2
Jessa was nervous to see them leave. It had taken longer than she had hoped. There was almost eight hours between when they had been attacked and when Mike and Milo left. That gave Billy eight hours to be far away. Milo and Michael were supposed to be good at tracking, but she still wished that she could be there. She knew that she had to be with Shane, no matter how much she wanted to be the one to personally take care of Billy. Jessa trusted that Michael would do what was needed to secure her revenge, but she sure wished she could get her hands on him herself.
She looked down at Shane, her brow creased with worry, not sure what was going to happen next. It was the first time that she had been so scared for her young son in a long time. Before the attack, Jessa had just dealt with whatever came her way. She was fine because he was fine. Seeing him like that, so lifeless, made her realize that nothing was okay and if anything happened to him, she would never be okay again.
All she had was time. She had plenty of time to worry and time to watch the blank landscape around her. The house that she had liked because it was off the beaten path, made it harder to find anything to eat, especially because she never wanted to go too far away from the cabin. Jessa was finding it increasingly harder to find food. She wanted to be there when he woke up, and no longer allowed herself to think of any other possibility. But at the same time, Jessa wanted to have something for the boy to eat when he woke up.
So as the first night wore on, she tried to get some sleep, but it was harder than she thought it would be. Every time she heard a noise or felt a movement near her, she would get up. It had been a while since she had been out on her own with Shane and she was spooking herself. There was still the small hope that Mike and Milo would be back later that night.
They never came though, and the sun started to pour into one of the broken windows. Jessa got up and checked the boy’s breathing before she went outside to see how the day was going to look. She needed some fresh air. The cabin was getting stuffy and making her feel slightly claustrophobic.
She wished she could see the pair off in the horizon, but there was no one there. Instead she went back into the house and did another sweep, hoping to find something that she had missed. There wasn’t much food left, which was alarming. If she couldn’t find anything then that meant she would have to try scavenging and leave Shane alone, or take him with her and risk both of their lives.. If Michael and Milo weren’t back by then, she hated to think of how she was going to find what she needed.
As the next day wore on, most of her worries melted away when Shane finally woke up. He was weak and could barely drink any water, but just to see his eyes open was enough for her to settle in her soul. They were both too weak and heartsick to talk, and Jessa spent the rest of the day watching over him.
Several days after the attack, the food had run out and there was nothing left to ration. Shane was hungry and she couldn’t bear to see it. There was no other choice. She had to go out and find something.
“I know you don’t want me to go, but it is pretty safe here. Just stay in the house and I will be back as soon as I can.”
“Okay. I am really hungry.”
She pushed the lengthening hair back from his forehead. “I know you are. And that is why I will be back soon. You know I don’t want to go, but it’s just us right now and we need more than just water. You need some nutrients so that your body can keep healing itself. That is hard work, so I will find or catch something and we will have dinner, okay?”
He nodded, but looked so young while he tried to give her a brave face. Jessa was still not convinced that he was one hundred percent better, but her need for revenge had slackened since he woke up. She had sent Mike and Milo away in anger and felt in some way it was her fault that she had to leave him then. If Michael and Milo were still there, she wouldn’t have to leave Shane alone on the edge of a very dangerous city. Another issue that was her fault and a reminder that she had acted out in anger.
Jessa looked back and waved to him. She had a bad feeling, but she had to push it down. They needed to eat and there was nothing closer that she could bring back for her son, so she had to go out further. Jessa wished that Michael was back, wished that things weren’t the way they were, but she reminded herself that someone had to go. She had never been one for self-pity, but she had to fight back tears that threatened to fall. How had things gotten so crazy?
***
Mike and Milo had been walking for hours and though there were still signs of Billy every now and then, he was moving fast. Michael was afraid that he was going to lose him all together. He didn’t want to go back without doing what it took to keep those around him safe. Michael hadn’t been able to keep his own family safe and he wasn’t going to let anything happen to Jessa. He didn’t want her to have to live with the unease of knowing that the person that had hurt her family was still walking around. It was a hard pill to swallow; he had been doing it for years and he didn’t want her to feel the same way. Michael wanted to save her from any kind of pain, even if the world was so full of it that the task was impossible.
“What are we going to do when we find him Mike?”
Michael shrugged. Milo knew what it was that they had to do, but the boy was getting antsy with all of the quiet. He was new to the group and though he was fitting in, Milo was still not used to going after people. The poor kid had always tried his best to stay away from people because most didn’t like the looks of him. Michael didn’t seem to mind him though and he wanted to do everything he could to keep it that way.
“You know Milo, there is no need to put it in words. Men like that have to be stopped or they will continue to hurt people. We are just trying to keep everyone safe.”
“And get revenge for Jessa?”
Michael nodded again. Milo may have seemed slow at times, but his mind was sharp. Undoubtedly, he could see through the lines. “She has had a run in with them before. That is why they attacked us. They were getting their revenge for their friend.”
Milo shook his head. “Just seems like it's never going to stop at this rate. There aren't too many of us left.”
Michael had much of the same sentiment, but he knew that men like Billy wouldn’t give up. Who was to say that he didn’t get more friends and come back? Michael was unwilling to live with that concern looming over his head. He didn’t want to look behind his shoulder every day. “It does, but the only way to stop a situation sometimes is to take one of the parties out of the equation.”
“I hope that Shane is okay.”
“Me too, Milo. If there is anything that Jessa can do, she will do it. They are tougher than they look.” Michael had to believe it, trying to convince himself with his own words. But she had been doing fine when he met her. There had been issues, ones that had followed her, but Michael was going to take care of those.
The two went back to the silence that made Milo a little jumpy. The tracks were getting fresher and Michael was convinced that they were actually gaining on him. It was getting dark though and there was something he kept hearing behind him that had his hackles up. They would have to stop soon, so he started looking for shelter. As much as he wanted it to end that evening and be done, it looked like Michael was in for a couple of nights without her.
“Keep your eyes out for somewhere to stop Milo. I am worn out.”
The young man immediately went to the task, happy to be of some help. It wasn’t long before they found an apartment building that they could get into. It was high on a hill over the small town outside of the city and it gave them the advantage of high ground to see what was coming. If Michael could have, he would have kept going, but something told him that they needed to hunker down for the night. He didn’t say anything to Milo as they ate their tins of food, but he had a feeling of presentment. Something was about to go wrong.