Summer in Alaska is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen in my life. I expected it to be freezing cold in Alaska all year round, but of course I was totally wrong about that. I was used to weather in L.A. where it’s perpetually nice, but there’s something special about Alaska in the summer that I never expected.

When the snow melts, green shoots begin to peek up through the frozen ground. Water begins pouring down the streams again, the ice slowly breaking apart, and suddenly the world just bursts into life. Animals begin to appear all around, and the green is just so intense that it almost feels unreal.

That’s the environment in which our son Jimmy was born. Last summer, I gave birth to Jimmy, all glorious ten pounds of him. Carson and I were ready for him, or at least we thought we were totally prepared.

But you can’t ever be prepared for what having a baby does to your life. Priorities that once seemed so important suddenly become useless. The axis of your life shifts and tilts toward this new little baby.

I knew I was going to love him, but I didn’t anticipate the visceral and intense feeling of love that I had for Jimmy as soon as he entered the world.

It was hard at first. Carson didn’t know he wanted to be a father until he held Jimmy for the first time, and I could see everything change for him in that moment. We had some late nights and a lot of stress, but Carson was there for it, every single step of the way. Even though he’s a high-powered CEO and a very important man in our city, Carson still made me and Jimmy his first priority.

So we watched Jimmy grow together. He went from a screaming little baby to a happy toddler in basically no time, and eventually he learned to walk. One year later, and the summer is back, and this time it’s absolutely gorgeous.

“You ready, little man?”

Jimmy looks up at me with his blue eyes and his blonde curly hair, a big toothy smile on his face. Well, partially toothy, at least.

“Walk,” he says.

I laugh a little as I sit him down and get his little hiking shoes on. “That’s right, bud,” I say. “We’re going for a little walk.”

“Fun,” he says, and his attention quickly changes to fiddling with my backpack.

Once he’s dressed and ready, I grab my pack, put it on, and then pick Jimmy up. He can walk pretty well but it’s easier to carry him at first.

“Here we go!” I say and he laughs as we head out the garage and up the path that winds through our property.

Carson is at work though he should be back any minute. I decided that I didn’t feel like waiting around the house for him, though. It’s just too beautiful outside to spend anymore time inside, and besides, Jimmy loves the outdoors.

We get a little ways up the path and I finally put him down. Jimmy laughs and runs off the path immediately, like he always does, and I follow behind him. He can’t move too fast, which is good, because he has a never-ending supply of energy that I can’t hope to match.

He crashes through the underbrush, oblivious to everything but whatever he’s looking at in a given moment. He seems so happy, and I can’t pretend like his smile doesn’t bring absolute joy into my life.

I never pictured myself as a stay at home mom, though that’s not the only thing I do. I run Carson’s charities, which is such a cliché thing to do, but it brings me a sense of purpose. Raising Jimmy is great, and I love him with all my heart, but I need something that’s for me. Running Carson’s charities gives me that purpose and meaning and frankly it makes me happy as hell.

There’s still nothing like spending time with Jimmy, though. I can’t help but laugh as he studies a little bush like it’s the most amazing thing in the world. I make sure that there aren’t any thorns and that it’s not poison ivy, and then I let him basically do whatever he wants.

Living in Alaska has changed me a lot. I’m much more outdoorsy than I ever was before. I can identify plants better than I ever expected, and I actually understand what people are talking about when they discuss the many varieties of life in the Alaskan forest.

Still, I’m relatively new to everything, and so I don’t let Jimmy stray from my sight and I don’t want to get too far from home. I can see the house through the trees, though just barely, which means we’re getting to the limits of my comfort zone.

“Tree,” Jimmy says, putting his hands on the bark of a tree.

“That’s right,” I say. “Big tree.”

“Tree,” he repeats and starts to walk around it.

I watch him, smiling to myself. He’s Carson’s son, through and through. He’s brave and curious and a smart, impressive kid. Carson is already talking about how he’s going to take over the business one day, although I think that’s a little premature. Still, I had to admit that Jimmy does seem like he has the potential to be really, really smart, and that might mean he’ll be good at he family business.

It’s not fair to assume he’ll even want to do that, though. Twenty years from now, when Jimmy is finally coming into his own, who knows what he’ll want to do. He might hate the business and want nothing to do with it, and that’ll have to be okay. I don’t want Carson to turn into a man like his own father, though I think he’s very aware of that.

The one thing we don’t talk about anymore is Evan. Not since Evan got locked up. I don’t mention him and neither does Carson, although I can tell that it still eats him up inside. There are still days where he seems taciturn and withdrawn, and I’m pretty sure it’s because he was thinking about his brother. It’s a real shame, but there’s nothing I can do for him. I don’t know why his brother did all of those things, or why any of that had to happen. But it’s all gone now, and here we are, still living our life.

And I’m happy. It shouldn’t be hard to admit, but I am happy. I never expected any of this. The day I ran away from home was the day I began to assume that my life would be spent working for minimum wage, barely getting by, living paycheck to paycheck. Instead, I married a rich, gorgeous man that loves me, and I have his handsome, smart son.

