My toe jiggled up and down. I crossed and uncrossed my legs. I suppressed a sigh and blew on my steaming hot coffee to cool it down.

Maybe he wasn’t coming.

After spending most of the day puttering around my apartment with Julian — making breakfast, doing the dishes, working a bit on our song — I decided I couldn’t put it off any longer.

I needed to talk with Seth.

I’d held a grudge against him for so long. I’d thought the worst of him for years. I’d thought he was the villain of the story, the reason Julian had left me.

It turned out my own stubbornness had been the cause all along.

The cafe door jingled. I looked up. Seth walked through the door. His auburn hair was combed away from his face. His green eyes locked on mine. Those eyes turned wary before he plastered on a smile and made his way over.

“Hey, Ever,” he said brightly, taking a seat. “What’s up? Julian said you wanted to talk to me?”

I fidgeted in my chair, shifting my weight from hip to hip.

“It’s Everly now,” I told him.

“You never used to use your full name,” Seth said.

“Things are different,” I said. “That’s sort of why I wanted to talk.”

Seth leaned forward expectantly, waiting. The moment drew out between us. The silence stretched. My hands clenched around my coffee cup.

“I’m sorry,” I blurted out.

Seth cocked his head, surprised. “For what?”

“For a lot of things,” I said. “For some stuff you don’t even know about.”

“Shouldn’t I be the one saying sorry?” he said. “I’m the one who broke up the band. I’m surprised you’re not scratching my eyes out.”

“Not gonna lie, I used to think about it,” I said.

We shared a small smile.

“But that’s the reason we’re here.” I inhaled deeply. “I blamed you for a lot of things for a long time. I thought everything that went down was your fault.”

“I’m the one who left,” he reminded me.

“I’m the one who didn’t listen,” I said. “I should have believed it when you and Julian told me you didn’t trust Keith.”

“That slimy asshole,” Seth muttered under his breath. He shook his head and met my eyes. “You should be mad at me. I convinced Julian to leave.”

“Julian told me he thought I’d come to my senses if he left.”

“That was my fault,” Seth said, shame-faced. “I gave him the idea. I was a dumbass back then. I didn’t realize how awful that was. How immature.”

“We were all dumbasses,” I said.

“I guess we were.”

“There’s one more thing,” I looked down into my coffee cup, face flaming. “This is so embarrassing to admit.” I took a deep breath. “I thought Julian left me for you. I thought he was in love with you.”

Seth blinked, taken aback. He stared at me. Then he let out a choked snort. Then a muffled chuckle. Then he couldn’t contain it anymore and threw his head back, laughing out loud.

“Oh fuck, can you even imagine?” he chortled. “That would be a match made in hell.”

“I’m not saying I thought you actually stole him from me,” I said. “Even though Julian’s bi, I know you’re straight. But I thought you were stringing Julian along, making him think he had a chance.”

Seth’s eyes went wide. “Why the hell would I do something that shitty?”

“I know,” I groaned, putting my hands in my face. “I thought the worst of you. I was just so upset and angry. I think I just needed to believe Julian had left me for any other reason than my own stupidity.”

“It’s not stupid to want your dreams to come true,” Seth said. “That’s what Keith offered you. I wish you hadn’t listened to him, but I don’t blame you for doing it.”

“You should blame me.”

“I think we need to stop blaming each other,” Seth said. “I think we need to learn to forgive each other.”

“I forgive you,” I said immediately. “I get why you did what you did.”

“And I forgive you, too,” Seth replied.

We both seemed to let out relieved sighs at the same time.

“I’m glad we were able to work this out because I have a favor to ask you,” Seth said. “Would you take a look at the lyrics to my song and let me know if they’re shit?”

“I’m sure they’re not shit,” I said.

“I’m certainly not as good with words as you and Cerise,” he said.

“You can’t be any worse than Julian,” I said.

“How’s that going, by the way? Julian doesn’t talk much about what the two of you are doing.”

“It’s… going,” I said with a grimace. “We did have something, but Cerise said it was no good.”

“If she said that, then I’d believe her,” Seth said.

“The song needs to sound like a Julian Woods song,” I explained. “But everything I’ve written sounds like me.”

“That’s tough,” Seth said with sympathy. “I’m sure you guys will figure something out. You always wrote amazing songs together with the old band. That’s why I want your help. You’re so much better at this kind of stuff than I am.”

“Sure,” I said. “I’ll help you out.”

“Thanks, Ever,” Seth said with a bright grin. I didn’t correct him. He’d only really known me as Ever, after all. “I’ll make it up to you somehow.” He tapped his chin, looking thoughtful. His eyes lit up. “I know! Why don’t we get the old band back together? Just temporarily. We can practice a few songs, maybe do a small gig. What do you say?”

My heart squeezed painfully in my chest.

I hadn’t performed in so long. And I hadn’t performed a song by Where Angels Burn with the two of them in even longer.

There were so many nights when I lay awake in bed, staring at the ceiling in the dark, wishing everything could go back to the way it was. I would have given anything for one more concert.

But in the back of my mind was a dark, swirling mass of fear.

What would Keith do if I tried to get back on stage?

I suppressed a shudder.

“I don’t know,” I said. “I’m pretty busy with my current work. I wouldn’t want to take time away from it.”

Seth looked crestfallen.

“Maybe when everything is done,” I added, hating to see that expression on his face.

He brightened up. “I’d love that.” He stood from his chair and came around to wrap me in a big hug. Although I was startled, I returned it. Seth had given me these big bear hugs many times before. It had been so long, I’d forgotten how comforting they felt.

“I’m really glad we talked,” he said. Then he grinned. “Even if you did think I was a man-stealing home-wrecker,” he teased.

“It’s not that far-fetched,” I said. “The two of you are so close. Julian’s so open around you. He acts so differently. Like he can let his guard down around you.”

“He acts that way with you, too, you know,” Seth said with a soft smile. “Maybe you can’t see it because you’re too close to it, but I’ve never seen Julian look at anyone the way he looks at you. He worships you.”

“You think so?”

“Definitely.”

A small ball of relief unfurled in my chest. It wasn’t that I doubted Julian cared for me. It was just…

He’d never said it out loud.

I pushed those thoughts away. I didn’t want to be that insecure girlfriend. I had to trust that Julian would say he loved me in time, when he felt safe and secure enough to do so.

It just hurt he didn’t feel that way now.