I don’t know where I am.

I hear metal crunching, glass breaking. I hear voices and engines. I hear machines, beeping, more voices, more engines, more beeping. For a while, it all goes quiet.

And then I hear Noah. He’s crying and Alice is there. She’s calming him down. I don’t know where I am. I hear voices, more voices, and more machines. I feel a hand, I hear Noah, I hear Mia. I hear Mia screaming. I feel another hand, more machines, hours must pass. I don’t know where I am.

And then slowly, the world comes back to me. I open my eyes and it feels blurry, like it’s filtered and warped. I blink and groan. My whole goddamn body is in pain. I feel like that time an IED went off near our convoy and my ass got blown halfway across fucking Syria.

I groan and try sitting up, but someone stops me. It takes a little while before I can focus enough to see Mia there, looking at me with this concerned expression.

“Hey,” I say to her. My voice sounds like I haven’t spoken in awhile.

“You’re awake.” She looks like she’s about to cry.

“Yeah. Where am I?”

“You’re in the hospital,” she says. “Lucas, I’m so happy you’re awake.” She squeezes my hand and I squeeze back.

Everything hurts. I look around.

“Alice took Noah home for a nap,” Mia says. “She hasn’t left your side.”

“How long have I been here?”

“You’ve been asleep for almost a day,” she says. “What do you remember?”

“Leaving your place,” I say, trying to think. I can see walking to my truck, turning it on, and driving. Then things get hazy. I see headlights… big headlights… filling my rearview mirror.

“Someone was following me,” I say softly. “When I left your house. Someone was driving too close.”

“Who?” she asks, leaning toward me. “Who was it, Lucas?”

“I don’t know,” I say. There’s a gap in my memory, a blank. I just can’t see it.

She frowns, looking disappointed. She takes my hand. “I’m so sorry, Lucas.”

“For what?”

“This is my fault.”

I look at her and shake my head. “It’s not so bad. I’ve had worse.”

“You broke your arm. And some ribs. And you had some internal bleeding. You almost died.”

“My legs okay?” I ask her.

She pauses. “Yeah,” she says.

“Then it’s fine. I’ll walk.”

She sighs. “Lucas, it was the Carters. I know it was them. And it wouldn’t have happened if it weren’t for me.”

“Maybe,” I say slowly. “But I can’t remember.”

“The police suspect something bad happened. They said you might remember.”

I look at her and suddenly something comes back to me. It’s not about that night, but about my truck.

“There’s a camera,” I say.

She pauses. “What?”

“On my dashboard. Did the cops check my truck yet? Did they get a warrant?”

She frowns a little. “I don’t know,” she admits.”

“Find out,” I say. “If they didn’t, there might be a chance.”

“A chance for what?”

I grin at her. “To fucking nail those Carters.”

She looks at me, not totally understanding, but that’s okay.

I don’t know it was them. But if it was, I need to keep that camera out of the hands of the cops. If it’s only been a day, there still might be time. They might not have checked the truck over closely yet. If they only suspect foul play, they’re probably not in a big hurry to spend money and resources going over the vehicle in detail, at least until they talk to me first and confirm the theory.

I’ll have to stall them. If that dashboard camera shows the Carter boys running me off the road, it might get buried. I’m not naïve enough to think that the police would do the right thing and arrest those bastards. I’m sure that the cops are in the pocket of the Carters.

“What are you talking about?” she asks me after a moment. “Should I get a nurse?”

“No,” I say. “Well, yes, but wait. Listen. If the cops get that camera and it shows the Carters, they might try to bury it. You know they’re corrupt.”

She nods a little. “So what do we do?”

“Find my truck,” I say. “Find out what storage facility has it. Then bribe someone to go look in there. You can’t just go in since you’re not family. Tell them that I left something in there that you really need, I don’t know, think up something good. And then take that camera.”

“What will we do with it?” she asks. “The police can help us, Lucas.”

“Maybe,” I say. “First, we’ll make a copy. And then we’ll let them help us.”

