The two of us sat there on the roof for longer than I’d planned. We sat until I was shivering from the evening chill.

“Let’s get you home,” Julian said. “Before you turn into a popsicle.”

We climbed down the rusted metal steps and made our way back to Julian’s car. The ride was mostly silent except for me giving him directions to my place. The late hour — or early, depending on how you looked at it — made for a quick ride with no traffic to speak of.

We pulled up to the low-rise apartment I shared with Abby. I unbuckled my seatbelt.

“Thanks for driving me,” I said. “Sorry you missed out on clubbing with your friends.”

“I didn’t really feel up to it anyway.” Julian tried to stifle a yawn. He rubbed at his eyes and craned his neck back and forth.

“You look exhausted,” I said.

“Been a long day,” he said.

Before I could stop them, the words came out of my mouth.

“You could crash on my sofa.”

Julian stared at me. I flushed. I hadn’t meant it to sound like a cheesy pick up line.

“I wouldn’t want you to fall asleep at the wheel,” I said lamely.

He nodded slowly. “Thanks. I appreciate it.”

Already regretting my words, I got out of the car and went to unlock the door. Julian followed me. I paused.

“Abby’s probably asleep,” I said. “We moved in together after…”

After Keith, I was going to say, but I didn’t want to speak his name.

“…so we’ve got to be quiet,” I finished.

We walked through the door and I flicked on the light switch. The living room was empty and Abby’s bedroom door was closed.

“Do you want anything?” I tossed my purse on the coffee table and kicked off my shoes. “It’s too late for coffee, but maybe a decaf tea, or some juice?”

“I could use a glass of water,” he said.

I poured him a glass from the jug in the fridge. When I turned around to give it to him, I was surprised to find him right there. I nearly spilled the water all over myself.

Julian placed a hand on my wrist to help steady the glass. It didn’t help. My fingers shook, making the surface of the water ripple.

He took the glass and set it down on the kitchen table, his other hand not leaving my wrist. A thumb brushed back and forth along my palm. I couldn’t suppress a shiver. This time it had nothing to do with being cold. With that slightest touch, my body was on the verge of igniting.

Julian shifted from holding my wrist to taking my hand.

“I wanted to thank you,” he said.

“For what?” I asked, my voice a near whisper.

“For coming to the concert,” he replied. “And for the drink. And the game. For everything, really.” He squeezed my hand. My heart fluttered. “I know it’s been weird, the two of us working together again.”

“That’s one way to describe it,” I muttered.

“But I really appreciate what you’re doing for me.” He brought my hand to his chest, pulling me closer. I could feel his heartbeat against my skin. “I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

“You would have found another lyricist,” I said.

“Maybe,” he replied. “But none of them would have been you.”

I was about to retort that he didn’t need to use platitudes, but his next words had me coming up short.

“I’ve missed you.”

My throat closed up.

Julian never used to say things like that. If we were ever separated for long periods, he’d simply pull me into an embrace and ply me with kisses.

Julian’s eyes were bright, earnest yet resolute. He tugged me closer, until we were nearly pressed together. The heat of his body seeped into me, even through our layers of clothes.

He bowed his head. The ends of his hair tickled my cheeks. His gaze burned into mine. My eyes fluttered closed. He let out a breath, the warm air a sensual caress. I parted my lips with a sharp inhale. He touched his nose against mine, a small nudge. I let my head tilt to just the right angle. He shifted, clasping my hand tight and drawing me into him.

“I missed you, Ev,” he repeated softly.

My eyes snapped open. His lips were a hairsbreadth from mine.

“I can’t,” I whispered.

Julian stilled. I pulled back reluctantly. He stared at me, confusion and pain in his eyes. I removed my hand from his grasp. He tried clutching me, not letting me go for a moment, then relaxed his grip and let me slip away. I let my arms dangle uselessly at my sides, not sure what to do with them. I ended up folding them across my stomach, hugging myself.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“I just… can’t.” I stepped back and went to the living room. “I’ll get you some blankets for the sofa.”

He reached out and touched my shoulder. I stopped, my heart thumping madly in my chest.

“That’s not an explanation,” he said.

“It’s the best one you’re going to get.”

“Ev, don’t shut me out.”

I barked out a laugh. “You’re one to talk.”

“I know I’m not—” his voice sounded strangled. “Not the best with words…”

“Understatement.”

“But we always understood each other,” he continued.

“Did we?”

I could hear the frown in his voice. “Of course.”

“Sometimes I don’t think I ever really knew you.”

There was a tense pause.

“Is that why you don’t want me?” he asked.

“That’s not—” I ran a hand over my face and let out a frustrated breath. “That’s not it.”

“Then why?” Julian pressed. “We were so good together. Why can’t we just pick up where we left off? Why can’t we be together again?”

Outrage filled my chest. I whirled on him.

“Because you’re in love with Seth!” I shouted.

His face went blank. I swallowed down a combination of panic and indignation.

I hadn’t meant to be so loud. I hoped I didn’t wake up Abby.

But at least it was out there. At least Julian knew where we stood.

I watched him as I breathed heavy, angry breaths.

Julian stood perfectly still. I waited for the guilt to cross his face. Waited for him to either vehemently deny it or shamefully confess.

His lips pressed together. The corners twitched. I knew he was trying to stamp down some emotion threatening to bubble to the surface. He was always doing that.

Those lips began to curl upward at the corners, twitching into a half-smile.

I frowned. Why the hell was he smiling? Did he think this was a joke?

That half-smile spread into a full grin as a chuckle left his mouth. Then another. And another. The sight in front of me was one I’d ever thought I see.

Julian was laughing near hysterically.

“Seth?!” he exclaimed with a howl, almost doubled over. “You think I’m in love with Seth?”

I crossed my arms over my chest, hurt that he was laughing at me.

Julian let out a few more gasping chuckles, trying to contain himself. He shook his head, an unfamiliar smile still playing on his lips.

“Ev, I love Seth,” he began.

Pain radiated from my chest.

“I love him,” Julian continued. “Seth is like a brother to me. But in love?” One last chuckle escaped. “That’s a hard no. Being with someone like Seth would take the patience of a saint.”

“But— you and him—” I started.

“You know the guy just as well as I do,” Julian continued. “Can you ever see someone like me being with someone like him?”

My brain swirled in a storm of confusion and turmoil.

“But—” I protested weakly. “I thought—”

Julian came to stand in front of me. He placed his hands on my upper arms, making me face him full on.

“I’m not in love with Seth,” he said firmly.

“You’re not…?”

“No.”

He lowered his head. I let out a shaky breath. I waited for him to say the three words I’d been waiting to hear my whole life.

He didn’t say them. But what he did say was just as good.

“Let me show you.”