I don’t know how life could get any better.

I smile as Jimmy heads back toward the path. Down below, I think I can hear Carson’s car pull up to the house and the slam of the door.

“Daddy’s home,” I say to Jimmy. “Do you want to see Daddy?”

“Daddy,” Jimmy says, looking at me. “Daddy!”

“That’s right,” I answer, smiling at him.

As I reach for him to pick him up, I suddenly hear something moving through the underbrush. I pick up Jimmy as the sounds get closer, coming faster. Whatever it is sounds big.

My heart starts hammering in my chest. I don’t know what could possibly be out here. I whirl around to face the sound and gape as a large brown bear come climbing around a tree.

I stumble backwards, eyes wide. I knew there were bears out in the forest, but I’ve never seen one before. The only bears I know are stuffed and cuddly and cute.

This bear doesn’t look cute or cuddly. It’s huge, absolutely enormous, and its fur is patchy and dirty. It shows its teeth and lets out a horrifying grunting growl.

“Carson!” I scream, and then I do the stupidest thing I could possibly do.

I turn and start running.

You’re not supposed to run. You’re supposed to stand very still or maybe play dead and hope the bear leaves you alone. But I could feel Jimmy starts to squirm and I knew he wasn’t going to cooperate and somehow keep this bear away.

I have to save my son, I keep thinking to myself as I sprint down the path. Behind me, the bear comes crashing out onto the path, following us.

“Carson!” I scream again. “Help! Please! Someone help!”

I run as fast as I can, my legs and chest burning. Jimmy weighs a ton in this moment, but I’m not letting that slow me down. I keep sprinting away from this bear as it barrels down after us.

It’s gaining, I realize with total horror. I don’t know what’s going to happen when it catches us. I hope that I can throw myself at it, maybe fight it a little bit while Jimmy gets away. Maybe I can slow the bear down long enough to let Jimmy escape. Maybe my death can mean something, and we don’t have to both die in this stupid and senseless moment.

What was I thinking, walking around alone up here? There were never bears around before, but Carson did warn me about them. He said sometimes they stray close to the property, especially when they’re hungry.

Now I’m being chased by a hungry bear and I wish I took his warning more seriously.

“Carson!” I scream again. I leap over a fallen log. Jimmy starts crying, obviously sensing my fear. I’m gripping him too hard as I sprint away from the bear.

I hit a turn in the path and suddenly I feel the ground slip beneath my shoes. Jimmy decides to squirm at this exact moment, and suddenly I’m slipping backwards, sliding along the dirt.

I hit the ground hard, first my ass and then my back sliding along the dirt and the rocks. I grip Jimmy harder, not willing to let him go. Once my slide stops, I get back to my feet, but it’s too late.

The bear some sliding to a stop in front of me and lets out a horrifying, angry roar. I can see my death inside of its mouth.

“Run baby,” I say to Jimmy, putting him down beside me. I don’t look away from the bear. “Run home. Okay?”

“Daddy,” Jimmy says.

“That’s right,” I answer. “Run home to Daddy.”

Jimmy points. “Daddy,” he says again.

“Please baby, run.” The bear is coming at me, mouth open, growling like a feral dog. But this is no dog, it’s bigger than I am and it’s going to tear me to pieces.

Just then, a deafening crack splits the air. I stumble backwards as a red burst blooms along the side of the bear. Another crack and then another, deafening and terrifying, and the bear screams in pain. It turns and starts to lumber back up the path, spilling blood all along the ground.

My heart is hammering in my chest as Carson appears at my side. “Are you okay?” he asks.

“Oh god, Carson,” I say, throwing my arms around him.

“It’s okay,” he says. He hugs me tight for a moment before letting go. “Are you okay?”

“I’m okay,” I say, crouching down. I inspect Jimmy and he seems totally fine, maybe just a little scared. “He’s okay.”

“Shit,” Carson says. “That was a big bear. Looked sick, too.” He walks up the path a bit to look at the blood.

“I thought it was going to eat me,” I say.

Carson looks back at me and grins. He’s wearing his usual suit and holding a hunting rifle. “I’m glad you screamed. Brought me running.”

“You saved us.”

“I’m just happy you’re safe.” He looks around, frowning. “Come on, let’s get you two inside. I’ll need to track that bear down and kill it.”

“Okay,” I say, and I let him lead us back to the house.

Once inside, I manage to get Jimmy down for a nap. He’s tired from all the excitement and falls asleep easily. When he’s down, I find Carson in the kitchen and I kiss him deep and full.

“You just keep saving my life,” I say to him.

“Get used to it,” he says, smiling. “I always will.”

I kiss him again and I know that I’m home. Carson will protect me always, no matter what, even from freaking hungry bears.

This is the perfect man. He still has an amazing appetite for me, and makes me feel so sexy. And now he saved me life yet again. I don’t know where I’d be without him.

I hold his hand and kiss him, and I know we’re going to be okay.