Chapter Twenty-Nine

Brad

I hated waking up without her beside me. Last night had ended with her sleeping on the couch. I had a guest room but no guest bed. Why would I? Anyone who stayed over slept in my bed. No matter how much I had tried to convince her to come to bed with me, she wouldn’t budge. I rolled out of bed and walked into the living room in just my boxers.

She was sitting up, staring off into space. She looked so sad. I wanted to soothe away her worries and the stress I had caused. That had never been my intention.

“Hi,” I said, sitting beside her and pulling her onto my lap.

She reluctantly sat on my lap and leaned her head against my shoulder. “Hi.”

I kissed the top of her head and ran my fingertips up and down her arm in a soothing motion. She relaxed against me, and her soft body felt good against my chest. It was where she belonged always and forever. I wasn’t going to let her go. She was mine. She owned my entire heart. I would never feel what I felt for Mia for anyone else. It was as if she lived in my heart. If she left me, I wasn’t sure I could live.

We sat in silence, simply enjoying the last of her visit. We didn’t have to talk. There had been plenty said. We were stuck in a circle, and the only way I saw things changing was if I changed them. I had to make the change.

“Are you all packed?” I asked softly.

She nodded. “I am. I have to leave in an hour or so.”

“I’ll go with you.”

“You don’t need to. I’m sure you have other stuff to do.”

“Nothing is as important as you. Mia, you are my whole life.”

Her breath hitched. “I know that’s not true. You have a great life here in LA. I’m not a part of that. I’m not upset—please don’t think I’m angry with you. I mean, I was last night, but I do understand. You have a great life here. I know how much you love surfing. I can’t ask you to give that up.”

I chuckled. “I could surf on the east coast.”

“You’d freeze.”

“There is plenty of surfing over there. I just never was interested in it before and never bothered looking into it. I know you love New York. You’ve been there your entire life. You live and breathe that city. I understand that.”

I gave a long sigh. “I have, and I do love it. It isn’t just because I’m afraid to move. I love the city and the opportunities and the fashion.”

I squeezed her. “I know. I understand.”

“I should finish getting ready. I need to call an Uber to get me to the airport.”

She leaned up to look at me, and I took advantage of it. I kissed her, softly and gently at first, trying to do everything I could to infuse how much I cared for her into the kiss. When she pulled away and looked into my eyes, I could see how sad she was. It felt like she was ripping my heart out. I had done that to her.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered.

She offered a wane smile. “I know. I’m sorry, too.”

I rode with her to the airport and we said our good-byes. I had never truly understood when people used the term “broken heart” until now. My heart hurt as we parted ways. It was an odd feeling. When we had said good-bye in the past, I had been bummed. This was different. I felt as if I were losing a part of me.

I couldn’t live with part of my heart missing. I had to beef up my efforts to find a job. It was up to me to move. I had Sunday off, which gave me a lot of time to search for jobs and homes as well as miss her. She would text me when she landed, but I immediately felt her absence. She was going home and back to work. She would settle back into her life—without me.

On Monday, I called Jaxon, asking him to carve out some time to meet with me. I dressed in business-casual attire and met with him in his office.

“You’re really kind of freaking me out,” he said as soon as he saw me. “What’s this about? You never dress like that or come to my office.”

I shrugged. “I want to talk to you about a proposal, and I need you to take me seriously. I want you to think of me as a guy with a successful show on the station you work for, not as your friend.”

“Oh shit. You want more money, right? You have to know that is not my department. I sell you to other people. I can’t sell you to the owners.”

I nodded my head and sat down in a chair. “Yes, you can. It’s what you do.”

He groaned and sat in the chair behind his desk. “What do you want?”

I smiled. “I want to move to New York.”

“Again? I thought you were over that.”

I shook my head. “I don’t think I’m going to get over it, and I can’t expect her to move here. Her whole life is in New York; it always has been. I can’t ask her to move here.”

He rubbed his eyes. “Brad, I’m not even going to try to talk you out of this. It’s obvious you want this woman. I’m only a little pissed I never got a chance to meet her.”

I chuckled. “We only had a few days together. The last thing we wanted to do was spend time going out for a meet and greet.”

“I’m not just a meet and greet.”

“Anyway, I need some help finding a job over there. I know you know people in the business. Can you reach out and sell me to them?” I asked sincerely.

“I can try. I have a few contacts out there. I make no promises, though.”

