting the edges of the sheet in her hands. I answer slowly. “I have to go back to New York.”

“For how long?”

Letting out a long breath, I sink back onto the pillows. “I don’t know. But I’ll be back.”

“When?”

“As soon as I can. Or you could come to me. My offer still stands, Lily. There’s a place for you in the city with me.”

“No.” Lily shakes her head and sits up, grasping the sheets around her bare chest. She leans back against the headboard and faces me. “I can’t do something like that right now.”

“Does Arizona really mean that much to you? I know it’s home, but there’s a whole world out there. You might like New York.”

“It’s not New York, Ethan.” She struggles to find the words. “It’s this. Us.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, last night was amazing, but there’s still a ton to figure out.”

“I have means, Lily.”

“We have things to figure out, Ethan. After everything that’s happened—the first time you left me, and then the one-night stand, and this whole Vincent thing. I’m sorry, but I can’t drop everything based on a promise right now.”

She bites down on her lip. I can see she’s trying to choose her words carefully. She takes my hand gently. “I know you have all the best intentions, but a lot has changed. Let’s take this thing one day at a time, okay?”

“I understand, Lily. If that’s what you want.”

I’m hurt, but I can’t say I blame Lily for wanting to tread carefully around me. I have a habit of letting her down. I put my arm around her and draw her close. Her head rests against my shoulder. I kiss her forehead. “We should go somewhere.”

“Where?”

I grin. “Anywhere. After all these years, it’s time for us to have one of those adventures.”

Lily sits bolt upright, the sheets falling away for a moment. “Do you mean it?”

“I mean it!”

“Don’t tease me, Ethan.”

“I mean it, Lily. Let’s go somewhere. Anywhere you want.”

“What about your business?”

“A week won’t kill them. We’ve recently come to the end of a pretty huge project. Things should be calmer for a while.” My stomach sinks when I think of the defense contract and all the work my team had put into it. I’ll have to tell them when I return. It should come from me.

I look at Lily, and the disappointment fades. She’s worth it.

I always knew I’d do anything for her.

“Where do you want to go, Lily? Let’s see if I can remember your list. Thailand? India?”

“New Zealand. Australia.”

“Which one’s top of your list?”

“I don’t know. We can go anywhere?”

“Anywhere in the world.”

She lets out a long breath and lifts her face to glance at me. She shuts her eyes and shudders. “I hardly dare dream.”

I frown. “Why not? It’s all possible now.”

“Things never go according to plan.”

“It’s different now. I’m not going anywhere, and I’ve learned my lesson. I won’t let you down again.”

She smiles and closes her eyes. She nestles against me, content. “You know,” I tell her, “I always thought that you’d go without me. You know, travel.”

Lily glances upwards. “I got cold feet once you were gone.”

“I wish you could know how sorry I am for the way I acted back then.”

She lifts her head to catch my lips in a forgiving kiss. “It’s okay, Ethan. I understand.”

I’m not sure that she does. I’m not sure that I understand why I left her, either. At the time, it made sense. I was protecting her. Now I realize how much she lost by waiting for me, and I’ll do anything to make it right.

“What should we do today?” Lily asks me. “Maybe we should go to some of our old haunts. Wouldn’t that be something?”

I smile. “I would love that. But I’ve got some work to take care of first.”

“Oh, okay.”

I can hear the disappointment in Lily’s voice, and I make a suggestion. “You know, my assistant, Jennifer, is in town with me. Maybe you could spend the morning with her, and then we can take a trip down memory lane together this afternoon.”

Lily raises an eyebrow. “Your assistant is in town with you?”

I laugh and hold up my hand. “She’s just an employee, Lily. Well, no, that’s a lie—she’s a very good friend. She keeps me organized and stops me making a fool of myself in front of the press. She’s the only one who talks straight with me.”

Chuckling, Lily gives me a teasing glance. “Ah, yes. You’re a big scary businessman now. I bet everyone walks on tippy toes around you, don’t they?”

I smile. “Sometimes.”

“God, it’s weird to think of you like that. You never had that kind of confidence when you were young.”

