Chapter Fifteen - Sylvia
She hadn’t meant to tell him, it just came tumbling out. And now Fedor was looking at her like he didn’t believe a word she had just said.
“You’re pregnant?” he thundered and rushed towards her, and yet kept his distance. Sylvia turned around and picked up the fresh robe and slid it over her shoulders, but she left it hanging, open so that he could still see a part of her naked.
“That’s why I’m sick. I’m not depressed. Just pregnant,” Sylvia said as calmly as possible. Fedor’s eyes were a dark blue now, she was witnessing a new side to him.
“Why didn’t you…” he began to say but she smiled, she knew what he was going to say.
“Tell you? Why would you want to know? You wanted to have nothing to do with me,” Sylvia said and finally tied the chord around her waist. He was breathing hard, his wide shoulders were shaking as she could see that he was trying to control his rage.
“If it’s my child, I would want to know,” Fedor said, taking a few threatening steps towards her. She didn’t move away from him, she wasn’t afraid.
“It doesn’t matter anyway. You don’t have to be a part of my baby’s life,” she said and Fedor suddenly grabbed her by the arms.
“Why? Because you don’t want a dirty criminal scoundrel to be your child’s father?” he yelled, louder than she had ever heard his voice. Then his hands relaxed on her arms and he let her go. Sylvia breathed in and gave it a few seconds before she spoke.
“I know you’re not like all the others. You won’t admit it, but you’re not a dirty criminal,” she said, unable to keep the desperation out of her voice. She wanted him to agree, she so badly wanted him to tell her the truth.
“You saw the tattoos,” he said gruffly.
“You’ve been to prison, so what? You’re nothing like my father. Nothing like the others,” Sylvia protested, throwing herself against his body. Fedor peeled her away from him and held her at arm’s length, looking her directly into her eyes.
“I’m in the mob, Sylvia, I’m just like them,” he said and she felt the tears bubbling up. She was in love with him, she was going to be the mother of his child. This was not what she wanted to hear, she knew it wasn’t the truth. She knew Fedor kept away from the rest. He was respected and feared in the mafia, but she had never heard stories of violence involving him. Why was he holding on to his past? Sylvia cried, struggled to be free of his grip but he wasn’t willing to let go.
“Sylvia, I’ve done things, I’ve seen things. I’m not proud of any of it,” he said, tightening his grip on her arms so that it started to pinch her skin.
“But that’s in the past,” she said, hopeful again. Fedor let go of her arms.
“Yes, in the past. But I still have a reputation. People still think the same of me,” he said, taking a few steps away from her.
“You did it to survive. You were born into this world, you didn’t know any better,” she said, tears still streaming down her cheeks as she watched him stepping away from her. He was going to leave again.
“A reformed criminal is still a criminal. All my money, all my power comes from the crimes I committed in the past,” he said, and he looked like he was suddenly afraid of himself. Sylvia followed him, walked towards him till his back was against the wall and he had nowhere else to go.
She was nearly half his size, and yet he was the one inching away from her.
“I told you before, Fedor, there is so much you can do with what you have. You can give back. Right the wrong. If you really want to,” she said, reaching out her hand to touch his face.
“I’m going to be a father…Sylvia, will you let me be a father?” he said and she bit down on her lip. She had never thought she would see him again, and here he was, asking her the one question she had wanted to hear all these days.
“If you want to,” she said and he grabbed her by the waist and lifted her up to kiss her.
This kiss was gentle, giving and he licked her lips slowly.
“This is wrong. Your father will never forgive me,” he said as he held her up. Sylvia shook her head and smiled.
“He left me alone with you and I fell for you. We did nothing wrong,” she said, wrapping her arms around his neck. Fedor Volkov was going to be the father of her child. There was nothing to stop them now. They could finally be together again.
“I’m sorry Sylvia, for putting you in this position, for sending you away. I didn’t want to lose control of myself again. You are irresistible,” he said and kissed her again. Sylvia kissed him back, running her hand down his large muscular back. She felt safe in his arms, happy with him. This was what she had been yearning for all these days alone in this house, just to be in his arms again.
“I know why you did it. But I thought you didn’t want me anymore either. Fedor, I wanted you from the moment I walked into your study,” she said laughing, unable to contain her happiness any longer.
“Are you crazy? How could I possibly not want you anymore?” he said and slid his hand down the front of her robe. Sylvia squealed and was laughing again, till his hand reached her breasts and she couldn’t laugh anymore. He was going to be inside her again.