Current Day

Standing this close and not touching her is way harder than anticipated. With my hands shoved deep into my pockets, I rock back on my feet to avoid pulling her close and giving her the proper hello she deserves. When those soft brown eyes greet mine with a longing only I can fill, it’s hard not to toss aside reason and ravish her body. Damn hard.

“I didn’t expect you to come.” Her voice cracks toward the end and almost breaks my willpower.

“I need to talk. Look, I—” I shake my head and look away for a second. I spent last night going over what I was going to say, and the second I see her, all sensibility goes out the window. “Can we talk? Just hear me out.”

She steps aside, and the little patter of feet come barreling across the floor.

“Jax!” Tristan comes up and fist bumps me. “I watched you play Chicago.”

“You did?” I pretend to groan. “I didn’t play too well, but I promise to come back stronger after the break.”

Trenna stands off to the side, working her foot into the floor.

“Hi, Trenna.”

She smiles and drops her chin while shuffling over to me. She spreads her arms, and I quickly dip to one knee. I bite back the emotion overwhelming me as her little arms wrap around my shoulders, not fully reaching.

“I missed you.” Her words are spoken so softly I almost miss them.

“I missed you, too, kiddo.” I squeeze her tighter and swallow past the lump forming in my throat.

“Kids, how would you like to visit Ms. Neely while I talk with Jax.”

“We want to stay here with Jax, right, Trenna?” Tristan looks over at his sister, and she nods.

“Yeah, Mommy, we haven’t seen him in forever.”

A weight settles on my heart. If she doesn’t take me back, I don’t know what I’ll do. “How about we go somewhere when we’re done? Would you like that?”

“Yeah, where?” Tristan asks.

“Ah, that’s a surprise, but you have to be good for Ms. Neely.”

“Hurry and talk ’cause we want to go.” Trenna places her hands on her hips and stares at her mother. Jocelyn shoots me a playful glare before hauling the kids over to her neighbor’s house. I hunker down on the couch but can’t relax until she comes back.

“How have the kids been doing? Are they still getting harassed?”

“No, school’s been out for a month. I think it’s blown over.”

“I wasn’t sure if you were working or not.”

“Oh, I, uh, don’t work there anymore.”

“You quit?”

“Um, not intentionally.”

“Please don’t tell me they fired you.” When she nods, I have a feeling I won’t like the next answer. “Over me?”

“They couldn’t handle the paparazzi showing up.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.” Her tone goes cold. “Believe me.”

I’m not sure what she means by that, but I nod anyway. “I’m still sorry.”

I hate this. Our conversation feels forced, and that never happens between us. I know one way to make the awkwardness go away: ask what I’m dying to know. “Have you…have you gotten back with Carl?”

Her gaze drops, and my body goes numb. The slight shake of her head should relieve me, but I don’t know why she’s upset. Maybe I’m wrong, and she does want to get back together with him.

“If it were up to him, he’d be moved back in already.”

“That’s not what you want?”

She faces me straight on. “No. He’s not who I love.”

Sagging against the couch, I exhale, the tension in my shoulders dissolving. I’m the luckiest man. In front of me is the most gorgeous, generous woman, who admitted she loves me. I’ll gladly take it.

“Come here.” I wrap my arm around her and hold her like I wanted to do the second I walked through the door. Kissing the top of her head, I say, “I love you so much. It’s been hell not being with you.”

Her body melts into mine, but slow, silent quakes roll through her. I grip tighter, but that only causes a sob to fully escape. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“I love you, too, which makes things worse.”

“Worse? How?”

“Because we can’t get together.”

I back away to face her. “Why can’t we?”

“I don’t know if love is enough.”

“What do you mean? Of course, it is.”

“I can’t survive you leaving me again, Jax.”

“I’m not going anywhere. Look, I shouldn’t have left in the first place, but I thought I was giving you what you wanted. Turns out I’m way too greedy. You’ll never escape my clutches again.”

Her laugh is soft, but with a hint of sadness.

“You say that now, but I’m serious. You’ll want your own kids someday.”

“We’re back to that?” A sudden lightness strikes my senses. Once she realizes the truth, everything will be okay. “No, Dixie, I wouldn’t.”

“You say this now, but you don’t know.”

“Jocelyn—”

“You’ll change your mind someday, and then what? Where will we be?”

“Jocelyn—”

“I can’t have any more kids, Jax.”

“Neither can I.”

“I…wait, what?”

“That’s why I’m one hundred percent positive I’m not that kid’s father. Besides not sleeping with her, I’ve been sterile since I was born.”

