Chapter 2 - Ellie
He’s here. He’s back.
I try to still the beating in my chest as I shuffle towards my car. I see the black rental car and I know it’s his. Who else would drive through this town?
I still remember that day, almost ten years ago, when I gave myself to him. I lost my virginity to him and then I found out what was really going on. I found out that he didn’t care about me at all. The betrayal and anger and hurt I’d felt had been unbelievable. I remember crying and crying and crying until my whole body hurt. I can still feel a shadow of that hurt when I think about it now a decade later.
Every month and year that goes by I think I’m over it. I’m a grown woman now, I have a career. On Monday I’m leaving for the biggest trip I’ve ever taken, the trip that will skyrocket my journalism career to new heights. I’m over Derek Hart. I was a teenager when all that happened, and it’s over now.
I ignore the magazine covers, I change the radio when his voice comes on. My life goes on. I’ve had relationships - I almost got married! What happened when I was a kid in high school shouldn’t - no, doesn’t - affect my life.
And then out of nowhere, once every couple years, I run into him on Main Street, at Gray’s Grocer, at Finlay’s pub. I can’t explain the jumble of feelings that assaults me whenever his tall, muscular body comes into view. Or when my name rolls off his tongue.
Eleanor.
I hate whenever anyone else calls me by my name but secretly when he says it… I don’t know. It sounds like music on his tongue.
I dump my shopping into the back seat and jump into my car. I need to go home and pack, and I need to get Derek Hart out of my head. Whether he’s in town or not doesn’t affect my plan for the next couple days.
I’m going to North Korea. Little Ellie Walters from Greenville, Tennessee is going to be the lead investigative journalist to the nuclear threat in freaking North Korea. It defies all reason and logic and it fills me with the deepest sense of excitement I’ve ever felt.
My mother doesn’t approve, of course, but she’d have been happy for me to marry Chad Baker and have lots of babies in a house two doors down from hers. When I broke off the engagement six months ago I think she was move devastated than I was.
I just can’t bring myself to stay in this place my whole life. I need to see the world! And what better place to start than North Korea? The thought makes me grin. This opportunity fell in my lap and I’d be a fool not to take it.
My house is just on the edge of town. I pull into the drive and hop out, excited to pack up my supplies. I unload my shopping and head inside. As soon as I drop my bags on the kitchen counter, my phone starts ringing.
“Hey Maggie,” I say as I answer. “What’s up?”
“GUESS who’s back!” my cousin exclaims.
“Umm.. Slim Shady?” I respond, nestling my phone in between my ear and my shoulder as I start unpacking the bags.
“What?”
“Nothing,” I reply with a grin. She’s been my best friends since we were born and I know that half the time she has no idea what I’m talking about.
“Derek Hart is here! Charlotte put together a bouquet for his mother.”
“I know, I saw him at Gray’s,” I respond, switching the phone to the other ear. Not even ten minutes and the whole town knows he’s back and what’s he’s bought and for who. They’re probably talking about what he was wearing and how his hair is still tousled and messy in that perfect rock star kind of way - or maybe it’s just me who notices those things. This is exactly why I need to get out of here.
“You saw him?! How does he look?” Amazing, muscular, manly, sexy, irresistible, like a freaking ROCK STAR… all the words pass through my head at lightning speed before I can stop myself.
“He looks fine,” I say.
“Fine?” I can hear Maggie’s voice strain. She knows how I feel about him. I think she might be the only person who knows that I still think about him all the time. “Fine as in like… fiiinnnneeee, right?”
“No, fine. Like… usual. Like he always does.” I say. I’m bluffing, delaying the inevitable questions from Maggie.
“Ellie, stop. HOW did he look? And don’t say fine. You know yourself he looked incredible and now your head is spinning and you’re leaving and you don’t know what to think.”
I pause, leaning against the counter. I’m holding a tin of tuna with one hand and grab the cell phone with the other, straightening out my head. How does she know me so well?
“Yeah. I mean…” I sigh. “Maggie, what am I supposed to say? He’s a complete asshole and that hasn’t changed in ten years. He still had that stupid arrogant smirk on his face! Besides, I’m going to North Korea in two days and I’m going to publish a report on what’s going on over there and then who knows where that will take me! Who cares what Derek Hart is doing or what flowers his mother is getting for her birthday.”
My exasperation is growing. I don’t know how I feel! My heart was beating when I was talking to him and I can still smell that spicy, manly scent that surrounded him. I haven’t felt that thrill in the pit of my stomach since… I don’t even remember. But it’s Derek Hart. It’s the heartless bastard who made a fool of me when I was a teenager and I will never forgive him for it.
“You need to come to Finlay’s tonight.”
“I have to pack, Maggie, I can’t go to the bar.”
“Ellie, it’s our last Friday night together!”
“Fine,” I respond, pretending to give in reluctantly. I grin. I want to see her, and I know I need a distraction tonight or else my thoughts will drive me insane.