When Mia calls, I don’t answer.

I just can’t. Not yet, at least. I know there’s probably some good explanation for why she got into that car with Caleb, but I just don’t think I’m ready to hear it right now. I still feel angry and hurt, and I’m afraid that I’ll say something that I’ll regret.

Because I still want her. Despite everything, I still want her. I can’t just turn that part of myself off, even though I wish I could. I want to pretend like none of this happened and move on from her, but I just can’t.

I keep seeing her smiling face, radiant in the beautiful afternoon sun. I keep feeling her skin, tasting her lips, hearing her laugh.

I put Noah to bed and Alice turns in early, leaving me alone in the house. The baby monitor sits next to me but Noah is fast asleep as I sip my whisky, staring at the television, trying not to think.

I should probably get some sleep. Midnight rolls around, and I’m still awake, drinking my second and final whisky. I can’t have any more and risk getting drunk, not with Noah in my life. I wish I could drink the whole fucking bottle and forget how I feel, turn it all off, but I can’t be that man. It’s time for me to be better.

As I’m sitting there, contemplating bed, I hear something. There’s a noise outside. It’s a car door slamming, and nearby. Two more car doors slam shut, and I hear voices.

The voices get closer and closer, and I think I recognize one of them. Suddenly, I hear a smashing noise on the front porch.

Adrenaline spikes through me. I quickly get up, run into my bedroom, and get my spare gun from my bureau. I make sure it’s loaded before running back out front.

The voices are still there and there’s more smashing noises. It sounds like they’re breaking everything we have out there, chairs included. I walk to the window and peer out slowly.

I quickly recoil and curse. It’s fucking Dylan Carter and two of his fucking friends. I flip on the porch light and the noise stops. Carefully, I open the front door.

Dylan Carter is standing there, a sick smile on his face.

“Think you could get away with it, asshole?” he says. His friends grin behind him.

“Not sure what you mean.” I grip the gun behind my back.

“Come on, pussy, you really going to pretend like you didn’t slash my fucking tires?” I can see the unhinged anger in his eyes.

So maybe I was wrong about the cameras. “You should leave,” I say to him.

“We fucking saw you, asshole. You’re lucky we’re not going to the cops. You understand that? You fucking owe me new tires.”

“I don’t owe you shit.” It’s actually surprising that he’s not going to the police. I wonder what’s holding him back.

“You think you’re fucking great, don’t you?” Dylan asks, his voice low and menacing. “Big bad Navy SEAL back home and ready to be the cool guy in town again. But guess what, asshole? You’re nothing. You’re a fly under my fucking boot.”

“Get off my porch,” I say to him again.

“Come outside, you fucking pussy,” he says. “Come out and fight us. You got lucky last time, but you don’t have anybody here to help you.”

I want to do it. I want to go out there and beat the fucking hell out of these three assholes. I know I could do it, too. I fought them once before.

But I’m being a better man. I’m growing up. I’m an adult now and a father. Mia’s words again, ringing in my ears.

So I open the screen door and point my gun in Dylan’s fucking face.

He freezes instantly. His cocky grin is replaced by total abject horror. One of his friends bolts, running as fast as he can away.

“Some friend,” I say to Dylan. “Just left you here to die.”

“Jesus man. It’s just a chair. I’ll replace it.” He’s shaking.

“Listen to me, Dylan. Leave me alone. And leave Mia alone while you’re at it.”

“Whatever you want,” he says. “I’ll do whatever you want. Just let us go.”

“Next time, I’ll kill you. I’ve killed before and I won’t hesitate. Do you understand that?”

“Yes,” he says.

I lower my gun slightly. “Run away now.”

He turns and bolts back to his car. His braver or stupider friend follows him. They get in and drive off.

I sigh, putting my gun in my jeans and looking at the mess on the porch. I straighten it up a little bit, but I’ll fix it all in the morning. I walk over to the driveway and groan when I find all of the tires on our cars are slashed.

Fucking stupid. What a goddamn dumb move to make on my part. I should never have gone to the Carter house. I should have known better. Of course they had cameras, just because I didn’t spot them didn’t mean they weren’t there. They probably have a state of the art system, one I’m not trained to see.

Now our tires are slashed, and that’s not going to be cheap to fix. Alice is going to be pissed.

I check my watch. I can go back inside, get a few hours sleep, and then call a tow truck in the morning. I don’t have enough spares to change all four. I’ll get both cars towed, tires changed, and hopefully have them back by the morning. If not, we’re taking the bus to work. And Alice is going to be livid.

I groan and head back inside. I glance down at my phone at the missed call from Mia and wonder what the fuck I’ve gotten myself into. I should be more worried, but oddly enough I’m just happy that she decided to call me. After all this, she still wants to talk to me.

Maybe it’s stupid, since she’s bringing so much trouble into my life, but I can’t help it. Truth is, I’ve instigated a lot of this shit. She wanted me to back off and I ignored her warnings, so I deserve some of this.

I just have to be better. And hope that she’s not lost to me completely.