She sighs and squeezes my hand. “Okay, whatever you want.”

She has a strange look on her face and I narrow my eyes are her. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” She looks away quickly.

“Mia. Is it my son, is my son okay?”

“He’s fine,” she says quickly, looking back, eyes wide. “He’s totally fine. He’s with Alice right now. They’re coming back soon.”

“Okay.” I let out a sigh and groan a little bit. Pain starts to eat in at the edges of my mind. “What’s wrong?”

Suddenly, she drops to her knees and buries her face in my arm. She starts crying, really sobbing, and I’m totally taken off guard.

“Whoa, Mia,” I say. “It’s okay. It’s okay.” I stroke her hair as best I can. She clings to my hand, her face buried against my side, and I have no clue what the hell she’s crying about.

Slowly, she lifts her face and looks at me, trying to get herself together. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay.” I smile at her and touch her face gently, wiping away her tears. “You’re just stressed.”

“No. I mean, for everything. This is all my fault.”

I cock my head at her then laugh. “This isn’t your fault at all.”

“If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t be in this mess.”

“Not exactly.”

“Lucas.” She stares at me hard, clearly barely holding herself together. “If I hadn’t gotten involved with Caleb… if you had stayed away from me… you wouldn’t be here.”

I sigh, shaking my head, and wince at the pain. “Listen to me, this isn’t your fault. Do you hear? It’s not your fault.”

“Yes, it is.”

“Mia. I slashed Dylan Carter’s tires, and when he came to my house to get revenge, I pulled a gun on him. Then I beat the fucking hell out of his brother. I brought this on myself.” He pauses and sighs. “Besides, we don’t even know if it was them.”

She stares at me for a second. “You slashed Dylan’s tires?”

“I know. It’s immature and stupid, but I was angry. I saw you with Caleb, and I couldn’t handle it. I had to get revenge on them. Unfortunately, I got revenge on the wrong Carter. But anyway, I got angry, and I’m working on that.”

“Still,” she says, chewing her lip. “You wouldn’t have done that if I just stayed away from the Carters like I wanted to.”

“I’m an adult, Mia. I make my own choices. I knew they were dangerous, but I didn’t care. Hey,” I take her hand and squeeze. “This isn’t your fault. If they did this to me, then I caused it, not you.”

“I know it was them.” She looks at the ground. “And I think it’s my fault.”

“What do you need to hear? That I forgive you? Because I do. There’s nothing to forgive, but I’ll forgive you anyway. It’s not your fault.”

“Lucas, you almost died.”

I laugh a little bit. “I’ve had worse. Come here.” I pull her hand and she comes down toward me. I kiss her softly on the lips, sitting up as much as I can before the pain stops me. She kisses me back softly before pushing me down against the bed.

“Stop trying to place blame on yourself,” I say to her softly. “You’re my girl now, right?”

She nods. “Yes, Daddy.”

I grin, joy spreading through my limbs, dulling the pain. “God, I love hearing you say that.”

She blushes and looks away. “I like saying it more than I thought I would.”

“Listen, get that camera. We can beat this and get away from those bastards, but we need that video. Okay?”

She nods at me, looking resolute. “Okay.”

“Go now. Right now.”

“I’ll tell Alice you’re awake and to bring Noah.”

I grin a little bit. “That’s okay, no need to tell them to rush.”

She raises an eyebrow. “Why?”

I press the nurse call button. “Because I’m going to request those good drugs and maybe get some more sleep.”

She laughs softly and kisses my lips. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Good. You can do it.”

She nods, turns, and leaves the room.

I watch her go, smiling to myself. I’m not shocked that she blames herself, but it just underscores really how much she cares bout me. I know asking her to get that camera is no small task, but we need the footage before the cops can get it. Without it, this all might get swept up under the rug, and the Carters will never back off.

The nurse comes soon and they run some tests on me. Eventually I do get those good drugs, which make me fall asleep before Noah and Alice come. But all the while, I’m thinking about Mia and what my future with her is going to bring, and I can’t help but feel optimistic for the first time in a long time.