I nodded. “That’s all I can ask. Can you give me the stats for the show so I can use them when I apply for these jobs you are going to find me?”

He laughed. “I’m glad you’re so confident in me.”

“I have to be.”

He nodded and punched some buttons on the keyboard before his printer started spitting out papers.

“Here you go,” he said. “I’ll see what I can find.”

“I’ll check in with you tomorrow,” I said, standing, feeling a little better about my predicament.

“That’s not a lot of time.”

“I don’t have a lot of time,” I replied.

“Man, you got it bad,” he murmured.

I did have it bad. I went to my office and beefed up my resume with the new numbers Jaxon had provided. On paper, I looked good. I couldn’t understand why the other station had passed me up. I didn’t have any scandals in my past, and there weren’t any skeletons in my closet that could threaten my career. I was a solid bet.

On Wednesday, Jaxon called me in the morning to let me know he had exhausted all his leads. There was nothing out there. I thanked him and figured it was time for Plan B.

I once again asked for a meeting with Jaxon, and this time with the bosses too.

“You ready for this?” Jaxon asked as we waited outside the conference room.

I nodded. “Ready as I’ll ever be. This is my last chance. You’ve got to help me convince them this is a good thing. They’re still going to make money, and I won’t technically be going anywhere.”

“I get it, I do, but these guys are old school.”

I shrugged a shoulder. “Then now is as good a time as any to get with the times. Satellite is where it’s at.”

He laughed. “You were just bitching about the satellite gig.”

“This is different. I keep my show, my audience, and my home base.”

“Gentlemen, they’re ready for you,” the pretty young receptionist announced.

Jaxon smiled at her, and I knew he was about to lay on the charm. “Not now,” I growled, grabbing his elbow and pulling him away from the woman.

“You suck. She’s gorgeous.”

“She’s also your boss’s daughter.”

“Oh, shit. I didn’t know that.”

I nodded. “Trust me. I found out the hard way.”

Jaxon laughed. “Glad it was you and not me.”

“It wasn’t anything serious. I had just started flirting when he introduced her. It was a near miss.”

We walked into the conference room, and nerves instantly crept up on me. Thankfully, Jaxon was cool as a cucumber. This was his thing. On the water, I was the cool one with all the confidence in the world, but this was his arena, and I was more than happy to sit back and let him run the show. He was very good at his job.

“Satellite is the way to go. It saves operating costs while giving you maximum exposure. The show has the potential to grow bigger and better, but we have to branch out,” Jaxon said.

He looked at me and silently asked for permission. I nodded my head.

“You need to know that Brad has already been approached about moving to Sirius. If that happens, you are going to be the one buying the show to keep his audience here in LA happy. This is a win-win for you. Brad can work from New York, increasing your audience and, ultimately, your advertising dollars.”

I sat back and waited, watching the reactions of the men across the table. They were hesitant. There were obviously some logistical details that would have to be ironed out, but it could work. I had to make it work. It was my last shot at keeping the show I had built and building my new life with Mia.

At the end of the meeting, I wasn’t given an answer.

As Jaxon and I walked out, he slapped a hand on my shoulder. “Don’t give up yet. Let them crunch the numbers. I think we had two of them convinced.”

I guffawed. “But not the one that counts.”

“Give it time. The old guy doesn’t like change. He’s always reluctant to do anything edgy or different. Don’t push it. Keep doing a good job and increase your listeners. You have to prove to him you’re a valuable commodity.”

“I am a valuable commodity,” I shot back.

He nodded. “I get it. Relax a little. We should know something by early next week. For now, focus on the show. If I hear of any jobs over there, I’ll let you know. You never know when the next scandal is going to pop up. One man’s grabby hands and potty mouth could mean you get your dream job.”

I laughed. “I never thought I would be hoping for someone to get fired, but I am.”

He shrugged. “There’s only one way to get to the top, and that’s by the top thinning out and making room for rising stars.

I nodded my head, thanked him for his help, and headed for my office. I hadn’t told Mia what I was doing. I didn’t want to disappoint her if I couldn’t make it work. I felt a little guilty for keeping something so big from her, but I wanted to make sure I could make it happen before I said anything. Honesty was important to her, and I understood that. I wasn’t lying; I just wasn’t telling her everything.

We had been texting. It was more a checking-in and sharing-our-days thing. I called her after my show every night and talked to her while she lay in bed. I loved hearing the sound of her voice, even if it was from three-thousand miles away.