Chapter Twenty-Nine

Kayla: CALL ME WHEN YOU WAKE UP

Ian: Great game last night! Bet Bobby loved it ;)

Ian: DON’T LOOK ONLINE

Ian: JUST COME DOWN TO BREAKFAST

Helena: I’m glad you made up.

Helena: Bear is worried about you. Call me?

Bobby: You were amazing. Could have been a figure skater in a previous life ;)

Chris: We tried to get ahead of the pictures and take them down, but the leak happened so quickly. I’m on it.

Dan was certain he didn’t want to know what pictures everyone was talking about. He grinned at Bobby’s message, sent him back a smiley face, told him he loved hockey too much. Chris’ message was concerning. Biting the bullet, Dan opened his news app, inputting his own name into the search box. There were pictures of him and Bobby at the coffee shop, some holding hands, others focusing on fond looks. The reporter Dan remembered from the press conference had an article that included his soundbites, pictures from the Olympics – it looked terrible.

Dan: Fuck, Bobby, I’m sorry.

Ignoring Kayla and Helena’s pleas for him to call them, Dan packed the rest of his bags and headed down for breakfast. Hopefully, Bobby would text before he had to board the plane.

“Dan,” Ian said, looking worried. “Sorry, man.”

“Whatever,” Dan muttered.

Most of the team were already present, Alaric giving him a nod, and Carry nudging his shoulder with a, “Sucks dude.”

It grated on his nerves, making it seem like having a drink with someone—a guy—was bad and wrong and newsworthy. He just wanted to fix things with Bobby. He managed to get through the rest of breakfast by ignoring everyone, Rafael and Ian helping by boxing him into the booth, glaring at people who tried to catch Dan’s attention. It would usually bother him, but for once he was grateful that he got to eat his breakfast in peace.

When the call came to board the plane, Bobby still hadn’t texted him back, and Dan turned his phone off, stomach rolling with nausea. He had just managed to fix things with Bobby and now he was back to being ignored. He managed to get a seat by himself, shoving his bag onto the seat next to him. It didn’t usually work, guys jostling each other to get the only empty seat, but he must be giving off signals that he didn’t want company because everyone was content to leave him alone.

Rafael took the seat across the aisle, Ian shoved against the window, and Dan rolled his eyes.

“I don’t need babysitting.”

“Tough,” Rafael said. “You’re not the one who’s gonna get an earful from your sister.”

“Kayla? Why would she be texting you?”

Ian snorted, phone in hand, peering around Rafael’s bulk to give Dan an unimpressed look. “Dude, he was with Kayla yesterday afternoon, after meeting with you.”

Dan was torn between telling Rafael to back the hell off his sister, and incredulous surprise. He settled for a dissatisfied grunt, looking back out of the window. Everybody was getting their shit together except for him.

“I care about her,” Rafael said seriously.

“Do what you like,” Dan said, ignoring the look shared between Rafael and Ian. “You might as well be happy.”

Rafael tried to talk to him again, but Dan jammed in his headphones, turning his music up to a volume he usually wouldn’t, but he needed to drown out everything, even his own mind. He was tired of thinking, of worrying, of having his private life be a subject of public opinion. He might not be able to sleep on flights, but he could shut out the world for as long as it took to fly home.

It was easy enough to ignore everyone in the airport, get through baggage and out to a cab. His phone was a heavy weight in his pocket and he pulled it out, turning it on. He had to call Chris, had to know exactly what was going on.

“Why do they still care about the pictures?” Dan said, without preamble.

Chris sighed. “Hopefully they’ll be distracted by the playoffs. News usually tapers off in favor of predictions.”

“It can’t come soon enough,” Dan grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Maybe if the Hunters get into the first round, they’ll worry about our progress instead of who one of their forwards is banging.”

“We can but hope,” Chris said, sounding amused. “I’m doing what I can to help out with this, but it’s difficult to get ahead.”

“You can’t predict when someone will take photos of me,” Dan said, resigned. “Thanks for what you’re already doing.”

Dan hung up after Chris reassured him he’d do everything he could to keep Dan’s life as private as possible. It wasn’t a promise he could really stand by, but Dan appreciated it all the same.

Kayla was still waiting for his call, having left more messages for him to talk to her, but Dan wasn’t up for trying to convince anyone else that he was fine when he really wasn’t. Bad enough that he had to face Helena when he picked up Bear. He had the cab drop him off at Helena’s and wait, not wanting to get dragged into a long conversation.

“My cab’s outside,” Dan said when Helena opened the door. “I just need Bear.”

Helena looked disappointed, but she dashed off to find Bear’s leash and the rest of his stuff. Bear raced down the hall, stretching up on his back legs to give Dan a welcoming hug. Dan sighed, nuzzling into Bear’s fur and scratching at his sides and hair. Helena returned holding a rucksack.

“I put all the stuff in here. Return the bag whenever.”

“Thanks,” Dan said. He hesitated, noting Helena biting at her bottom lip, looking worried. “I’ll call you later, all right? I need… I need time.”

“Sure,” she said, leaning over to hug him over Bear. “Take care.”

The cabbie looked unimpressed to have a dog in the backseat, but Dan promised to pay him extra if he didn’t complain. It was stupid to overpay for a cab ride, but Dan just wanted to get home and not have to deal with any headaches over things that didn’t matter in the long run.

Shoving a handful of bills at the cabbie, Dan juggled dog, bags and apartment keys as he headed into the building, groaning as his phone started to ring in his back pocket. Managing to work it out of his pocket in the elevator, he hit the call button without looking to see who had called.

“Hello?”

“Are you ignoring me?” Kayla snapped, sounding pissed off.

“Yes, Kayla,” Dan said, exhausted. “That’s the whole point of not answering your messages.”

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

“I don’t know,” Dan said immediately, letting his anger get the better of him. “It could be the fact that my personal life is all over the internet. Maybe it’s Bobby ignoring me after promising not to. Maybe it’s the fact that I have a hockey game tomorrow and we have to make the playoffs or I’ll be traded. I don’t know, Kayla, what do you think?”

Kayla was silent for long enough that the elevator stopped. Dan had to drop Bear’s leash, grateful that he was trained enough to run up to Dan’s door and stop. Struggling down the hall, phone jammed between his shoulder and ear, he fumbled the key into the lock.

“You’re my sister and I love you, but you have no idea how hard this is for me.” He swung open the door, Bear racing in ahead of him, and dropped his bags enough to grip his phone. “You spend so much time with Bobby and telling me to talk to him because you know what’s going through his head and yet you can’t tell me? I’m really not interested in trying to make you feel better, Kayla.”

Hanging up the phone, Dan slumped against the door, staring into his empty apartment. It was lonely, this life he had carved for himself, and he hated himself for how much he still wanted Bobby to fill those spaces.