“How’d they even know?”

“The technical term is undescended testes. Basically, before I was born, my balls stayed inside me too long and cooked the sperm.” I shrug, my joke falling flat.

“Oh, that’s horrible. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Stubborn, I guess.” I run my hand along my chin. It’s time for me to own up to my feelings. “I wanted you to trust me. Without trust, we have nothing.”

“I know you didn’t sleep with that woman. Even before—”

She stops midsentence and starts rubbing her knee. A nervous habit I noticed years ago. “If we had stayed together—”

“We wouldn’t have had children,” I finish for her. There’s a sense of loss in her eyes. I see it.

“So, when you said things happen for a reason back at your property, you meant my kids.”

“You have three great kids. And as much as I hated our time apart, I’m glad it happened.” I drop my hand to her thigh and squeeze. “You know, I love them, too.”

Her eyes glisten as she raises a shaky hand to her stomach. “Um, I have a confession.”

“Okay.” The way she’s acting, I imagine the worst, like she banged her ex last night.

“I was actually going to call you today, so I’m glad you came over. Telling you in person is so hard though.”

Son of a bitch, she surely wouldn’t have.

“It’s just…” She looks at the ceiling as if she’s summoning courage.

“Did you sleep with him?”

“Who, Carl? God, no.” She leans her head back as if I suggested she was paid to throw a game. “It’s nothing like that, but he did come over last night. I think he was checking to see if you were here.”

I would’ve been had I not needed to do a few things first.

“Anyway, he kept talking about you and what you had done. The more I defended you, the madder he became. But he let something slip.”

“Like what?”

“He knew about that girl coming on to you at Arti’s.”

“How would he know that?” It only takes one quick beat for it to click in place. Son of a bitch. “Please don’t tell me what I think you’re going to say.”

She gulps. “He paid that woman to come on to you.”

Heat torches my skin as I pound a fist into my thighs. He’s so dead. “Why?”

“A sick attempt to win me back. I don’t know; he’s crazy. I think he developed lead poisoning from his bullet wound.” Her laughter holds no humor. “He knew there’d be a scandal and thought he’d use it against me.”

“That’s fucked up. He messed with my life. My reputation. Fuck, he messed with us.”

“I don’t think he meant for it to get so out of hand. He didn’t give you enough credit because he figured you’d cave at her first attempt.”

“Is he at work?” I’m on my feet, ready to go pounce the bastard.

“Yeah.” The hesitation in her voice calms me somewhat. “You have every right to press charges against him. You do what you have to do, but Jax, he’s still my kids’ father.”

“I’m going to go talk to him.”

“What will you do?”

“Just talk for now. And don’t worry, whatever I do won’t involve the police. That I can promise, but I can’t guarantee that I won’t kick the shit out of him.”

“I’d actually buy a ticket for that.”

“While I’m gone, pack the kids’ bags for the weekend because I’m taking you guys somewhere.”

“Where?”

“A place that’s long overdue for a visit—Bowling View. Your hometown.”

“Wow. That’s random. But okay, I’ll call my parents and let them know we’re coming.”

“Be ready in a couple of hours. I’ll be back, but first I have a score to settle.”

The cold air that greets me when I exit the elevator does nothing to simmer my anger. I have one thing in mind, find the conniving bastard and beat the shit out of him. That may be two things, but the guy needs a reality check. It’s not like hitting him is a real option, we’re fucking adults, but when I leave here, his dickless threats will end.

I bypass the cubicles on my quest to his office and ignore the glances from the occasional onlooker. They either mistake me for a client or don’t care. My tan cargo shorts and black tee hardly blend with the other suits, but their lack of security baffles me. I half-expected to bribe my way in here.

“Sir, can I help you?” a petite, older woman asks when I bypass her desk. His office is just to the left.

“I’m here for Mr. Burger.”

“Do you have an appointment?” Her eyes narrow and stray back to the computer screen. That’s all the pause I need to push onward.

“Don’t need one today.”

“Sir, you can’t go in there.” The click of her heels follows behind me, but she fails to reach me in time. It wouldn’t matter if she caught me. Nothing is preventing me from bursting through his door.

Carl’s head snaps up, his eyes widening. “It’s okay, Patty. Shut the door behind you.” He waits for her to leave before addressing me. “What do you want?”

“What I want is for you to leave Jocelyn alone.”

“That’s impossible. We have kids together.”

“I don’t mean for you not to be a father—in fact, you could actually do a better job. What I mean is for the manipulation to stop. Quit trying to dictate her life. Having kids together gives you parental rights, not controlling rights.” I creep closer to his desk and stop within a few inches.

