*may contain spoilers
Okay, so I know way too much about Neonatal Abstinence Syndrome (NAS). Way too much. This book came from a place that I was afraid to write about for so long. A time, after we adopted our son, that I wanted to forget. But also a time that I needed to remember for the rest of my life. A time that was painful while experiencing it but is now a distant memory.
Listening to your child cry and scream in pain is a heart-wrenching and gut-ripping feeling. Something my husband and I felt for exactly nine months. Nine long months. Although doctors and textbooks and Google all tell you that NAS can last anywhere from one week to six months after birth, our experience lasted a bit longer than that. Nine months. You hear your child’s painful pleas for help through these cries as they can’t tell you exactly what hurts, but you just know that it’s everything. You rarely sleep, and when you do, you’re holding your child tight, close to your chest so he can feel you and derive some sort of comfort from that. To feel protected. Safe. You’re terrified that your child won’t thrive because eating rips apart his insides. You worry that his condition will only get worse and he’ll be in pain for his entire life. You worry that all of your efforts in helping him heal will take away from your other child, a baby girl, adopted just nine months before. My husband and I know very well what Neonatal Abstinence Syndrome is because we lived through it. We conquered it. We won. Our healthy son is eight years old now and is known for his huge heart and infectious smile. He’s perfect, and looking back, I can say whole-heartedly that I would trade places with him in a second so he would never experience that kind of pain ever again.
I realize that we are so incredibly blessed because some babies aren’t as lucky as our little guy. Some don’t get better. Some live with debilitating illness and developmental delays. It can remain so bad for so many of these children exposed to drugs and alcohol. Our dude is lucky, and for that we are forever grateful. Our hearts are with so many other babies and children out there who struggle with the prolonged effects of NAS.
I must acknowledge and thank the adoption agency that matched us with our son’s birth family. He completed our Forever Family. He saved our family as much as we saved him. He belongs with us and we are eternally grateful.
My husband’s support during those difficult months gave me the strength to be what our son needed. It was a dark time in my brain, and I cried most days along with our son. My pain was emotional while his was physical. My husband was my rock and will always be. Thanking him is easy and his son loves him so much he tells him every single day. “Dada, I love you.” Hearing that never gets old. I’m also thankful that our daughter was too young to remember those hard times. She and her brother are the best of friends and our Irish Twins. The most precious gifts we have ever received.
I wouldn’t have been able to write this book without my family’s support. My Forever Family and my book-world family.
Amanda Maxlyn: Two years ago, we met on Facebook and became fast friends. We published our first books close together, and the support you have given me has been unwavering. It’s amazing to know that in this business I can place my full trust in you. Thank you for reading this book and providing your invaluable feedback. You know the personal struggles that I went through that inspired me to write about these special characters. You’re amazing and I love you with all of my heart.
Dina Littner: Your honesty and nutty ideas drive me so crazy, but I love you for it HUGE. You know how to push my buttons and to make me think about how to present a scene or scenario. All in a good way. You make me a better writer and storyteller. Shhh—don’t tell anyone. I love you huge and I’m honored to have you as friend and critique partner.
My BETA girls: As my books have evolved, so has my beta process. Thank you all for being there with me through it all. I will always value your opinions and feedback above all others. You know me best and hold me to the highest of standards.
Murphy Rae: You’re a saint and a miracle worker. When I came to you to help refine the Forever Family Series, you jumped in head-first. You told me things that I didn’t want to hear about my first book and then you helped make it better. You helped me distinguish between voices and you breathed life into pivotal characters in these books. I’m so proud of the words that I’ve bled onto these pages, and your feedback and expertise have given me confidence to continue with this hobby of mine. Stay true and honest and awesome. Thank you for helping me grow as a writer.
Elaine Hudson York: I'm truly in love with the incredible interior design for Epic Sins. It literally took my breath away when I saw it. You have been a pleasure to work with and your professionalism is top notch. Thank you so much and I look forward to working with you on the rest of this series and beyond!
Sarah Hansen: Thank you for putting up with me. I know I was a pain in the ass and kept changing my mind about the look that I wanted for this book and the series. I bugged you a lot and you probably blocked my messages for a while. But what you did with this cover! What you created is just amazing. You crafted the perfect brand for the Epic Fail series, and your artistic renditions inspired me to finally finish the first book and get my butt in gear. I’m humbled and honored to call myself a client of yours. You are truly a master and produce exceptional covers. I’m thrilled to brag about you and the art that you created for me. Thank you again and I hope you take my requests in the future.
Becca Manuel: Once again, your vision of my book is stunning. The trailer you created perfectly captures the tone and feelings of Epic Sins. You work magic with your art and I’m so lucky that you connect with my stories enough to produce pure perfection. Thank you.
Julie Deaton: Thank you for your fantastic proofreading services. You are a wonderful person and a true cheerleader for me and my work. Your finishing touches on my manuscript made it perfect.
Forever Family Facebook group: Thank you for letting me pop in and share my stories with all of you. You all know how much I enjoy our interaction, and this place has been my haven to share some of the struggles I’ve gone through as well. Thank you for being my safe place and for always supporting me.
Bloggers: I can’t narrow it down and just talk about a handful of you because you ALL are amazing. Every time I release a book or run a promotion, it astounds me how supportive you all are. It truly brings a tear to my eyes every time I see one of you supporting me in the very best way—you tell your readers and supporters to buy my books. I love you all and I hope you continue to support me as I share more stories.
Authors: My peers are some of my best friends. It’s so comforting to know that I have so many of you ready to give all of yourselves to help promote me and support me. I love all of you so much!
Readers: I humbly bow down to you and thank you for each and every time you’ve downloaded my books and recommended them to a friend. I can’t continue to write these stories without you. Thank you.