“You have to be decisive in business. A team won’t respect a leader who doubts himself. You have to choose a course of action and make it work.”

“Do you miss it here?”

“In Payson? Sometimes. I guess I miss being carefree, taking each day as it comes. But, that was more from being young rather than being in Payson.”

“I don’t know. I still pretty much take life as it comes.”

“I admire you for that. I could never stop asking myself ‘what if?’ What if I can’t pay the bills? What if I get in an accident and have no insurance? What if I lose my job and have no savings to get by?”

She offers an affectionate smile, her fingers trailing over my chest pensively. “Your fears were always different from mine. I always thought, What if I wake up at thirty in a job I hate, and I can’t leave because I’m tied into rent on a condo I can’t afford? What if I take a nine-to-five to keep me going, then realize life has passed me by, and I’ve never seen the world?” Lily shrugs. “My life’s not perfect, but I’m doing what I love. And I have time to work on some of the things I enjoy most: time with friends, and nature. I don’t know. It works for me.”

“Do you hate the idea of New York?”

Lily makes a face. “I don’t know. I guess I worry I’ll get eaten alive out there.”

I laugh. “I think you’d find your feet before you knew it and take the city by storm. Maybe there’s not as much open space, but there’s culture. Museums, Broadway, great food. I think you’d be inspired out there.”

She lays a hand gently on my arm. “I’m sure I’ll see it soon. If you’re not going anywhere, then we’ve got all the time in the world.”

“I’ll take you to the Met. You won’t believe the art they’ve got there.”

Lily’s smile falters, then reappears. She nods. “Yes. I want to see all of that.”

“And I’ll come back here, too,” I vow. “We can hang out at Molly’s and Rumsey Park. Whatever you want.”

“That sounds perfect.”

“You should show Jen some of our spots. She’d love that. She can’t believe I grew up here.”

“Like I can’t believe where you’ve ended up.”

“Give me a chance, Lily. You’ll see I haven’t changed as much as it seems.”

Lily doesn’t say more, just smiles at me and holds out her hand. “Shower?” She drops the sheet she’s holding and leads the way.

I follow her to the bathroom. It’s a tiny little room with white tiles and the smallest shower I’ve ever seen. Lily turns on the water. Moments later, the shower’s filled with steam. Lily steps back under the water and beckons for me to join her.

I squeeze in, laughing because there’s so little room. I’m squished up against the glass, and Lily’s squished against the tiles. The shower spray encompasses us both. Neither of us can get away from the stream. We have to hold our breath to kiss without drowning.

When Lily pulls back, she’s laughing. “I bet shower sex is a lot more convenient at your mansion.”

“It’s a penthouse.”

She throws back her head and laughs, the water streaming down her throat, dozens of droplets trickling down her bare skin.

I grow hard. I raise Lily’s arms above her head and press her against the tiles. She grins, and I kiss her.

Our mouths press together, our tongues meeting, hot water splashing over us.

Lily reaches for me and closes her hand around my thick cock. She bites down on her lip when she feels how hard I am, then teases me with long, gentle strokes.

“Fuck, I want you.”

I spin Lily to face the tiles and run my hands over the sides of her small breasts and down her slender waist. My hand slips between her legs, and my fingers press in.

She gasps, then moans, her hands uncurling against the wall and pressing flat.

I enter her, circling her waist with my arms and holding her tight as I thrust. Water runs down my spine as I press into her again. She stands on her tiptoes and bends toward the tiles to take me in deeper.

I bite lightly on her ear. Her wet hair sticks to her, and I draw it back from her neck so that I can trail my mouth over her skin. She pushes against me, and I press into her deeply.

Over the sound of the water rushing, I hear Lily’s breathless moans. I reach around and massage her clit as I thrust into her. She comes, her head falling back and eyes closing as she orgasms. I bury my face in her shoulder, kissing her neck until my own orgasm.

We stand under the water for a moment. I hold her closely from behind. She turns into my embrace, lifts her face, and kisses me.

She’s incredibly beautiful. How did I ever leave this woman?