“Who she exposes my kids to is my business.” He straightens in his seat. “They’re impressionable.”

Impressionable? “I’m a baseball player, not some thug off the street.”

“My kids don’t need to be exposed to the company you keep.”

I place my hands, palm-side down, on his desk and lean forward. “Who exactly would that be?”

“You’re the one with the questionable paternity suit.”

“That’s bogus, and you know it. You brought this shitstorm upon your family, not me.”

“We all know it’s just a matter of time before you cave. You always take what isn’t yours.”

“What the fuck did I ever do to you?”

“It’s your type. Athletes. You’re all the same, cocky and arrogant.”

“What? You still have unresolved issues from being left off the team?”

He blanches. “How’d you know?”

Know what almost flies from my mouth. Thank God, I had enough sense to stop it and change tactics. I cross my arms as I stand back up and act as if I know what we’re talking about. “Everyone knew.”

He grinds his teeth together, and his signature tic makes an appearance. After a few moments, he finally says, “I had every right to be on that team. My stats were as good as yours.”

What the fuck? When was he ever considered for the team?

“If your stats were as good as mine, then you could’ve gone to any college.”

“Penn State was the only college considering me. And they gave that spot to you. You took everything. My spot. My girl.”

“You ended up with the girl. It was you who fucked that up. I had nothing to do with it.”

“Yeah, well, you got to her first. I’m not stupid. I know she never got over you.” He springs from his chair and pounds his fist on the desk. “You’re not taking my family.”

“You’re such a selfish prick. Do you even love her? Because if you had, you would’ve seen the subtle changes in her. Like how keeping her from traveling made her unhappy.”

“She was fine. Our marriage was a good one.”

“One you dictated. How could you have spent ten years with her and not know her?”

“You think you do?”

“Yeah, I know more about what makes her tick from just the short few months we spent together back in college.”

“Isn’t that special.”

Damn, this guy is too much. Arguing with him is getting me nowhere. “Leave us alone, or else my lawyer will be on you quicker than you can say lawsuit. For the sake of the kids, I won’t go to the police, but I will tell AJ about this. He’s the one who drank the drink that bitch spiked. Going to the police will be up to him.”

“You have no proof.”

“We have the surveillance footage that shows her spiking it.” Hopefully, he believes this bullshit, but who knows? The bar may have caught it on film. “We were just waiting for a name.”

His face blanches, and for the first time since I walked in here, fear coats his eyes. “Fine. If Jocelyn wants to fraternize with you, be my guest.”

“We’re done here.” I turn to leave.

“I got the best years out of her anyway.”

His words spin me back around. “What?”

“You heard me. She’s had three kids. Figure it out.”

In one quick movement, I grab him by his shirt collar and slam his back against the wall. My forearm locks over his upper torso and angles to pin him in a choke hold. He tries to throw a punch, but I press my free hand into his shoulder and shake my head.

“Give me a reason to pummel your ass, right now.”

He slackens at my words.

The door swings open to a frantic voice. “Mr. Burger, should I call security?”

“By all means, involve the cops.” My lips curl into a snarl, and I ease my hold just enough for him to speak.

“No. I—” He lets out a strangulated cough. “I have this handled.”

She lingers in the doorway, and my patience has run its course.

“Unless you want to witness your boss piss his pants, I suggest leaving.” No further words are spoken until the door clicks shut.

“What do you want?” He squirms under my weight, but I don’t move.

“Your compliance.” I tighten my hold when he lets out a garbled laugh. “You’re in no position to negotiate. Remember this, asshole, the girl went public. Every Goddamn news reporter knows her name. As soon as she resurfaces, she won’t be hard to find. How much do you think it will take for that girl to sing like a canary? I do believe my pockets are deeper than yours.” I push against his neck tighter. “If you so much as even cause Jocelyn to sigh, I’ll sue your ass faster than the cops can tally the charges against you. Do you understand?”

Pure venom spits from his eyes, but after a moment, he nods.

“This is how it’s going to be. You’ll only contact her if it’s kid related. If she wants to move out of the city or out of state, you’ll ask for the new address. If she wants to take the kids on vacation, you’ll buy the fucking tanning lotion. You will not cause her any problems. Understand?”

“Yes,” he chokes out.

I release my grip, and he sags against the wall. Damn, I always knew he was a wimp, but I didn’t know how badly. I start to walk away. “And get used to seeing me around. Unlike you, I’m actually in love with her. She’s not a possession.”